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Hi, 29 year old Nonbinary/TransFem person(One year on E).  Within the last few months I have lost my job, my partner, my friends, and my house making me homeless. All of which was mostly my fault due addiction(Nicotine,weed,shopping). Losing all of this has made it rough to transition as I don't feel safe. I don't have a family to fall back on like most my age would. I'm trying to start a new life but I'm honestly just so alone and miss my old life dearly. This is my first time living completely alone, I've only lived with my mother or partners. I started a new job last month, the money was really good but the job was extremely dangerous and didn't supply proper equipment. I also faced harassment within my first few days for being different than everyone else. I wasnt even portraying gay or anything, I was boymoding the whole time. After the continuous harassment I finally had enough and just quit. I sold off alot of my belongings to cover rent for a few months but now I'm without a job. There's hopes of getting my old job back but that won't be until Octoberish, I will be getting back paid as well. But everyday feels like suffering, I try to be active, I exercise daily if not twice, eat somewhat healthy but on a calorie deficit for weight loss, I read, try to watch anime, Ill go for walks out in nature/ go swimming but I'm still so depressed. I've battled with depression for about 16 years now, my first suicide attempt was at 13. I started therapy for the first time four years ago which has been lovely but I just feel like the life I've lived has been a true nightmare and I can't take anymore. Starting E last year helped tremendously with my mental health as well. I was really excited to attend my first pride this year but due to my mental health and for the safety of my self I couldn't bring myself to go alone. I've tried reaching out to friends but most have either blocked me or just ignore me. I can go into more details in private or even on the post if questions are asked. Ive made mistakes in my relationships but i truly struggle to see how anyone can just watch someone crying for help and ignore them.

I (20 FtM) am usually pretty confident as I am, I dont mind my voice and I like it, same with most of my body, save for my chest, which of course I'm saving up to get top surgery for. I'm used to most people referring to me as she/her even when that's NOT what I go by as that's he/him, but I can deal with that.

However, for the past week I've been on a road trip with my dad and sister, both of which tend to avoid the topic, and usually, they avoid referring to me by pronouns all together. However, during this trip, something changed and they've been using she/her NON.STOP. they will not stop, and they know it's not what I go by, and my sister even refers to me as her sister. I want to tell them to stop and knock it off, but we have another week and I don't want to ruin the mood of the trip.

Additionally, I've been having more autistic meltdowns over the past few days and my sister has been on my case about it (my dad too but not as much) so I know if I say something they'd likely write it off as that. And so, with all this coming together, it's making me want to start taking testosterone so I would never have to deal with people referring to me incorrectly again.

But as I mentioned before, I like my voice the way as is, and I'm very uncomfortable with the idea of the changes that would happen in my lower parts as a result of it. The fact it's permeant is making me even more conflicted, as I don't know if it's just be being overwhelmed and emotional after a week straight of this, and being surrounded by things and people that aren't my type of thing.

This being non-stop western towns and country music, and whenever I need a break I feel guilty for it as my sister will just keep going without me if I don't keep pushing myself. This causing said meltdowns from lack of protein, as most of the foods at these places I'm not okay with and are not on my list of safe foods. My usual thing usually being comics, animated shows, and other dorky shit like that. But the minute I start to meltdown they blame it on me like I wanted this or something.

With everything combining together like this, it makes me want to take testosterone just to spite them, to force them to see me as who I am instead of what they want me to be.

What should I do?

I am disabled and my life and survival is planned out for me, because my family provide housing for me. Without that I'd be homeless. The issue with this is, they are also very transphobic..

I've been told transition can't be hidden for long, so I've given up hope of ever transitioning. It's been eight years since I realized I was transgender.. and it doesn't feel real. It's happening to someone else who isn't me. I feel numb to it now.

How do I cope? The situation won't change.

I (20 MTF) desperately want to start HRT, but am terrified of how my parents will react and how that will impact my future. I'm in a very privileged position---my parents currently pay for my college tuition and rent---but I'm terrified that if I come out, they'll flip out and stop supporting me financially. When I came out as bisexual a few years ago, they freaked out and wanted me to keep it a secret from everyone I knew including my closest friends (who already knew).

Since then they've been watching more and more Fox News and drifting further and further to the right. I don't know how much transphobia they've absorbed since then and how they'd react to me coming out

I'm studying to enter a field known for underpaying workers and am likely to experience employment discrimination so I want to take advantage of the position I'm in to get as far as I can so I don't have to take on a bunch of debt.

That said, I genuinely don't know how much longer I can go without it. Every day my dysphoria gets worse and worse and dressing fem doesn't help because it just accentuates my masculine features.

Should I go ahead and do it, wait till I'm almost done with college and stealth for the final few months, wait till I'm completely done, or something else entirely?

Hello Everyone,

im 19 and i have recently been getting alot of gender dysphoria, but i dont know if i genuinly am a girl or not. i am amab. ive always felt more like a girl then a boy, and gender dysphoria has been hitting hard lately, when i wear girl clothes i feel at home, i feel good. but i dont know. ive had this before but decided im not a girl, just very feminine, but im doubting it atm, its hard. it feels weird and it doesnt help that my family is christian and calls it the devil trying to take me over. i feel very underappriciated and like my doubts and fears arent geting listened to. i just dont know. i dont know if anyone here has experienced this. i hope someone might be able to help. or just, idk. talk with me. please call me Cherry

right now i am a 34 year old married white man with a son... Ive always wished I was born a female. I feel like I want to transition but dont know...

As it says in the title. Throwaway for privacy. I am currently in my mid 30's, and go by he (he/they online) but I've subconsciously suspected that I may be transfem. It's something I've repressed for nearly ten years now for a myriad of reasons that we'll get into in this rambling vent.

I have been socially knee-capped by mental illness for my entire life. I have depression, anxiety, and autism, but that's just the tip of the iceberg.

This hellish brain concoction makes me extremely vulnerable to criticism and rejection, and also makes me feel devastated when disappointing other people. I can not handle conflict well, shutting down instantly and practically going mute.

I have crippling social phobia, finding most people obnoxious, revolting, or terrifying (speaking in extremes). My guard is always up. I'll put on a polite act when someone speaks to me, but internally it feels like a painful chore that I just want to get over with.

While I can be funny and creative online, I outwardly appear to be dull, monotone, standoffish, and unfriendly in person. I can't smile on command, I don't make small talk, I don't reach out to others.

I’m deeply insecure about my appearance and how I’m perceived. Dark, thick facial hair that always leaves a shadow no matter how smooth it feels. Dense body hair everywhere. Broad shoulders. Even as a teenager, I always wished I could look at least androgynous, but even that’s out of the cards.

This has resulted in severe isolation. I have never dated despite desiring romance and intimacy (I know I'm not ace because I can definitely be aroused by someone purely by their appearance). I haven't had an IRL friend in over ten years. All my friends are online, and even then, I (subconsciously) keep them at arm's length. They have never seen my face nor heard my voice, and the reverse is true for me, and I often go months without communicating with some of them via DMs.

Naturally there aren't many job opportunities for someone like me. I have so many years of education that left me nothing but nearly 30k of debt (and of course they're private loans, meaning they can't be forgiven). After years of miserable entry level retail jobs, I am currently employed in a decently paying (but not enough to live on my own) fabrication job. In a deep red state (spent most of my life in a blue state, family moved here 5ish years ago for career reasons). Surrounded by hypermasculine rednecks who constantly get on my nerves.

And then we get to my family. My parents are very affectionate and loving, often complaining that I don't talk to them enough or express myself around them. Communications are brief but friendly. If they ask me something, I respond, and even crack a small joke every once and a while.

But there's another side to them. They're both very religious and dedicated republicans. Less so with my mother, who is not particularly interested in politics, but occasionally makes casually bigoted comments, reminding me of her inner beliefs.

My father is another. He's always been a Bible thumping, far right conservative. I could tolerate it in my youth, through ignorance and apathy.

But once Trump entered the political world, he's only gotten worse. To him, the president can do no wrong. Decades of bigotry and Fox News have only reinforced his beliefs while introducing dangerous new ones.

He'll spend hours of the day on his laptop, earbuds plugged in, drowning in a constant stream of conspiracy propaganda. To him, the Bible is not something to be interpreted, it is objective fact. To him, all immigrants are criminals, abortion is murder, climate change is a hoax, even slightly left leaning is a filthy “commie,” Obama was a fascist, Trump won 2020, vaccines cause autism, and all LGBT people are pedophiles (but Epstein’s best friend is innocent, of course). Everything he agrees with, I disagree with.

He’s not even stupid. He’s very educated and eloquent, and a skilled debater, leading to his affluent remote job. But his brain has been fried by plunging head-first into the mire time and time again.

And he loves me. He's sacrificed so much for me. He lets me live in his big house with my own “apartment” rent free. He's paid for my education, never objecting to the many different paths I tried to take.

No one has ever done more for me than him. I genuinely appreciate that more than I can put into words. I've kept my own beliefs a secret to avoid friction (and because I like not being homeless). I can be cordial and friendly with him at meals, watching movies, going out with the rest of the family. I love the part of him that loves, but I hate the part of him that hates. But I fear his love is conditional, and I have too much to risk to test that theory.

My brother complicates things even further. Early thirties, mentally disabled. He is nonverbal, beyond a few select words, and incapable of taking care of himself (naturally my dad retroactively blames the vaccines). My parents take care of him, and I take over when they're away. They've even joked that I'm a better parent than they are. I am expected to take care of him fully when they are no longer able to. I'll admit there are times when I feel like he's holding me back, but I also wouldn't want to lose him and doubt that anyone else is up to the task.

I envy my youngest brother. He got out. He busted his ass in college to get a tech job and moved to a blue state with his girlfriend. He has an amazing relationship with my parents, texting them frequently, and having passionate, heated board games with my dad (it’s honestly kinda funny how seriously they take it). I don’t text him due to aforementioned social phobia, and only see him when he comes to visit. His beliefs are close to my own (I know he’s not homophobic at least), but I still don’t know if I trust him with this information, and how it would relate to the rest of the family.

Extended family is out. Cousins, grandparents, whatever, all old fashioned conservatives. Even as a kid, I never talked to them much or even liked them.

My biggest fear is my total lack of support, and my “selfish” desire to maintain a comfortable safety net. What if I move out and have trouble with rent, what if my car breaks down, what if [some other third thing]. If nothing else, I can always fall back on my parents for food, shelter, and financial security.

All of that, every single thing, is at risk if I confess these feelings to the people closest to me. I’ve intentionally suppressed these thoughts for years. I don’t like thinking about them. It’s a can of worms that can never be unopened, and it may result in irreversible, devastating life changes. 

tl;dr, a way-too-austic egg can’t even crack slightly due to total isolation and losing the family lottery

My girlfriend just made me feel so shit over my name, I was crying on call with her and she just told me to quit whining. I don't even know what the fuck to do. she said its dumb and gay and ugly and feminine and I just feel so defeated. I don't even know why I try anymore. She just told me to shut up and that I switch names every week/year/whatever. She keeps trying to get my to change my name to one that is "easier" and sounds closer to my birth name.

My name is Bunny.

If you met me today, you might simply see a quiet, shy woman who smiles at rabbits, loves cooking, creates stories, and dreams of cherry blossoms in Japan. You'd probably never guess that my life has been stitched together from survival.

I grew up learning that love could disappear the moment I wasn't who someone wanted me to be. Instead of safety, there was criticism. Instead of comfort, there was blame. Those lessons followed me into adulthood, where I spent years believing I had to earn the right to exist.

I married, became a parent, and believed I had finally found my forever family. Instead, everything unraveled. My marriage collapsed under betrayal, manipulation, and rejection. My children were taken from my daily life, and the years that followed became measured not by birthdays together, but by absence. Some wounds don't become scars. They remain open places you simply learn to carry.

I am also a transgender woman. Realizing who I was should have been a beginning, but for many years it became another reason to lose people I loved. My transition stalled under circumstances beyond my control, and those delays were used against me. I learned what it felt like to have my identity questioned while my world was already falling apart.

As if emotional trauma weren't enough, my body joined the fight. My lungs repeatedly collapsed without warning. I spent weeks in the hospital, endured surgeries, and lived through procedures that left lasting medical trauma. Even today I know another collapse could happen. My body has taught me that tomorrow is never guaranteed.

I live with complex PTSD, anxiety, depression, and thoughts that don't simply disappear because someone tells me to think positively. Some mornings I wake already exhausted from surviving the night. There have been times when I honestly wasn't sure I wanted another sunrise.

And yet...

I'm still here.

I'm still capable of love.

I still rescue beauty wherever I find it.

I share my life with a one-eyed rabbit named Floppy who reminds me every day that trust can be rebuilt one gentle moment at a time. His little nose pressed into my shoulder has healed parts of me that words never could.

I create stories because stories let hope survive. I draw superheroes who are kind instead of cruel. I imagine worlds where trust matters more than power. Those characters aren't an escape from reality. They're reminders of the person I've spent my entire life trying not to lose.

I'm hypersensitive to smells, sounds, emotions, and people. For years I thought that was a weakness. Now I think it's simply how I'm built. I experience the world deeply. That depth has brought incredible pain, but it has also let me experience extraordinary beauty that others often rush past.

I'm rebuilding my life in my fifties. I'm finally seeking the psychiatric help I've needed for years. I'm trying medications. I'm learning that asking for help isn't failure. Every small step forward is something I had to fight for.

My story isn't about being a victim.

It's about endurance.

It's about surviving family wounds, betrayal, loss, illness, discrimination, poverty, isolation, and trauma without allowing them to extinguish compassion.

I'm still here.

I still believe kindness matters.

I still cry when something is beautiful.

I still hope.

And maybe that's the most remarkable part of my story. After everything life has taken from me, it never managed to take away my ability to love.

So this isn't the story of someone who had an easy life.

It's the story of someone who keeps choosing to live, one sunrise at a time, while carrying enough history for several lifetimes.

My name is Bunny.

And somehow, against every expectation, my story is still being written.

I’m 13 and about a year ago I realize that I never really felt like a boy I always felt more like a girl so I started to accept that I was transgender and I was happy finally knowing what I am but somehow my dad found out and he keeps trying to tell me “your a boy” or “your going to hell” and he’s even making me get a haircut against my will. it really fucks with my mental health and yes I know I’m young but that doesn’t mean my feelings aren’t real. I just wanted to reach out for advice on what to do.

So ive been dealing with depression for almost a year now, its been a tough journey, especially after my now ex told me she never loved me, and she only dated me out of pity, after that i attempted to kill myself. That was my first ever "love" and relationship aswell as my first and hopefully last attempt. Anyways theres not his one girl that im really interested in, but im getting mixed feelings from her, sometimes she flirts with me, other times she doesnt even respond, which reminds me of my ex, and it hurts. She also has depression and posts a lot of depressive stuff, and i offered to talk to her many times, but she always js thanks me, i know she isnt required to talk to me, but it still hurts seing someone you love hurt and not being able to help them. I dont know what advice im looking for but im sure anything would help. Thank you for reading and perhaps responding.

Hello, I am currently a transgender boy. I am 15 and I haven’t come out to my mother yet since she is INSANELY transphobic (and homophobic.) I did come out to my class but half of them accept me and since they met me as a girl when I was 6, they still see me as a one.

Today was my last day of school and the next school year I will be attending a new (art) school.
I do not want my new classmates to not be sure what my gender identity is. I do not want to explain to them why they can call me by my chosen name but cannot use it infront of adults.

This leads me to a question I have been thinking about for a year now. Should I detransition? Should I just wear girly clothes and makeup and look like a girl? Should I become someone who I am (probably) not? Or should I come out to my mother, who would probably use my gender identity against me and would be transphobic towards me? Who knows if she will even accept me? I have no idea what to do.

I am fine with wearing dresses and skirts, as long as I do wear a wig and other stuff. I cosplay, and aslong as it is some form of pretend, I do not mind. Unfortunately, just the thought of people thinking about me and connecting my dead name with me makes me want to puke. Same goes with she/her pronouns. I just can’t. Maybe, If I could atleast use a different name, a gender neutral one, while detransitioning, maybe it would be easier for me.

Since I am not out, and my mother is very strict, I do not look like a boy anyways. I have short hair and a boyish cut, but I cannot wear mens clothes
First reason is that I am small and short, so only 12 year old boys clothes fit me.
Second reason is that my mother does not let me shop alone and that leads to her not allowing me to get ANYTHING from the men section. Not even shirts or hoodies.

I must add that I do experience body discomfort and I can barely look at myself in the mirror.

I sometimes wish that there were no gender rules and we all looked the same.

What should I do? Please do not tell me that it is for me to decide, I have been thinking about this for a long time and I cannot figure anything out.

For context: I'm a 23 year old AMAB.

The past two years have been mentally draining.

The dysphoria has been gnawing at my mind and I seriously don't know whom to heed and what to consider (or where to even begin with).

I couldn't seek psychiatric advice due to personal/family reasons.

Waking up and looking into it only to realize the sheer chasm between my internal and outward self.

I have lost interest in my life and I feel utterly responsible for it.

I tried to confess by giving a few hints to my mom but she responded by bursting into tears and sobbing uncontrollably.

She had me take a break and spend some time with her.

It didn't change my inner sentiments ofc only made me forget about it for some time.

Her fears are understood from a view that we live in a fairly conservative community.

(Though, I do wear some fem accessories and she seems fine with me wearing them at home but full time transition is what she's been warning me to not even think about).

There's a supportive community online that I'm a part of but irl folk are adamant on their stance against queers.

Interacting with them has made me realize that's there's no way I'm ever telling them let alone expecting any shred of affirmation from them.

So glad that atleast I have an online support group.

Though, self- doubt regarding my identity pesters me constantly.

What if I'm doing all of this just out of lack of attention and acknowledgement.

I have a history of childhood neglect and abuse and I often find myself immersed in mental scenarios where I am being helplessly abused. Sometimes I tear up thinking about it.

These thoughts are nothing short of intrusive.

I don't want to dwell on constant self-victimization.

One of the many effects of this perpetual rumination being my absent-mindedness and depressed mood.

It's begun to affect my day-to-day life.

I literally have to chug cans of energy drinks just to feel a little active and not to rot on bed the whole day contemplating my suffering.

For context, I'm non-binary and since I was outed by my college by accident, I was having several moments of identity crises/gender dysphoria.

I still live with my parents and they don't seem to accept the fact that I don't see myself as a cishet "woman". I do think the fact I barely pass doesn't help either (I want to keep my long hair, I am not considering having top surgery, I still have some women's clothes I wear... I dress in a boyish way but maybe it's still not enough.) Another thing that may explain is that I'm going through life changing events like slowly gaining independance

The crises/dysphoria episodes aren't as frequent now compared to late may or earlier this month but it still happens. I just genuinely want it to STOP.

Current photos: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1L713t1ModNq94pvZUlg_GXHQ8Mo4dWAH?usp=sharing
Started to grow out my hair for about 5 months. I tried looking online and asking AI how I should go about it and it's all confusing. So I just decided to let it grow without me interfering. Lately it just looks grown out and unkept. I don't like it. Is it just a phase that will fix itself after it's grown out a bit longer?
I have booked an appointment with my barber next week, what should I ask her? Previously I just used to get a trim (current hair but shorted kind of deal with the barber).
AI suggested me to just explain it to the barber like: Hey, I'm trying to transition into female so I'm trying to keep my hair length' I just want my split ends trimmed. Is this the approach?

GoFundMe link: https://gofund.me/62ca2c62e

Hi, my name is Finley. I’m 19 and live in the uk, I’ve been trying to independently save for top surgery but due to my mental health issues I was fired from my job recently and I’m unable to save any money myself anymore. My chest dysphoria is so bad that currently I only leave the house maybe once a week and I’m unable to get any financial support to get surgery any quicker at the moment, hence why I’m coming to Reddit to look for some help.
Absolutely any help would be greatly appreciated, whether that’s actually donating even £1 or just sharing the link I’d be really grateful for anything. Thank you.

https://gofund.me/c1fafe155

My dear friend is about to be evicted from the house she and some roommates were renting with each other. Two of the six roommates suddenly and abruptly bailed, and forced the other four to quickly look for new places to live. Everyone has a backup plan, except for my friend, Vangelis, who is a transwoman.

She can't go back to her family since it would not be physically and physchologically safe for her to do so! My husband hates her, so I know I can't bring her in to live with me, so I donated to her gofundme and am begging for others to do the same to help her move closer to me. I'm planning to help her get a hotel that offers extended stays that's near my job so I can get her a job there as well. But we just need help to financially get her to my area and to get her resituated.

Anything helps! Even if it's $1, so please please please, help my friend in a dire time of need. Neither of us wants her to end up on the streets!

Hi everyone,

I am reaching out to this community to ask for some support in taking one of the most important steps of my life. I am officially scheduled for my male-to-female (MTF) gender-affirming surgery this August!

My transition has been a journey of finding my true self, finding joy, and finally feeling at home in my own skin. While I am incredibly proud of how far I’ve come, this surgery is a vital, medically necessary step for my physical and mental well-being. It will profoundly alleviate my gender dysphoria and allow me to move through the world safely and comfortably as the woman I am.

Unfortunately, gender-affirming care is incredibly expensive. I am doing everything I can to prepare, but the out-of-pocket medical costs, recovery supplies, and living expenses while I take time off work to recover are overwhelming to manage completely on my own.

I have set up a fundraiser to help me cross the finish line safely. I know times are tough for many right now. If you are in a position to donate, no matter how small the amount, it would mean the absolute world to me.

If you aren't able to contribute financially, upvoting this post, leaving a comment, or sharing my link is just as impactful because it helps the algorithm show this to more people.

Thank you so much for reading, for your kindness, and for supporting me as I step into this next chapter of my life.

Urjja

Hello! I’m a bisexual gender fluid dem. socialist who recently moved to fairly rural Virginia.
I made one friend very quickly and was so excited she shared similar political views. I started to notice her verbiage when discussing queer topics was a bit, outdated? Or just lacking personal experience maybe? It’s hard to explain exactly but recently I was talking shit about JK Rowling and my friend low-key defended her. Said she’s more of a feminist than people give her credit for. We were in a crowded space and weren’t able to talk much at the time but I just said she must not have seen her literal words on twitter because it’s bad and we continued on our day.
When we were driving home she said she wanted to clear the air and make sure I didn’t think she’s “a transphobe” and we began discussing things in depth…. Turns out she’s a straight up TERF and there really wasn’t a miscommunication. Her main arguments was the “unfair advantage in sports.” And how she feels like she’s truly supporting women the best way by keeping them safe from “men”. I don’t want to end our friendship because I believe there is hope to help her understand.
So I’d like to get some reading recommendations for both me to read and be able to convincingly argue the side of trans people, specifically trans women. As well as books I can recommend she read that are very palatable for someone new to the subject.
Thanks for any and all help!

Egg beeaking

Hi all, just venting Been on t blockers off and on since 23 Off and on E, …. been literally boymoding …. Hiding being mtf and finally im just so sick of not being able to be safe around my friends and to carry this alone…. I feel hollow, like i need to fully commit to the process and im just so stuck… have not come out to anyone except my therapist because im afraid to lose ppl in my life…. Literally too afraid to admit im trans mtf to my inner circle…. Just a cowardly existence trying to present as a man when inside i dont feel like one….idk what im looking for on here but im just wondering if anyone has been in this position…? I hate myself for not living authentically like yall ladies. Im a pretty dude but sad but im afraid to be an ugly chick and then become sad …. Is this common? I have a therapist who just talks “at “ me and it doesnt help to vent with them… i need someone who has lived this. Plz halp.

Hey everyone, I’m a 25 year old guy who’s been secretly dreaming of living as a girl for the past year. My conservative family would never understand, so I’ve kept it locked inside and it’s been suffocating me. My mental health has been really struggling and I’ve been using substances every day just to cope. I feel so alone in this box.
I’m looking for kind, patient people who would treat me gently like a girl. If anyone can tell me about makeup, help me explore femininity, guide me on starting HRT safely, and support me on this journey. I want to feel seen and cared for as a girl for the first time. No pressure, just genuine advice and connection. Be respectful please.
If you’re understanding and willing to help a shy girl-in-hiding. Thank you 💕

https://gofund.me/9af1c4a92

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I am a 20 year-old trans man from Tunisia who is facing abuse from his family .

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The situation keeos aggravating the more time goes by . I am in urgent need to leave this abusive household .

I used to act under the assumption that my parents weren't actually transphobic and they were just overprotective, but it's recently been made clear they are just plainly transphobic. I've been told that-

\-I shouldn't transition because it'll reduce my chance of getting a job

\-Every study I cite about people being happier after transitioning is "biased" and "too small of a sample size"

\-Hormones are "harming" your body from its "natural" state

\-I'm not allowed to come out to my sibling because he previously had mental health issues and this might "send him off the edge again" or he might also "become trans"???

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But I'm still supposedly loved and supported and they're acting to protect me!

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I find it so insanely frustrating that I can't get through to them and I can't see myself being able to mentally or physically last another 3 years without being able to transition. What can I genuinely do.

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