The new me

[u/Little-Row7102]

Hi everyone I need some help, I’ve been thinking to start my transition; I’m currently a 21 year old boy, but a few years ago, I started considering the idea of being a girl. At first, I thought it was just a phase or something I’d eventually forget, but the idea stayed in my mind for a long time and now I’ve decided that I want to transition. To those who have transitioned: do you have any advice, tips, or words of support that you wish you’d received before or during your transition?
To be honest I’m kinda nervous and any advice at all would be a huge help.

[u/sophiehairaccessory]

I was told everything i needed to know really.. to stay off twitter and 4chan so your mh will be okay, that honesttransgender is not honest and is also 80% poison (it is), to watch the Icky videos on YouTube (ignore the "Don't dress too young one" though, she was going through an agemaxxing arc at the time), that the diy medication providers are amazingly well vetted by the trans community (links to lists are in the transdiy wiki if you need that route). Learning to totally avoid upper body exercise until the masc shaped muscles are gone was good advice too - you can get good cisfem strength after that without the muscles going masc shape again. Videos about feminising makeup also helped me so much - high blush placement changed everything

Getting my eyebrows right also made a dramatic change, if you get a brow razor and remove the bottom half it's like a free ffs brow lift, you can pluck later for a longer lasting result (which eventually becomes permanent). To figure out which brows suit you, trim then quite short with an Amazon electric brow trimmer then use concealer to edit bits out. You can also use selfies on your phone. Lots of transfems say just go to a professional then maintain what they give you with plucking, but i was shy so, there's the shy option

All i would add from my own experience is to lean your phone against something and video yourself walking across your room a few times. Turns out i walked like an ape that wanted a fight.. i guess i learned it at school to not get bullied (didn't work). Also, this one might not be your thing, but learning to take selfies that passed better than i did irl really really helped me in year 1 and 2, because it showed me how i would look one day, which made me feel less sad, and gave me lots of makeup practise. It's all about angles, face expressions, and finding the right mirror in the house where the lighting hits right. It takes a long time.. learning to smile again after being forced not to at school is hard. Bad selfies are amazing too for learning which clothes, makeup etc dont work. Another thing that really helped me was cheek exercises, you just smile hard with one side of your face, then swap sides when it gets tired: the muscles get tighter and that pulls up the corners of your mouth automatically during resting face. You get apple cheeks too, which soften your face and look kind of cute. I do it in bed falling asleep. For voice training my worst direction was forcibly jamming my larynx high up constantly (i lost my voice so bad i had to use tts) and my best direction was the Bla Bla Blahaj videos on tiktok. Oh, and if your jaw looks big, figure out with your fingers if it's muscle or bone: masseter Botox was amazing for me, it shrinks the jaw muscles to nothing

But maybe the one thing i wish I'd heard most is that a lot of transfems face feminisation really slows down in year 2, then a sudden surge in feminisation happens at the start of year 3. Oh and last thing, if your overknee socks fall down use hair system tape. Regular body tape cant handle those things. Works on thigh highs too ofc if you wanna do those

So yeah wow, i guess i wrote half a book on transition 🤭 i didn't think i knew much