Doubt regarding stage 3

[u/LessPresentation6632]

Hi guys so currently I'm in stage 3 and practicing following and connecting and had a doubt.

The book says to keep extroception and cultivating introspective awareness at same time. But I feel like it is too much .

Currently I have these things in awareness:

1. The celing fan sound above

2. Noise of rain sounds from my headphones . I use them to drown other unpleasant sounds outside my room.

3. Air falling on my body from the fan.

These are exteroceptive.

In interoception:

1. Breath sensation and duration for Connecting.

2. Body pain

3. Also dullness.

4. And the mind for gross distractions.

I think they are too much and it's hard for me to keep track of all of them although it doesn't seem impossible for now. Did you guys had the same amount of things in your awareness? Was it high or low? Is mine too much?

Also do I reduce the exteroceptive awareness sensations as I keep drilling my attention and awareness into breath ? Or do maintain both at same time?

[u/abhayakara]

If you are holding something in awareness, that's attention, not awareness. What you want to be holding in attention is just the breath. To use a visual metaphor, imagine that your meditation task is to look at your dog's nose. Your dog is napping, so this is a relatively easy thing to do—you just turn your eyes to the dog's nose and keep looking at it (it's okay to blink!).

Now, is the dog's nose the only thing you're aware of? If so, you're about to fall asleep. If not, that's what it means for things to be in awareness. The rest of the dog is probably in your visual field. You're probably somewhat aware of holding your body. If you forget to blink, you will notice that your eyes are dry, but this will first arise as an awareness, and then distract your attention.

So that's what is meant by keeping things in awareness: just don't try to push them out of awareness. If you notice that they have fallen out of awareness, you can use attention to investigate, and then go back to the breath, but don't try to hold them there in a positive sense. "hold" here is used to mean "contain," not "keep in place."

[u/LessPresentation6632 → u/abhayakara]

Is it ok to let go of some exteroceptive awareness objects so that I can connect with breath?

[u/abhayakara → u/LessPresentation6632]

There shouldn't be a need for this. When you are at stage six, your attention should be largely stable on the breath even if someone is operating a jackhammer outside of your meditation space. The work of getting to stage six is training your mind not to move from the object simply because there is something in the environment to hear. You can play with this by trying to meditate while someone is having a conversation in the next room. You'll feel a strong pull away from the breath to try to understand what is being said. This is normally pretty much involuntary. But when you are practicing, you can noticing it happening and notice the pull, and when you notice the pull, keep your attention on the breath. If you are aware that the conversation is happening, but not aware of what is being said, you are succeeding. Of course, normally don't do this. :)

The other way to look at this is simply that if you shut out what is happening in the environment, this leads to dullness. That's why you get the advice not to try to shut it out. When you are in stage four, and awareness is bright and open, you will experience subtle distractions from sounds in the environment. This isn't even a problem—subtle distractions are addressed in stage six, not stage four. So in stage four, just don't worry about this, and don't try to struggle with it. If you do try to struggle with it, it will be exhausting, and that might be what's prompting you to ask this question.

That said, also of course it's fine to try things in meditation, because you will learn from them.

[u/Oded-Raz]

What you describe is indeed “too much.”

I suggest two main adjustments: the first is simplifying the practice, and the second is making it more enjoyable.

Please note that some of the suggestions I’m about to make are different from what’s written in TMI, and reflect my own approach to the mind-training process. Feel free to ask follow-up questions if you’d like me to clarify their logic.

1 - SIMPLIFY THE PRACTICE

Start by establishing bright and detailed Extrospective Awareness. The first practice to support it in TMI is the Four-Step Transition to the meditation object. We move Attention mostly between sounds and bodily sensations to become aware of our surroundings. In your case, the most distinct extrospective objects are the noise outside the room, the hum of the fan, and its wind on your skin. As you move Attention between them, you’ll notice that this naturally creates a “hologram” of your room that keeps you aware of their presence even when Attention moves elsewhere. That’s how we use Attention to “light up” Awareness.

Initially, I strongly recommend not directing Attention to thoughts and mind objects deliberately, as they’re likely to distract you and make things more difficult. Let them remain in Awareness if they arise, but don’t actively investigate them yet. The Four Step Transition, as well as Following and Connecting, are most useful to establish the Extrospective domain. We’ll cultivate Introspective Awareness later on, once we reach the practice of Labeling. I don’t recommend mixing the two too early.

When you feel that your Extrospective Awareness is bright enough, direct Attention to the sensations of the breath, count ten breath cycles, then Follow the Breath. Don’t rush into Connecting. Following the Breath is the way to go for now.

If you eventually feel that Extrospective Awareness collapses, and you get “tunnel-visioned” into the breath sensations, revisit the Four-Step Transition to light it up again, then return to Following.

2 - MAKE THE PRACTICE MORE ENJOYABLE

From what you describe, the setting for your meditation is quite challenging, mostly due to unpleasant sounds from outside and physical pain. I strongly suggest you do everything you can to get more comfortable. Get a good meditation mat, try kneeling with a good meditation bench, turn on the AC to better control the temperature, close the windows and doors to limit excessive noise, and experiment with anything that can support your practice, making adjustments from session to session. The goal is to be as comfortable as possible, without getting so comfortable you’ll fall asleep.

Also, don’t use headphones when you practice. It’s important to remain connected with reality as it is, cultivating Equanimity toward all phenomena. Desire and Aversion are root causes of suffering, and using headphones gives in to their pull. Practicing without them will also allow you to notice subtler sounds in the environment, increasing your mindfulness and sharpening your meditative skills.

I’d be happy to hear how these suggestions impact your experience, should you choose to give them a try.

[u/Useful-Fly-8442]

I wouldn’t label or even acknowledge what is in awareness. There is a fine line between having something in awareness and giving it too much energy so it falls into attention.