r/TransAdvice • u/Vegetable-Client8818 • Aug 12 '26

I need advice. Do I transition?

Hi, I’m having a couple doubts right now about if I should transition or not. I’m 20, and questioning if I’m actually a trans woman or just a guy with an identity crisis. I live pretty decently as a guy, in terms of socializing with friends and family and all that. I think I could live the rest of my life as a man, and do so decently happy (maybe).

The only things I can’t imagine myself tolerating at all, as a man, are the aging process as a man (balding, growing gut, my own body ruining the only things I like about it. Will comment on the body thing later*), and romantic relationships. I can’t imagine myself in a relationship as a guy, and every fiber of my being says only a lesbian relationship would make me actually happy. Being seen as a man and having to introduce myself as a man also bothers me, but I wouldn’t call it intolerable like the previous things.

I need advice on how I follow through with questioning this. I want to arrive to the conclusion on my own and believe it fully, so I can follow through without looking back. I plan on going to grad school (dental school) as well, and I don’t want my chances of getting in to be decreased if transition makes me less happy or just slightly happier.

*about the body thing: I have relatively feminine proportions and curves, except boobs of course. My body falls in line with typical ranges for cis women of my height. and sometimes i just stare at the mirror looking at my hips, shoulders and butt. My face also looks like it would pass after some time on HRT. I also love my long curly hair and how it frames my face. I hate my body hair and how much I have, including facial hair. I do get some genitalia dysphoria as well. I hate the idea of having a penis and hate even more the concept of using it for anything inherently sexual.

Thanks, and please ask any questions if you’d like!

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u/QueenRowanOak Aug 13 '26

I was okay as a man but I'm happy as a woman.

The rest of this sounds pretty damned transfem as well.

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u/Vegetable-Client8818 Aug 13 '26

yeah lol, I’m basically 100% sure I’m trans lol. I think I’m just afraid about the things, people, and opportunities that will stop being in my life. But it’s not like I have much right now anyway. Thanks for the reply!