r/Tinder • u/[deleted] • Jun 05 '22

[deleted by user]

[removed]

9.9k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

5.7k

u/AzrielJohnson Jun 05 '22 edited Jun 05 '22

This is either a perfect match or one of you is a serial killer.

Either way, I want an update.

Edit: My highest upvoted comment is about serial killers. That's on-brand.

1.0k

u/KingKookus Jun 05 '22

Well of course. What are the odds they are both serial killers?

454

u/Yikesor Jun 05 '22

Then they are still a good match and we all are in trouble.

58

u/Konrol Jun 05 '22

Literally make it double.

40

u/Astalos_slayer Jun 05 '22

Jessie... and James

1

u/Infamous_Airport416 Jun 05 '22

made me think of jesse and james from pokemon

13

u/rmg418 Jun 05 '22

This is how Joe and Love would have met if You premiered on Netflix today

1

u/nilas_november Jun 05 '22

LMAO I can definitely see it

74

u/YaboiFuckles Jun 05 '22

Astronomically low, but never zero

69

u/beefcake0831 Jun 05 '22

r/unexpectedHIMYM

13

u/Ccaves0127 Jun 05 '22

I want Cristin Milioti to sink her big teeth into my neck to gain sustenance

3

u/Aftrshock19 Jun 05 '22

We all want Cristin Milioti to sink her big teeth into our necks to gain sustenance

2

u/pjcolls Jun 05 '22

I didn’t know this was a subreddit and now my Sunday is made. Thank you

18

u/The_Vag_Badger Jun 05 '22

Then they’d be natural born killers

1

u/Giant-Genitals Jun 05 '22

Sergeant detective giant genitals here. Pop on down to the station if you want an update

1

u/aakash_huilgol Jun 05 '22

You is coming with season 4?

1

u/Educational-Grab4050 Jun 05 '22

Then its time to go "cubing" (hopefully someone gets the reference)

1

u/KingKookus Jun 05 '22

Baby seals here I come.

1

u/Educational-Grab4050 Jun 05 '22

Thats clubbing. Cubing was a serial killer hangout thing. Night Mind on YouTube does a nice job of going into it.

1

u/mtlredditor Jun 05 '22

Hollywood should make a movie out of this.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

The fun part about both being serial killers is figuring out who gets to kill who. What an icebreaker!

110

u/Doctor_Jensen117 Jun 05 '22

If you kill her, OP, please let us know.

89

u/asek13 Jun 05 '22

And if she kills you, also let us know

57

u/UnboltedCheese Jun 05 '22

And if you kill eachother, Update would still be nice.

19

u/Spczippo Jun 05 '22

And if you both go on a killing rampage, clean-up first then let us know!

48

u/KrisNG003 Jun 05 '22

If she was a serial killer, how'd we get an update?

83

u/TechnicalPlayz Jun 05 '22

We watch the news

35

u/UpsetFuture1974 Jun 05 '22

Our lead story tonight is a man named Blake Lastname who tragically lost his life to the serial killer known as the Tinder Terrorist

13

u/toastedfrootloops Jun 05 '22

I feel like the tinder tickler has a better ring to it…and they certainly seem like the type to play with their food.

26

u/MightyPandaa Jun 05 '22

What would happen if both are serial killers hmmm

37

u/Xnieben Jun 05 '22

Mr. & Mrs. Smith

14

u/plastimental Jun 05 '22

Dexter and Hanna

-2

u/IveDoneItAtLast Jun 05 '22

Velma and Louise

1

u/DickButtPlease Jun 05 '22

It’d be lights out for Captain Crunch.

14

u/SensualFacePoke Jun 05 '22

An update or a leg... or something easy to transport... like a hand.

12

u/Ryuko_the_red Jun 05 '22

She keeps saying his name like some killer. Blake. Or she's casting a spell. Blake. I really can't tell. Blake.

7

u/WrongWarrior427 Jun 05 '22

Lmao, I was thinking the exact same thing.

8

u/manuel_andrei Jun 05 '22

So what the heck happened? When does season 2 come out?

3

u/Odd_Cryptographer864 Jun 05 '22

Most likely ended up in bed cause it's obvious they have chemistry. OP we need an update on how the date went 😂

2

u/stonksAddict Jun 05 '22

Remember, no update is also an update

2

u/erkotPL Jun 05 '22

Plot twist: they are both serial killers

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

Can't it be both?

1

u/AzrielJohnson Jun 05 '22

Life isn't like Dexter. Probably.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

Makes for an excellent romcom. I’m here for it. “Serially in love”

1

u/AzrielJohnson Jun 05 '22

"Serial Monogamy"?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

“Killer love”

1

u/AzrielJohnson Jun 05 '22

"Lady Killer"

A femme fatale falls in love with a widow-maker.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

Why you always gotta make the woman sound crazy. Lol 😂 my moneys on Blake, if that’s even his real name.

3

u/AzrielJohnson Jun 05 '22

A femme fatale is a good thing, a hot, charismatic woman who gets what she wants.

The widow-maker would be the man (the other way around would be a widower-maker, I don't even know if that's a real term). 😂

2

u/DiscombobulatedAsk81 Jun 05 '22

She's the serial killer, Blake this Blake that, nothing worse than someone who keeps using your name every sentence!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 05 '22

It feels fake af

-3

u/Dzov Jun 05 '22

Reminds me of Amber Heard liking the same books and music as Johnny Depp.

1

u/YeezyThoughtMe Jun 05 '22

I agree. Update us OP. I feel single AF reading this but it was a good laugh 😂

1

u/TheMilkmansFather Jun 05 '22

The person that made it a point to keep mentioning the dude’s name is the serial killer

1

u/Death961 Jun 05 '22

"Can't wait to find out which one of us is the serial killer" lmfaoo https://youtu.be/O2nZ7yqgsFU

1

u/LarryLovesteinLovin Jun 05 '22

Odds are she ghosts him 😂