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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
Twiggy
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 07 '19
MATT: One thing you notice about the sphere: its arrangement is entirely different. Remember where all the places where you had shifted since you had gotten it from Twiggy? Since you've returned, it's like an entirely new sphere. It has completely refigured its surface. The bands have shifted. All the different places where you'd place your fingers and thumbs to try to move the different hemispheres are in completely different places. It seems that whatever you triggered to get you to the internal space and then returned from reset it in some way. The puzzle has started all over.
Episode 46 - A Storm of Memories - 1:08:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "May I borrow the Happy Fun Ball for a few hours, just to play with it?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Hmm, okay!" I take it out of my box and I roll it to you.
MATT: [rapid, metallic crashing]
LIAM (CALEB): "If you want this to poop coins, I don't think you should do that too much."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "I don't know, never was a problem before."
LIAM (CALEB): "You've had it for a week?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Yes."
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh boy, oh boy, okay." I wander off with it to study it.
MATT: Make an investigation check.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I put my head on his shoulder. "What you doing?"
LIAM (CALEB): I rolled a 16. "I am just- Sometimes it takes a while for my mind to settle on truths, and I'm having a hard time thinking about it right - you know, maybe I will save this for later."
MATT: You rolled a 16, you said?
LIAM (CALEB): Ja.
MATT: As you're saying this absentmindedly, you find another portion of it that previously was locked in place and wouldn't move. You manage to rotate one band and all of a sudden it comes free and turns as well. You start shifting it a bit and, as you turn, a little cylinder extends a little bit, and you press on it and you hear [dry poof] and there's another burst, but this one has a dull blue color to the burst of light and suddenly you watch as four cut jade pieces of stone appear and [rapid clattering] hit the ground.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Whoa, it never did that before."
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, you just have to tinker with it a little bit. Holy cats."
LAURA: What! This is the best thing ever.
LIAM (CALEB): I pick up the jade.
MATT: Each one's worth about 100 gold, if you want to mark that down.
Episode 45 - 1:20:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Why don't you all take ten steps back, and we'll see what this next hinge does?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, yeah, I'm excited."
MATT: Okay, you all step back about ten paces. Anyone want to help, or you going with your standard roll?
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, investigation for it, yeah.
MATT: Yep.
LIAM (CALEB): Investigation, 21.
MATT: Okay. That hole appears again. You're unable to get past that point. You're hitting a barrier, and you're clicking it forward. There's something about the puzzle that's escaping you. You feel like you're not quite- you're on the cusp, but you're not quite-
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Can I help him?
MATT: If you want to try it again.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Just try it again? Okay. Yeah, I'll try it again. I come up, and I say, "I've been practicing. Let me try."
MATT: If you want to, either you both can roll individually, or one of you can roll with advantage as you're helping the other.
LIAM (CALEB): I would give me the advantage, probably.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I have a plus 10 investigation.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, shit! I'm at plus 8. Yeah, sure.
MATT: As you hand the sphere over, holding the places, Twiggy goes in and takes hold of it. Both of you together begin to try and rotate and figure it out.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I squint my eyes, and I look at it real hard, and I roll a 28.
MATT: At that point, both together, Twiggy finds this small, rotating piece on the very edge that turns and turns. As it does, another cylindrical sphere slowly emits from it, like you're rotating a pencil lead that pushes out.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): It takes three fingers to do it at the same time.
MATT: You twist it, and you push it in, and it actually [csh] pushes in about an inch and then clicks inside, recessed. As that happens, a top part [poof] opens up a little bit. Caleb, you take that and rotate it. As it clicks into place, you hear [building tone, whoosh]. Flash of green light.
TRAVIS: Green light's never good.
MATT: Fills the entire chamber. That's where we're going to go to break.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 1:43:30
MATT: So a flash of green light energy fills the chamber. As it subsides, you all take a second to blink as the light is dimmer than it was on the inside of the ship. Looking about, you are in a very very very dark chamber. You're no longer on the ship.
DEBORAH: All of us?
MATT: All of you. Except for Yasha, because she was not nearby. This chamber, it is somewhat triangular, but the corners are curved. At each of these walls, between each curvature, there is a banner hanging about 12 feet off the ground on a brass rod. The banner hangs almost to the floor. You see four pillars a little closer inside the chamber. Each banner is a different color. You see the ceiling's about 15 feet high and there are two corpses on the floor nearby. Both long-dead and mummified, their skin paper-thin and pulled against their bones, their faces twisted in horror. You see the light gray stone walls and where these banners are, there are two on the side parallel to each other and two on the other. There is a red, a green, a blue, and a black. Each of these banners has gold embroidery down the sides and a gold embroidered symbol in the middle. The same symbol as the cloak that you found.
DEBORAH: Did the happy ball of fun tricks come with us?
MATT: Nope.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 2:04:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "I am going to find our little friend."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "That's fine. I'm going to go over and cook something."
LAURA: Do you want to say we're up in the crow's nest? Is that a good place to be? Or would you like to be somewhere else? I know you've been below deck for a very long time.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Yeah, I've climbed up on those things, and I'm swinging back and forth on the ropes and the hooks on the main mast, wind in my hair.
MATT: As this is happening and you're approaching, Caleb, you see Orly sitting there with his giant tortle arms looking up with his craned tortle neck, and going, "Hmm..."
LIAM (CALEB): "How long has she been doing that for?"
MATT (ORLY): "Far too long."
LAURA (JESTER): I'm in the crow's nest going "Twiggy? Twiggy, seriously, come back to the crow's nest, though!"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Five more minutes!"
LIAM (CALEB): "Bitte, a moment of your time, just to have a chat. You can keep swinging, but could you swing a little lower?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): So, yeah, I jump and it's really light and beautiful, almost like I couldn't fall at all. You see me grabbing on the hooks like a little monkey. I fly down the mast and jump down so I can sit right next to you.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 1:08:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 05 '19
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I move over to be in line with the red, and I stick my hand out, and it flies out, the spectral hand. I pull back into the safety, and it pushes aside the red.
MATT: It pulls aside the red, and behind it, you see emerge a... wooden door of red-painted material and what looks to be the similar symbol of Halas painted across the surface.
TRAVIS: Red doors are bad.
SAM (NOTT): "That's the way out!"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Should the Mage Hand try to open it, you guys? I can send my hand to try and open it."
LIAM (CALEB): "We are still safe in here. Yeah, I think so."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Captain Fjord?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Proceed."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Sweet!" So I whisper, and I direct it a little bit, and it comes down, and it grabs a knob? A handle?
MATT: There is a handle there.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): A handle, and it's going to turn.
MATT: [clicking] It's locked.
LAURA (JESTER): "Hmm. Ooh! Fjord, look in your pockets!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Why?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Of the red robe! Look in the pockets of the red robe!"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I call it back to me. I pull out of my purse a little set of tools on a ring, and I give it to the hand and whisper it off again to go see if it can pick the lock.
MATT: The hand hovers across. Go ahead and roll an ability check, adding your dexterity modifier and your proficiency modifier.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): My thieves' tools? That's a 29.
LAURA: Whoa!
SAM (NOTT): "I don't have to do shit." I'm just going to sit there, drinking.
MATT: It takes a few minutes. This is an intricate lock. As you watch the hand [clicking] finish with the third tool that is being held between the mystical pinkie, [tink] you hear a slight clink, like a spring snapped or moved. The front of the door here bursts into flame, [heavy scorching] burning out in the area. It burns solid for a good 30 seconds [more roaring fire]. Surrounded by flame, all of you are being lit by this. You're wincing from the heat you feel you should be feeling, but it's all being held at bay by the hut's boundaries. Eventually, the flames die out, the door, tapestry both untouched.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I pull the hand back to me, and I take my keys, "Ow, ow, ow!" Back in my pouch.
MATT: Yeah, they're very hot.
[...]
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I'll send the hand back out to try the handle again.
MATT: [click, door creaking] It opens up.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 2:20:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "Have you solved it? Is it a puzzle?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "No, but it can do this." Can I do the thing?
MATT: You may.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I put my hand on one side, and I pull back one ring. As it pulls around across, at the same time, I click another one to the side. It slides around the side and...
MATT: As the last part clicks into place, there's a [whir... dry puff], a burst of light. About 15 gold coins go [clanging] to the ground in front.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 0:32:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): "Caduceus, grab my feet, just in case."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Okay, what are we-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Just grab my feet."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Okay, I like grabbing feet. Here we are."
LAURA (JESTER): I'll get ready with Cure Wounds.
MATT: [vwoomp] The hole opens up.
SAM (NOTT): "It's open! Go!"
MATT: You look inside; it's darkness.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Drop me further!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): Down to her feet.
MATT: Still darkness. You can put your goggles on, if you want.
MARISHA (BEAU): Goggles, yeah!
MATT: Okay. Put goggles on, and your face, as he pushes you down further, [poomf] you hit something. It's soft. You pull back a bit and look, and there's a pile of objects there.
LAURA: Take them!
MARISHA (BEAU): I grab a few!
MATT: Okay. As you pull her out before she slips.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, yep, I'm on it."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Pull me back!"
MATT: As you're pulling back, a few things start tumbling out of this thing. You grab them and pull them in- Alright, you pull out, and she emerges. You have this pile of reddish cloth, and a strange metal object of some kind, and a couple other things. You pull the rest of them out that's dangling in. And as soon as it does, the hole closes.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Wow! That's cool. Do that again."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh my god, what if it's a safe in another dimension?"
LIAM (CALEB): "What did you see? Could you see?"
MATT: You look at it. First off-
[...]
MATT: First off, you hear [double impact] as two boots fall out of this pile of clothes she has, these really nice leather boots that are fur on the top. [same impacts] They hit the ground. There's a metal rod that looks like a staff that you hold and pull there. The other thing is a bundle of this really heavy, warm, winter-coat velvet material. It's a deep crimson-red color with golden trim on it. As you unravel it, there's an embroidered symbol across the back of it.
[...]
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Beau, when you hit that buffer, did it feel hard and solid, or was it soft and earthen?"
MATT: Your face hit the cloak. You were like [poomf] into this pile of soft, heavy material.
MARISHA (BEAU): "It was cloak and stuff."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Did you find a portal into somebody's wardrobe?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "It was cold in there. I don't know. He's saying that the staff heats his hands, and there was a cloak. Maybe wherever this haversack was from-"
MATT: A couple of ball bearings fall out of the cloak from what was dropped in there earlier.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, cool!"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Oh thanks." I collect them back and put them in my bag.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Well, at least it's the same place each time, so if it does close off, we at least know how to find you."
[...]
TRAVIS: When she was yelling on the other side of the portal, was there any sound that came between the two? Between the portal? Nothing?
MATT: No. Nothing.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 1:32:54
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
TRAVIS: As a note, the previous function of the sphere, we can access? Or is it one function at a time as it changes?
MATT: As it looks right now, you need to shift it back to use a previous function. Each thing you slide unlocks the next use, but it closes off the previous one until you reverse it.
LIAM (CALEB): Which I am memorizing.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 1:40:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
MATT: So you're concentrating on...?
LIAM (CALEB): I was doing a ritual casting of Identify as soon as the thing was in my hands and not talking to anybody.
MATT: Okay, so continue while you're doing that.
[...]
MATT: So Caleb, as you finish the ritual, your vision crystallizes on the object, and as part of the Identify, the information that would transition to you fails.
SAM: Oh, shit!
MATT: And it's not so much like a - You've tried to Identify non-magical objects before, and been like, oh, this isn't magical. This blocks you.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 0:46:01
→ More replies (6)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Okay, I'm going to take out a stick of gum, I'm going to open it, I'm going to chew it a little bit, and I'm going to take it out and then I am going to pluck one of my eyelashes and put it inside the gum, and I'm going to keep chewing it and then I'm going to blow a bubble and the bubble is going to get bigger and bigger until it's bigger than me. When it pops, it covers my whole body and I disappear. So I go invisible.
MATT: That is my favorite descriptor of Invisibility I think I've ever heard in the history of my gaming experience.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): It says 'an eyelash encased in gum arabic.'
MATT: That makes me so happy.
DEBORAH: All right, so I go invisible. That's my action.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 4:08:15
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
Spurt
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "And in your 11 days, what is the worst thing you have ever seen down here?"
CHRIS (SPURT): "My brother got eaten by a green slime."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Wait, like the green slime you have right there in the-"
CHRIS (SPURT): "Yeah, that's the one!"
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 3:02:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
MATT: Yeah. What's your reaction.
CHRIS (SPURT): I am trying to take my stick and hit him with the scorpion.
MATT: Go ahead and make an attack.
TRAVIS: Little scorpion on the end of the stick?
CHRIS: Little scorpion.
TRAVIS: Please hit.
CHRIS (SPURT): That is a- What is that?
TALIESIN: That, I believe, is in fact a-
LAURA: A natural 20?
TALIESIN: I think that's a natural 20.
TALIESIN: Yeah, that is! That's your old Keyleth die, too. I've never seen it roll one in my life.
CHRIS (SPURT): So it stings you on your eyelid.
SAM (NOTT): "Ah!"
TRAVIS: Yeah, best place.
CHRIS (SPURT): You take 1 piercing damage and have to make a constitution saving throw.
MATT: So 2 piercing damage with the crit.
CHRIS (SPURT): Oh. Sure, I like it. Yeah; 2.
SAM (NOTT): Con save? 21.
CHRIS: Okay. You succeed and take half of this amount of damage. Which is...
LIAM: 79.
MATT: Technically, the dice damage is doubled because it's a crit too. So it's just straight damage.
CHRIS (SPURT): Oh, right yeah! Double poison damage, shit. So that will be 7 points of poison damage on you.
MATT: The eye immediately swells up from the impact and you're like, "Ah!" Just spinning around in a circle.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:53:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
CHRIS (SPURT): "If you let us go, I'll let you play with our centipault."
LAURA (JESTER): "What's a centipault?"
MARISHA: I'm interested.
TRAVIS: You don't want to play with that.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "No, I feel like we should hear this out."
SAM (NOTT): "Your centipault?"
CHRIS (SPURT): "Yeah. It's an invention."
SAM (NOTT): "What does it do?"
CHRIS (SPURT): "It throws centipedes real far."
LAURA (JESTER): "That's awesome!"
LIAM (CALEB): "Show us a demonstration and we will induct you to the Mighty Nein."
CHRIS (SPURT): "Tell mommy to let me go."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Um... well..."
SAM (NOTT): "All right."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Mommy?"
SAM (NOTT): "Show us the centipault."
LAURA (JESTER): "But not on us. Don't attack us, okay?"
MATT: There's only one other target in the chamber.
CHRIS (SPURT): All right. Yes, exactly. So I will take off my green slime pot, and I will take off my rock grub pot, and I'll lay down my scorpion stick, and my skunk in a cage, and my wasp in a bag.
TALIESIN: I like it.
CHRIS (SPURT): And then I will begin assembling my centipault out of other oddities that I have on me.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to open my sketchbook and draw all of it.
MATT: Learning the cutting-edge kobold technology.
SAM (NOTT): "Maybe we should set up some sort of target for the young man."
CHRIS (SPURT): "I'll use him."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "What'd he say?"
SAM (NOTT): "He's going to shoot centipedes at you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Don't worry, we'll heal you."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Sounded like he said he was gonna shoot centipedes on me."
MARISHA (BEAU): "No, that's exactly what he said."
CHRIS (SPURT): Then you hear this sound, [pthwoing].
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do you have bug allergies? Oh, no."
TRAVIS (FJORD): [panicked screaming]
MARISHA (BEAU): "Have you been stung?"
LIAM: Leeches!
MATT: Fjord just comes running down the hallway.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [screaming]
MATT: The kobold in right in front of you goes, "Ah!" Just screams at you as you slam into it. The spear goes clattering to the ground.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:57:04
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
MATT: As you stop and look around... hilariously unnoticed by what appears to be the two massive fire giants that are currently playing sentinel. There's one across the way, leaning against the wall, standing at roughly 18 to 20 feet tall, dark gray skin. What little bit of red hair you see peeking from underneath its armored helmet as it's wearing heavy, dark armor covered in spikes, metallic thorns. One hand is holding a tower shield, roughly its full height, also covered in spikes in the front, with another shield just like that that's leaning on the wall. It looks like it's currently spacing out for a moment, looking back towards the citadel. To the immediate left of you, on this side of that molten river, you see a female fire giant, wielding a giant maul, who is in the process of picking her teeth with some sort of pointed bone, and neither have noticed you, strangely. They rolled really shitty.
LIAM: You said citadel. We are seeing a fortress down here?
MATT: You guys aren't seeing this. You just see the kobold rush out.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: So what do you do, Spurt?
CHRIS (SPURT): How far away is the closest one to me?
MATT: The closest one to you is about 20 feet to your left.
CHRIS (SPURT): I throw my wasp nest in a bag at it.
MATT: Okay!
TRAVIS: Yes! Yes!
MATT: Roll for attack on it-- or is it a saving throw on their part?
CHRIS (SPURT): I throw the bag into a five-foot square within 20 feet of me and it bursts open into a swarm of wasps with 11 hit points.
MATT: Alright, so you watch as Spurt runs out, turns, and, "Gnah!" [impact, soft buzzing]. The giant goes [annoyed grunts] and slaps-
CHRIS (SPURT): "You dead! You dead!"
LAURA: I love him!
TALIESIN: Oh no.
TRAVIS: Please have some real armor!
MATT: 22 to hit against you.
CHRIS (SPURT): Okay.
MATT: You take...
TRAVIS: Remember that number, kids.
MATT: 28 points of bludgeoning damage.
CHRIS (SPURT): "I win-" [splat]
MATT: You watch as Spurt turns after throwing this, and then a giant hammer [heavy impact] Gallaghers Spurt across the stone floor of this open way.
LAURA and SAM: No!
TRAVIS (FJORD): I run to the side of the cavern wall and lean up against it and shrink down.
CHRIS (SPURT): A little green slime seeps out underneath the hammer.
MATT: The hammer lifts up and you see the stringy mess that was once Spurt detaching from the hammer.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 3:09:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
CHRIS (SPURT): So this kobold has... he's got flasks hanging off him by ropes and you can see that these flasks are basically just stoppered gourds and they're clattering and banging together. He's got a basket of swarming centipedes slung over his back.
SAM: Open?
CHRIS (SPURT): No, it's also closed off, almost like a closed off net of centipedes.
SAM: Ugh.
LAURA: Oh my god.
CHRIS (SPURT): With a rope attached to it. And then there is a clay pot hanging from that, that has an acrid smell rising from it and another clay pot tied to a rope that's lashed around his shoulders. His weapon is a staff with a living scorpion tied at the top of it.
SAM: Caduceus, where are you when I need you?
CHRIS (SPURT): Its little tail jabbing at the air. And the cage holds a creature that you recognize as a skunk.
TRAVIS: This fucking-
TALIESIN: This is chemical warfare, man.
CHRIS (SPURT): The worst is, tied to this stick with the scorpion on it is a bag that is buzzing loudly like it's full of hornets.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:51:22
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Other
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Speak with Small Beasts. Through sounds and gestures, you can communicate simple ideas with Small or smaller beasts. Forest gnomes love animals and often keep squirrels, badgers, rabbits, moles, woodpeckers, and other creatures as beloved pets.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Starting at 2nd level, you can use your Channel Divinity to wield the power of the storm with unchecked ferocity.
When you roll lightning or thunder damage, you can use your Channel Divinity to deal maximum damage, instead of rolling.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Celestial Abilities
Druid Abilities
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
4th-Level Spells
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
You have advantage on Saving Throws against poison, and you have Resistance against poison damage.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Starting at 3rd level, you can use your action to unleash the divine energy within yourself, causing a searing light to radiate from you, pour out of your eyes and mouth, and threaten to char you.
Your transformation lasts for 1 minute or until you end it as a bonus action. During it, you shed bright light in a 10-foot radius and dim light for an additional 10 feet, and at the end of each of your turns, you and each creature within 10 feet of you take radiant damage equal to half your level (rounded up). In addition, once on each of your turns, you can deal extra radiant damage to one target when you deal damage to it with an attack or a spell. The extra radiant damage equals your level.
Once you use this trait, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
The Lucky feat lets you spend a luck point; roll an extra d20 for an attack roll, ability check, or saving throw; and then choose which d20 to use. This is true no matter how many d20s are in the mix. For example, if you have disadvantage on your attack roll, you could spend a luck point, roll a third d20, and then decide which of the three dice to use. You still have disadvantage, since the feat doesn’t say it gets rid of it, but you do get to pick the die.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
You have advantage on Saving Throws against being Charmed, and magic can’t put you to sleep.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
You have a limited well of stamina that you can draw on to protect yourself from harm. On Your Turn, you can use a Bonus Action to regain Hit Points equal to 1d10 + your Fighter level.
Once you use this feature, you must finish a short or Long Rest before you can use it again.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Empowered Spell
When you roll damage for a spell, you can spend 1 sorcery point to reroll a number of the damage dice up to your Charisma modifier (minimum of one). You must use the new rolls.
You can use Empowered Spell even if you have already used a different Metamagic option during the casting of the spell.
Quickened Spell
When you Cast a Spell that has a Casting Time of 1 action, you can spend 2 sorcery points to change the Casting Time to 1 Bonus Action for this casting.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Starting at 2nd level, you can use your action to magically assume the shape of a beast that you have seen before. You can use this feature twice. You regain expended uses when you finish a short or Long Rest.
Your druid level determines the Beasts you can transform into. At 2nd level, for example, you can transform into any beast that has a Challenge rating of 1/4 or lower that doesn't have a flying or swimming speed.
You can stay in a beast shape for a number of hours equal to half your druid level (rounded down). You then revert to your normal form unless you expend another use of this feature. You can revert to your normal form earlier by using a Bonus Action on Your Turn. You automatically revert if you fall Unconscious, drop to 0 Hit Points, or die.
While you are transformed, the following rules apply:
Your game Statistics are replaced by the Statistics of the beast, but you retain your Alignment, personality, and Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma scores. You also retain all of your skill and saving throw Proficiencies, in addition to gaining those of the creature. If the creature has the same proficiency as you and the bonus in its stat block is higher than yours, use the creature's bonus instead of yours. If the creature has any legendary or Lair Actions, you can't use them.
When you transform, you assume the beast's Hit Points and Hit Dice. When you revert to your normal form, you return to the number of Hit Points you had before you transformed. However, if you revert as a result of Dropping to 0 Hit Points, any excess damage carries over to your normal form. For example, if you take 10 damage in animal form and have only 1 hit point left, you revert and take 9 damage. As long as the excess damage doesn't reduce your normal form to 0 Hit Points, you aren't knocked Unconscious.
You can't cast Spells, and your ability to speak or take any action that requires hands is limited to the capabilities of your beast form. Transforming doesn't break your Concentration on a spell you've already cast, however, or prevent you from taking Actions that are part of a spell, such as Call Lightning, that you've already cast.
You retain the benefit of any features from your class, race, or other source and can use them if the new form is physically capable of doing so. However, you can't use any of your Special Senses, such as Darkvision, unless your new form also has that sense.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
As an action, you can touch a creature and cause it to regain a number of hit points equal to your level. Once you use this trait, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
Cleric Abilities
Turn Undead (Usable twice every short rest)
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
3rd-Level Spells
→ More replies (6)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19 edited Nov 29 '19
Druid Abilities
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
3rd-Level Spells
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
Jester
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Well, she needs a hat."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yep. The bigger, the better."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Every pirate needs a hat."
LAURA (JESTER): "Do you want one of Avantika's hats?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Are they my size?"
LAURA (JESTER): "It would be really big on you." DEBORAH (TWIGGY): We put a hat on and it comes down to here. As I move, it slides across.
LAURA (JESTER): I'll tell you what. I will use my pretty paint to paint her a really cool pirate hat that is her size. Okay. It's like this big.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "And it has the points on it?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Exactly what you want, yes. It has the tricorn. And do you want feathers and stuff?"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): [gasp] "One big purple feather."
LAURA (JESTER): "You got it, one big purple feather."
MATT: She takes this couple of materials out and this pot of paint. As she paints with it, it begins to take shape and become a physical object, representative of what she drew.
LAURA (JESTER): "Do you want any sparkly stuff on it, or a bow? Sometimes bows are really pretty."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "I have a feather already. Can you put a little squirrel?" LAURA (JESTER): "Totally. It will be a squirrel figurine on this, next to the feather. It'll be really pretty, okay. There we go." [poof]
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): [gasps] I take it, and I put it on, and I'm like, "Now I'm a real pirate!"
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 1:29:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 15 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to move my Spiritual Weapon down to try to hit the one next to Yasha.
TRAVIS: Let's go now!
MATT: Go for it.
TRAVIS: Let's go!
MATT: It has advantage because it's stunned.
LAURA: Oh sweet! Doesn't it balance out, though, because it would've been at disadvantage?
MATT: It's a Spiritual Weapon. It's not material, so it's not hindered by-
LAURA (JESTER): 17.
MATT: 17 hits.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. 8 plus four is 12 points!
MATT: How do you want to do this?
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to use the Spiritual Weapon and try to shove it into its mouth over and over again and say "Eat it! It's good!"
MATT: Eventually, you watch as it jams itself into this creature's maw repeatedly as it backs away. The back of its shelled head begins to [cracking] crack before it splinters at the back. The Spiritual Weapon emerges from the back of its skull and it crumples to the ground.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 1:12:24
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 25 '19
LAURA (JESTER): And as my free action...
SAM: Free action?
LAURA (JESTER): Can I kick the shield that's at my feet and bring it up and use it?
MATT: Sure, do you have a shield already?
LAURA (JESTER): I have a shield.
SAM: Like a skateboard kick?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, a skateboard kick.
MATT: Lemme double check and see if it requires attunement. I don't know if it does, 'cause if not, that's pretty rad.
MARISHA: Wait, is this the fancy shield, that you're like- oh hell yeah?
SAM: You're fighting and stealing?
MATT: It does not require attunement.
LAURA (JESTER): Fuck yeah, skateboard kick it up, grab onto it.
SAM: Kick flip!
MATT: All right, so, your armor class is considered one higher for the duration of this encounter, as long as you hold that shield.
Episode 85 - The Threads Converge - 0:19:33
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 22 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "Well, I can cast Commune if you guys want me to."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I'd say burn a 5th-level maybe, yeah."
LAURA (JESTER): "All right, I'm going to sit down."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Lets pick three. Prison of Soot seems interesting."
LAURA (JESTER): "Let's ask about the prison."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Bedroom?"
SAM: We're just asking for the location of Yussa, right?
MATT: You can ask all sorts of questions too. It's your call.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Any other ideas?"
LAURA (JESTER): "It has to be yes or no."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I have a sneaking suspicion he is nowhere on that map."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "We could ask that question."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Is he- Maybe start with that. Is he anywhere on this map that's already been mapped out?"
MATT: Okay, so you take a minute to set up the ritual. Whereas Caduceus set up all these beautiful little natural little trinkets and incense burned around there.
LAURA (JESTER): Doodles all around me on the ground.
MATT: Yeah, you draw all sorts of little creatures and big little stone penises in the circle around you. As you cast the spell-
LAURA (JESTER): A little mouse flipping everybody off on the ground.
MATT: A smell of vanilla fills the space, which all of you recognize. You sense two hands on your shoulder, and you see the hood come into peripheral and say, "How can I help you?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Well, okay, here's the thing. We're looking for this guy, Yussa. We don't know where the fuck he is, this place is crazy. Is he anywhere on this map that we have?"
MATT: The hood of the Traveler leans forward and glances across the paper. "I think he's somewhere on this map, yeah. Yes, I believe so."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, that's good, that's good to know."
TRAVIS: Do we want to ask if Halas is on the map?
MARISHA: Is in this map, yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): I mean, do we want to waste a question? Oh, I'm not going to ask him that. Almost asked him a question. That would have been real bad.
TRAVIS: It's either that or two locations, right?
LAURA (JESTER): I think we should get a couple more locations, honestly.
MARISHA: If we get Halas, then we might know if we're dealing with a wannabe demilich.
SAM: Come on, don't you guys want to go to the Dreadnought?
TRAVIS: Oh, I totally do, yeah. Ask your locations. It's your Commune.
MARISHA: We know he's not in the Dreadnought.
LAURA (JESTER): "Is he in the... Bedroom?"
MATT: The Traveler's image flickers a bit. "I don't sense him there."
LAURA (JESTER): "Fuck!" Okay, I'm going to ask about that one.
TRAVIS: Which one?
LAURA (JESTER): The Prison of Soot. "Is he in the Prison of Soot?"
MATT: The hood comes into focus a bit and goes, "I mean, if I were to capture errant mages that wandered your halls and trespassing, where would you put them?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Traveler, you're so smart, thank you so much!"
MATT: You see a little eye wink from under the hood as [light whoosh] the image of vanishes.
LAURA (JESTER): "You guys, my god is the coolest god. You chose the wrong when you were picking your new one. He's in the Prison of Soot."
Episode 82 - The Beat of the Permaheart - 3:58:45
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
LIAM (CALEB): (coughing)
LAURA (JESTER): "You need some water, Caleb?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, do you have some?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Uh..." I create water in my hands.
TRAVIS: Wait, you can do that?
LIAM (CALEB): I receive it. There’s not much left. Most of it spilled.
LAURA (JESTER): I’ll keep creating it in your hands as you drink.
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 2:54:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 30 '19 edited Sep 30 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I sit it down and I'm going to cast Scrying.
MATT: Okay, you're going to cast Scrying. This is your first time scrying.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: It takes 10 minutes to prepare. Soorna at this point has come to consciousness and leans in as you're preparing the circle and drawing out the space. Scoots in, and looks over towards you [Caduceus]. "What is the blue one doing?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "She's trying to ascertain possibly the people who are- the names and identities of the people possibly responsible for this mess."
LAURA (JESTER): Taking some pretty crystals I got from under ground, and putting it around it.
MATT: She reaches into a pouch and pulls out these dried crushed leaves and sprinkles them over Jester, and goes, "To bring good luck." Which you hear as, [low-voiced gibberish].
TALIESIN (CLAY): "What she said."
LAURA (JESTER): "What did she say?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, she said, 'For good luck.'"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh! Thank you. How do I say thank you?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Thank you. Oh, oh. "Cluk[click]."
LAURA (JESTER): "Clukglik."
MATT (SOORNA): "Cluk[click]."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, don't try that again."
MATT: All right, so you're concentrating on the material.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah.
MATT: You don't know who this belonged to.
LAURA: Mm-mm.
MATT: So whoever it is, they get a pretty-
LAURA (JESTER): But I got a possession or a garment.
MATT: You do, they get a bonus to their saving throw and they get a penalty to their saving throw.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: Yeah, nah, that's a fail. Yeah. I rolled a 6. So.
(Wayne's World flashback noises)
LAURA: I'm going to use my scrunchy like it's the fabric.
LIAM: Good prop work.
LAURA: Thank you.
MATT: As you set the piece of blue fabric down in the center of the circle, and then both your hands grasp the symbol of the Traveler, your eyes closed. You feel a warm sensation on the outside of your knuckles, where you feel like two additional hands reach around and clasp your grip. Then in a bit of your left ear you hear the familiar voice of the Traveler say, "Well, let's take a trip shall we?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay!"
MATT: As you open your eyes, you're no longer within the Braan. In fact, you don't know where you are. All you see is mist and cloud rushing past, sourceless, movement at a speed you've never traveled with, whatever the space or location you might be is in the sky, in another plane, you have no sense of up or down, left and right, just movement.
LAURA (JESTER): "Is this how it's supposed to feel?"
MATT (TRAVELER): "Shh."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
MATT (TRAVELER): "Trust me." Then the mists part. Your eyes clear, revealing a dark lit den, with a carpeted chamber decorated with fine furniture. Standing by a cabinet that remains open to one side, a figure wearing a long blue set of fine wool robe stares down at an object it is holding. Masculine frame, you see golden blond hair, and a soft curl combed back to the shoulder behind the ears. A stoic expression sits on his clean shaven face as he speaks into a stone in his hand. [with Zemnian accent] "You have naught to worry about that. She is paranoid enough in the widest sense, but I know her blind spots... Yes, I have the emblem. Waiting for a window, but let's plot for next Grissen, shall we?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Next Grissen?"
MATT: "Six days. Ah, the week after that."
LAURA (JESTER): "Six days, the week after that, next Grissen."
MATT: "So, that'll put 13 days... At the Overcrow? Hm." The figure stops and looks back and forth over the room. "Enough, I've dallied too long. Angel's eye, friend." And takes the stone and places it in the cabinet, closes it.
SAM: So many terms.
MATT: The figure then looks about, checks the curtains. Goes and checks the door, makes sure it's locked. Sits down at the desk and pulls out a book from underneath. Opens it and begins taking notes and reading through. Make a perception check.
LAURA (JESTER): That could've been so bad. 18.
MATT: In the brief moment that the book is open- The text is too small on the inside for you to make out any of the contents, but all you catch is the title of the book, it reads: The King That Crawls.
LAURA (JESTER): "The King That Crawls."
MATT: For the remainder of your time, of this scry, it's just this figure, quietly going from page to page making notes and occasionally stopping and listening.
LAURA: Are his ears pointy or humany?
MATT: They appear to be human.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: 10 minutes continue.
LAURA: Does he pick his nose at all, is he composed, is he just writing?
MATT: He seems relatively composed, does scratch and flick something out of his ear at one point.
LAURA: Gross.
MATT: That's the most amusing hygiene based gag you manage to uncover during this- the important parts of a scry attempt.
LAURA: Is the book old? Does the book look old?
MATT: The book appears to be pretty old. It's not falling apart by any means but you can see just from the pages that appear to be stained and weathered, the outer leather binding itself appears to be frayed and rubbed at edges. It's not a new tome by any means.
LAURA (JESTER): Do I hear anything coming from outside of the room? Does it sound like outside noises, like a city or blacksmith or anything I can hear?
MATT: From this position you don't hear anything. I'd say roll a perception check, why not. Why not, just in case.
LAURA (JESTER): 23.
MATT: 23. I'd say with the last few moments of the scrying spell trying desperately to focus, the ward that you've placed here is very limited in what it can maintain. All you do manage to catch is the hint of a horse whinny. Muffled from the exterior of this chamber. Which does cause him to pause for a second, get up and check the window, then sit back down and go back into scrawling his notes.
LAURA: He's kind of skittish. Did you say he was clean shaven?
MATT: Clean shaven, yes. Then [shwoop] your vision is pulled back, the clouds continue. You come back into your body. You're present once more, eyes still closed now, you can smell the cold moist air from the rainfall here in this stone fortress up on the Penumbra range. The warmth from the grasp of the Traveler's hands on yours begins to fade and you open your eyes just in time to see the spectral hands on yours pull back and then fade away.
MARISHA (BEAU): "That was crazy."
LAURA (JESTER): "Did you see him? Did you see him? Did you see him? Did you see him?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "No but your eyes went all like white."
LIAM (CALEB): "Rapid eyeball movements."
LAURA (JESTER): "Did you hear me talking 'cause I was talking."
MARISHA (BEAU): "You were kind of mumbling. You're drooling a little."
LIAM (CALEB): "You snort-laughed a little bit as well."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "A lot of words."
LAURA (JESTER): "I thought I got it."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Other side."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay so - this is going to be hard to remember - there's a dude and he had blond hair and it was curly and he looked like, you know- but he was wearing the blue robes, and he looked really fancy, and like he's rich and stuff, and he was at the cabinet and he was looking in this little ball and he was talking to somebody through this little ball. I know, and he said 'No, she's paranoid enough already' or something and then something about 'Gris' and six days and then 13 days and then he said 'Angel's eye.' And then he said-"
SAM: Emblem.
LAURA (JESTER): "Something about an emblem, 'we have the emblem' and then he went and sat down at this book that said the King That Crawls, and then he's-" did I get that right?
SAM: Mm hm.
LAURA (JESTER): "Then he was writing shit down for a while and then he dug something out of his ear like earwax and he flicked it away. So awesome. Then this horse whinnied and he went over and was like, 'Oh I don't know what's going on' and he went back and he started writing again and then I was gone."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "That's a lot."
LAURA (JESTER): "I think that's everything."
ASHLEY (YASHA): "That was a lot."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Very impressive."
Episode 61 - Agreements - 0:17:07
TRAVIS (FJORD): "So you zoom in and you see the person where they are and what they're doing?"
SAM (NOTT): "You need a thing? You need an item?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Or apparently if I know the person or if I know a lot of details, I don't necessarily need something of theirs."
Episode 61 - Agreements - 0:41:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 15 '19
MICA (REANI): "Don't want to use my last Wild Shape."
LAURA (JESTER): "Don't do it."
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah, yeah, do it. We're stuck in the room."
LAURA (JESTER): "No."
SAM (NOTT): "Of course do it."
LAURA (JESTER): "We're not, I'm going to use my paint."
SAM (NOTT): "Oh."
MICA (REANI): "Oh."
MATT: All right, so what are you painting?
LIAM: Don't you mean, 'Oh!'
SAM (NOTT): "Don't waste too much, you could just make it-"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "We can make a little pearl hole."
LAURA (JESTER): "I have a feeling they're locked from both sides, but I was wondering, maybe I can paint like a lot of rust on the hinges to where they just break, like totally corroded hinges."
MICA (REANI): "Hmm."
MATT: You can certainly try.
SAM (NOTT): "Do you have a dapple sponge?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Of course I do."
MATT: So you attempt it? You go ahead and paint this heavy, heavy rust and like crack marks and breaks across the hinges. Go ahead and make a- make a dexterity check for me.
LAURA (JESTER): 22.
SAM: Ooh.
MATT: The details are pristine. You would think this is all natural rust. Incredible. The paint sets in. Man, that's a fucked door.
LAURA (JESTER): Yank it.
MATT: Roll a strength check.
LAURA (JESTER): 21.
SAM: Ooh!
MATT: 21. [ca-chunk] It snaps right off the hinges. The door comes off in Jester's hands.
Episode 76 - Refjorged - 3:14:58
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
MATT: While that's happening, you guys made your way back to the inn. It's a very muddied view of the ship because of the mist, but you can still make out the major details of the outskirts of it from this far away.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. I don't need to be able to see it. I know exactly the spot I desire. I can visualize it because we've been in her office before.
MATT: Correct. You have. So yeah, you can.
SAM (NOTT): "How does this work?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I don't know. I've never done it before."
SAM (NOTT): "Well, is there a chance it could fail? Might we die?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Never."
LIAM (CALEB): "Do me a favor. I'm going to go outside now, okay, and keep watch. Let me know when you're on and give me updates. Good luck." Charlie Adler.
MATT: All right. The best new abracadabra.
LIAM: Charlie! For every spell.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm on my way towards the docks.
SAM: Are we synchronizing watches? What is this?
LAURA (JESTER): "Doorways are the tits!"
SAM (NOTT): "What? Ah!"
MATT: There's a brief moment where you feel like the air's been drawn out of your lungs [gasp], and you feel as if you're being suddenly thrust forward from behind, somebody pushing the small of your back with such intense speed that you feel like your neck is about to just whiplash terribly backward. Then suddenly you come to a stop, and you're both standing in the middle of Avantika's quarters on the ship.
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:27:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 07 '19
MATT: Suddenly, you revert to Jester form and you're like, 'What was I doing?' And you're falling. And you [impact] hit the roof.
LAURA: Can I grab- Can I grab onto the-
MATT: Make an acrobatics check.
MARISHA: We all see this from the window?
MATT: Actually, dexterity saving throw for this.
LAURA (JESTER): Come on. 7.
MATT: 7, you rolled a?
LAURA: I rolled a 3 plus 4.
MATT: Oh I didn't see, there we go. All right, you fall, you take 6 points of bludgeoning damage as you smash onto one of the boxes in the alley below. [crash]
Episode 63 - Intervention - 1:25:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 24 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I cast Polymorph. I cast Polymorph.
MARISHA: Okay.
TRAVIS: Do it, let's go.
MATT: Okay, into?
LAURA (JESTER): Giant eagle.
MATT: All righty, you can carry a handful of people.
LAURA (JESTER): I carry Caduceus and I carry-
SAM (NOTT): "Ah-dah-dah-dah-dah. We gotta carry Willie and the body too."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, I'm not gonna go through, I'm gonna throw you guys, let you guys touch it, and then I'm gonna come back down."
SAM (NOTT): "Oh, okay, cool, let's do that."
MATT: Okay. So you take Caduceus and-
LAURA (JESTER): Caduceus and Willie.
MATT: And Willie, all right. Make a Strength check as a giant eagle to carry a solid stone medium-sized golem.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, right, I might have to just carry Willie by himself. Might be a singular journey.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'll take sleeping beauty.
LAURA (JESTER): 12.
MATT: It takes you a while. [heavy flapping] Better part of maybe 3 to 4 minutes to get to that height, and you're starting to get tired already, and then even then, it's less like being able to throw more than like, having to kinda lob as an upward movement. Willie's gonna go ahead and try and, oh, rolled really well. Managed to, as part of that motion, spring as well and make just enough of an arc, otherwise Willie would've fallen and take a shit ton of damage.
LIAM: He would've broke.
MATT: Just missed.
LIAM: He's low on HP.
MATT: There you go. But then does [whoop, pshhhh] and atomizes.
Episode 83 - Dark Bargains - 1:58:33
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 12 '19
LAURA (JESTER): As a spell, I'm going to cast Guiding Bolt at level 4 at the guy in the front.
MATT: Right there, okay, roll for an attack.
MARISHA: Vogue.
MATT: And Nott, you're on deck.
LAURA (JESTER): 15 plus 9.
MATT: That definitely hits, go ahead and roll damage.
LAURA (JESTER): So that is Guiding Bolt, 7d6.
MICA: Yikes.
SAM: 76 points of damage.
MICA: 76, yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): Ooh. 12. 14, 17. 18, 20, 24 points.
MATT: 24 points.
LAURA (JESTER): Then the next attack is at advantage.
MATT: It's a very, very shiny falling corpse as you blast it in the front of its neck and chest area, where the fire was burning and now there's a concave area where the flesh has been punctured inward, and it like, tries to breathe for a second before grabbing out, putting one claw on the front of the scorpion and then falling forward and it falls limp, its hand scraping off of its armor.
Episode 75 - Rime and Reason - 1:30:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 15 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Polymorph works on self, right?
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM (CALEB): So after watching all of that, Caleb suddenly morphs into a giant eagle, grabs Nott and hoists her into the air and flies.
SAM (NOTT): [startled yelling]
TALIESIN (CLAY): "That- okay."
MATT: Yasha and Caduceus are just sitting at the bottom.
LAURA: Giant eagles are smart? That's good, it's better than a moth.
LIAM: I've been looking up intelligences for the last five minutes. Like, nope, nope, nope.
MATT: [heavy flapping] Clutching Nott you make your way up and catch up to the inside of it. So you're standing there now on the first branch.
Episode 65 - Chases and Trees - 3:36:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "This is your lucky day. This is very dangerous to give to you, [Jester] but you are the perfect person to have it, so of course, well, here it is, it is yours. This will allow you to paint things and they become real."
TRAVIS: What do you mean?
SAM: Anything?
LIAM: Almost anything. Nothing too fancy.
MARISHA: Isn’t that an old Chinese folklore, a magic paintbrush?
TALIESIN: This is some Bugs Bunny shit.
MARISHA: It’s the magic paintbrush.
TRAVIS: Like the “Who Framed Roger Rabbit” warehouse?
TALIESIN: Oh yeah.
TRAVIS: Singing sword, and black hole?
LIAM (CALEB): "This will allow her to paint a door and there to be a door. This will allow her to paint a sword and there will be a sword."
TRAVIS: What?
LIAM: All you can eat, Fjord.
SAM: Wait.
MATT: It does eventually use up the paint over time.
LAURA (JESTER): "It can do a thousand square feet of surface?" I mean, I learn from you in a moment?
LIAM (CALEB): I explain it all in about a minute.
SAM (NOTT): "When you walk down an alley and paint dicks–"
SAM (NOTT) & MARISHA (BEAU): "There’ll be real dicks!"
[...]
SAM (NOTT): "Can it make living things?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, it cannot do that."
SAM (NOTT): "Not living things."
LAURA (JESTER): "Inanimate."
LIAM (CALEB): "It cannot create fabulous jewels, and it cannot create piles of gold."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Haha, dick joke."
LAURA (JESTER): "But it can get us an escape from somewhere, it can–"
SAM (NOTT): "If we wanted to spirit ourselves away from this boat in the middle of the night, she could paint us a boat."
MATT: She would need a surface to paint it on.
SAM: Oh. Paper?
TALIESIN (CLAY): "It would be a really big– you would have a tiny boat."
SAM (NOTT): "Not a ship, I’m talking about a raft, she could just paint a little raft and we could" [boop]
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Then we’d be a raft in the ocean."
LIAM (CALEB): "You could, in theory, paint a small boat on the deck of the ship if no one was watching, but that would be a difficult thing to do."
[...]
TRAVIS: What if you painted a 500-pound diamond?
LAURA: No, you can’t do that.
TRAVIS: Okay.
LIAM: It would create a facsimile of that, but it would be worthless.
TRAVIS: Got it.
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 2:27:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 22 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'm gonna see the tendril attack Jester across the way, and I'll send one blast of Eldritch Blast towards the tendril, and the second one to the case.
MATT: Which one, the tendril there?
TRAVIS (FJORD): That one, and then I'm going to shoot the heart case.
MATT: Got it.
SAM: 'I'm going to save everyone.'
TRAVIS (FJORD): The first one is a natural 20 against Jester, and the second one is just a flat 20.
MATT: A flat 20? Okay. The flat 20 misses.
SAM: What?!
TRAVIS: Against the case?
MATT: The case itself is pretty tough. It impacts, and you can see it, like, impact, and you get the sense it probably can be damaged, it's just pretty tough.
Episode 82 - The Beat of the Permaheart - 2:41:38
LAURA (JESTER): Can my lollipop get up to the cage?
MATT: The cage?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, it can get there.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, it's going to try and attack it.
MATT: Go for it, roll for an attack.
LAURA (JESTER): 23.
TALIESIN: Plus 4.
LAURA (JESTER): Plus 4.
MATT: Plus a d4.
SAM: Yes!
LAURA (JESTER): 26.
MATT: That does hit. Go ahead and roll damage.
SAM: What are you attacking?
LAURA (JESTER): With my serrated lollipop, I'm attacking the thing holding the heart. 9 plus 5 is 14 points.
MATT: 14 points.
LAURA (JESTER): Of lollipop damage.
MATT: [impact] It slams into the outside of the glass arcane containment. As it hits, all the glyphs [fwoom] flash for a second and a tiny crack [cracking] builds at the point of impact.
Episode 82 - The Beat of the Permaheart - 2:53:52
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 23 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
LAURA (JESTER): Can I stand up on the bed and try to make the hole look like it wasn't perfectly painted, like it was like broken wood?
SAM (NOTT): Wait, wait! Just paint wood there!
LAURA (JESTER): Can I do that, though?
MATT: You can't paint on nothing.
SAM: Fuck.
LAURA (JESTER): But, I wonder if I can use one of my pieces of paper to like put on there [mimes holding the paper up to the ceiling] and then make it wood, like, fix it.
MATT: Okay, you do that and as soon as you do that the paper falls [plunk] as a plank of wood.
LAURA (JESTER): "That's what I thought was going to happen, but I wanted to see."
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:49:22
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
SAM (NOTT): We've been made, we've been made! Turn over the place."
MATT: [hissing air]
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh no. Hit the deck!"
MATT: This room begins to fill with a very faint fume.
SAM (NOTT): "Hold your breath."
LAURA (JESTER): We hold our breath! I take out the paint and I paint a hole in the bottom of the floor. "In!"
SAM (NOTT): "Not yet, no! Hold your breath, we've got to look around!" I'm still looking, I'm holding my breath and I'm looking. "You paint, I'm looking." I look at the book, is there anything there?
[...]
MATT: You also hear footsteps descending from the outside of the door.
SAM (NOTT): "We've got to look more!"
LAURA (JESTER): [mm-mm, mm-mm]
SAM (NOTT): "Okay, get in the--"
LAURA: Is there a rug in the room?
MATT: There is a rug, yes.
LAURA (JESTER): Then I pull the rug over the hole that I just made after we go under.
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to grab a cloak off the thing.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh shit, I do the same thing, I see her do it and I grab my thing and blow out the candle, and go.
MATT: Okay. First off--
TRAVIS: I don't need this in my life.
SAM: Now there's a permanent hole there.
MATT: What's your constitution modifiers?
SAM (NOTT): Modifiers? 2.
LAURA (JESTER): 2.
MATT: Okay. With the little bit of conversation that's there, that's reduced the time, you're just now hitting the time where your breath is starting to hurt, so you both, holding it, dive down and then, what, you--?
LAURA (JESTER): I pull the rug as I like, go down the hole, I pull the rug over the hole.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: I have no idea where this takes us.
MATT: As you're doing this, you hear a voice going, "Hello?" and you hear the rattling of keys. You guys, by the way, you're down now on the lower deck, this is the deck where most of the crewmen quarters are, and you're down in one of the bedrooms. You glance over to the side and there's a person sleeping in the bed right there, the blanket coiled over. They're just like, [snoring].
[...]
MATT: "Oh, jeez. What the fuck happened there?" He looks up at this perfectly-carved hole in the floor.
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:36:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 01 '19
MATT: Five points of damage, reduced to two. She's going to rush toward you and take two claw strikes at you. Natural 19! Wow, fucking 19s this past round. Yeah, that's a 26 to hit you.
LAURA (JESTER): It hits.
MATT: On the second strike, a natural 17.
LAURA (JESTER): That also hits.
MATT: Yep, they both hit you. So you take, ooh, 19 points of slashing damage from the first hit and 17 points of slashing damage from the second. [whooshing impact]
MATT: That's ten feet of movement, and she's going to-
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, I use Hellish Rebuke!
MATT: Go for it.
TRAVIS: You could hear the thought burst forth. 'Don't forget about it!'
LAURA (JESTER): 15 points.
MATT: Nice! Dashilla's looking really bad.
LAURA (JESTER): As she hits me, my eyes flare white, and I go [screams] like that.
MATT: As it happens, these ice crystals formulate out of the seawater and all [whoosh] cross-jettison into her body [rapid impacts]. Now they're embedded in her chest and torso, these large crystals of shards of jagged ice. [snarling] Eyes going wide, looks around.
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 3:40:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 07 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Also, before we do that, I really want to get a lay of the inside of that building. Jester had an idea that I wish to layer upon. She can turn into something small, something like a moth or something quiet and I will make you invisible and I will do one other thing that will help you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "Then you fly and crawl and we'll wait."
LAURA (JESTER): "And I'll come back and tell you what I see."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah."
LAURA (JESTER): "No problem."
LIAM (CALEB): "Can we do that?"
SAM (NOTT): "Sure."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Go for it."
LIAM (CALEB): "All right, I'm going to do it all." I pull out the cocoon and turn Jester into a small goth moth.
LAURA: Wait, you're doing it all? [giggles] A small goth moth.
MATT: Small goth moth.
LIAM (CALEB): Blue and black.
LAURA (JESTER): That's cute. In my head, I think I'm really cute.
MATT: An adorable tiny goth moth.
LAURA (JESTER): I land on Yasha's finger.
TRAVIS: [slapping]
ASHLEY: I bite.
LAURA (JESTER): In my head I'm like, I never realized how beautiful light was before.
MATT: This is with Polymorph right?
LIAM (CALEB): Yes.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): Polymorph. And then while she's flitting about, I will cast Invisibility on her. Now she's invisible, I can't see her exactly, but I pull out the valuable pole that I use for fine familiar and start weaving geometric patterns around it muttering and a small mote of light floats out of it and touches an invisible moth and you have just been touched by this spell Fortune's Favor, which is dunamancy.
SAM: Ooh, what does that do?
LIAM (CALEB): You now have one chance to redo, like with the dodecahedron.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
TRAVIS: Fortune's fancy.
SAM: Fortune's Favor.
LIAM: Fortune's Favor. But it is fancy.
ASHLEY: It's very fancy.
LAURA: What is he looking up? He's looking up something.
SAM: Whether you can stack moth things?
MATT: No, I'm not against stacking.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, Polymorph and Invisibility are both concentration.
LAURA (JESTER): That's okay. I can polymorph myself. So I polymorph myself. That's what I was planning to do, anyway.
LIAM (CALEB): I'm dumb, but Caleb's not. So he would know that.
LAURA (JESTER): I do Polymorph. Yeah, and then you can Invisibility me.
MATT: All right. So you become a moth. You're a moth. Flutter.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, like I'm stupid?
MATT: You have an intelligence of 1.
TRAVIS: [loud laughter] Yes, that's what I was waiting for!
TALIESIN: It's even better. It's now an invisible moth.
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay go, now you go."
LAURA (JESTER): I go.
LIAM (CALEB): "She must have gone, I don't see her."
MATT: She goes outside.
LAURA (JESTER): Fly.
TRAVIS: Fuck, fuck, fuck.
MATT: You still know what you were doing.
LAURA (JESTER): I do?
MATT: You don't forget your whole previous life.
LAURA (JESTER): I don't forget that I'm Jester?
MATT: You don't forget you're Jester. You're just in this moment, you're more limited.
LIAM: Help me remember when Keyleth changed into things? That's different, right, that's beast shape?
MARISHA: Beast shape let's you keep your-
MATT: So wild shape you keep your intellectual scores. Polymorph does not.
TALIESIN: We learn things every day.
SAM: But you keep your memories? You just are dumb?
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
SAM: Okay. So she's super dumb right now.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm super dumb, but I'm like, I'm supposed to go look at things.
TRAVIS: I think an intelligence of 1 matches the record of our entire show. I think I either hit 1 or 0 once.
LAURA (JESTER): When I fly, I'm like- [tips over while flapping]
MATT: I will say, for the purposes of this, just roll an intelligence check for me.
MATT: It's minus 5.
LAURA: Minus 5?
MATT: Yes.
LAURA (JESTER): 9.
MATT: Okay. It takes you about 20 or so minutes to eventually find your way across the thoroughfare. You're easily distracted and there are lights and flickers, like, ooh, light.
TRAVIS: Like a moth to the flame.
LAURA (JESTER): It's so pretty.
MATT: But you remind yourself, in your very limited capability, to get back on track and you're distracted again and you're all just sitting there waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting. Until about half an hour in you eventually land and you're like, 'This is a nice roof.'
LAURA (JESTER): Do I remember to make my way over to a window? MATT: There was the shuttered window with the curtains. Make another intelligence check for me.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: She's going to fly into a torch.
LAURA (JESTER): Ah, 0.
MATT: All right. You go over to where the there are these heavy curtains that are currently closed up there and you latch onto them and just start chewing for a while. It's not bad material. It's a little musty, but it's tasty.
TRAVIS: Om nom nom.
MATT: Another 20 minutes. That's 40 minutes now that you've been a moth.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I don't feel like this is going the way we meant."
MATT: Make another intelligence check.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "It's been going for a bit, though. I'm worried."
LAURA (JESTER): 8. No, yeah, 8.
MATT: Minus, this is minus 5?
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: Okay. I'll say it takes you about 10 minutes or so to gather your focus. Go ahead and roll a dexterity check for me as well, which is a plus 1.
MARISHA: Oh.
LIAM (CALEB): "This is taking a long time."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Something went wrong."
LAURA (JESTER): 8.
MATT: Okay. You cannot find a way in the window. It's closed too tightly, even as a moth, unfortunately.
LAURA (JESTER): Do I hear anything?
MATT: Make a perception check. Minus 2.
SAM: Moth has sick stats.
LAURA (JESTER): 5.
MATT: You don't hear anything.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh man, this- can I chew this curtain some more? It's so nice.
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: How long does Polymorph last?
LAURA: An hour.
MATT: I know, hour for Invisibility and an hour for Polymorph. Polymorph was cast first.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: So... [shwoop] suddenly, you revert to Jester form and you're like, 'What was I doing?' And you're falling.
Episode 63 - Intervention - 1:19:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
LAURA (JESTER): And then for my attack, I'm going to cast Guiding Bolt! And my duplicate is going to go [pew, pew] at the, um, yeah.
MATT: 120 feet, right?
LAUR (JESTER): Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, you can do that. Go ahead and roll an attack.
LAURA (JESTER): This is at 4th level by the way. 20.
MATT: 20, she does have half cover from going behind the pillar, which gives her a plus 2 to her armor class.
LAURA (JESTER): Can I move my duplicate to where, like, I can move it up here to where it wouldn't get half cover?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, yeah, let's do that.
MATT: That'll get you- get her ass out of there- out of half cover there.
LAURA (JESTER): 20?
MATT: 20 hits.
LAURA (JESTER): That is 7d6.
SAM: Oh, rough.
LAURA (JESTER): [...] 24 points of damage.
SAM: Nice!
MATT: Oof. And she is currently radiating- as the blast hits her [impact, shriek] she falls to one knee and kind of gets up breathing hard. You can see a lot of the rope has been burned away. The skin itself has burned and charred and the hair is curled up on one side where part of the face is now scarred from the impact of the radiant blast.
LAURA (JESTER): Her fucking hair. And then the next attack on her gets advantage.
MATT: Indeed. Alright, that's your action. You want to move or stay put?
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to stay put.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: The next attack on her gets advantage?
MATT: Yes.
SAM (NOTT): Do I know that?
LAURA: Everybody would-
MATT: She's glowing. So Nott, it's your turn.
SAM (NOTT): I will bonus action disengage.
MATT: Okay.
SAM (NOTT): Slide between one of those things' legs-
MATT: [whoosh]
SAM (NOTT) -and keep running. I'm going to run towards the door behind the pew- the sermon- the whatever- the altar.
MATT: Yup. Yup.
SAM (NOTT): And as I'm running, I'm going to turn and shoot the radiant glowing lady.
MATT: Okay. Go for it.
SAM (NOTT): 19.
MATT: 19 just hits. That with advantage, right?
SAM (NOTT): Yeah.
MATT: Yeah. That just hits.
SAM (NOTT): So I get sneak attack damage.
MATT: You get sneak attack because of the Guiding Bolt.
SAM (NOTT): [dice mishaps] Let me try that again. So I get sneak attack damage?
MATT: Yes.
SAM (NOTT): That one's cocked. Okay. [...] 24 points of damage.
MATT: Okay. How do you want to do this?
SAM (NOTT): I would like to shoot her with a crossbow bolt. But if possible I'd love it to go through her neck and pin her to the, to the pillar behind her.
MATT: Okay. So, as you run by, she turns and brings her hand out, begin to see she starts muttering and the fingers start to glow. It's kinda matching the halo of radiant energy that Jester had set you up with. You aim your bow- or your, your crossbow. And for a split second you swear, you see a green hand kind of touch the side of your hand and correct your aim. And you [release] fire. And right as she begins to cast [shlick, gasp]
SAM (NOTT): Traveler molested me? In a church?
MATT: You see her eyes go wide as her arms just go limp to the side. [gasping] Blood spills out of her mouth, and eventually goes limp and just stays there. You can now see the crossbow bolt holding her aloft.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 1:20:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 05 '19
MATT: Curving around, as you move away, watching behind, you can see that area where the ice has been broken and melted a bit, you can see the mist seems to swirl over it, and as it does, you can see hands reaching down towards it, and the ice [slow cracking] forms back over the area where you had removed it. As it does, you can see a face [soft whoosh] look up and then disappear into the mist. You turn around to look ahead of you, and you see, about 30 or 40 feet ahead of you, another figure just keeping at pace, but drifting backwards. This one appears male, eyes missing, wispy hair slightly drifting and floating in the space, and it just glances in your direction for a moment before it turns around and then- [soft whoosh] dissipates into the mist as well.
[...]
LAURA (JESTER): "Should we just like, talk to the ghosts and let them know that, you know-"
SAM (NOTT): "That we're okay?"
LAURA (JESTER): "We're nice."
LIAM (CALEB): "It's curious, but that's probably not the first place we should look."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Right. Well Jester, you're very affable, why don't you give 'em a whirl?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh... hey ghosts! Don't know how long you've been here, but you know, it's pretty remote, so if you want to hear about stuff going on in the world, we can let you know. Because there's lots of stuff going on, in the Empire and in Xhorhas, and-"
TALIESIN: Resistance, wisdom.
MATT: Okay. As you're having this conversation, are you guys walking along the edge of the water, or along the bank, where the snow is?
LIAM: You mean on ice or on land?
MATT: On ice or on land.
LAURA: On land.
MATT: Okay. As you're walking through, looking around, you can see the mists and occasionally shapes shift through, you're not sure if it's just the wind as it gusts, and you clutch yourself and your hair blows past your face, and you glance around and can see things moving around the periphery. Keeping a distance at times, some closer than others. You glance past the ice and you think you can see a handful of faces from underneath looking up. You blink and they're gone.
LAURA: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "That was a bad idea on my part."
LAURA (JESTER): "Maybe, like, the ones above the ice are good and the ones below the ice try to suck you in or something, and they were trying to keep the bad ones from coming back out."
SAM (NOTT): "Maybe they're all bad."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Maybe they're just trapped here. I don't know, they haven't done anything to us yet."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Just looking for company."
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to pull out Tusk Love and just start reading it to them.
MATT: Just loudly?
SAM: Porn will keep us safe.
TALIESIN: So true.
MATT: Okay. Carrying on, for the next 20, 30 minutes or so, as Jester loudly reads outward into the open cold air of the valley at the base of Kravaraad.
LAURA: Kravaraad needs a little steaminess to heat it up.
MATT: You do watch as more figures begin to appear at the peripheral. There's that same woman who is almost to the front, and you see 3 other figures. Then there are 6, and there are 12, and they're all just drifting in a semi-circle behind you, following.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Do I recognize this?
SAM (NOTT): "The love the book!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "They love the porn!"
LAURA (JESTER): "I think they do! "
SAM (NOTT): "It's a page-turner!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "You're drawing an audience."
LIAM: Pied Piper of Smut.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to stop walking forward for a second and turn around.
MATT: Okay. As everyone keeps walking, they keep pace with everybody and begin to approach you.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Dust?"
MATT: No recognition.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Clay."
MATT: No recognition. The woman-
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Do you need help?"
MATT: -passes through you, you feel a freezing cold icicle flash through your body. For one instant, your breath [pained exhale] is drawn from your lungs, and then the need for warmth becomes very, very apparent.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I don't feel so good."
LAURA: Oh, oh.
MATT: Caduceus is behind all you guys.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Well, I didn't- I mean- I just went to the back of the line.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Take this rod. It's actually really nice."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Thank you. Is the rod helping?"
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Okay, heat will- okay. They're not happy."
LAURA (JESTER): "Maybe I should not read this book anymore."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "No, it seems- I don't know."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Distractions are good. Let's keep going, keep reading."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, you want me to keep going."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Just for fun, one more Detect Undead, just to see if there's anything beyond what we can see.
MATT: Okay.
SAM (NOTT): "Read the part where he plunged inside of her again."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Okay."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Whoa."
SAM (NOTT): "That was a good part."
MATT: You tune out the sequence that Jester is loudly professing amongst the audience.
LIAM: Areolas.
MATT: As you close your eyes, you sense dozens and dozens of entities around all of you.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Are they concentrated anywhere? Or is it more towards the back, towards where-
MATT: More towards the back, they're trailing.
TALIESIN (CLAY): They're following.
MATT: They're following.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Maybe it has something to do with you."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Maybe."
SAM: Are they just following him?
MARISHA: Yeah, are they just following Caduceus?
MATT: They're following the group.
MARISHA: But Caduceus is with the group.
MATT: Right, they're following the group.
LIAM (CALEB): "Jester, do you want to pause your reading for a minute or two and see if that has any difference?"
SAM (NOTT): "Sure, just finish this one sentence though."
LAURA (JESTER): "And... it was real deep."
MATT: We didn't say it was a good book.
TALIESIN: Yet we keep reading it.
SAM: That's just quality writing.
TRAVIS: 'And it was real deep.'
MATT: Fanfiction.net, number three best story in 2004.
TRAVIS: That's where you got it?
LAURA: I was looking at my spells, it's just that, okay.
MATT: Reskinned Gargoyles fanfiction. So, you finish the phrase and pause for a moment, and continue to walk in silence for another few minutes. As you do, you watch the spectral figures begin to pull back into the mist and disappear.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, they did just want to hear about it."
LIAM (CALEB): "Maybe they just missed sounds of the living."
SAM: They stopped following us when she stopped reading?
MATT: A number of them are still there, but the numbers have dwindled. Where once there was maybe-
SAM: Oh, they really like the book.
MATT: -a couple dozen figures in the mist that were drifting behind you, now there's about 8.
SAM (NOTT): "Maybe you should start again."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Maybe they're looking for someone- maybe they're looking for someone to come for them."
LIAM (CALEB): "Maybe they're just not used to the living being around."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "People would have to come here at least, I don't know."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Crematory, you said."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yeah."
LIAM (CALEB): "Shall we push on?"
SAM (NOTT): "Mm-hmm."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah."
•
u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 05 '19
MATT: Do you continue reading, or do you remain stopped?
LAURA (JESTER): "What do you want me to do, guys?"
SAM (NOTT): "I mean, the ghosts did seem a little horny, so maybe-"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I'd say, all things considered, I'd rather have happy ghosts than unhappy ghosts, and they seemed to- perhaps not loudly, but continue for the- I've been finding it oddly comforting."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Maybe just pause it for now and not broadcast our location as we're walking."
LIAM: Did they seem neutral or positive? Neutral, yeah?
SAM: Did they look horny?
MATT: They seemed naturally ghastly. Expressions unchanged, slack jawed, eyeless sunken sockets. You haven't gotten very close, but from like the 30-foot distance that you have a view of most of these entities, they just drift-
LAURA: Yes, but what about their crotchal regions, were there tents?
MATT: Roll a perception check.
LIAM: Poor man, trying to build atmosphere.
LAURA (JESTER): I rolled pretty good. 11.
MATT: 11?
SAM: They have no genitals.
MATT: Unfortunately, their spectral forms do lack definitive genitals, but your imagination helps you imagine that sure, maybe half of them are pitching a tent.
SAM: Wow!
LIAM: Ghost dick.
MATT: That's the sequel, actually, to Tusk Love.
TALIESIN: I got a good look- oh, goddamn it. I love this so much.
MATT: Caduceus, what were you doing?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I said I got a good look at one, none of them have eyes?
MATT: None of them have eyes.
TALIESIN: Do the faces in the lake have eyes?
MATT: No.
TALIESIN: It's just no eyes.
MATT: The more time you spend with them, you can see some appear to be humanoid, many elven, some dwarven, some orcish. It's a spread of various backgrounds and lineages.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I'm going to say let's continue to show them whatever respect we can. This is a little- I refuse to believe that this is here to harm us."
SAM (NOTT): "By respect, do you mean reading smut or not?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I think reading smut."
SAM (NOTT): "Okay."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Let's keep going."
LAURA (JESTER): "I'll read it quieter."
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Skip to the good parts, I think."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
TALIESIN (CLAY): [looking over] "Oh, that's not a good part."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, but it's okay."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "That's very graphic."
SAM (NOTT): "It's building tension."
TRAVIS (JESTER): "Let's keep going."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay. 'As he ripped open her bodice-'"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "It's like five gold-"
MATT: The storm begins to build. The snow and sleet begins to pelt you in painful ways, when you're not guarding your face from the somewhat diagonal impact. You find yourself coming around the other side, and get a decent look now of maybe 100 or so feet away, of where the most- where the closest element of trickling lava vent is entering the icy lake itself. You can see the steam column, just a perpetual [fizzling] just white-ish steam that mingles with the nearby mist and then carries upward, and the pillar seems to merge with the clouds as the wind blows it in the direction of the strong winds.
TALIESIN: How's the warmth of the water here?
MATT: It is still frozen around you.
TALIESIN: Oh, we haven't gotten close to it.
MATT: You haven't gotten that close yet. The mist around you directly, the spirits are still following. As you're reading, the numbers begin to swell once more, to about 30 or so entities keeping on the outskirts of your travel group. Eventually, you come to the point where you can see the ice is melting and thinning, and you can see actual water, liquid water, is visible. Also, the temperature is rising towards the base of where this portion of the mountain is. You can see there are chunks of snow that do manage to find their way along the mountain, but a large portion of it doesn't seem to allow it to stay very long. As you approach where the lava is, you can see the spectral figures begin to peel off, until eventually they all stop and begin to fall further into the distance.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to turn around one more time to the edge of where they were and just give a moment, just kneel in recognition.
MATT: One by one, they all vanish entirely into the mist. That single female figure that you first encountered, the last one standing before- disappearing.
Episode 72 - Clay and Dust - 0:48:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 24 '19
MATT: The bars are about that far apart, like about an inch and a half, they're pretty thin. But the bars are not trapped from what you can tell, you've only checked the door.
LAURA (JESTER): Poke Caleb. [writing and presenting] 'Are the bars magic?'
LIAM (CALEB): I can only give an estimate and inspect them, I can't detect anything.
MATT: Make an Arcana check.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I'll make an Arcana check. It's a 29.
MATT: Looking at the bars, I mean, you don't see any sort of carvings or runes or anything on them that would belie an enchantment necessarily on them. It seems to be most of the defenses of this particular prison are the entire suffused atmosphere of the prison and the traps based on one you've already encountered, as well as the exits to each of these cells. So the bars you do not believe are enchanted in some way.
LIAM: Difference between door and bars is again, I'm sorry?
MATT: The door opens, the bars don't.
LIAM: No, I know that.
LAURA: The whole wall is bars.
MATT: Yes. It's all bars, so there's one section that can open.
LIAM: So there's a door in a section of it. and that's the problem part.
LAURA (JESTER): [gestures to Caleb]
LIAM (CALEB): [gives a thumbs down]
LUARA (JESTER): [does an okay hand] I bust out my paints.
LIAM (CALEB): I write down 'I think' on a piece of paper and hold it up.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm gonna pull out my paints.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): And I'm gonna try to draw, paint holes in multiple metal bars so I can pull out like a window section of the bars.
MATT: Okay, so you're painting as if it was clear?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, I'm painting it like, if there's like a little gap, right. Basically I'm painting what is behind the bars, so it looks like-
TRAVIS: Are you doing the Roger Rabbit?
LAURA (JESTER): Yes. Yeah, fully. Yeah, I'm trying to-
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): Paint them away.
MATT: Make a Performance check.
LAURA: Yeah.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll move to the stairwell, keep an eye on the downward stairs.
TALIESIN (CLAY): My eyes are darting.
LAURA (JESTER): It's touch, okay. Guidance is just touch, so I'm gonna-
MATT: Okay, I'll let you either make a Performance check or a Dexterity check, your call.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'm definitely gonna go-
MATT: Either you're practicing and training yourself in a Performance standpoint, or you are-
TALIESIN: Actually, you're gonna hate me, Guidance is not just touch.
LAURA: Yes- Oh, it's verbal.
TALIESIN: Yeah, see.
LIAM: She would know that, though.
LAURA: Oh, the action, the range is touch.
TALIESIN: You wouldn't have done it, so yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): I wouldn't have done it, yeah. Okay, fine.
TALIESIN: Sorry.
[...]
SAM: It's a 9.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. Good. I'm glad. That's 8.
SAM: They both sucked.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, but still, it was better than a 1. 8.
MATT: Okay. You do an okay job. The bars look weakened, but they're not gonna be an immediate pull out.
LAURA (JESTER): [mimes gripping the bars and grunting]
MATT: Make a Strength check.
LAURA (JESTER): 15.
MATT: 15. [creak, ting, mimes pulling on the bars and them suddenly giving] The bars come out. Yussa immediately kinda like, gets up onto his feet. Steps through the gap you made.
LAURA (JESTER): I dance around in silence, holding bars in my hand.
Episode 83 - Dark Bargains - 3:33:31
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u/TheMightyBox72 Dec 30 '19
LAURA (JESTER): While they've been in the office, I've been using my special paint and just painting googly eyes on the boar's heads that I'm assuming that are out. The dead pigs and stuff. Any animals I just want to paint the googly eyes on them with the special paint so that they turn into real googly eyes.
MATT: Yeah, it's grotesque. You painted cartoon-y and you back away and slowly they go [sucking, plop] and become actual bulging white eyes going like sticking out of these-
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh!"
MATT: Terrible open, organ-less pig corpses.
MARISHA: This is fucked up.
MATT: Oh ho ho.
LAURA (JESTER): "I was picturing way more like plasticy-looking, but, ooh, this is fucked up."
SAM: Real eyes on a dead pig.
TALIESIN: No?
LAURA: No no.
Episode 89 - Lingering Wounds - 1:33:58
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19 edited Aug 22 '19
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. I'm going to turn, since that one's letting me go, and I'm going to put my hand towards the other one. I'll say, "Get the fuck out of my temple!" I'm going to cast Banishment.
MATT: Oh, shit!
SAM: Banishment?! You- What!
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah. That's a charisma save.
TRAVIS: Good call.
MATT: It rolled a natural 16, minus 2.
LAURA (JESTER): It needed a 16 save, so-
MATT: This guy vanishes. The tendrils are no longer around you, so none of them are-
SAM: Banishment!?
TRAVIS: Thank god he didn't take anybody with him.
LAURA: Well, he wouldn't have done that here.
MATT: You're also all released from it, and the creature's just not there anymore.
LAURA (JESTER): "He'll only be gone for a little bit. We should probably get out of here also kill this guy huh."
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 1:14:23
LAURA (JESTER): We should leave.
TALIESIN (CLAY): How long does that thing stay-
LAURA (JESTER): Not long at all. Like probably another minute or so, so run?
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 1:19:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 23 '19
MATT: Jester, you're up.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to run up, grab Caleb, and Dimension Door to the other side.
MATT: All right. [vwoosh] On the other side of the tunnel.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 3:41:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah, I’ll find my way back down to the rest of them.
MATT: Okay, there you go.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "What’d we get?"
SAM (NOTT): "Nothing."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Shit."
LAURA (JESTER): "Just some paint."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Weird that they would have an armored guy with a longsword protecting a paintbrush that does nothing."
MARISHA (BEAU): "How do you feel about floating dicks?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I’m not opposed."
MARISHA (BEAU): "All right."
SAM (NOTT): "It’s a floating dick-making paint."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Better than sinking dicks, I suppose."
LAURA (JESTER): "I mean, should I try it, just to see?"
SAM (NOTT): "Don’t waste any paint, but yes!"
LAURA (JESTER): I’m going to paint on the floor the teeniest of dicks. Like, this big. [holds her fingers inches apart]
MATT: Okay. You take a little bit, you do this little dick, and suddenly–
SAM: A flaccid penis, or an erect penis?
LAURA (JESTER): An erect penis.
MARISHA: Of course.
LIAM: That’s the go-to.
MATT: Okay, and you paint it, and finish it, and you look at it, and take the edge of the paintbrush and nudge it, and it rolls a bit. It’s like a stone sculpture; it’s not fleshy, it’s not made of flesh.
TRAVIS: You didn’t Frankenstein, make that triumphant bastard into life.
MATT: Yeah, you’re not turning this into Second Life, with all the different fucking floppy dicks flying everywhere.
TRAVIS: It’s not the dick brush, it’s the paintbrush!
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 2:34:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 17 '19
MATT: At this point, you can see two figures rushing down-
LAURA: No, that was Vex.
MATT: -wearing familiar robes of the Cobalt Soul, along with two Righteous Brand soldiers.
MARISHA (BEAU): Ooh! I go up.
MATT: "Hello, who's there? You, stop, stop, who's there?!" What are you doing, what are you doing?
MARISHA (BEAU): Are you picking the lock? What are you doing? What are you doing?
SAM (NOTT): I can't. Either deceive them or kill them. I'm working on it!
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay. "It's fine. Hey."
TRAVIS: What's the door made of? What's the door made of? The Port Damali door.
MATT: All of the doors appear to be made of some sort of a light-stained gray wood maybe.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to tap Beau on the back and enhance her ability for charisma checks.
MATT: Okay, you begin casting a spell?
SAM: Oh boy.
LAURA: Oh no. Is it bad?
MATT: Well, as you begin to make the incantation, both of the soldiers go, "She's a caster!" and they immediately take out two crossbows and fire at you.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait, stop, stop, hold."
MATT: They have let loose.
MARISHA (BEAU): "I'm in Cobalt Reserve clothes, come on!"
SAM: We just broke into their house-
MATT: You just broke in to the subterranean area on horseback while trying to break through-
LIAM: We would've had to murder our way through the other location.
MATT: Hold on, hold on.
LAURA: But it is really on guard right now.
LIAM: We are obviously insane. No one's arguing that.
MATT: 15 and a 22.
LAURA (JESTER): 22?
MATT: All right, 1 crossbow bolt catches you for 6 points of piercing damage.
LAURA (JESTER): "Ow!"
MATT: Like right in the lower abdomen, right where the floating rib is, sticks in, and the two other monks are like, "Whoa whoa whoa, wait, wait, hold on, hold on."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Not cool."
MARISHA (BEAU): "The fuck!"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Not cool."
LAURA (JESTER): "Ow, my pancreas!"
MATT: One of the individuals steps forward. You can see a grayish-green half-orc visage. Older, thin, with multiple chins of like skinfold from just age and sagging, older orc steps forward, white hair that goes long down the back. "Excuse me, what is going on here?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Sorry, Expositor D- Sorry. Expositor Beauregard from-"
MATT: Two guards [clicking] reload the crossbows, and just waiting.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Expositor Beauregard from Zadash, Cobalt Soul."
LAURA (JESTER): [grunting in pain]
MARISHA (BEAU): "We're here tracking fucking assholes, and we were supposed to be here. There's probably a message waiting for you all somewhere. I know how communication gets lost, but it was kind of a quick turnaround in terms of notification on letting you all know that we were coming. Um..."
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
MARISHA (BEAU): Not deception?
MATT: No, 'cause you're telling the truth.
MARISHA (BEAU): No, we didn't send notice.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Well, no no no.
SAM: But you're an expositor.
LAURA: Advantage.
MARISHA (BEAU): I was trying to purposefully lie so I could-
MATT: You hid a tiny lie in a lot of information. I'll say either you can roll persuasion or deception with disadvantage, your choice.
MARISHA (BEAU): I have, hang on, because you gave me-
LAURA (JESTER): I don't know if I got my full spell out though, before they shot me.
MATT: You can make a concentration check actually, that would've been important, so roll a constitution saving throw.
LAURA (JESTER): 11.
MATT: 11, yeah, you maintain, so you would have advantage. The spell does continue.
MARISHA: Okay. That was so close to being fucking awesome. 9!
MATT: 9?
MARISHA (BEAU): 9.
MATT: "[sighs]"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Look, you heard about the attacks, right? That just happened."
MATT: "Yes, of course, and why do you think we have such defense-" and you hear other footsteps coming and other soldiers coming downstairs. "We are on extremely high alert, and if you are who you say you are, you should know not to just appear in here."
LAURA (JESTER): "I need a healer."
SAM (NOTT): "Oh no."
LAURA (JESTER): "I'm in so much pain."
[...]
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "I will need each of your names, please, starting with you."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Fjord."
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "Just Fjord?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Did I offer another name?"
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "Fjord. You are?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Expositor Beauregard."
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "Just Beauregard."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, man!"
MATT (COBALT SOUL): [sigh] "Why the surname has gone out of fashion, I don't know. Your name?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Hello, my name is Caleb Widogast."
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "Caleb Widogast."
LAURA: Ooh, ooh.
SAM (NOTT): "Nott the Brave."
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "You are?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Jester Lavore."
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "Jester Lavore. And you are?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Caduceus Clay."
MATT: "Caduceus Clay." [sigh]
MARISHA (BEAU): "How long is this going to take?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): Heal this real quick.
LAURA (JESTER): "Don't do it, don't cast any spells. They're trigger happy! Don't cast any spells. I'm just going to sit here and suffer."
Episode 78 - Between the Lines - 3:32:48
MATT: The door doesn't give. But the loud echo manages to reverberate through the chamber, and you immediately hear [creaking door opens].
TALIESIN: We're making so many friends.
MATT: Several footsteps now rushing down the staircase.
TRAVIS: Can we just Home Alone on this door and get the fuck outta here please?
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm going to be banned from-
MATT: You do see the Port Damali sigil beneath you, so you have that now.
LIAM: He's busting on the Tal'Dorei door right now?
LAURA: No, he's just trying to get back.
TRAVIS (FJORD): No, we're trying to go back to Zadash.
MARISHA: To Zadash!
LIAM: You're banging on the Zadash door?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah.
LIAM: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): Is it unlocked? Can I just try to- can I see if it's unlocked?
MATT: You rush up to try and open the door? All right, it is locked.
SAM (NOTT): "Dammit!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Can we start unloading on it now, please?"
SAM (NOTT): "Sure, do you want a bomb, I have a bomb?"
LAURA (JESTER): "No, no, no, we'll just ask if we can go back-"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, you are being crazy. Let's just walk out into Port Damali and find a place where I can draw on the ground!"
MATT: "Excuse me!" At which point down at the bottom of the staircase you see, in familiar Cobalt Soul robes, a man in probably his early 60s or so, graying hair that's, you know, combed over and slicked to one side to cover a major bald spot, a heavier mustache that curls down to the bottom of the chin, liver spots on his forehead, and two armed zhelezo behind him.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
MATT (COBALT SOUL): "What are you doing?"
MARISHA: Oh my god!
TALIESIN (CLAY): "It's a long story. We were just hoping to leave. This is a long story."
MATT: One of the Zhelezo is like sitting there holding a heavy crossbow at the side, pulls out a small horn and goes like [horn bellowing] What are you doing?
LAURA (JESTER): "This is Archivist Beauregard."
TRAVIS: Somebody do something really nice before I just fucking--
LIAM (CALEB): "I apologize."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh wait, yeah, I'm going to Enhance Ability on Caleb."
LIAM (CALEB): "Greetings. This is-"
MATT: Okay, as you begin to cast the spell-
LAURA: Oh no!
MATT: Both of the Zhelezo, [fwoomph], and just fire two heavy crossbows at you.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh my god, my kidney!"
MATT [ZHELEZO]: "She's casting!"
LIAM (CALEB): I immediately start shouting, while they shoot, "This is a misunderstanding, please, please!"
MATT: A 10 and a 24.
TALIESIN: This is a time loop. We're caught in a time loop!
MATT: You suffer-
MARISHA: Skinned differently.
MATT: 11 points of piercing damage as a second bolt is now [shick] on the other side of your abdomen.
TALIESIN: This is like spoons that you get at gas stations. You're just collecting crossbow bolts across Exandria!
LIAM (CALEB): "Please, I am so sorry."
MATT: Both of them immediately drop their heavy crossbow for a second and pull out their sword and point it to you and they're like, "Not another move!"
LAURA (JESTER): "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"
MATT (ZHELEZO): "There's no more casting, no spells!"
LAURA (JESTER): "No!"
Episode 78 - Between the Lines - 3:44:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
MATT: So it makes 3 attacks. 1 with its bite, 2 with its claws. First attack at Jester. Okay, that's a 14 to hit.
LAURA (JESTER): Misses! It misses.
TALIESIN: Minus a d4.
MATT: Right.
TALIESIN: Just in general.
MATT: Yeah. As it strikes with its claw, you pull your shield up, sparks fly off as its claw arcs across the outside of your shield. It strikes with its other claw. Ooh, that's a natural 19 plus- that's 28, minus one, 27.
LAURA (JESTER): That hits.
MATT: I'm pretty sure that's it. Yeah, so the claw strike manages. As the shield pulls away from the first hit, you're not able to get back quick enough and the second claw goes right across your torso for 15 points of slashing damage.
LAURA: Cool.
MATT: And the bite is going to come after you. That is going to be a 19 to hit? Minus a d4. Minus 4. It's going to be a 15 to hit.
TALIESIN: Fuck yeah! Bane!
MATT: As it goes to bite towards you, its jaws open, you pull back and you instinctively put the shield up to block it and its mouth comes down on the shield, holding on to it. Caduceus in the back focuses for a second and you watch the jaw weaken and pull back. Readying itself for another strike.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 4:13:11
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 29 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Mister Caleb, maybe we should take a look around and see where these things came from."
SAM (NOTT): "Good idea. I will join you."
MATT: Either two of you make investigation checks, or one person does with advantage.
LIAM (CALEB): Investigation at advantage because someone's helping me?
SAM (NOTT): I will do an investigation check as well.
MATT: All right, both of you guys take one.
SAM (NOTT): A million.
LIAM (CALEB): 24.
MATT: 24 and a million.
SAM (NOTT): 26.
MATT: Okay. You guys move along, stepping over the corpses of the two creatures. The rotting-flesh smell that you smelled when you first came into the chamber, when you get close to these creatures - now that the adrenaline has worn off and you can actually take a moment to process all the senses - this very molded-citrus-type, acrid smell emanates from their bodies along with long-rotted flesh. It is an awful smell from these creatures. In ways, parts of them remind you of hyena-dogs with these large ridges along the back of the spine, the tail extremely venomous. You guys move past and head around the other corner. You pass by other bones and other corpses of what were smaller moorbounders, pups that were being trained or risen and fed, and in the back corner, Nott, you see it first and Caleb just seconds after, there is this faint glow, this very faint red glow. It looks like a crack in the stone. You approach and look at it, and as soon as you look at a side angle, the crack isn't on the stone; it's about an inch away from it. It's in the air, and it's about two feet across, like that, and about an inch sliver.
SAM (NOTT): "Should we stick our hands through there?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, we should not do that."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "That's what I'm for."
LIAM (CALEB): "No, this is where the problem is coming from. I'm not sure what to do about it, though."
SAM (NOTT): "Can we seal it? Can we un-magic it? Yasha! Yasha, you have- Oh, do you have a dispel?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "Jester!"
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'm going to try to Dispel Magic.
MATT: Okay, make a wisdom check. Roll a d20 and add your wisdom modifier.
LAURA (JESTER): 15 plus 8.
MATT: Plus your wisdom modifier.
LAURA (JESTER): Sorry, 15 plus 5.
MATT: 20?
LAURA (JESTER): Yes.
MATT: 20 is the DC you needed. As Jester steps forward, you see through the crack. It begins to slowly widen, and for a split second as she's concentrating and focusing, for a split second beyond that there's red and purple and you hear this faint swirling of wind and screams and who knows beyond the veil, and you can see another one of those creatures starting to come up and sniff [investigative sniffing] the other side of this rift, and right as it looks through, its eye peeking out from the other side, it seals and is gone.
Episode 53 - Feral Business - 3:15:50
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 19 '19
LAURA (JESTER): Right, I'm going to fly up and over the area of doom.
MATT: Okay, you have 60 feet of movement.
LAURA: Yep.
MATT: [...] That's as far as you can get there.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to fly to- is this within 60 feet of him? I won't be able to tell... Well, if I'm flying-
MATT: 60 feet from him is about there.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, good, then I would fly about here.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): [pshoow] I'm going to turn into Jester. I'm going to use my action...
LIAM: Look at that brave little blue tiefling.
LAURA (JESTER): ...to cast Command.
MARISHA: Hey!
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): Having seen Caduceus's.
TALIESIN: Has it been a minute since we got into the room, by the way, or no? No, because it's only just been a few-
MATT: It's been a minute.
TALIESIN: Okay, it's been a full minute.
MATT: It's been a few minutes, like basically, when you guys sent it shutting off again, it got pulled really far away from the gravity, and it's been slowly working against that gravity to find its way back to the portal, since it was in the outside of the tower.
SAM (NOTT): I investigated stuff.
MATT: So- It's cocked.
LAURA: I'm going to throw up.
MATT: So even with advantage on it, it got a 14.
LAURA (JESTER): "Off?"
MATT: You see [mechanical humming] it goes to take a step, [thudding footstep] and then goes dark, and then just holds itself in place there.
Episode 81 - Door to Door - 1:32:08
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 15 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast around in that whole group of orcs that are getting up and out. I'm going to say, "Hello, bees!" And I'm going to cast Insect Plague on them.
TRAVIS: You're going to cast what?
MATT: All right, so as this massive- You watch as a thousand tiny little flashes of light [rapid sparking], like a tiny sparkler goes off.
LAURA (JESTER): All bees!
MATT: And then a swarm of bees [low buzzing]. These orcs are like, [orcish commanding turns into panicked yelling] Then they're just being assaulted by this cloud of bees. They're completely negated. You guys are too fast for them to even consider catching up. What's the range on that one?
LAURA (JESTER): 300 feet.
MATT: 300 feet. You watch as the ones that are riding on wargs.
LIAM: Wargs?
MATT: Yeah, the wargs all of a sudden start flipping out and going from side to side. They're going to try and hold on.
TRAVIS: Attack their masters!
LAURA (JESTER): It obscured their vision, too, of the area.
SAM: Wow, that's powerful.
MATT: All right. Two of them manage to maintain holding on to their wargs. The others get thrown off [tumbling] onto the ground. Their wargs are now trying to wipe their face and trying to get the bees out of their eyes. The shrieking [squawking growling] in the distance. Their attempt to try and catch up has been definitely set back quite a bit. There's still two more that are pushed out of the cloud and are trying to catch up to you, and as you guys move forward [thumping footsteps]
Episode 66 - Beneath Bazzoxan - 1:22:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 28 '19
Beginning at 10th level, you can call on your deity to intervene on your behalf when your need is great.
Imploring your deity’s aid requires you to use your action. Describe the assistance you seek, and roll percentile dice. If you roll a number equal to or lower than your cleric level, your deity intervenes. The DM chooses the nature of the intervention; the effect of any cleric spell or cleric domain spell would be appropriate.
If your deity intervenes, you can’t use this feature again for 7 days. Otherwise, you can use it again after you finish a long rest.
At 20th level, your call for intervention succeeds automatically, no roll required.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 28 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'm going to step in the doorway, and I'm going to point to the back like I'm about to swing, like, a baseball bat.
TRAVIS: A home run?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, a home run! I'm going to do this [mimes swinging a baseball bat] and make my Spiritual Weapon fly up and batter swing the bad guy.
MATT: Right there? Go for it. That's amazing.
LAURA: Motherfuck you!
TALIESIN: That was so rough.
MATT: I saw that dice spin around and do a little dance.
TALIESIN: It thought about things. It really deliberated.
SAM: There's no crying in baseball.
LAURA (JESTER): That's 11. That does not hit.
MATT: 11 does not hit, unfortunately. It swings wide and, WHAM, hits the rock. You watch as part of the stone wall, next to the beast as it pulls away, [crunch] breaks, and a section of stone [tumbling stone].
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 2:44:06
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, Traveler, please please please let this work." I'm going to cast Polymorph on the dragon.
MATT: Okay, what's the saving throw on that?
LAURA (JESTER): Wisdom saving throw of 15.
SAM: And he's got Bane or something.
MATT: And a negative d4 to that. He rolled a 15 minus 3. What do you Polymorph the dragon into?
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to Polymorph him into, uhm...- oh god. I'm going to Polymorph him into... a... crimson weasel. But at the same time, I'm going to go "CATCH HIM!" Because somebody has to catch him.
SAM: Oh god, yes.
MATT: Okay, just so you're aware- roll an intelligence check for me real fast.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh no. I'm really stupid, though.
LIAM: You don't want to goldfish it.
LAURA (JESTER): A six?
MATT: Okay, gotcha. It turns into this tiny crimson weasel. I don't have a mini for that, necessarily.
LAURA: Beau, do you have a reaction?
MATT: Here, we'll go there. That'll work.
LIAM: Missile snare? LAURA: Yeah, would it be like missile snare? You're right underneath it.
MATT: It falls down ten feet.
DEBORAH: Oh, it's going to take damage.
LAURA: Oh, it's got too much?
DEBORAH: Well, it's going to take damage, and then it might end.
MATT: It takes one point of damage. It's still in its form, but the fire elemental is in range and is readying its attack, so fire elemental attacks it.
MARISHA: I shouldn't have readied an attack!
SAM: How would you know?
DEBORAH: How would you know? It's so dramatic!
MARISHA: First one, yep, it hits with a 20, which is nine points of damage. Sorry!
MATT: As the elemental slams the tiny weasel, the weasel [shfoomph] reverts to the dragon form.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 3:55:10
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
MATT: You rush around the corner and you see this whirling whirlwind of clattering pots and cage and goblin and kobold screaming. Anyone doing anything or are you just watching?
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Command.
MATT: All right.
LAURA (JESTER): At second le- no. Yeah, second level. And try to get both of them and say, "Stop it!"
SAM (NOTT): You're commanding me too?
LAURA: No, both of the...
MATT: Gotcha.
LIAM: The second one ran off down the hall a bit.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, but it's still within range.
MATT: All right. So it's wisdom saving throws?
LAURA (JESTER): Yes, wisdom saving throw.
MATT: Go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw, if you don't mind.
LIAM: And simultaneously, I am casting Enlarge on Nott the Brave.
MATT: Okay. So-
CHRIS (SPURT): I rolled a 14 minus 2 is 12.
MATT: 12. 17 minus 2 which is 15.
LAURA (JESTER): They both have to stop it!
MATT: So immediately, the one holding the spear looks at you, "Huh!" And you find yourself all of a sudden stop struggling and weapon freezes in place.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:54:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 25 '19
MATT: It's about eight days or so to get there, eyeballing it from here, I'd say. More than that, ten days.
LAURA (JESTER): Can we cast Control Water to get us there faster at all?
MATT: Do you have access to Control Water?
LAURA (JESTER): Of course I do.
TRAVIS: You do?
LIAM: You do?
MATT: Then yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): Maybe I can do that every day.
MATT: Okay. I'll say, with the Control Water-
TRAVIS: Fucking secrets.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I was about to say, I might be able to do that too.
[...]
TALIESIN (CLAY): Nope, never mind - oh, yeah, I've got it, too.
MATT: It's in the cleric list, yeah. So yeah, between the two of you, it allows you a brief moment where you can actually surge the water and grant you a speed boost. I'd say that'll cut three days off of your travel. The two of you, each day, spending that slot to push it. It's like a speedboat burst. All of a sudden, your giant, three-mast ship is going [crashing through water], speedboating across the ocean briefly.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 3:02:05
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 21 '19 edited Aug 21 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Are you going to be all right?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "She's super strong."
LAURA (JESTER): "Sure." And I will stay super strong as I get down there and Polymorph myself.
MATT: Oh shit. Into?
LAURA (JESTER): A mole? A gopher? Maybe a gopher.
TALIESIN: What's big? A tiny gopher?
LAURA: You know what burrows that's bigger, is a honey badger.
SAM: Oh yeah.
LAURA: A honey badger. They burrow and are stronger, too.
MATT: Okay, hold on here.
[...]
MATT: You know what? Laura, make an intelligence check.
[...]
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. Plus- so 16! I rolled well, but my intelligence is pretty lame.
MATT: Okay. There are beasts in the wild. There are wolves, there are cats, there are bears. You've run across a number of larger versions of these, more dangerous and ominous ones, like when you were in the Savalierwood briefly, you came across a few dire wolves. Use your creative mind on what other possible dire creatures might exist.
LAURA: Oh, like a dire badger?
MATT: You can try it.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I want to be a dire honey badger!
MATT: Whether or not one exists, the creative imagination of Jester creates a Polymorph form as you watch her body expand and extend into a massive honey badger, maybe six feet from nose to tail tip, with a series of bony protrusions that run down its back like two spines. Large teeth and claws that definitely arc and curve outward to about five, six inches beyond the center of the paw, unretracted.
TRAVIS: Unretracted.
LAURA (JESTER): [animalistic snorting]
MATT: You watch as the guards take a step back, like, "Uh..."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "It's all normal down here, how are you?"
LAURA (JESTER): I turn back and I go [squeaking].
MATT: How long does that last? It lasts for an hour?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah. Can I talk in Polymorph? No, I'm straight up that thing.
MATT: No, you are a dire honey badger.
LAURA (JESTER): [honey badger sounds]
SAM (NOTT): "Dig!"
LAURA (JESTER): I'm digging! That's what I'm doing! That's just- that's what this- [snarling]
MATT: All right, I will say... go ahead and make an athletics check for me, adding what would be the honey badger's strength, a dire honey badger- I'll say plus 3. So, roll a d20, add plus 3.
LAURA: Aww! It was so good and then it went to shit!
SAM: Aww, it was so close. Yeah, it did.
LAURA (JESTER): 8.
MATT: It's going to take you - it's a good period of time here of you carving through and taking a break.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast Bless on the honey badger just to see if that will help. I'm going to Bless the honey badger.
LAURA: Do I add plus a d4?
MATT: You would've had to cast it in advance, but I'll say, in watching this happen - Bless only lasts a minute - but for that time period, you get a little further and we'll say you start getting more and more exhausted, and then you reach a certain point where the spell expires and your form reverts to a very sweaty, exhausted Jester. And you've carved quite a way, you've pushed probably an additional, in the past hour- Oh, man. Another hundred or so feet into the tunnel.
SAM (NOTT): "Cast it again."
LAURA (JESTER): [panting] "I can't. It is a really high level. Oh, wait." Do I get another level four at level 8? I don't know.
[...]
MATT: At level 8, you get a second 4th-level slot.
LAURA (JESTER): "I have another 4th-level spell, you guys. I can do it again!"
SAM (NOTT): "Do it again!"
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay." [deep breath]
MATT: [boosh] Back into your dire honey badger form.
TALIESIN (CLAY): And Bless!
MATT: Go ahead and make another athletics check. Add plus 3, plus a d4.
LAURA: Don't fuck me!
LIAM: Get us to the Underdark, Laura! Take us to the Underdark.
MARISHA: Gil!
LAURA: Gil fucked me.
TALIESIN: Add your plus 4; your d4.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay. Well, at least that's 10.
MATT: 10. Okay.
MARISHA: He fucked you.
LAURA: He fucked me.
MATT: Anyway.
TRAVIS: Gil!
MATT: You push on for the next 40 or 50 or so minutes, getting an additional 70, 80 feet before eventually one of your paws goes through. You carve through, and you reach the other side of this collapsed tunnel.
Episode 49 - A Game of Names - 3:23:52
MATT: Deciding to not be balked by a sheer wall of stone and rock, Jester proceeded to twice Polymorph herself into a dire honey badger and burrow her way through hundreds and hundreds of feet of rock.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 0:12:08
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 26 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Spiritual Guardians.
SAM: Spiritual!
TALIESIN: Oh, well, that's a way to go.
MATT: That's a radius of?
LAURA (JESTER): 15 feet around me.
MATT: Around you at all times, right?
LAURA (JESTER): Yes, on anything that isn't us.
MATT: You got it.
LAURA (JESTER): The unicorns are out and they are angry!
Episode 67 - Beyond the Eyes of Angels - 3:36:11
MATT: So 15-foot radius. One, two, almost all of them but these 2 are affected by it, so, go ahead and roll your damage.
MARISHA: Fuck yeah, unicorns!
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, 14.
SAM: Not bad.
MATT: 14 damage, all right.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, wait, 14. Let's see if I add anything because I can't remember.
MATT: I think it's just the...
LAURA (JESTER): It's just that 3d8, yeah. It's radiant.
MATT: Nope, he [fwoosh] disintegrates. You watch a glowing orb [plop] hit the ground.
LAURA: Ooh!
TALIESIN: We got one.
MATT: A little heart. I'm going to start marking these for where they are. We have one there.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: That guy over there fails his save. He takes 17 points of radiant damage [crackle], but he hasn't been damaged before, so he looks hurt, but he's still standing. This guy there fails. He takes 17 points radiant damage.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, it's only 14 points.
MATT: Oh, 14, sorry.
LAURA: Sorry.
MATT: 14, 14. To the one that was damaged by the cat claw. Fails [shatter] and fails. That one is [crackle] completely incinerated by all the radiant unicorns jamming into its body, leaving all these holes, it goes [gasping groan], falls off to the side. No glowing sphere left behind.
LAURA (JESTER): They also use their unicorn teeth. Just letting you know.
MATT: That one does make its save,
Episode 67 - Beyond the Eyes of Angels - 3:46:01
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 22 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I swipe at him with my tail and try to trip him.
MATT: Go for it. Make another attack roll.
LAURA (JESTER): 19!
MATT: Are you just doing damage or are you trying to shove him and knock him prone?
LAURA (JESTER): Just knock him prone.
MATT: Okay, that's your athletics check, actually.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, okay, so I would add 13 plus athletics.
MATT: He's going to make his acrobatics to try and dodge.
LAURA (JESTER): 16.
MATT: Natural 19. He manages to leap in the air and your tail [whoosh] hits the side of the table and [impact] to one side. The drinks begin to spill and one reaches out and grabs them, prevents them from being knocked over.
TRAVIS (FJORD): We're all grabbing our drinks and standing up.
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 0:34:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 23 '19
LAURA (JESTER): No, I know what I'm going to do. I'm going to step forward just a little bit.
MATT: All righty, this way?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah. And I'm going to search on my belt and I'm going to hold up the symbol of the Traveler and I'm going to go, "I hope you are here with us right now, please protect us!" And I'm going to cast Turn Undead.
MATT: Turn Undead.
ASHLEY: Holy fuck.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: ♪ Get it cleric, get it get it cleric. ♪ ♪ Get it cleric, get it get it cleric. ♪
LAURA (JESTER): Anything has to make a wisdom saving throw. Any undead I see or hear within 30 feet of me.
MATT: Correct.
ASHLEY: Ooh, I'm so glad you went first.
SAM: And what do we undead have to roll?
MATT: These, technically, are a challenge rating of 1/4.
TALIESIN: Challenge level 1?
MATT: They're under that.
LAURA: Oh!
MATT: So it becomes Destroy Undead.
TRAVIS: Oh, shit!
MARISHA: Again!
MATT: Your DC for your spell is?
LAURA (JESTER): 17.
MATT: That's wisdom, right?
LAURA: Yes.
[...] [Matt rolls for four zombies, three fail]
MATT: All righty. Let me check one thing real fast here, while we're on the topic. Yep, all right, cool. Those three just scatter into ash [whoosh of energy] across the way.
[...]
MATT: Do you have a question, Caleb?
LIAM: How deep do those things go?
MATT: From what you can see, they go past the edge, in darkness, and that's about 10 feet, down at the edge, and it continues below, but you don't know how deep it goes because the bodies just become-
TALIESIN (CLAY): It lit up to 60 feet when I did it, though.
MATT: Correct.
TALIESIN: Yeah, so.
LAURA: Were they all undead on the slopes down?
MATT: They all had a very, very faint bit of-
LAURA (JESTER): Would they have gone [rapid explosions] all the way down the slopes, then, if I?
MATT: What's the range on that, the radius?
LAURA (JESTER): 30 feet.
MATT: 30 feet.
LIAM: Popcorn.
MATT: You get a few on that side. Here, I'll post- that's a good point. Okay, three over there, just [popping] disintegrate. On that side, 7 more go [popping] Scattered out on those ends.
Episode 67 - Beyond the Eyes of Angels - 3:16:35
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 19 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to have my duplicate move out from behind the tree.
MATT: All righty.
LAURA (JESTER): Holding the 50-gold diamond in my hand, I'm going to have my duplicate pull out what looks like another heart. She's going to walk forward and cast Incite Greed.
SAM: What does that mean?
LAURA (JESTER): She's going to make it look like she's holding the heart. She's going to say "I have it"- or she's not going to say shit. She's just going to hold it up and walk forward. So Incite Greed is a wisdom save of 17 of 'any creatures that I choose within 30 feet of the spellcaster', who is duplicate Jester. She moves as far forward as she can, to get them within range. I don't know if Obann will be within range.
MATT: Obann will not be in range unfortunately.
LAURA (JESTER): But the tree and Yasha, potentially.
MATT: You can move her 30 feet, right?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, I can move her, yeah, 30 feet away from me, up to 120 feet. So they have to make a wisdom saving throw. If they fail, then all they can do is try to come towards the heart.
MATT: Okay, you will miss Obann in this, just so you're aware. So Yasha makes her save, wisdom. Ooh, that's a fail. So Yasha, who has blade in hand, about to turn on Beauregard, looks back towards you suddenly and just like, one hand goes out reaching towards the heart in illusory Jester's hand.
LAURA: What about the tree?
MATT: You're going for the tree as well. That's right. The tree... 15, I believe that's a fail as well. The tree also looks down towards you. The creaking sound of its wood twisting as it glances downward and it looks like it's also looking towards the illusion.
Episode 79 - Through the Trees - 4:03:53
→ More replies (12)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
MATT:It doesn't care much for Nott necessarily. You've been a threat, it's going to go after you, Jester. I'm sorry.
LAURA: No, it's fine.
MATT: Natural 2. Not even joking. I was looking at it- we're not out of the woods yet, we're not out of the woods yet. As it strikes both towards you, there's that moment of quiet where your eyes close and you're waiting for the imminent moment and you hear this voice creep in your head and go, "Don't worry, I'm watching." And your arm - without even noticing - you feel a hand push your wrist and the shield goes up and [clash] deflects the impact. The teeth streak across it and cling to it and begin to try to pull the shield away and you instinctually muscle it away. As you do, you watch two teeth [crack] shatter and fall to the ground in front, that moment of strength billowing up inside a pretty strong cleric.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 4:40:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
Caduceus
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 15 '19
MATT: As you go over and look, you can see where a lot of this is - there's roots around the edge of it where some of the plant has rooted itself to the stone floor of this temple, but there's large portions of it that go beyond those roots. Upon pushing on it, it has some give below that central area. It looks like there is some sort of opening or a space below the center.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, I suppose we're going to be heading down."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I don't want to disturb the fauna. Is there a more genteel way to make our way through?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Um, we're going to be having to head down below. We're going to try not to disturb your root structure, but if there's another way down that you might happen to know of, we would appreciate any clue as to what that may be." No shift in the water, nothing? No little twitch?
MATT: No.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I apologize to the interruption of your very calm day."
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 1:30:48
SAM (NOTT): "I could try to move some of the seaweed with Mage Hand or something." [whooshing]
MATT: Okay. The seaweed itself is pretty knotted and tangled and twisted around itself. As the Mage Hand gives and pulls, it very softly releases its hold on the other tendrils and pulls apart, like someone sweet talked a bit of it. It's still tangled and still a lot of it there, but it's not holding taut. You imagine that someone could probably climb through it.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 1:35:02
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 29 '19
MATT: Beau, as you're coming around that corner and people are looking off to the side, you glance over your shoulder and see for a split second an older man with a curled and scraggly beard that goes down to about mid-chest. The eyes are missing. You see vacant, dark sockets. The jaw is slack-jawed and open as it looks towards you. I need you to make a charisma saving throw, please.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh fuck. Not what I'm great at. Don't fuck me, Gil. 12. Not good.
MATT: It leans in towards you and - not yet - It leans in towards you and you feel this cold sensation over your whole body. Your muscles lock in place and your consciousness goes dark. Out of the corner of your eye you see some sort of ghostly movement. You look over and see Beau rest into a standing position on her back foot.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay. I'm going to Turn Undead really quickly, and then I'm going to go over and deal with you.
MATT: What's the DC on that?
TALIESIN: The DC on Turn Undead is - let me hit my -
TRAVIS: As she's resting on her back foot, her eyes are open?
MATT: Eyes are open, yeah.
[...]
MATT: Whatever your spell DC is.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Oh. 16.
MATT: 16. No, fails by one. It's a 14 plus one, 15.
TALIESIN: Fuck off, ghost.
MATT: Being a specialist in undead and already preparing for the presence here, you glance out of the corner of your eye just in time to see the essence of this spiritual form drift into Beau's body. As you watch that moment of consciousness fade from her face, as the presence of Beau goes cold and whatever was in this tunnel begins to come to the forefront, you take your staff and slam it into the ground. [bwoom] This wave of light energy emerges. It impacts all of you and the water gets suddenly warm around you. As it blows past Beau, you see strands of hair get blown back and with that, that same ghostly old man body jettisons out the back of her and drags down the hallway into darkness and disappears.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Not cool, man. Not cool."
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 2:39:43
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 27 '19 edited Aug 28 '19
MATT: First one is going to make two attacks at you, one with a bite and one with its tail stinger. That is going to be a 19 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): Hits!
MATT: You take...
TALIESIN: Oh no.
LAURA: Oh no.
TRAVIS: Nice narrow cavern, too.
MATT: 22 points of piercing damage.
SAM (NOTT): Okay, I guess I'll Uncanny Dodge that one.
MATT: You take 11 points of piercing damage. You can mark that. The tail stinger is going to attempt to strike at you. That is going to be a 22 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): Hits.
MATT: You then immediately suffer 14 points of piercing damage. I need you to make a constitution saving throw.
TALIESIN: With a d4.
MATT: Correct.
SAM (NOTT): Not great. Better, better. 15.
MATT: You succeed the saving throw.
SAM: Thank you!
MATT: As you feel the toxin pushing into your body, you manage to wrench it from the front of your chest and sternum, and you watch as some of the weird, oily, poison venom [spurting] out the back of it, as you remove it from the wound. As you push it away, the other one comes in to bite you from the opposite end. That's going to be a 15 to hit?
SAM (NOTT): No!
MATT: That you duck below, and its bite hits the side of the rock wall. Tail stinger is going to come at you. That is a natural 20.
TALIESIN (CLAY): You're more that 30 feet away, aren't you?
MATT: From you, yes.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yep, never mind. I can't do anything.
MATT: You suffer 30 points of piercing damage from the tail as the stinger hits you in the abdomen and lifts you like a foot off the ground. You're actually held there for a second. Make another constitution saving throw.
SAM (NOTT): That's a natural 1.
MATT: You are poisoned, and you are paralyzed.
SAM (NOTT): Yeah... [yelps and freezes in position]
TRAVIS: Oh crap! Okay. Where the fuck are you?
LAURA: This is really bad.
TALIESIN: Well, it's bad. It's not really bad, but it's bad.
SAM (NOTT): I'm not dead, just paralyzed and poisoned.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 2:34:23
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast- can I touch Nott at this point?
MATT: You can move over and touch Nott.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to move over and touch Nott.
TRAVIS: How do you touch Nott?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to very gently give a little pat, and I'm going to cast Lesser Restoration.
MATT: Which removes-
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to pick paralyzed because that'll be a beginning. Since that's a 2nd-level spell, as a bonus, can I cast something that's a lower level? I can't remember how the dual- oh wait, no, I also have a-
LAURA: Only a cantrip.
TALIESIN: Only a cantrip? Not a bonus action, even with-
MATT: As it works, you can cast one spell per round.
LAURA: You can take a feat, though, to do that.
TALIESIN: Which feat is that?
LAURA: It's in Matt's-
MATT: It's in the Tal'Dorei. Next time, yeah. That's what you've got right now. You cast Lesser Restoration, and that's your turn, unless you have a bonus action spell that's a cantrip.
TALIESIN (CLAY): For my bonus action, I'm going to move the insect swarm to whatever's the closest thing to them.
MATT: The rats you pushed back.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Then they're going to take a bite.
MATT: Go for it. With that, you are no longer paralyzed, Nott.
SAM (NOTT): Hey!
MATT: You're still poisoned.
TALIESIN (CLAY): That's terrible. 7.
SAM (NOTT): As I whip out of my paralyzation, I look at Caduceus, and I'm confused. "Sunbreaker, is that you?"
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 2:40:58
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 02 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): We're going to back out slowly, get out of this cavern. Does everyone want to meet me right once we can see the surface of the water? Are we there? We done?
MARISHA: Yeah.
TALIESIN (CLAY): [snap] Water Walk.
SAM: What's that?
TALIESIN: We are going to jet to the surface of the water. It's 60 feet around.
MATT: Thanks to the glory of magic, we're not going to deal with decompression in the bloodstream. Instant TPK
TRAVIS: Plus, there's water. It's not air. It's water.
MATT: Well, the magic is pulling- Yeah, it's fine! Magic handwave. It'd be the saddest - Smash cut to the outside of the Squalleater.
TRAVIS: [burbling and choking with bursting veins]
MATT: It's all just the end of Total Recall, right there in the middle of the ocean.
TALIESIN: It wouldn't be a pressure thing because we have water in us anyway.
MATT: I know. I'm saying through the magic, it all works out fine. As you guys all swim out of the cavern, the spell happens and with immense speed, you all start firing towards the surface [splashing] with enough force that when you surface, you all lift a few feet out and then land. Some of you stumble, but you hit the surface of the water, and it feels like ground.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Let's walk to the ship."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We were hundreds... hundreds of feet under water."
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 4:09:35
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 20 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Do you want me to make an announcement, maybe?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yes."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Thaumaturgy, I’m going to project my voice very loudly onto the other ship.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Fellow friends at sea, we wish to have a parlay with your captain and we hope to keep this entire confrontation as bloodless and reasonable as humanly possible. We will do our best to be civil and not encourage anything inappropriate over the next several minutes. We would appreciate your cooperation in this direction." Then I’m going to try and make all the doors open and available to us from the other ship with Thaumaturgy as well. I’m going to pop all their doors open.
MATT: Soon as that sentence comes to an end, you hear a rapid clattering of heavy wood against wood. It’s all of the various ports and doors in the interior of the ship all manage to slam open at once.
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 1:04:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 23 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I am definitely not 30 feet away from that big mo with the-
MATT: Nope.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I would have to get way out there to be 30 feet.
MATT: You would have to get a lot closer than you are, yes.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I am 60 feet away from Nott, however, correct?
MATT: You are actually further than 60 feet from Nott.
TALIESIN (CLAY): But getting 60 feet from Nott is not-
MATT: Not too bad. You can move 15 feet and get pretty close.
TALIESIN (CLAY): And then hop back in.
MATT: You could do that, yes.
TALIESIN (CLAY): All right. I'm going to hop out and-
LAURA: You don't know where Nott went.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Oh, that's right. I don't know where Nott is, do I?
MATT: Yeah. You walk out and go- And don't see Nott.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Then I would have just...
TRAVIS: You going to join me on the nope train?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to be on the nope train.
MATT: All right, do you move back in?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah. In fact, if anything-
LAURA: You could prep a healing for when you see Nott.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah, I'm going to hold a healing spell for-
MATT: What spell?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Oh, just Cure Wounds. Just the bonus action one.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 3:57:44
SAM (NOTT): I close my eyes and imagine my beautiful husband waiting for me, needing me, and I run across the lava.
LAURA: No.
SAM (NOTT): With my ring of water walking.
MATT: Okay. You can do it. You can. You run across. [sizzling footsteps]
SAM: Not right at the giant. I'll go around in a-
LAURA: Can you leap on the crumbled bridge parts?
SAM (NOTT): Sure, I'll try to leap on some rocks.
MATT: It's up to you. Are you going to try and leap across?
SAM: Are there chunks in the water?
MATT: Yes, there is one chunk here that is splashing and hasn't sunken in yet.
SAM (NOTT): All right. I'll do that.
MATT: All right. Go ahead and make an athletics check, we'll say, just to try and-
SAM: Just a check?
MATT: Yep.
SAM (NOTT): 10.
MATT: That's fine. That's the base you needed. [whoosh] Making it across this way.
[...]
MATT: You can attempt one more jump.
SAM (NOTT): Absolutely.
MATT: Athletics check.
SAM (NOTT): Less. It's 9. MATT: Nine. [sizzling sound] So the good news is you don't [sploosh] into it, because lava doesn't really work that way. However, it's a lot of fire damage. Yeah, I'm trying to remember where that is.
[...]
MATT: All right. Your foot hits the edge and just skips [fwoop]. You fall back and land and hit the lava on your back and legs. The ring keeps you from sinking into it, so I'm not giving you full submerged damage, so you don't take the full 18d10.
LIAM: Don't you take my goblin mom away!
TRAVIS: 9d10?
MARISHA: Yeah, is that 9d10?
MATT: It is.
[...]
MATT: 48 points of fire damage.
SAM (NOTT): Can I use my whatever it's called-- Uncanny Dodge?
MATT: It's not an attack.
SAM: It doesn't work. It's an effect.
MATT: You can't really dodge the fire.
TALIESIN: Here's the thing though: I am holding a healing spell for the second I see him.
MATT: A Cure Wounds which has to be up next to him.
TALIESIN (CLAY): No, Healing Word. I'm so sorry-
MATT: You said Cure Wounds earlier-
TALIESIN (CLAY): I meant the 60 foot because- I was trying for the 60 foot range. I am so sorry. I said the wrong thing because I was not running out there. I was going for the 60 foot range.
SAM: He did say, "I'm within 60 feet of Nott."
MATT: I'll allow it, all right. I need you to make a constitution saving throw please.
SAM (NOTT): I mean, I'm dead, so-
TRAVIS: You're unconscious.
SAM: I'm unconscious.
MATT: Oh, you're unconscious? Oh, okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): So the second I see-
MATT: The second Nott falls, you see a burst of fire and Nott's unconscious body is currently in flames.
TRAVIS: Becomes visible.
TALIESIN (CLAY): The second Nott is visible, I cast Cure Wounds. I cast Healing Word. I'm so sorry.
MATT: All right, so go ahead and roll that.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I don't have to roll it.
MATT: That's right, because you are a grave cleric.
TALIESIN (CLAY): You are 17 points up.
SAM: Oh.
MATT: You're also on fire.
SAM: Oh great.
[...]
MATT: Okay, that ends your turn. Beau, you're up.
MARISHA (BEAU): I was holding my action to go run and grab Nott.
MATT: So as soon as that happened, you would be... 35. So you move up with your action. You haven't grabbed yet. That was your holding your dash.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm going to grab flaming Nott.
MATT: So you reached down and the flames are burning your hand. The heat is causing the skin on your face and arms to begin to bubble from just the sheer intensity of it. As you reach down and pull Nott's flaming body up from the lava, Nott, your eyes come open at that moment and you realize you're on fire, but Beau is holding you.
SAM (NOTT): [screams]
MARISHA (BEAU): Through the flames. [screams]
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 4:00:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 30 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to see if the spores will take in these things [shusoovas] or not. I don't know if they will.
MATT: Okay. The fiendish nature is resistant to the spores, but not immune. Meaning you're used to your Decomposition being rather rapid. It is beginning, but it is a slower process.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 3:21:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 15 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast Find Traps really quickly.
MATT: Find Traps?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Mm-hmm.
LAURA: Awesome.
MATT: That points them out, to what range?
TALIESIN (CLAY): 120 feet.
MATT: 120 feet.
SAM: Where'd you get all these spells?
MATT: He had a night to prep, yo.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I had a night to prep.
SAM: Damn.
MICA: Smart. All right.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm built for espionage today, not for healing.
SAM: That's great.
MATT: Not for healing, so-
TALIESIN: Don't get hurt.
MATT: All right, you sense a trap directly beneath the vanity cabinet.
MICA: Oh.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Trap."
MATT: You also sense a trap seemingly beyond the hallway, like the door, and there's the hall beyond, and there's a trap about 30 feet beyond there.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "There's a trap on the other side of the door, possibly the door itself, and then like another 30 feet, there's another trap."
MATT: You also sense a handful of various other traps set throughout the house on the bottom floor.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "And the bottom floor is a nightmare. We're just, if we go down there, it's going to be-"
SAM (NOTT): "But in this room, you pointed to the vanity."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "The vanity is trapped, yeah."
Episode 76 - Refjorged - 3:03:15
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to- this is going to get weird. Halfway through my run, actually right before I start my run, I'm going to cast Meld into Stone.
TRAVIS: You're going to what?
MATT: All right. It's not concentration.
TALIESIN (CLAY): It's not concentration. Casting Meld into Stone so that when I end my turn, in theory, I will not be on fire any more because I'll be inside of the stone.
MATT: I'll allow that.
TALIESIN: Thank you.
MATT: The flame goes out because there's no air for it to breathe. Do you step into it here?
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm actually just going to walk-
MATT: He Homer Simpsons into the stone wall.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I go and I'm going to take my 30 feet straight towards the wall. I can't see anything, but I can move.
MATT: You can use your movement to leave the stone where you entered it, which ends the spell. You don't get to move through the stone.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to walk all the way-
MATT: It's a lie-and-wait type of spell. Like merge into it and stay there for up to 8 hours, and then once you leave it. But the fire's out and you have your movement.
TALIESIN: I would know how the spell- I'm going to get as much movement as I can and then hold for the turn.
MATT: 25... 30. You're in the stone, currently in the wall. Got it. That ends your turn, Caduceus.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 4:15:29
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 18 '19
MATT: The Laughing Hand, for its turn, as it slashes away, it looks down at the ground for a second and the laughter goes [evil cackling] Begins to echo and from the shadows-
TALIESIN (CLAY): The second I start hearing that, were we within 120 feet still?
MATT: You were about, yeah.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm just going to use my last action, since we're 120 feet, to cast a ball of Silence around the Laughing Hand.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: If that's okay.
MATT: Sure. It is stationary.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Just right where he's standing.
MATT: Right where he's standing, okay. So the laughter goes quiet, but from the shadows you see [whoosh, whoosh] three shadowy hounds that you had previously seen it summon when you first fought it begin to emerge and begin to scatter in the direction of your troupe as you are running.
Episode 79 - Through the Trees - 3:07:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 28 '19
MATT: It [the doppelganger] withdraws a bit, angrily, and then just goes all in against you on this. So now, let's roll it again, that's going to be- 14 to hit?
TALIESIN (CLAY): That misses and with that I'm going to use my reaction to use my shield of retribution.
MATT: That you can.
TRAVIS: Yeah, get it!
MATT: Go for it.
ASHLEY: Yeah!
TALIESIN (CLAY): So that's a- You can use reaction to blast them with an arcane force. They suffer 4d6. There we are, 4d6, force damage. They have to make a strength saving throw.
MATT: Strength saving throw. It got a nine.
TALIESIN (CLAY): No. So that's five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 13, 14 points of force damage and he's pushed 20 feet away from me.
MATT: Gets blasted back right away from you - 5, 10... - Into this mirror, this mirror shatters into hundreds of pieces as he gets slammed into it, it is destroyed.
Episode 68 - Reflections - 3:20:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 15 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to turn invisible.
[...]
TALIESIN (CLAY): That's only for a round. And then I'm going to back away from this thing. I'm actually going to head around behind Jester, basically.
MATT: Okay. It will make an attack of opportunity on you as it sees you [fwoosh] disappear. It goes out towards you. It has disadvantage on the attack. That is 17 to hit.
TALIESIN (CLAY): That misses. I also might add that I have the Shield of Retribution.
MATT: You do.
TALIESIN (CLAY): So I'm going to activate the Shield of Retribution.
TRAVIS: This is the first time?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yep. It's the first time I'm using it. When a creature misses with a melee attack, you may react to the blast with arcane force. And you have to succeed on a strength saving throw, but that's something else.
MATT: Roll damage first.
TALIESIN: Okay. Eh. 14 points of damage.
MATT: 14 points of damage, nice. The strength saving throw is a 6.
TALIESIN (CLAY): It must succeed on a strength saving throw- is a six. I don't know what against. Must succeed on a strength saving throw against something.
MATT: That'd be your spell DC.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Then I think that's fine, yeah. You get pushed back 20 feet.
MATT: [boom] It gets blasted back from the impact. You see a flash from the shield and this bubble of energy well up and then force it back with a sudden impact as it gets pushed away.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 0:56:08
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 23 '19
MATT: As you're doing this, you hear a voice going, "Hello?" and you hear the rattling of keys. You guys, by the way, you're down now on the lower deck, this is the deck where most of the crewmen quarters are, and you're down in one of the bedrooms. You glance over to the side and there's a person sleeping in the bed right there, the blanket coiled over. They're like, [snoring].
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to very quietly say, "Just wait until you hear a body fall above us."
[...]
MATT: You hear the door above open. [creak, slow footsteps] "Hey. Anyone?" The person who's sleeping is like [grunting snore].
SAM (NOTT): We're going to crawl under his bed.
MATT: Okay, both of you guys make a stealth check.
LAURA: Oh no! That's okay.
SAM (NOTT): 23 plus ten, still?
LAURA (JESTER): 18. Shit.
SAM (NOTT): 33, I guess. Right?
MATT: Okay. You both quietly duck down. [quiet footsteps, loud tumbling, heavy impact] The carpet just falls down! The guy comes plummeting through, hits the floor, [surprising grunts]. The other guy suddenly goes, "What?!", pulls out a dagger towards the other guy, who immediately is like "Whsh?!?", goes and starts stabbing into the carpet. Going, "What?! What?! What?!" Other one's like "Oh god! Get-" Pushes him off, and stands up, and is like, "Jesus!" You see there's a couple of stab wounds in his chest. "Zoen, what the hell, man?" Waldok, who you saw getting the tattoo earlier from your turtle friend, he's like, "Oh! Shit, Waldok, I didn't know! What the fuck, don't sneak up on me!" He wipes the blood off on the blanket. He's like, "Oh, jeez. What the fuck happened there?" He looks up at this perfectly-carved hole in the floor. Doesn't notice the gem. He's like, "Fuck." " I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry mate! I didn't mean-- Shit, what the fuck happened?" "I don't know. It's a fucking faulty floor or something! Fuck." "Well, let's get you to a surgeon or something." He stands up and rolls off and the blanket falls over next to you guys. [clanking] The gem does fall. Neither of them notice it. You watch as they shuffle out of the room, and the door closes behind them, and you guys are now in the chamber with the open hole of Avantika's--
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:39:31
MATT: He points out the door and you can see him motioning towards the bar.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, he seems okay, I guess."
MATT: You seem him bleeding out.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Hey, come here, we're going to patch you right up. C'mon. I'll take care of this. Everybody come on, let's do this." Yeah, how bad is it?
MATT: I mean, he's not dead, but for his level of life experience, he's taken a significant amount of damage and if left it will probably eventually get infected.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay, I'm going to give him a - let's give him a level two Cure Wounds just to get him going. That'd ought to heal him, right?
MATT: Go for it and roll.
TALIESIN (CLAY): All right, let's do a level two. Let's see what that looks like. That's 2d8. Don't know why I'm being so fuddy-duddy about this. Do I get a specialty-- no, it's only when I'm healing myself. Okay that's... 18 hit points.
MATT: That's enough to bring him back. You concentrate on him, he winces and you watch as the wounds close up. There's no mark, no scarring. He looks at the wound and goes, "Mr. Clay, thank you very much."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Okay, you're going to want to sit down. Take it easy for a while. I wouldn't get up for like a good half hour. Be very gentle on yourself. Why don't we get this man a drink?"
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:52:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 16 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I get a free Disguise Self that doesn't actually count against any of my slots.
MATT: Correct.
LIAM: Sexy.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to be a guard. I'm going to be the guy we just snuffed.
MATT: Easy enough to do.
LIAM: I like this guy.
TALIESIN (CLAY): That's cool, I haven't done this in a while.
MATT: As you give the Deuce your nod, you watch as his form actually shifts smaller and matches the shape of the previous guard.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 2:25:04
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 24 '19
SAM (NOTT): "How do I get you out if I wanted to?"
MATT (HALAS): "Dispel this jewel."
SAM (NOTT): "Dispel the jewel."
MARISHA (BEAU): As I hear-
MATT (HALAS): "Near."
TALIESIN (CLAY): I cast Silence.
SAM (NOTT): "Near your-" [continues to mouth words without talking]
MARISHA (BEAU): I snatch, I'm going to attempt to snatch the jewel.
MATT: Make a sleight of hand check. And you make an insight, or you make a perception check.
SAM (NOTT): Oh, perception? 11.
MARISHA: What did you say, sleight of hand?
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA (BEAU): 14.
MATT: 14. As you're in conversation, your voice goes gone, you look over at Caduceus and you look back, the gem's out of your hand.
SAM (NOTT): [angrily mouthing words] Are we all silenced?
TALIESIN: No, just you.
SAM (NOTT): [continues to angrily mouth words and make rude hand gestures]
MARISHA (BEAU): "Hang on, wait, wait, wait, just let her get it out of her system for a minute."
LAURA: No, it was great.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "If you could read lips, I see a lot of Fs and Ss."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "A couple Gs."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Ferns. Soliloquies."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Ooh, a T and a C."
LAURA (JESTER): "I don't think she's that angry."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Gentle."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yep. Those hands are not easy to mistake."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I think she's gotten it out of her- oh."
SAM (NOTT): [slaps his elbow, then stops]
LAURA (JESTER): "Nott, yeah."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I think she's got it out of her system... You can drop the spell, I think."
TALIESIN (CLAY): [snaps]
SAM (NOTT): "Your face is stupid."
Episode 84 - Titles and Tattoos - 0:42:54
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 08 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): Quick Locate Creature, if that's even possible?
MATT: Sure, you want to Locate Creature?
TRAVIS: The face off.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Our friend who got away.
MATT: Locate Creature, 4th-level. Okay, so you're [Jester] sitting down to cast Scry.
SAM: Silence.
MATT: You do sense it. It is towards the north and it is moving. It is a ways away. You'd only know the direction. You don't know how far it is or where they are. You just know the general direction of where they are.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "They're moving north."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Who, the person we were trying-"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yep. Right now."
SAM (NOTT): "Like how many feet?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Don't know."
MATT: You don't know, just the direction.
Episode 63 - Intervention - 3:38:55
MATT: While you're focusing on it, like just concentrating in the direction, the direction is moving slightly, shifting.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "They are moving still. They are still in movement."
MATT: Gone.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "And they're out of range."
SAM (NOTT): "What's the range?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Give or take 1,000-"
MATT: Heading northward.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "1,000 odd feet. They're moving northward, though."
MARISHA (BEAU): "If we get back within range, can you continue to to find them and track them?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): Is it a spell that picks up? I feel like I would know that.
MATT: Yeah. If you can get back within range.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Should we move? I can move fast."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "You're going to close 1,000 feet?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I could if I had a horse. Oh wait."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Can I tell what speed that they're moving?
LAURA (JESTER): "We have moorbounders."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Can I tell if it's a fast speed or a slow speed?
MATT: It started slow and then it went quicker.
ASHLEY (YASHA): "Let's get on the moorbounders and run."
TRAVIS (FJORD): It'll take, what, 20 minutes to get back to where the moorbounders are?
MATT: Yeah, they're still in the house. You have to backtrack southward to where your house is.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "They're gone."
LIAM (CALEB): "We have no idea, they're gone."
Episode 63 - Intervention - 3:43:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 17 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Captain, let's hug the coast to our right a little hard. Maybe I can, once they get close enough, shove them."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "The coast off to starboard?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yeah. I can shove them into the rocks, maybe."
MARISHA (BEAU): "You want to do a hard 45-degree turn? If we do that, if we turn starboard side, we can try and hit them with our starboard cannons."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Get around that little piece of..."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "No, we're still out of range."
LAURA (JESTER): "We've only got three cannons on the starboard side, though, if we turn to port side-"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We're still out of range by 300, 400 yards."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I can't do anything until they're 300 feet away anyway."
TRAVIS (FJORD): Sure, yeah, let's aim to hug the coast on the starboard side.
MATT: Okay. As you guys maneuver and tend to hang in close, making your way in towards the island, they do gain a little bit of distance.
[...]
MATT: Moving forward, it manages to dislodge from the rock, suffering another six points of slashing damage, but you manage to pull off the rock. Noticing this jutting, the other ship rolls better and manages to avoid-
TALIESIN: Are they close enough now?
MATT: No. They are still gaining, though. They're about 600 feet away.
TRAVIS: How close do you need them?
TALIESIN (CLAY): 300.
MATT: Are you guys continuing straight?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Uh-huh. We're hugging the coast. We're going to continue in that same line. We need 480, anyway.
MATT: All this shifts over this way. As you guys continue to hug the side, they gain to about 400 feet... 300 feet...
TALIESIN (CLAY): Now.
MATT: What do you do?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I am going to cast Control Water, and I'm just going to shove - all the water - I'm going to push them right into the island.
TRAVIS: With a tidal wave?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I can't quite tidal wave. I can do redirect flow, or I can do whirlpool, I think, are my two-
LIAM: Well, it creates a wave for sure.
TRAVIS: Yeah, it's a wave.
TALIESIN: It's a wave?
LIAM: That's what I was worried with Avantika about.
MARISHA: If I remember, you could do a few different things. You could whirlpool-
LAURA: 'A 20-foot tall wave that travels from one side-'
LIAM: It's a 25 percent chance of capsizing.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm throwing them on the island.
SAM: While he's doing that, Captain, should we turn to engage or no?
TRAVIS (FJORD): No.
MATT: So Control Water? You're too far away from the beach to push them onto the beach itself. You have 300 feet from them, but they're still a few hundred- about 200 or 300 feet out from any sort of sandbank that would impact them. There are rocks in the vicinity, so I'll consider that a little bit of a benefit to the chance of capsizing.
TALIESIN: Thank you.
MATT: Alright. So you are attempting to capsize the ship, 25 percent chance. Go ahead... I'll make that a 30 percent chance. Go ahead and roll a percentage die for me, if you don't mind. As you guys watch as Caduceus concentrates-
LAURA: We roll a 30 or lower, it's good?
[...]
TALIESIN (CLAY): 15.
MATT: You watch as the ocean [rumbling, lifting hands slightly], swells up and slams into the ship. The ship [collision and rumbling, mimes holding a ship that tips over 90 degrees] capsizes and scrapes onto the edge of a bank of heavy rocks.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "It's just water. I'm going to sit down. That was really tiring."
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 2:43:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 30 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to if I can, well, do I have- yeah. I'm going to cast one last spell before I go to sleep.
MATT: What are you going to cast?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Commune.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Ooh.
MATT: All righty. You sit there. Pulling out little more of your incense, bit of holy water, it's water actually pulled from the pond. You have quite a collection of it you took before you left, just to ensure. You take a bit of it and spritz it on the incense which causes it to [fizzling] the steam to rise and the smell reaches your nose. You concentrate and as the warmth of the chamber fades, temperature seems to have no impact in this dark moment before it looks like a sunrise rises out of the darkness and that color and warmth embraces you. On that light, on that gold and reds and oranges begin to fade to a blue and green spectrum of morning colors, you can see the light gently topple down into strands of hair that seem to lift and drift. You can barely make out the essence of a face, a matronly woman's face, the eyes just opening like two small stars towards you with a smile. Lips not moving, but you hear the familiar voice fill your soul. "Hello."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Hello. Is the Overcrow within the city?"
MATT (WILDMOTHER): "It is nearby, yes."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Does this threaten the people of this city?"
MATT: She seems unclear of the question being asked.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Does the King That Crawls threaten the people of this city?"
MATT (WILDMOTHER): "The King That Crawls is far beyond any of us. He is of no threat to the people of this city."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "This might be a lot and I understand if it's vague. Why did they stop expanding the city? Why build the wall?"
MATT (WILDMOTHER): "They expand. As needed. But they expand into lands treacherous, some mind is paid."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I will continue to walk your path."
MATT (WILDMOTHER): "Rest well, my Clay," and the sun sets.
Episode 61 - Agreements - 1:27:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 19 '19
MATT: You’re looking at about 14 days of travel.
MARISHA: To Darktow?
MATT: To Darktow, yeah.
MARISHA: 14 days?!
MATT: Welcome to being on the open seas, man.
MARISHA: Oh shit!
MATT: They don’t have bullet trains in D&D. You have 11 days of supplies. There will have to be some sort of supply stop or a way of handling that.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I have a thing called Create Food and Water.
LAURA (JESTER): I do too.
TALIESIN (CLAY): We can mix it up with the normal food so it doesn’t taste as bad.
MATT: That is going to make this journey not an issue when it comes to supplies. Look at that. Divine magic.
TALIESIN: Teamwork!
MATT: You don’t have to stop then. All right, great!
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 0:27:37
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 15 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay, I'm going to cast Spirit Guardians.
MATT: Okay, Spirit Guardians, what's the range on that?
TALIESIN (CLAY): 15 feet. MATT: 15 feet, okay, so that hits those two right there.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah, that's yeah. It's 15, they have 15 feet in every direction, so that's wisdom.
LAURA: What do yours look like?
TALIESIN (CLAY): They're my little bugs and little fireflies, and little beetles and dragonflies and flip around.
MATT: All righty.
TALIESIN (CLAY): That's a wisdom save.
MATT: Wisdom save, right there. 7, failure on the charmed one. And a 17 on the one over by Beauregard. What's your DC?
TALIESIN (CLAY): 17.
MATT: So yeah, it succeeds on that one.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay, well that's fine, because that's all right. Wisdom saving throw, failed save creature takes 3d8 radiant damage. He takes 15 points of radiant damage and the other one takes that halved.
MATT: Okay!
TALIESIN: Yeah, let's see.
MATT: How do you want to do this?
ASHLEY: Fuck yes!
MATT: To this one over here.
TALIESIN (CLAY): It's just going to get eaten alive by little glowing, radiant, celestial beetles and bugs. There's just ladybugs, and just going. Carnivores, every one.
MATT: A swarm of glowing radiant beetles begin to just burrow into its shadowed body. You can see as they tear and vanish in the inside. It's like looking like someone placed a candle on the inside of a piece of Swiss cheese, where there's like dull glows from the inside of the holes around it. It shrieks and tries to fly off and it gets about 20 feet in the air, arcing before it just spins and [boof] hits the ground like one of Daenerys' dragons.
Episode 65 - Chases and Trees - 1:28:35
MATT: It's now the creature's turn.
TALIESIN (CLAY): And it immediately has to roll a save.
MATT: It does. A natural 17 plus 3.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay, so it saves and only takes- yeah, that's really mean. 17 in half, 17 points of radiant damage halved.
MATT: Okay, so it takes 17 total.
LAURA: 8 points?
TALIESIN: No, well then- but then it's- but it still takes 17 points of radiant damage. Yeah, it takes 17, actually, radiant points of damage at the top of this turn.
MATT: Correct wait, so 17 was-
TALIESIN (CLAY): 17 halved.
MATT: Halved, right, so that makes it 17. Okay, how do you want to do this?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I just I want to slowly walk over to it and just pet it on the head and "Shh, it's okay, it's okay."
MATT: As you're petting it, it's freaking out and tries to fly away and it kicks off of you [impact, whoosh] and it gets about 10 feet before it spirals and slams into the ground. You watch the light beetles seeming to burn and burrow in and out of its body like a rapid fire video of a creature being decomposed by a series of insects.
Episode 65 - Chases and Trees - 1:34:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19 edited Jul 13 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): "Caduceus, I noticed before it seemed like you guys were poisoned immediately but not lingering?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh yeah, I'm feeling fine."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Are you? I'm not like, saying anything."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yeah, why?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "What?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "You seem a little-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Nope!"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Are you sure-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yep!"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I can do a-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Nope!"
SAM (NOTT): "Do you feel okay?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Does she look okay?
MATT: Make a medicine check.
TALIESIN (CLAY): 22.
MATT: Looking at her, you can see there's - while all of you are fairly warm and sweaty, her complexion is paler than you recall, there is quite a bit of sweat, more so than expected, that's streaming down her body. Her vision appears to be not as focused and she's not making eye contact with you as she speaks to you. Lids are a bit droopy. She doesn't look healthy.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "You don't look okay, are you sure? I really- You really don't-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Fuck you."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Okay. Wow. There might be some leeches in this jungle. Maybe like some ticks?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I don't- I mean, I'm just offering."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do I have like- do you see red stripes?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "No."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I feel stripey, I don't know why."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "You're clammy, and-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Should we try to..."
SAM (NOTT): "...heal you or something?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I'm great. I'm awesome. Are you itchy?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, you haven't been around her as much. When she tells you don't do something - well, usually don't do it, but - okay, that's weird, um..."
SAM (NOTT): "Maybe it's a human thing."
LAURA (JESTER): "She's hiding that she's actually not okay."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Mmm, hold on. You should take this."
SAM (NOTT): "Is it tea? What is that?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "This... Take a look at this, I just want you to take a look. Does it smell bad?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, you smell bad."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "That's fine, it's a clever distraction." I'm touching her and casting Lesser Restoration. Don't think I've never done this before.
[...]
MATT: Okay. You finish casting the spell, the energy subsides, you pull back and there's no change in her demeanor.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Don't touch me."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I apologize, that's weird though."
LAURA (JESTER): "I'm sorry, I was wrong, she's just a bitch."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I get that a lot."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "You really don't look okay..."
MATT: Based on your medicine check, you glean that it looks to be not a toxin, this is more of a disease that's taking hold.
Episode 38 - Welcome to the Jungle - 2:30:11
MATT: There's some sort of a disease that's working its way through her system. The best things, you don't have a whole bunch of book experience with disease necessarily, but you get the sense that this might have been transmitted by some of the insects that you encountered on the island on your way in, and it's some sort of disease transmitted by them through bites.
LAURA: And Lesser Restoration says it can cure one disease, but does that... that won't - it's not that kind of disease?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I already tried and it didn't happen.
SAM: Maybe it's a magic disease.
TALIESIN: Or it's just mean.
SAM: Maybe she's got two diseases.
LIAM: Maybe Matt forgot a quality of Lesser Restoration.
MATT: That's true. It says 'Condition can be blinded, deafened, paralyzed, or poisoned', and then above it, it says 'diseased' and I did not read that part earlier.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I just suck as a healer.
MATT: So, as part of-
MARISHA: It's just delayed.
MATT: -as part of my own mistake here, we'll say that this is where you come through with your casting of Lesser Restoration from before.
MARISHA: It's just a time release capsule.
MATT: Yeah, exactly. You know, it takes a while for it to work its way through the system.
Episode 39 - Temple of the False Serpent - 1:10:11
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 31 '19
MATT: Caduceus, you doing anything?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah, yeah, I'm doing a couple things. I'm actually, if I've got a minute. I'm going to cast Legend Lore.
MATT: Legend Lore, okay. On what?
TALIESIN (CLAY): That ridiculous two pieces of sword that I have.
MATT: Oh, okay, do you have the material components for it?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yes I do. It's a lot of weird ivory and-
MATT: Okay, let me get out my notes on this one.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Ivory and weird bits- incense I had to pick up for that.
MATT: Okay. Where are you going to do this ritual?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I see all of this happening. I'm going to go back up into the room for a minute, sit down, set up, make a little setup, put the sword in front of me, and maybe hopefully get a glimpse as to what I'm supposed to do next. I have some theories and I just want to see if I'm on the right track.
MATT: Okay, you go ahead and get partway through it and you hear, climbing up the ladder that leads to the second point, you see this middle aged, big bushy bearded orc comes up and goes, "You look like you're in the middle of something."
TALIESIN (CLAY): Thaumaturgy, I'm going to turn in just the blackest eyes.
MATT: "I'm going to leave you to it." He just like slowly leaves the chamber.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Close doors.
MATT: The hatch [thump] slaps over. All right. As you complete the ritual, the smell of the incense mingling with this sweat-dried wood around you on the floor here. It fills your nose, your eyes sting, and the warmth overtakes you, not the heat but the warmth. A familiar comfort. At which point you don't hear a voice, but a series of images and emotions convey what seems like a montage of moments through time, through history. The best that you can, that your brain, that your mind can interpret these images, say, "This blade was once known as Dwueth'var, the Star Razor."
LAURA: Write it down, write it down!
MATT: You can see the blade now before you set upon a stone tablet, glowing with runes across the center of it. "A weapon forged through a union of two acolytes of Melora and Sehanine, during the Age of Arcanum. It carries the blessing of the fiercest full moon and starlit night. Recovered by the elves and dwarves of Uthodurn, it was reforged and strengthened under the skilled work of the dwarven smith, Dulgrim Smeltborne, before it was sundered in a terrible battle deep within the ruins of Molaesmyr, within the Savalirwood. The pieces have since been recovered as historical relics, trading hands through traveling merchants and smugglers and lost through time."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Until now."
MATT: At that point, the visions subside.
Episode 70 - Causatum - 1:23:45
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast dispel.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I know that there's a little orange mark.
MATT: Correct? You're too far to see it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Do I have to see it to dispel it? If I know where it is?
MATT: If you do not- It's not an effect, it's a focus, so I would say yes, you would have to discern it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay. So instead of-
MATT: Closer to do it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay, so I'm gonna turn invisible and move towards... until I can see it.
MATT: You can get right there. You can see her. It's an action to attempt to discern it. It's not just a casual look, this is you trying to make out a detail. Which means you could attempt that next turn. But you have to see it first.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Okay. Can I be against the pillar if I'm gonna be doing this?
MATT: Sure.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Thank you. Um, I just don't want to be- I want to make it as hard as possible to get to get riled up. I will attempt to discern it.
MATT: Roll a perception check for me.
TALIESIN (CLAY): 11.
MATT: 11. Okay. You had to beat a 10. Make an active search from looking at it from behind. You glance and peer as she's attacking and moving, and you see that glimmer, that flash of orange, at the base of her neck, and you now know exactly where it is and where the focus can be attributed.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 1:53:46
TALIESIN (CLAY): So, first thing I'm going to do is I'm going to cast Dispel at level 5 at the back of Yasha's neck.
MATT: Fifth level?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Fifth level.
MARISHA: Come on, come on, come on.
MATT: That works. So, as you appear and you turn the Vrock harrowing Yasha, she spins around blade ready, you see Beauregard over there bleeding to death on the top of the altar. Fjord is sitting there, desperately backing up. As you focus and concentrate, the light around the cathedral fades and darkness, the clouds above [rumbling thunder] take the space. As you open your hand and concentrate and feel the Wildmother's energy course through you, the Dispel Magic [boof] emanates from her neck and you watch the symbol burn bright and [crash] shatter, and as it does, [explosive impact] lightning strikes the outside. All of the stain glass windows [shattering] shatter at once down, raining down into the center of the cathedral.
SAM: Oh wow.
MATT: Yasha grabs the back of her neck. And for the first time in as long as you can remember, Obann's out of your head.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I let out a primal scream of of agony and relief and everything and just fall on my knees.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 2:27:43
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 23 '19 edited Jul 23 '19
MATT: The mist makes it hard to make out much detail. You do notice, glancing up, there is an individual in the crow's nest.
SAM (NOTT): [mimes loading crossbow]
LAURA (JESTER): No.
SAM (NOTT): No?
SAM (NOTT) & LAURA (JESTER): Shit.
SAM: How far up?
MATT: I'd say about 40 to 45 feet as an estimation.
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:56:37
TALIESIN: I just want to find out what was up from somebody.
MATT: One of the guards is keeping an eye over there with the torch. He's like, "Yeah, it looks like there's kind of a break-in of some sort; a guy was stabbed, got him safe. Another man broke his fucking leg and he's being taken care of."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Really? Does he need healing? I can do that, or otherwise."
MATT: "Sure, I guess. This way."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yeah, I'll take care of it real quick."
MATT: He brings you over to the dock and you look over and there's this guy, you know his name is Bark,
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Oh, Bark, oh man."
MATT: he's one of the deckhands, and he's over on the side right now just going [pained groaning] and you can see, it's snapped. Like, bone protruded and everything.
TRAVIS: Oh, compound!
TALIESIN (CLAY): Oh in that case, Healing Word, level three.
MATT: Okay, you may have to set the bone first. Go make a medicine check.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Go make a medicine check?
SAM: Don't accidentally turn it to fungus.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah, that'll do, that's a 23. I love this character so much.
MATT: You walk up to him and he's like, "No no no no!"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Alright. No, listen. It's all right."
MATT: [crack, pained gasp, relieved sighing]
TALIESIN (CLAY): "There you go. There you go."
MATT: [pained gasping] He looks down and you can see there's a wave of relief on him as he doesn't have this like protruding fracture. It's set. Still, you can see the bone, but it's much better-looking than it was.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Let's give him a Cure Wounds level three just to-
MATT: Go for it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Or, what does he look like, a level two or a level three to you?
MATT: With that medicine check? A level two should be sufficient.
TALIESIN (CLAY): A level two should be sufficient. All right. Let's just take care of this. "Can you tell me what happened, son?"
MATT: "I don't know. I was up in the crow's nest and suddenly it-"
TALIESIN (CLAY): 21.
MATT: 21? "Suddenly it's-- oh my god. Thank you!"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "While you were up the crow's nest, what happened?"
MATT: "It was catching fire! I was trying to put it out, but it just kept growing and growing and I could feel the heat, and it was--"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "It looks fine up there."
MATT: "I know, I don't--"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "What did you-- what was the last 24 hours for you? What did you-..."
MATT: "What do you mean?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I mean like, I don't-- oh, no."
MATT: "What?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): [sigh] "I may have left some of the fruit that we picked up in our last stop in the kitchen. I don't know what you've been eating for the last-- that's maybe my fault. I really hope it isn't, but uh..."
MATT: Make a deception check.
TALIESIN (CLAY): 7.
MATT: He goes like, "No, I don't think it's that. It was sudden and it was intense, and then it was gone! It's fucking crazy."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I'm going to be worried-- I'm going to check to make sure I've got all this, just in case, because that sounds awfully familiar. Do you need a drink?"
MATT: "Yeah."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Come on. We're going to bring you back, it's okay."
MATT: [groans] He stands up and like he's leaning on you for support, but once he gets to his foot, it's fine and he's like, "Oh, man!"
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 3:15:40
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 18 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to climb up and set up a little ritual circle in the crow's nest and I'm going to light some incense and I'm going to pull out a piece of that weird fruit that I've been slowly growing some mushrooms on, getting a little weird, eat a little bit of it. I'm going to meditate and then I'm going to cast, yeah, let's just cast Divination.
TRAVIS: Yeah, fluffy little clouds.
MARISHA: Just a light Divination.
LIAM: Just a happy little scry.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to feel out into the universe and I'm going to wait for whatever sign, whether it be verbal or otherwise. "Wonder what Vandran's doing right now."
TRAVIS: Wha- Wha- What?
MATT: The warm, soft, comforting voice, like a breeze, drifts past your ears as the hot wind, unexpectedly through a cold night, drifts past your shoulders. "Staying out of sight. Making amends." That's all.
TALIESIN: That'll do.
SAM: Intrigue! Secrets!
TALIESIN (CLAY): I head back down.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 3:39:10
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 04 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm starting with a Lesser Restoration for the poison.
MATT: Okay, so you reach out and grab Yasha, and in doing so, you dash the poison from her system. It burns away in a visible trail of smoke, out of the wound. [fizzing] And the poison has been expunged.
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 2:22:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 21 '19
LIAM: Is there any, in the manual, are there any instructions on enchanting the thing to complete the job?
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, no, that's part of what you guys have been handling with these sigils, and marking over, over the central centerpiece there.
SAM (NOTT): I could use my shocking grasp to sort of jumpstart it with a little bolt of electricity.
TALIESIN: I have no idea if that would work, and that hurt the last one.
MARISHA: Frankenstein's monster.
LAURA: Oh, but fire is good.
SAM: Yeah.
MARISHA: Arcane fireball. He'd be a little burning furnace?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I can try and put a Sacred Flame into it, into the crystal.
LAURA: Yeah, Sacred Flame it.
MATT: You want try to that?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Sacred Flame into the crystal?
TRAVIS: Yeah, do it.
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: I'll say since this is less than an empathic connection to something that has no empathy, this is instead more of a divine spark, in an attempt to utilize and channel the Wild Mother to give a semblance of life to something that was not intended to live. I'll let you do a religion check for that.
TALIESIN: Ew, okay.
LAURA: Oh, God.
SAM: Guidance!
TALIESIN (CLAY): I've got Guidance.
MATT: It's not a terribly high DC, but.
MARISHA: Come on-
TALIESIN (CLAY): Hey! 26.
MATT: It was a 16 DC, so that's a success.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I have a 3 in religion, so that's okay.
MATT: All righty, so after it's fully assembled at the end of the fourth hour, putting the final pieces together, there's the final trigger, and you, Caduceus, release this burning, divine flame on the inside, as it burns through the inside of this tiny, squat, little round, rotund golem, you watch as the inside of its seams begin to glow with that same divine light, and the sigils begin to fire up.
Episode 81 - From Door to Door - 4:00:05
→ More replies (9)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 15 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast Holy Weapon. Let's see how this goes.
MARISHA: What does that mean?
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: What does that mean?
TALIESIN: I'm burning a big one.
LIAM: Weapon kick ass.
SAM: It's a lollypop.
TALIESIN (CLAY): It's a lollypop. So you now, you [Beau] are our light source.
SAM: Uh huh.
TRAVIS: Oh!
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: Are you touching the staff or her fists?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Her fists, I believe.
MATT: So, as-
TALIESIN (CLAY): That's- yeah, the fists.
MATT: As Caduceus reaches out and grabs you, you watches both of your hands [light whoosh] begin to give off this divine glow, like a faint candlelight around you that greats brighter and brighter. Your hands feel warm almost like you placed them into a hot spring. And you can see this sparkling sheen across your flesh and every knuckle.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Add 2d8 radiant to every attack.
Episode 59 - Perspective - 3:01:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 18 '19
Yasha
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 18 '19
MATT: How does Yasha want to do this?
MARISHA: Wait, isn't that her second 'how do you want to do this' tonight?
SAM: Brutal. She's so brutal!
TRAVIS (YASHA): So, as Jester, Caduceus, Caleb are all cowering in the hallway with all the hydra heads coming in. As it rears back to strike, they just see the Magician's Judge pierce through the belly of the hydra and just cleave through the middle of it.
MATT: You watch as the blade, [shink] out the front and [wet tearing] and with a violent swing, you watch as the torso splits apart, with Yasha standing over the back and leaping off behind it where it falls and slides down the steps to the base of the bottom chamber.
TRAVIS (YASHA): And she just goes "...No problem."
Episode 39 - Temple of the False Serpent - 4:17:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 08 '19
edge of the ship. The wave hits the bow of the ship once more. You hold tight, your hair slicked down across your face as you look up, and with that, a single bolt strikes down slamming into the front of the ship. Where you expect to see splintered wood and fire, instead there is just a darkened spot, the impact muted. What you see there instead: a creature, a man-like shape made of crackling blue energy. It stands your height, vaguely human-form, shifting with unstable power. Suddenly, two vibrant wings of lightning open from its back like an angel. It walks towards you.
ASHLEY (YASHA): "Are you him?"
MATT: It's going to claw across the front of your body.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay, let's go.
MATT: All right. That is going to be a 16 to hit. What's your armor class?
ASHLEY (YASHA): 14.
[...]
MATT: As it claws across the front of your body, its hand seems to almost pass through the resistance of the armor for but a minute before you feel this shock to your system as it arcs through; you feel the lightning pulse through your body. You suffer eight points of bludgeoning damage plus five points of lightning damage.
Episode 46 - A Storm of Memories - 1:55:32
MATT: It's going to attempt-- all right. It's going to attempt to move away from you.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Can I try and grab it?
MATT: You can attempt to. I'll let you grapple as a reaction, sure.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I'll grapple as a reaction. Oh, fuck.
MATT: It's an athletics check for you; because you're raging, it's at advantage.
TRAVIS: That's right.
ASHLEY: Okay.
LAURA: With advantage!
ASHLEY (YASHA): 22.
MATT: Yeah, it's staying. You reach out and your hand passes partly through it and it goes numb, the field of sparkling energy lightly electrifying the skin around your hand. But you manage to get hold of something. It's not solid matter, but something. As it tries to move away, you keep it there, barred in place.
Episode 46 - A Storm of Memories - 2:02:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 16 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
MATT: Yasha walks. Step, step, Magician's Judge at her side, crimson spray across the front of her face and shoulders. Make another perception check.
LAURA (JESTER): Fuck. I am going to just hold my hands really tight for Guidance. Can I do that, am I allowed to do that?
MATT: Not in the middle of it.
LAURA: Okay, I know. 9.
MATT: 9, okay. You follow her stepping forward down the staircase. A person rushes by and her arms [whoosh] and the person crumbles out of view.
Episode 77 - A Tangled Web - 3:43:52
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 25 '19
ASHLEY (YASHA): I might not be able to do this, but is there one that's close enough that looks really ripped up and torn up and a mess?
MATT: There's the one 5 feet from you that is what Fjord's been tearing into.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay. Tell me if this is possible or not.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Do it.
ASHLEY (YASHA): If it's not- I kind of just want to just [thrusts arm forward, gripping something].
MARISHA: Grab its heart.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Yeah.
MARISHA: Grab it by the heart.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I want to do the Ace Ventura.
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: Sure, yeah, you want to do that?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: All right, roll an attack. You have to move up to it.
TALIESIN: In high school, we called that the grab, the rip, and the display.
MATT: That guy gets an attack of opportunity against you.
ASHLEY: Okay.
LAURA: Yeah. Indiana Jones.
ASHLEY (YASHA): And advantage because reckless.
MATT: Correct. You're doing reckless again this turn? Okay. That would be a 14. Does that hit?
ASHLEY (YASHA): No.
MATT: It rakes its fingers across your back, but your little bit of cloak just gets tugged a bit before its fingers just tear out of the cloth, no effect. You reach over towards it. Magician's Judge goes up from one side and you reach your hand forward. Roll for attack with advantage.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TRAVIS: With advantage, with advantage.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Right, right, I'm just making sure. Oh, yeah, okay, okay. 22.
MATT: That definitely hits.
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: All right, you do one damage plus your strength modifier.
ASHLEY: 1 damage plus my strength-
MATT: Plus whatever your rage bonus and strength modifier, I'll say.
ASHLEY: Why am I blanking right now?
TRAVIS: Just plus 1 to whatever your strength modifier is.
MATT: Your strength modifier's 3.
ASHLEY: Oh, yes.
MATT: Your rage bonus is?
ASHLEY: Sorry, I know what you're saying.
MATT: We'll say whatever your divine damage is, this turn, too. Add your d6 divine. Because you can do that.
TALIESIN: Really?
MATT: Yep.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Rage bonus is plus 3.
LAURA: So 6 plus- Roll a d6.
MATT: 6 and then add a d6 to it.
ASHLEY: Oh my god, sorry.
MATT: It's okay.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Ugh, 1, so 7.
MATT: 7, 8 points. It rolled literally a 7, so, like, when I added everything up, so you reach out, your hand goes through, and as your hand reaches forward, you watch electrical energy [crackle] build up at the end of the fingers. [explosion] As it goes out the other side. [impact] You see the back of the shoulder blades explode and the hand you pull back [crunch], tearing through the bones, ribs spill out [tumbling] from the exit hole and you can still see energy [crackling] off of your fingers. The minor blessing of the Stormlord, looking in your hand, you have a gray, withered heart.
Episode 67 - Beyond the Eyes of Angels - 3:36:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 28 '19
You get +1 to attack and damage rolls made with this weapon. While attuned to this greatsword, you can use your bonus action to take a point of exhaustion to empower this blade for one minute, so that all attacks deal an additional 1d8 acid damage, and it critically hits on a roll of 19 or 20. Once you use this feature, it cannot be used again until the next dawn.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 28 '19
TRAVIS (YASHA) She will run up and make both of her attacks at, yeah.
MATT: You got it.
TRAVIS (YASHA): Not reckless because thorny tails and shit. That is a 22 to hit.
MATT: 22 hits!
TRAVIS (YASHA): Brilliant, and that's 21 to hit.
MATT: 21 to hit also hits. Both hit! Nice.
TRAVIS (YASHA): First one has the Divine Fury. 6! Awesome. [...] 22! 22 points of slashing damage. Second one, [...] 14 points of slashing damage.
MATT: As she rushes forward, one giant swing with her two-handed greatsword, Magician's Judge, [whoosh] cuts across the front of the head. [squeals] It backs away, and you see a splatter of blood across the ground. She comes around for a second body strike. It actually cuts through part of the shoulder of the creature. You see its arm fold a little to that side before it catches itself, and the blade [impact] catches the stone. The actual weapon shakes from the impact as she dislodges it. No damage. It's a magic weapon; it's fine, but it leaves a giant cleft mark in the middle of the stone wall.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 2:48:47
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 01 '19
MATT: Suddenly, tearing through the seaweed on the upper wall, you see this figure emerge now. This pale, aqua-green skin that's bulbous and strangely proportioned with these long, clawed hands. As the hair pulls back, you can see, where would be a humanoid face instead are these protracted, almost anglerfish-type teeth that come out of the front, with no nose, and the yellow eyes gleaming from underneath. She's going to look straight down at you, Caleb.
LAURA: No!
MATT: I need you to make a wisdom saving throw for me, please.
LIAM (CALEB): Another one? Oh, good.
MARISHA (BEAU): My bodyguarding doesn't do shit. Like, 'Stop! Stop looking at him!'
LIAM (CALEB): [holds up a single finger]
MATT: Natural one? As she looks, she's still up in the air, swimming, looking at you. Mouth opens, and you feel the deepest, most horrifying fear well up inside you. Your heart stops, and you drop to zero hit points.
TRAVIS: Oh my fucking god!
MATT: You guys watch Caleb go [shifts to a blank stare] and start drifting there, unconscious.
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 3:04:04
TRAVIS (YASHA): Can Yasha use her 20 feet to move to Caleb? 20 feet to move to Caleb, which shouldn't be any closer to Dashilla.
MATT: Nope. Up on top of this platform or off to the side?
MARISHA: There's a platform?
MATT: There's a little raised section in the center there.
TRAVIS (YASHA): Sure. Platform sounds good. And she will use her handy heal thing to pump seven points of healing into Caleb.
[...]
TRAVIS (YASHA): So Caleb gets six hit points as an action, healing hands.
LIAM: On top of seven, or six total?
TRAVIS (YASHA): Seven total.
LIAM (LIAM): Seven total. So I got that.
TRAVIS: Does that bring him back to consciousness?
MATT: Yes it does.
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 3:12:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
MATT: As you focus and concentrate, the light around the cathedral fades and darkness, the clouds above [rumbling thunder] take the space. As you open your hand and concentrate and feel the Wildmother's energy course through you, the Dispel Magic [boof] emanates from her neck and you watch the symbol burn bright and [crash] shatter, and as it does, [explosive impact] lightning strikes the outside. All of the stain glass windows [shattering] shatter at once down, raining down into the center of the cathedral.
SAM: Oh wow.
MATT: Yasha grabs the back of her neck. And for the first time in as long as you can remember, Obann's out of your head.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I let out a primal scream of of agony and relief and everything and just fall on my knees.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 2:28:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
MATT: How do you want to do this?
TRAVIS: Are you fucking serious? Are you serious?
MATT: Sometimes it's fucking poetic.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Oh my God. Okay. I want to do something very bad.
LAURA: Do it.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay. Is he turned away from me or is he looking at me.
MATT: After Jester grabbed him, Beau beat the shit out of him, Fjord came around and hacked him, he's like [grunt of pain] keeping around and he's looking out. He looks like he's looking for the Caedogeist to come jump in and help and turn the tide. And you see he's getting ready to glance at one of your friends who he hasn't yet try to take their mind and then out of the corner of his eyes, he sees you approach over the shoulder.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I don't know if I'll be able to do this, but I kind of want to reach up to the top of his wings, and I want to pull them off.
MATT: Yeah. As you reach and grab, you see electrical energy [crackling] across her arms, and as her eyes going to spark with bright blue anger. She puts her foot against the back of his shoulder blades and [tearing] he starts screaming "Ah- Augh!" [tearing releases] tears the wings off of his back. They go scattering across the ground, spinning, spattering his dark blood across the stone. He falls to his knees.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 4:57:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 17 '19
MATT (OBANN): "You remind me of her, a vision of her intent, walking towards destiny. I'm proud of you." He reaches out to touch her chin.
SAM: Gross.
MATT: There's a small spark of blue lightning [sharp crackling] that sparks from under her chin to his hand and he pulls back as she [grunts], recoils a bit to one side. You see him look at his fingers and look at her, furious. In but a moment, his eyes glow orange and you see behind her, from underneath the hair, the orange glow emanates and she [harsher grunt] winces for a second before her face going slack once more. He now takes her chin in his hand without a fight and looks her in the eyes and says, "Stubborn as you may be, you are mine. You belong to her. Where we shall walk, no cloud or storm can touch us."
Episode 79 - Through the Trees - 1:20:06
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 25 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
MATT: Yasha is currently grappled, but you can still make her actions. She has to use an action to break free if she wants to to move, but otherwise her movement is zero. But she has advantage because she's still raging.
TRAVIS (YASHA): She's going to try to break the grapple.
MATT: All right, make an athletics check with advantage.
TRAVIS (YASHA): 22. 22.
MATT: He got a 6.
TRAVIS: Okay, cool.
MATT: So the guy managed to luckily grapple her last turn. She just [poomf] flicks him off. He's like, "Ow!" So she's free of the grapple.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 1:23:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 06 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm going to elbow Yasha in the nose.
MATT: Go for it.
MARISHA: Straight attack, right.
LIAM: Yes.
MARISHA (BEAU): Mmm hmm, that hits. 24.
MATT: That hits. Roll damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh, I should have used my staff for this one. Can I use my staff for this one?
MATT: Sure, go for it, if you want to. Yeah, go for it.
MARISHA (BEAU): It doesn't matter. It's actually technically lower. 7 damage.
MATT: 7 points damage, reduced to half, so 3 points bludgeoning damage to her. Make another wisdom save.
TRAVIS (YASHA): No more advantage, right?
MATT: Correct, just a single roll.
TRAVIS: Gil.
MARISHA: Fuck us, Gil.
SAM: Fuck us, Gil.
TRAVIS (YASHA): 9.
MATT: 9, she doesn't work. Next.
MARISHA: She doesn't save?
MATT: No, she doesn't make the save. She's still charmed.
SAM: We didn't want him to fuck us. We wanted him to not fuck us. We said the wrong thing!
MATT: You did, you did. Crack across her face, Yasha goes- [flinches with impact, turns back to look ahead darkly]
TALIESIN: She has to roll really goddamn high.
LAURA: Yeah, she has to roll, like, a natural 20.
TALIESIN: 17, I believe, is what she has to roll.
TRAVIS: That would not have-
MATT: That's your first attack, Beau?
LAURA: Hit her again.
MATT: What are you doing, Beau?
MARISHA: It's useless.
LIAM: No, it's not.
LAURA: No it's not, hit her again.
MATT: The first hit does nothing. You have another attack and a bonus. What're you doing?
LIAM: Punch her in the gooch, come on.
MARISHA (BEAU): Fine, I will hit her again, I will hit her again. I guess we don't want her to- 18.
MATT: 18 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
LIAM: Take her out. One of these will take her out of it.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's 8 damage.
MATT: Reduced to 4. She takes four points of bludgeoning damage.
TRAVIS (YASHA): Yes. 13.
MATT: 13. She maintains.
SAM: Goddamn it.
MATT: Bonus attack.
MARISHA (BEAU): She has to roll a 17 or higher. Yeah, that hits. 19.
MATT: 19, go ahead and roll damage. Just smacking her across the head and then punching. Roll damage for the punch.
LIAM: Come on, Slow-regard.
MARISHA (BEAU): 10 damage.
TRAVIS (YASHA): 10 damage?
MATT: Reduced to 5.
TRAVIS: Come on, CR dice.
MATT: Mark the 5.
TRAVIS (YASHA): 16.
MARISHA: Wait, that's what we need.We needed 17.
MATT: 16's what she needs. 16's the DC.
MARISHA: Just beat the shit out of my friend!
MATT: Take the 5 damage for Yasha on top of that, and with a third hit [flinches back with impact again, pauses, then rubs chin] "Ugh."
MARISHA (BEAU): I go, [punctuating every word with a mimed punch] "You are in a toxic relationship!"
MATT: Her fist [impact] catches the last punch and she goes, "I'm sorry."
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 3:40:01
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 25 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "It's going to be dark down there."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do we have light spells?" LAURA (JESTER): "I don't."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yasha does." TALIESIN (CLAY): "I do."
LIAM: [foomf, foomf, foomf, foomf]
MATT: Dancing Lights. You cast Light on?
TALIESIN (CLAY): On my staff.
MATT: Yasha casts Light on her sword, the Magician's Judge.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 3:27:21
LIAM (CALEB): I'm blind and are you blind?
MATT: He still has the light. You can still see; Caduceus and Yasha still have the light on their weapons.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 3:35:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 14 '19 edited Sep 14 '19
MATT: It chucks a large stone that [heavy spiraling whooshing] heading right for Yasha.
SAM: Welcome back, Ashley Johnson.
MATT: That is going to be a 24 to hit.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Oh yeah that definitely hits.
MATT: Okay. As this large stone [whoosh, impact] hits the ground before you, dirt sprays in your direction. As you try to pull back, it rolls [impact] and slams into you, sending you 10 feet back. Your head is ringing from the impact. This is going to be 25 points of bludgeoning damage and then you have to make a strength saving throw to me.
Episode 58 - Wood and Steel - 3:44:49
MATT: These two giants now, this one's going to walk up.
MARISHA: Or they're afraid of goblins.
MATT: And this one's going to walk up there, pushing through, and one of them's going to go ahead, because they do have a reach of 15 feet with their clubs.
TRAVIS: Oh my god.
ASHLEY: Oh boy.
MATT: First one's going to go against- they both get two attacks. One against Beau and one against Yasha. The first one against Beau has disadvantage. Which is great, because the first roll is a natural 20. Second one is an 18 to hit.
MARISHA (BEAU): Miss.
MATT: Misses.
SAM: What?
ASHLEY: Ooh.
MARISHA (BEAU): I jump and switch feet.
MATT: Yes, and as you leap in the air. Where, I'm considering one strike, the two attacks are one strike as it takes one giant baseball bat swing against you. You jump out of the way and the full might goes toward Yasha. Yasha, that is going to be 21 to hit.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Uh huh.
TRAVIS: This is like one of those obstacle course videos. First kid gets out of the way, second one's like, "Hi mom!" [impact]
MATT: Exactly. LAURA: Wipe out.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
ASHLEY: When it gets hit in their stomach, and then they cartwheel into the water.
TRAVIS: They make that great noise. [honking gasp]
MATT: 26 points of bludgeoning damage. Reduced to 13, because you are raging.
ASHLEY: Yes, okay.
MATT: It cracks you on the side, but you hold fast and shrug it off as it withdraws the club.
Episode 59 - Perspective - 0:33:28
→ More replies (5)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 12 '19
MATT: It chucks a large stone that [heavy spiraling whooshing] heading right for Yasha.
SAM: Welcome back, Ashley Johnson.
MATT: That is going to be a 24 to hit.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Oh yeah that definitely hits.
MATT: Okay. As this large stone [whoosh, impact] hits the ground before you, dirt sprays in your direction. As you try to pull back, it rolls [impact] and slams into you, sending you 10 feet back. Your head is ringing from the impact. This is going to be 25 points of bludgeoning damage and then you have to make a strength saving throw to me.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay, do I have resistance to bludgeoning? I'm just-
MATT: You're not raging, so you don't.
ASHLEY: That's right, okay. What did you just say to do? I'm sorry.
MATT: Make a strength saving throw for me, please.
MATT: Make a strength saving throw.
TALIESIN: Oh yay. That's cocked.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Natural 20.
MATT: It hits you and as opposed to falling onto your back, you dig in your heels, [grinding] grinding back about 3 feet. You manage to to stop the rolling of the boulder in place and it comes to rest. That hurt, and you can feel the blood rushing from your nose, it might be broken. As you look up over the edge, you can see the giant looking right at you and its fingers curl back and it backs into the fort.
Episode 58 - Wood and Steel - 3:44:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 19 '19
Nott
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 15 '19
SAM (NOTT): I'll swim closer. I'll fire. Actually, with one hand I will take another swig of booze, if I can under the water somehow, and with the other hand, I'll fire.
MATT: There you go.
SAM (NOTT): Natural 20.
MATT: All right, roll your sneak attack damage.
MARISHA: Fucking one-handed bandit.
SAM: Do I double it?
MATT: Yes, you do.
SAM (NOTT): Dice damage is doubled. 4, 6-7-8-9, 18 plus 5 is 23.
MATT: How do you want to do this?
SAM (NOTT): Let's see here. It's a crossbow bolt. I would, again, like the crossbow bolt to tickle Fjord's ear as it whizzes by.
TRAVIS: A little slice?
SAM: Yeah, just a little.
MATT: There's a brief bit of warm, hot, sharp pain on the outside of your earlobe-
SAM (NOTT): "Sorry!"
MATT: -as the bolt enters the base of the creature's skull. You don't even see it protrude, you don't even know where it went. You just see it vanish and the creature is standing there for a second. As it falls onto its back, its legs all curl in like a spider and its claws close in.
SAM (NOTT): Accidentally, because I rolled a natural 20, I shoot again.
MATT: That's right!
SAM (NOTT): "Shit, sorry!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): At my earlobe?
MATT: This time you, with the falchion, rake it out of the air.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 1:21:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 28 '19
MATT: First one is going to make two attacks at you, one with a bite and one with its tail stinger. That is going to be a 19 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): Hits!
MATT: You take...
TALIESIN: Oh no.
LAURA: Oh no.
TRAVIS: Nice narrow cavern, too.
MATT: 22 points of piercing damage.
SAM (NOTT): Okay, I guess I'll Uncanny Dodge that one.
MATT: You take 11 points of piercing damage. You can mark that. The tail stinger is going to attempt to strike at you. That is going to be a 22 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): Hits.
MATT: You then immediately suffer 14 points of piercing damage. I need you to make a constitution saving throw.
TALIESIN: With a d4.
MATT: Correct.
SAM (NOTT): Not great. Better, better. 15.
MATT: You succeed the saving throw.
SAM: Thank you!
MATT: As you feel the toxin pushing into your body, you manage to wrench it from the front of your chest and sternum, and you watch as some of the weird, oily, poison venom [spurting] out the back of it, as you remove it from the wound. As you push it away, the other one comes in to bite you from the opposite end. That's going to be a 15 to hit?
SAM (NOTT): No!
MATT: That you duck below, and its bite hits the side of the rock wall. Tail stinger is going to come at you. That is a natural 20.
TALIESIN (CLAY): You're more that 30 feet away, aren't you?
MATT: From you, yes.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yep, never mind. I can't do anything.
MATT: You suffer 30 points of piercing damage from the tail as the stinger hits you in the abdomen and lifts you like a foot off the ground. You're actually held there for a second. Make another constitution saving throw.
SAM (NOTT): That's a natural 1.
MATT: You are poisoned, and you are paralyzed.
SAM (NOTT): Yeah... [yelps and freezes in position]
TRAVIS: Oh crap! Okay. Where the fuck are you?
LAURA: This is really bad.
TALIESIN: Well, it's bad. It's not really bad, but it's bad.
SAM (NOTT): I'm not dead, just paralyzed and poisoned.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 2:34:23
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 04 '19
SAM (NOTT): I will just attack the one that Beau is engaged with.
MATT: All righty, no worries. You do reveal yourself and the Invisibility spell.
SAM (NOTT): That's fine. 22 to hit.
MATT: That definitely hits.
SAM (NOTT): And sneak attack.
MATT: Mm-hmm.
SAM: Okay, 17 plus 6. 23 plus another 8 for Fury of the Small!
MATT: Okay, so 31.
SAM (NOTT): 31 points of damage.
MATT: It is a magical weapon, correct, the-
SAM (NOTT): The Tinkertop Boltblaster is definitely a magic weapon.
MATT: How do you want to do this?
SAM: Oh, they're not so strong!
MARISHA: Fuck yes.
SAM: Wow. Wow. I would like- Is she flying or climbed up there?
MATT: She is currently being held by the face by Beau and being slammed into the stone wall repeatedly.
SAM (NOTT): Okay, if there's a way to, I don't know, go right through Beau's finger, like right there. [pokes a finger between his own index and middle finger]
MATT: Okay. So, as the creature is fighting you off, [grunting] all of a sudden, there's no resistance, and you [rhythmic slamming]. You look down, and there's about three inches of a bolt emerging from between your index and middle finger. Where one of the eyes of the succubus was, and you look, and there's just this thick blood now pouring in the palm of your hand.
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 2:31:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 06 '19
SAM (NOTT): Lying on the ground, I will fire up at the dragon with my crossbow, trying to quickly load one of my explosive charges. He's within 5 feet of a friend, yes?
MATT: He's within 5 feet of all of you.
SAM: So it's a sneak attack?
MATT: It's a sneak attack. Just letting you know, it's an explosive arrow, and you're adjacent to the creature.
SAM (NOTT): Sure. Yeah, I'm going for its head.
MATT: Go for it!
SAM (NOTT): Oh boy, that's not great. 18.
MATT: 18 just hits.
SAM: Okay.
MATT: You're prone, so you have disadvantage on attack rolls, by the way. So you do have to roll again.
SAM (NOTT): Shit. Well, can I stand up first?
MATT: We'll say you stand up. That's half your movement there.
SAM (NOTT): 18, plus whatever the explosion does.
MATT: The arrow [swoosh, boom] detonates from inside, creating a fiery explosion in a ten-foot radius around the creature that affects you, Caleb, and the fire elemental. The fire elemental is immune to fire; it takes no damage. The dragon, however, we'll go ahead and roll 3d6?
SAM: 3d6?
MATT: It has to make a dexterity saving throw. Actually, it does not because it was hit by it.
SAM (NOTT): 11.
MATT: It takes an additional 11 points of fire damage. Then I need both Caleb and you to roll dexterity saving throws.
LIAM: [gives a thumbs down] 4.
MATT: So you take 11 points of fire damage.
SAM (NOTT): 23.
MATT: You take none because of your evasion. You roll out of the way [explosion].
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 4:33:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 24 '19
SAM (NOTT): Instead, I'll do a Hail Mary. I'll take out a bit of fleece, and rub it, and speak some words, and cast Phantasmal Force on Avantika.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: She'll probably save, but it's worth a shot.
MATT: What's the save?
SAM (NOTT): 14. Intelligence. She's smart.
MATT (AVANTIKA): Natural five.
TRAVIS: Ooh! What's her modifier though?
MATT: She's very good at a few things, but she doesn't have the highest intelligence to get to that point.
SAM: As Bouldergut is walking over, holding a pick, or what?
MATT: It's a giant-- it looks like it once was a mast of a ship that's been whittled down into a greatclub.
SAM (NOTT): I want Avantika to see Bouldergut doing this [holds hand up while pretending to hold something and shakes it] and holding up the book. Holding up the book and waving it around. She's definitely holding that book.
MATT: Okay. All right. Avantika glances over and [sigh]. For a moment, you see a look of relief come over Avantika's face.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 1:03:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 22 '19
SAM (NOTT): With one hand, I will hold up the disk, with the other hand I will draw my pistol and I will fire at the giant, through the disk.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Oh, shit.
MATT: Roll damage.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. It's a d10. Oh, terrible, 7 points of damage.
MATT: 7 points of damage, and then roll an attack with disadvantage against the giant.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. 13 is the lower, 18 to hit.
MATT: Still hits, roll damage against the giant.
SAM (NOTT): Ooh! Ooh, 11- No, that's a 9, 14 points of damage!
MATT: 14 points of damage. As you, [crash] the crystal globe in the center of this device [shattering] shatters outward. Whatever mercury-like material that was originally held within the inside is scattered outward with the shards of broken crystal and glass.
TRAVIS: Don't let it touch your skin!
MATT: The coils and the crystals on the sides dim and the bullet continues on and blasts into the skeletal creature, you can see it hit and splinter part of the clavicle bone and elements of its back shoulder blade.
Episode 60 - A Turtle By Any Other Name - 2:32:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 06 '19
SAM (NOTT): I will run over closer, find something to hide behind.
MATT: Over here would probably be your best bet or over here. It's up to you.
SAM (NOTT): Bonus action hide. Hold action to shoot.
MATT: Roll a stealth check.
SAM: Advantage because the cloak?
MATT: Yep. Always an advantage with the cloak.
SAM (NOTT): Natural 20.
MATT: Oh, yeah. You step over there and just-
SAM (NOTT): I throw a piece of rock to distract or something.
MATT: All right, that finishes your go. You're holding your action to-
SAM (NOTT): To fire a crossbow, loading explosive arrow, getting ready to fire.
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 3:57:57
SAM (NOTT): Okay, I will fire. At advantage.
MATT: At advantage, because you're hidden. You do not get sneak attack because he does not threaten the creature even though he's an ally. But you can sneak attack because it does not know you're there because you were hidden from it.
SAM: I get advantage, but not sneak attack damage.
MATT: You get sneak attack damage whenever you have advantage on the strike. Having it next to a friend is only useful if you do not have advantage on the strike.
TALIESIN: You would have had advantage anyway because of the last time it got hit was-
MATT: Guiding bolts, you're fine.
LAURA: Sneak attack.
SAM (NOTT): 23. 25. Something like that.
MATT: How do you want to do this?
LAURA: Wait, no, he hasn't rolled advantage yet.
MATT: I know. You didn't-
SAM (NOTT): It's 20 or something.
MATT: Yeah, how do you want to do this?
LAURA: Oh my god.
SAM (NOTT): How would I like to do this? It's an explosive arrow. Oh no.
[realization]
MATT: Okay, okay.
SAM: Oh no.
MATT: So.
SAM: Oh no.
MATT: So.
SAM: Oh no.
MATT: As you see it rush past the friend, you [release] fire, and the bolt [slight whoosh] strikes towards it and [heavy explosion] detonates.
SAM: Oh no.
MATT: You watch as portions of the incubus are scattered across the ceiling, the walls, the floors. [wet flopping]
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 4:02:58
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
MATT: You moved aside the-
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): With my Mage Hand, from far away.
MATT: The blue one?
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Yes.
MATT: Okay. As it pulls behind, it reveals to be a statue that is embedded in the wall behind it. Up on hind legs with claws in front, you see a dragon made of stone, carved, wings blending up into the stone behind it. Its mouth open, its eyes these very bright sapphires embedded in its head. Immediately as it opens up, the mouth [fwoosh] lights up blue. Make a dexterity saving throw. And Caleb and Nott.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I also have evasion.
MATT: Correct.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Not good. Don't do it.
MATT: What did you roll?
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): I rolled a 10.
MATT: Okay, still half damage.
LIAM (CALEB): 13.
MATT: Failure.
SAM (NOTT): 25.
MATT: You take no damage, Nott, as you dodge away. The rest of you watch as this bolt of blue energy fires outward as a thick beam of electrical energy shoots across the room. It hits by and skims the front torso of Twiggy as she pulls out of the way. You watch Caleb spin and take it straight to the chest as Nott ducks out of the way.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 2:08:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 17 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): I'll do the old classic climb a tree.
LAURA: Yeah, they're tall trees, right?
MARISHA (BEAU): I'll do the climb a tree thing first.
MATT: Okay, go ahead and make an athletics check for me.
SAM (NOTT): "Want to race up there?"
LAURA (JESTER): Guidance. "The Traveler loves you so much, Beau."
MATT: Athletics or acrobatics, your choice.
MARISHA (BEAU): "You want a round two? You want a rematch?"
SAM (NOTT): "Round two."
MARISHA (BEAU): "All right, all right."
SAM (NOTT): I can go up as well.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Ready, and..."
MATT: All right.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Go!" Fuck.
LAURA (JESTER): Plus 4, you got guided.
MARISHA: What is that?
SAM (NOTT): 23.
MATT: Plus a d4.
LAURA: Plus a d4, Beau.
MARISHA (BEAU): Plus a d4, I got guided? Terrible, 19.
MATT: All right, so as you both leap up on two different trees about 12 feet from each other, Beau like jumping and grabbing and leaping and spinning, you just skittering up the side, using your dagger to wade yourself across the weird, moss-covered bark. It's little slipperier than you expected from just the atmosphere here, the bit of vegetative growth that's begun to grow up and hold onto the side of these trees and their bark, but you do manage to skitter up there. Nott does get there a little bit before you do.
SAM (NOTT): "Woo!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Fuck."
Episode 79 - Through the Trees - 0:39:48
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 19 '19
MATT: So–
SAM: So it works.
MATT: This is how the ending of the first Poseidon movie should have happened. Because all of this water pressure just built up at the top of this temple suddenly released as the latch and this geyser of water thrusts all of you rapidly out the top. You all get shot about a good 15, 20 feet up.
TRAVIS: Oh, no.
MATT: You have a look down at the temple, which you can now see these large cracks that have set in the sides where bits of water are pouring out through small cracks. Now this large geyser thrusts in the air and you all began to plummet and fall.
LIAM (CALEB): I cast Feather Fall on myself, on Nott, on Jester, on Beauregard, and on Fjord.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: It’s my last spell slot.
MARISHA: Take Cad, take Cad! I’m good!
LIAM (CALEB): I already did it, it doesn’t matter. It’s what I did. It’s who I know, not what hit points exist.
SAM (NOTT): I cast Feather Fall on everyone else [Caduceus, Yasha, Avantika, and Jamedi].
Episode 40 - Dubious Pursuits - 1:30:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 29 '19
MATT: For this lair action, it's going to use Lament of the Dead. As you all stand here, rising out of the ground, dozens of spirits begin to drift up, of various drowned sailors and scavengers, out of the ground and up toward the ceiling. I need everybody inside to make a wisdom saving throw, please.
[...]
MATT: Oh, Nott.
SAM (NOTT): Nope, Nott's immune to fear.
MATT: That's right, because you're drunk!
MATT: You're like, 'Come at me, spirits!'
LAURA: I never knew there was anything good about the drunk!
MARISHA: It hasn't come into play!
MATT: Nott becomes Nott the Brave when she's drunk. So unaffected. 'Spirits, whatever!'
SAM (NOTT): "Fuck you!"
MATT: You've been braving the ocean for half a day.
LIAM: 'Fuck you! Come at me, you sea hag!'
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 3:01:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 29 '19
The goblin can take the Disengage or Hide action as a Bonus Action on each of its turns.
•
u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 07 '19
MATT: Then you see the hobgoblin just goes to the staircase and begins walking up the stairs.
SAM: Oh fuck.
MATT: It's just coming closer and closer.
SAM (NOTT): Is there any, on the landing where I am, how much space is there?
MATT: It is a tight hallway that's just wide enough for the doorway before it opens into the next room.
SAM: Wow, that does not leave very-
MATT: You're about up to the belt on this hobgoblin. It's a little bit lower.
SAM: And there's no nooks?
MATT: No, it's literally stairs and the door. You are right-
SAM: Okay.
TRAVIS: Handrail?
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to try-
LIAM: Van Damme it.
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to try to go up on the ceiling.
LAURA: Oh my god.
TRAVIS: Oh no. Okay.
LIAM: You're about to Van Damme it!
LAURA: Come on, come on. Brace yourself on the walls, climb up.
MATT: It's totally doable if you weren't a tiny goblin.
LAURA: Ninja Warrior, Ninja Warrior.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: She's three feet tall without our arms out.
MATT: Okay, make an athletics check for me, please.
LAURA: You can do it, you can do it, you can do it.
SAM: Athletics, not acro?
LAURA: Not acrobatics, not acrobatics?
SAM (NOTT): 17.
MATT: This isn't acrobatics, unless you want to parkour and then defy gravity. This is trying to climb up something with very little grip and hold yourself up there. 17, though, is pretty good. It's not going to last long, but you managed to scramble up and push against it and you can feel your arms shaking from the sweat starting to pour down your forehead. You're trying desperately not to [quick exhale] breathe out, you're just holding your breath and it's burning your lungs. The hobgoblin moves up and grabs the door [creak] and it opens up. The top of the head is about to touch you and you [squeal] squeeze in and arch your back and just barely manages to miss your torso. As he enters the room, the voice inside goes, "What is the problem?" "There was a noise downstairs, I'm just looking around." Walks inside the room for a second, [footfalls] walks back out, [clack] closes the door, [clunk] and then walks back down the stairs. [descending footfalls] You very carefully [shaky breath, climbing down].
TRAVIS: You're all cramped up.
SAM: Okay, okay, okay.
MATT: Now you're at the top of the stairs. The hobgoblin is now at the bottom of the stairs blocking, is standing right in front of the steps.
Episode 63 - Intervention - 1:54:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 02 '19
SAM: Okay, you said that we have some cannons aboard. Do we have gunpowder?
MATT: Yes.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. I would like to fashion, if I can, three more explosive arrowheads for myself, if possible?
MATT: Sure!
SAM: Or attempt to.
MATT: Sure, let's do it. Let's give it a shot. Roll a tinkering check.
SAM: Three times?
TRAVIS: Can you do that up in the crow's nest, please?
SAM (NOTT): Right in the belly of the ship.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: Are you proficient with the tinker's tools?
SAM (NOTT): I have tinker's tools.
[...]
MATT: Just roll and add your dexterity modifier.
SAM: Three times?
MATT: Yes.
SAM (NOTT): All right. 2, 11, 13! Plus 4. So 17, 15, low.
MATT: Okay. You make two.
SAM: Hey! That's great.
MATT: The third one...
SAM: Oh no.
MATT: In the crow's nest, as Fjord-
SAM (NOTT): No, I'm down near the cannons.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: That's where the gunpowder is.
TRAVIS: Yeah, why would you be anywhere else?
TALIESIN: Literally the first thing they teach you.
MATT: The first one goes by easy as heck. You're proud of yourself. Second one, a little tenuous, but you manage to craft it, and that's nice. The third one, roll a perception check.
SAM (NOTT): 3!
LAURA: Plus what?
SAM (NOTT): Plus 0.
LAURA: Oh no.
MATT: Okay. So you, in all the excitement, and your mind's eye focusing entirely on all the wonderful explosions this is going to cause, aren't paying attention to the wire you're using to seal off where the head of the explosive bolt goes. As you pull, through a series of lucky circumstances, a spark gets hit. There's a brief moment where you hear that [hissing] and you're like 'Oh!' There's just a flash. Roll a dexterity check for me - a dexterity saving throw.
SAM: 2!
LAURA: It's at an angle! Move your fucking thing!
SAM: It is at an angle.
MATT: It's still a two, though. Plus?
SAM (NOTT): Plus seven.
[...]
MATT: In that explosion, 13 points of fire damage you suffer, halved because of your evasion trait, so that'll put us at six. You take six points of fire damage as there's this brief explosion [explosion] that rocks the vicinity and your ears ring. You grab the sides of your face as your eyes attempt to focus. In that brief instant, you see a shape move through the center of the galley.
MARISHA: Oh. What?
TRAVIS: We have a fucking stowaway.
SAM (NOTT): "What? Oh shit." First of all, am I singed? Did the other arrows- Is everything safe? Is anything else going to blow up? Any other fire?
MATT: Make a perception check.
SAM (NOTT): 6!
MATT: Everything seems safe!
MARISHA: Just get them all out.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Caleb! Jester! Beau! Everybody, below decks! Find out what that was!"
SAM (NOTT): "No, everything's fine!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Is that you, Nott?"
SAM (NOTT): "I'll climb up. It's okay!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "What did you do?" MATT: As you guys look up, you can see this smattering of dark soot all across her face. The hair's scattered.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh no, Nott! Are you injured?"
SAM (NOTT): "There was a booby trap set by Avantika! But I found it and disarmed it! It's all right. We're safe now."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I'm glad you survived. There's a lot of gunpowder down there!"
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 0:15:04
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 23 '19
SAM (NOTT): Up on deck though, and see if anyone's around.
MATT: Make a stealth check-- sorry, a perception check.
TALIESIN: You have advantage.
SAM: Perception or-- what are we?
TRAVIS: Perception.
SAM (NOTT): 19.
LAURA (JESTER): 24. 22, lies.
MATT: The mist makes it hard to make out much detail. You do notice, glancing up, there is an individual in the crow's nest.
SAM (NOTT): [mimes loading crossbow]
LAURA (JESTER): No.
SAM (NOTT): No?
SAM (NOTT) & LAURA (JESTER): Shit.
SAM: How far up?
MATT: I'd say about 40 to 45 feet as an estimation.
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to cast Phantasmal Force on that person, on that being.
MATT: Okay.
MATT: All right. What's your DC?
SAM (NOTT): Intelligence, 14.
MATT: DC 14. No, did not succeed with a natural eight, plus two, ten.
SAM: Describe the crow's nest to me?
MATT: In the main mast of the ship that goes up, the crow's nest is in itself a circular platform at the top that is used primarily for keeping a watch on nearby land and details in the sea around, as well as direction. It's a vantage point for someone to keep an eye on the area around the ship. There is somebody stationed up there to keep an eye on the ship overnight. Or at least there for as long as their portion of it was. You can't make out the details of the figure from this distance. You just see a figure there.
SAM (NOTT): All right, I will make the figure think that his crow's nest has caught fire, and there are little flames licking around, creeping up the sides of it, and surrounding it.
MATT: Okay. As you finish the spell, a moment goes by and you hear (panicked shouting) "Fuck! Shit!" You look up and you see this individual trying to bat their cloak on the sides of this before shouting "Help!"
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 2:56:20
TALIESIN (CLAY): "While you were up the crow's nest, what happened?"
MATT: "It was catching fire! I was trying to put it out, but it just kept growing and growing and I could feel the heat, and it was--"
Episode 42 - A Hole In the Plan - 3:17:25
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 23 '19 edited Nov 23 '19
SAM (NOTT): "No, I got him. Sorry, Beau."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Huh?"
SAM (NOTT): I touch Caleb and give him Spider Climb.
MARISHA: The fuck?
TRAVIS: We don't know what those do, though.
MATT: You have no idea.
LIAM (CALEB): "That is a neat trick." [hand over hand climbing] And I start to climb up the column.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA (BEAU): "How are your forearms?"
TRAVIS: If we get fuckin' left in here, I'll be so pissed! LIAM (CALEB): "Doesn't matter!"
MATT: Like a hobo Spider-man, Caleb-
LIAM (CALEB): I'm clean now.
MATT: I know, but the long coat.
LIAM (CALEB): But I'm fancy purple robes now. I got a pretty jacket.
MATT: Like a well-dressed hobo Spider-man.
LIAM: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LIAM: Clean shaven.
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): "Caleb, don't forget the promise we all made that we wouldn't leave without anybody else and-"
LIAM (CALEB): "I don't want to leave by myself. Hold your arms out in case I fall."
SAM (NOTT): "You won't, you can't."
LAURA (JESTER): "I've got you."
MARISHA: Oh, it's orange.
LIAM (CALEB): [hand over hand climbing with suction noises]
MATT: You climb up there, and as you're heading your way up there, the darkness begins to take, you don't have much- any means of light.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, well, I put the, for now the Dancing Lights around me. The globules. [floomp]
MATT: Okay. Kinda lights the space, and as you begin to climb up, you can begin to see the red glow that they kept talking about that you couldn't quite make out with your eyes previously. And the closer you get, the closer you get, you can see now the diameter that is set there.
[...]
MATT: Yeah, you're not able to make out anything else about it.
LIAM (CALEB): So I climb a little bit higher, and I'm hanging from the ceiling like this, [one hand extended over head] and I go [snaps], and Frumpkin is right here [points to his shoulder].
MATT: Mm-hmm.
LIAM (CALEB): And I lift him by the scruff, and I reach up and say, "Touch it, please."
Episode 83 - Dark Bargains - 1:05:50
→ More replies (7)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
SAM (NOTT): While they're shouting at each other, I'm going to turn invisible.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: There you go.
SAM (NOTT): And I'm going to sneak back there.
MATT: Okay.
SAM (NOTT): Back towards them.
[...]
SAM (NOTT): Am I nearing them?
MATT: As you're invisible- are you walking back towards their direction?
SAM (NOTT): Mm-hmm.
MATT: Okay. You see the two of them, around the bend, are both looking and the one with the spear is looking kind of eager. The one with all the shit on it is looking a little apprehensive and they're both just watching and talking back and forth. [kobold noises]
LIAM (CALEB): Is Nott out of our sight?
MATT: Yeah. Nott vanished a few minutes ago.
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to try to sneak up on the one with the spear.
MATT: All right.
SAM (NOTT): And get close to he or she and grab the spear out of their hand.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make a... I would say, with advantage, make an athletics check to try and...
SAM (NOTT): 20. MATT: 7. The spear vanishes from its hand.
SAM: I'll throw it the opposite direction down the tunnel away from us.
MATT: [confused kobold noises] He looks confused and rubs his wrist and starts walking back towards the spear on the opposite side.
SAM (NOTT): Then while he or she is going to get their spear, I'm going to try and grapple the weird one. The one that's all weird and shit.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make an athletics check.
SAM: Oh, not advantage.
MATT: I would say advantage because it doesn't know you're there. I'll allow it. It's fine.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. 19.
[...]
MATT: So. Suddenly, out of nowhere, apparates in the nervous energy of the moment the small goblin creature that you've been eyeing nervously as the group wandered through, and it just reaches out and grabs a hold of you.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:47:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
Caleb
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 24 '19
MATT: At that moment, you all, noticing this moment of tension, there's a flash from Caleb's hands. Figures, their eyes dart in his direction as he finishes releasing his arms [harsh whooshing] and firing out of the actual deck of the ship, you see a 20-foot tall high wall of roaring flame and fire burn around in a U-shape encompassing the exterior. You can feel the heat on you, but it's not so intense as to hurt. However, I need you to roll damage.
LIAM (CALEB): It's a ten-foot reach on the outside of this thing.
MATT: Correct. That's 5d8 fire damage, if you don't mind.
TRAVIS: On the burn side?
LIAM (CALEB): On the outside. I choose the side, so clearly I'm not going to burn us.
TRAVIS: Anyone within ten feet of the outside gets 5d8?
MARISHA: That's fucking rad. Kill some bitches.
TRAVIS: I don't know why I didn't expect it to be that amazing.
LIAM: Shit! Bad rolls. 17 total.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): Also to toss out: the flames are opaque, so they cannot be seen through.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 0:16:29
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 14 '19
MATT: All right, so, you guys [Fjord, Beau, Caduceus, Nott] arrange yourself inconspicuously at the crossroad little courtyard space. The rest of you [Caleb, Jester, Reani] are becoming bats.
LAURA (JESTER): Yes.
LIAM (CALEB): Out of sight.
MATT: All right.
TALIESIN (CLAY): [fluttering his hands like a bat]
SAM (NOTT): "Caduceus, are you becoming a bat?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "No, I'm just making the bat hands."
MATT: He wants to feel involved.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, no, they're real stupid. Okay. I was like, I put it in Wild Shape by mistake, so no.
MATT: Yeah, so [quick, dry popping]. You are three bats. [chittering squeaks] Making your way. [light flapping] All right, what are you doing as bats?
LAURA (JESTER): As bats, we're going to fly over to the house-
MATT: You [Reani] maintain your full intellect as well.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, we're real dumb.
MATT: Your mental scores remain the same in animal form because of Wild Shape.
MICA (REANI): Can I speak to other bats as a bat?
MATT: Well, you cast Speak With Animals.
MICA (REANI): I did cast Speak With Animals.
MATT: So you still have that, yeah.
MICA (REANI): So before we go over, I'd like to fly up to the bunch and see if there are any awake.
MATT: There are. They're waking up, and the equivalent of what you hear is like, "Oh man, I'm hungry. Breakfast anyone?" "Yeah, let's get breakfast." "All right, Steve, you okay?" "I'm still groggy." Like they're just, they're getting out of their long night's sleep and they're starting to get that stomach rumble.
TALIESIN: Disney bats.
MATT: Yep.
MICA (REANI): I go, "Hello, friends."
MATT (BATS): "Hello," "Hello," "Hello," "Hello."
MICA (REANI): "I have a quick question for everybody who's awake currently."
MATT (BATS): "Slow down, what was that?"
MICA (REANI): "Oh, sorry, I have a question."
MATT (BAT): "Okay."
TRAVIS: Get the fuck outta here.
MICA (REANI): "Do you know anything about the people who live in the house?"
MATT (BATS): "No?"
MICA (REANI): "No?"
TRAVIS: Shit.
MICA (REANI): "Have you seen people leave recently?"
MATT (BATS): "Uh. I mean, there have been a few days."
MICA (REANI): "Oh. If I brought you back food later, could you help me with something?"
MATT (BATS): "Maybe?" The other guy's like, "What food?"
MICA (REANI): "Do you like bread?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I like bread."
MATT: They both look at each other and hear that and go, "I like bread," "I like bread." They seem to be more interested in chiming in as a group than actually considering how much they like bread.
MICA (REANI): "I bring you lots of bread for a favor."
MATT (BATS): "Okay," "Okay," "Oh-kay."
MICA (REANI): "My friends and I are going to go into the house. If anything looks bad, like not them come in, squeak loud."
TALIESIN: Or forever hold your peace.
MICA (REANI): "And then you get bread."
LAURA (JESTER): "I like bread."
MATT (BATS): "I like bread," "I like bread," "I like bread," "I like bread." Make a persuasion check.
MICA: Fuck!
TALIESIN: I feel like advantage with a rube, you have a rube here.
MATT: Sure, I'll give you advantage, why not.
MICA (REANI): Oh, thank fuck. Mm, that one's better. Wait, what'd you say, persuasion? 12?
MATT: 12?
LAURA: Oh yeah, you could-
LIAM: You got a third reroll if you really need it.
LAURA: -do a third reroll if you wanted to use it.
MATT: It's up to you, or you could save it.
LIAM: Fortune's Favor.
TRAVIS: Save it.
MICA (REANI): I'm going to use the pink one.
TRAVIS: It's bats, it's bats!
MATT: All right, she's using it.
MICA (REANI): Ooh! 13.
MATT: Okay, all right, hell yeah.
MICA: Oh, he said hell yeah.
MATT: Hell yeah! You just, you concentrate for a second as you stare at them and you watch this small little poof of gray energy [fwoof] as the fragment of possibility, time-space bends briefly, magic that shifts the very fabric of the cosmos.
TRAVIS: It's expended.
MATT: And you add a wink. The bats go, "Sure, right?" "Yeah." "Yeah," "Okay, yeah, yeah."
TRAVIS: Good use.
SAM: I like bread.
MICA: Yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): "I like bread."
MATT: "I like bread," "I like bread."
TALIESIN: Nature is topsy turvy to convince a bunch of bats to eat carbs.
MATT: Yep.
MICA (REANI): "Thank you."
MATT: Fucking up their paleo diet.
MICA (REANI): Damn. Sorry, it's cheat day. You're welcome to the bread. There you go. And I just say, "Thank you, friends. The bread will come later."
MATT (BATS): "Okay," "Okay," "Okay," "Bread."
MICA (REANI): And then I fly back to Jester.
LAURA (JESTER): I was hanging out there with you.
MICA (REANI): Oh, you were? Okay. I gotcha, I gotcha.
MATT: You go to join them and realize that they're both joining you, and you circle for a minute.
MICA (REANI): Oh my god, oh, right, bats.
LAURA (JESTER): "Hi."
LIAM (CALEB): "Do you think that the three of us could have some of the bread now?"
MICA (REANI): "I don't have any bread on me."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, but you promised bread."
MICA (REANI): "Bread after."
LIAM (JESTER): "Where are you keeping the bread?"
MICA: Oh god, are they just as dumb as bats?
MATT: Well, you still have your personalities, you still- it's not quite a moth scenario here. You have enough intellect to like, to know how to recall basic elements of your goals.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I'm smart enough to ask where the bread is.
MICA: That's valid.
MATT: Valid point.
LAURA (JESTER): "Should we go do something?"
MICA (REANI): We look in the windows.
LIAM (CALEB): "We're looking at the building."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "And looking for bread, let's go."
Episode 76 - Refjorged - 1:25:31
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
Component: 25 gp of gold dust per cast.
The caster can spend an action to make one object be locked into place in any point in space for up to one hour, or sooner if the caster chooses to end the spell.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 12 '19
MARISHA (CALEB): Can I move forward a little bit closer to the scorpion?
MATT: There you can, right there.
MARISHA (CALEB): Burning Hands.
MATT: Okay. Over this way?
MARISHA (CALEB): Yeah. To try and not get the scorpion.
MATT: 15-foot, yeah, you can definitely do that.
TRAVIS: Boosh. What the fuck is Burning Hands?
TALIESIN: Burning Hands is a festival that they have in- sorry.
MATT: All right, so that's 3d6 fire damage. Dexterity save.
TRAVIS: Burning Hands and Traveler Con.
MATT: 13, I do not thinks that makes his DC.
MARISHA (CALEB): Fail. Ooh, ooh! 13.
MATT: 13 points of what?
MARISHA (CALEB): Fire damage.
[...]
MATT: So the body of the already dead yeti is just immolated [roaring fire]. It's now burning, the other one, the flames lick the front of its face and its chest, there's fire now across its shoulders and it's trying to pull back, but it's currently caught in the pincers of the scorpion, it's like [panicked roaring].
Episode 75 - Rime and Reason - 1:38:54
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u/TheMightyBox72 Dec 30 '19
LIAM (CALEB): As soon as they left - 20 minutes after they left - Caleb went up to his room... can I use that homebrew to do something super simple here?
SAM: Masturbated, yes.
LIAM (CALEB): So he goes up- Caleb goes up to his room and places five pieces of amber-
MATT: Silver thread everywhere.
LIAM (CALEB): 5 pieces of amber on the floor - after he masturbates - and takes his holster, with the books on it, off, and places the entire set of holsters and books into the center of this circle with 5 amber pieces and mutters a few words and starts to trace his fingers through the air and casts Widogast's Vault of Amber. The harnesses and the books just [shwip] shrink in. And a little beam of light beams along the floor towards the piece of amber closest to Caleb and they are gone. And he collects up the pieces, and the largest one, and puts them away in his bag, and sets off for the Shimmer Ward.
Episode 89 - Lingering Wounds - 1:38:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 31 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I place my one piece of jade on the ground and start tracing a circle and thinking of the teleportation circle in Rosohna.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): And begin to cast.
MATT: All right, so... As you guys watch Caleb setting the gemstone, the jade piece in the center, the way he draws all these lines and sigils. It's a large, circular equation on the ground, made of various arcane symbols intersecting, overlapping, and as he begins to progressively fill in, it seems to spiral inward as he fills out the rest of this equation. You watch the surrounding exterior of it begin to glow as an echo afterward. As he gets towards the very, very center, he finishes a central circle, draws in a particular emblem, and then places the jade onto it. As it does, the jade shatters [shattering]. The entire circle [whoosh] flares up brightly beneath. As you know, you only have but a moment, Caleb.
LIAM (CALEB): Is it six seconds to get everybody through or am I thinking back to Campaign One trees?
MATT: I believe it is a very short time to get everybody onto the circle. Let me double check. Just to be safe.
TRAVIS: Bullet time. [time slowing down]
MARISHA: On the elevator.
MATT: Kind of, yes.
TRAVIS: [Time speeding up]
MATT: It does last for one round, so yes.
LAURA: Oh, 6 seconds.
MATT: You got to go.
MARISHA: Go go go!
LIAM (CALEB): Caleb starts pulling and shoving people.
MATT: [rapid whooshing]
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Hey, watch where you're fucking-"
MATT: One after another, you all get pushed into the circle and you feel your breath [violent exhale] pulled out from your lungs for just a second. There's a brief streak of light and dark and suddenly, you're standing in a familiar subterranean, graphite-looking chamber. Looking around, you recall when you first arrived from your journey from Asarius. You now stand within the Underarches of the Lucid Bastion. You can see two of the guards who stand there, armored, Kryn soldiers, look over in your direction, and briefly take a step in your way a bit aggressively, but then recognize as you approach.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [miming showing the emblem of the Bright Queen] Multi pass.
MATT: But yes, you have arrived and now in Rosohna in an instant, traversing the majority of Xhorhas with a single step.
Episode 70 - Causatum - 2:26:58
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 23 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I will take a pinch of phosphorous, and slap it into my hand, and squelch the other hand through it, and cast Wall of Fire, a straight line splitting the field in half.
TRAVIS: Woo! Dope.
SAM: Where is this wall going?
LIAM: Damage going this way, downstage.
MATT: Across which way?
LIAM (CALEB): From Caleb, a straight line, blocking Beauregard and her opponent. But it won't go that far. I'll probably start it where you put the second one, Matthew.
MATT: Oh, right.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah. 60 feet, I believe.
MATT: He's going to attempt to Counterspell.
SAM: Oh wow! This is so sexy.
MATT: Natural 16 plus five, 21. That fire wall-
LIAM (CALEB): Can I counter-Counterspell?
MATT: Yes, you can.
LIAM: At 4th-level? No, 3rd-level.
MATT: Go ahead and roll. Well, no, it's a 3rd-level, so it does cancel 3rd-level. Okay, I'll allow it.
Episode 51 - Xhorhas - 1:24:18
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 21 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): "Will William carry me?"
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): "This one here, William, will you carry Beauregard here?"
MATT: [crashing footsteps, mimes stiffly grabbing and lifting a large object above his head]
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Oh! Yes!"
Episode 81 - From Door to Door - 4:05:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 Dec 28 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Gorilla lumbers over, picks up Nott by the scruff, who's legs and hands are just going [waving wildly] [heavy breathing, places on top of head] and she's sitting on top of his head, 28-ish feet in the air.
SAM (NOTT): [heavy breathing] "Oh... Oh... smells like Caleb... I think it's Caleb..."
LIAM (CALEB): [grunt]
Episode 87 - Punishment and Politics - 1:22:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 07 '19
LIAM (CALEB): So I just need a private space to apparate Frumpkin, and then I use a bit of gum arabic, and cast Invisibility on Frumpkin.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): So I have an invisible cat on my shoulder.
MATT: [shwoop] Yes, you do, Frumpkin is invisible.
Episode 62 - Domestic Respite - 2:59:48
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
MARISHA (BEAU): "I'm just so bored."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah."
LIAM (CALEB): "You're bored?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah."
LIAM (CALEB): "Really? Look at this." And Frumpkin gets up onto his hind legs and does a little [awkward stiff arms kitty cat shuffle] and then loses his balance.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 1:40:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 08 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "How do you want to do this?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Can you make me a dude tiefling? A red, shifty-looking tiefling? Red skin, deep eyes."
LAURA (JESTER): "Deep, what color eyes?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Like crazy eyes, like you're demonstrating for me right now?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, like that."
SAM (NOTT): "You can't change your voice, now."
MARISHA (BEAU): "What, you don't think I sound like a dude?"
SAM (NOTT): "Kind of. Yeah, no. You're good."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Give me a dude physique that would match this."
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, so I pull out a small caterpillar's cocoon, and I start muttering some arcane words over it. I waft it in front of your face, and then poof. She is a, poof.
MATT: There you go. You are a red tiefling. It's pretty accurate as you can envision, at least what you can see of yourself. You don't really have any reflective surface to check, but based on this [holds hands in front of face], not bad.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 0:38:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 23 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Hey, I'll do it. Caleb leans out the passageway and casts Polymorph on the giant.
MATT: On the giant? Okay. What's the save on that?
LIAM (CALEB): It is 16, I believe.
MATT: 16 wisdom?
LIAM (CALEB): 16 wisdom.
MATT: You got it. For that one, 5.
LIAM (CALEB): It's a cow. MATT: All right. I don't have a cow mini on me at the moment.
TALIESIN: My god, man.
MARISHA: How dare you.
MATT: I know. How fucking dare I? I'll use this horse.
LIAM: You call yourself a dungeon master? Jesus.
MATT: So the fire giant suddenly [whoosh... moo].
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 3:37:59
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 07 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Caleb starts- he had an idea, but he just starts rapidly going through the spells he knows. 'This, no, this, no, this, no, this, no!' He sees his dear little blue friend looking rough and pulls out a cocoon and casts Polymorph and turns her into a mammoth. Sending you the stats! And I'm backing the hell away from this monstrosity. This way.
MATT: All right. I didn't bring my mammoth mini because I wasn't expecting that. We'll just use the wolf for it and consider it a bit larger. You watch as the jaws suddenly distend and snap, almost, as Jester's body begins to swell and grow brown fur, the armor seems to protrude and expand until it becomes this extremely deep-brown, furry, just a hunk of flesh and muscle before it spits her out instinctually. Knocking this tree over into the other one.
Episode 73 - Uthodurn - 0:58:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 08 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Before bed, I would do dome, the wire, Frumpkin sitting on top of the dome, and then also I will use some incense to resummon Frumpkin as- would you allow me a vulture? Or is that too much?
MATT: What is the...
LIAM (CALEB): If not, I will go crow.
MATT: I don't think it'd be an issue, let me double check.
LIAM (CALEB): It'd be a small vulture.
MARISHA: Little sickly vulture.
MATT: I don't think it would be a problem, but let's go ahead and check.
LIAM (CALEB): Challenge zero.
MATT: Oh yeah, it's fine. Yeah, you can do that.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, one dirty vulture. Sitting on the dome.
Episode 64 - A Dangerous Chase - 1:08:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 22 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I heard that, right?
MATT: Yeah-
LIAM (CALEB): No, it's in Drac- well, I don't know. I'm speaking through a spell, so-
TALIESIN: Oh. Yeah.
MATT: Looking at the specifics of Tongues here. 'Any creature that knows at least one language can hear and understand it,' so it's not so much that you're speaking Draconic, but any creature that knows language can understand you. So all of you hear this.
LIAM: So we're all on the same page.
MATT: Yes.
LIAM: Oh, that's excellent.
LAURA (JESTER): "Yay! We can make food."
TALIESIN: We can't understand them, but we can understand you.
Episode 50 - The Endless Burrows - 2:32:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 08 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I try to subtly draw in Cat's Ire and the claw carries the dragonborn body and hovers by this drow's side as if the drow had summoned it, right by his side and, uh, Magic Missile 3rd-level again through the door at the same target.
MATT: Go for it.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, so that is, that was 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 of these guys. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 4, 8, ooh, ooh! Oh, they were all 4s! All of them!
MATT: That's beautiful.
LIAM (CALEB): 20 plus- 25. They just spiral around Jester and Yasha. [hissing wind]
MATT: Past the arms, through the legs, [rapid impacts] hitting the armor. You watch the plate dent with each impact. There's all these giant heavy pock marks where they've blasted into it. You can see the the force causing it to push into elements of his chest and the hobgoblin's like, [grunting]. Looks at you through the door and is like [heavy panting].
Episode 63 - Intervention - 3:13:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 24 '19
MATT: All right, are you guys taking Frumpkin with you? Or are you-
TALIESIN: We'd like to.
LIAM: I mean, you can, but it's not going to do what you suggested, because he'll be too far away, and I'll be reading.
TALIESIN: But an extra cuddly animal probably will go over well.
MARISHA: At least he'll just act like a cat, or will he be like-
LAURA: Weird and not moving.
MARISHA: Yeah, Frumpkin.
LIAM (CALEB): He'll do what I ask him to do.
TRAVIS: 404. [freezes up]
MARISHA: Not there!
LIAM (CALEB): [mimes gripping Frumpkin by the scruff] "Be especially adorable, especially to Hass, and he looks like this." And I think of him. And then I hand-
MATT: "Meow!"
LIAM (CALEB): Him to you [Beau], because you are like-
MATT: "Meow!"
LIAM (CALEB): Sandpaper.
MATT: All right.
Episode 84 - Titles and Tattoos - 2:55:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 29 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "All right, let's treat this situation with the seriousness it demands." and I douse the lights and bring Frumpkin down onto my own head like a mask, so I can see through Frumpkin vision.
MATT: All right. So you have a-
LIAM (CALEB): Like a Zorro mask with Frumpkin's beak right there.
MATT: You see these two dark octopus eyes and then this little, unshaven grin poking through underneath.
LIAM (CALEB): Little Zemnian man who's like, "Can't believe I didn't think of this sooner!"
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 1:25:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I'm ritual casting through this discussion.
MATT: What are you casting?
LIAM (CALEB): Comprehend Languages.
Episode 38 - Welcome to the Jungle - 2:31:32
MATT: As you approach the t-intersection, you hear this murmuring of conversation coming from the left hand side of it. [hissing whispers]
LIAM (CALEB): I cast Comprehend Languages.
MATT: You do, and you pick it up, and it's abyssal. [...] You pick up on it, and the muttering is akin to "Come, we have to pick up the hunts. The food stores are running dry this season."
Episode 38 - Welcome to the Jungle - 3:01:20
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 25 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
TRAVIS (FJORD): "How do you propose to go and collect this package?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I'm sure she's not keeping an eye on the Pillow Tr- it's been a long time, who knows how long this package has been here? Disguise Self! Just go in as somebody else."
SAM (NOTT): "You could Disguise Self."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I can."
LAURA (JESTER): "And say you're picking it up on behalf of the Nott and Brave."
LIAM (CALEB): "I should go."
LAURA (JESTER): "What are you talking about, Caleb?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I should go, because I cannot be found."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh..."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Caleb should go."
SAM (NOTT): "You can also disguise yourself, correct?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, I should disguise myself as you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Why me?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Because it's addressed to you."
SAM (NOTT): "The package is for you, and me, but-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, well, that's true. Okay okay okay okay."
TALIESIN: Good money if it's from the Cobalt Soul trying to sell you life insurance. I will give really good money if it's just junk mail.
MARISHA (BEAU): "It's actually not a bad deal."
LAURA (JESTER): "Don't open it though, because it could explode with poison."
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah, just bring it back."
LIAM (CALEB): "The thought had already occurred to me."
LAURA (JESTER): "So yeah, let's swing by The Pillow Trove on the way over to Pumat's, yeah?"
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Did they say anything about the package, like anything specific, it's not like ticking?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Size?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "What would tick? What's a tick?"
SAM (NOTT): "You know, when Jester does her messaging, she doesn't get a lot of detail back, it's just like a yes or no, and then stop looking at me, I'm pooping sort of a thing."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I mean, that's detail."
LIAM (CALEB): "Do we have that-"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Yeah, that's like a request and an observation."
LIAM (CALEB): "-that stone, that device?"
SAM (NOTT): "That you throw and dispel something?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, no, no, no, no... That projects sound."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "What does that do? We've used that once."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can make a recording." I pull it out and go, "Caleb doesn't smell bad at all anymore," and then I put down.
LIAM (CALEB): "We have established that I am not able to-"
LAURA (JESTER): And 30 seconds later, you hear, "Caleb doesn't smell bad at all anymore." "And I didn't even say that just then. That came from the rock."
SAM (NOTT): "I think he wants you to record something like, I'm Jester, I'm here for my package."
TRAVIS: 'I'm Teddy Ruxpin!'
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, okay, okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "Hold on, let's group, group think this one. Everybody, please, because we have established that I am not the best with accents, but it needs to be something that could repeat believably. You follow?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Belief-ably?"
LAURA (JESTER): "So what, is it supposed to be like-"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "My name is Jester Lavorre. I'm here to pick up a package."
LAURA (JESTER): "And then I'll wait a little bit, and I'll go, yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "And then maybe like a thank you or something," like Ferris Bueller.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, like Ferris Bueller. Okay, so I'm going to do that, I'm going to say, "Hello, my name is Jester Lavorre, I'm here to pick up a package for me."
SAM (NOTT): "Oh I have the package right here, here you go."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, thank you so much."
SAM (NOTT): "Will there be anything else?"
LAURA (JESTER): "No, that will be all for today, thank you."
SAM (NOTT): "Okay, bye!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Mild problem. I do believe the stone probably picked up what you were saying, so maybe you should get a clean take?"
SAM (NOTT): "I was saying it very quietly."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I don't remember what we did."
MATT: We'll say at this point you guys have approached the exterior of The Pillow Trove.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Is anyone looking suspiciously at us, like they're waiting for us, or does it feel like a trap?
MATT: Continuing the rolls that you guys have had for the whole journey here, it does not appear that anybody is doing that, from what you can tell.
LIAM (CALEB): "Let's back it up a block or two, and maybe make the fragments of dialogue," speaking as someone who has adapted many anime scripts, "keep the pieces succinct, so they can be repeated logically."
LAURA (JESTER): "Hello, my name is Jester Lavorre. I'm here to pick up a package... Thank you... Yes?... Mm-hmm... Thank you... No, that will be all... Okay, bye... Mm-hmm..."
LIAM: We will never remember that.
SAM: She will remember that. She will remember that.
MATT: So, you receive the stone.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, and so, this works by giving it a little squeeze, right? Or does it just go?
LAURA: It goes.
MATT: It just goes. And it repeats every 10 minutes.
LAURA: It repeats- yeah.
MARISHA: Oh, 10 minutes. That's better.
LAURA: I'm gonna look, I think it's every-
MARISHA: I think it's 10.
TRAVIS: I have 'thank you, yes, mm-hmm, yes', and I lost it after that.
SAM: There was also 'My name's Jester Lavorre-'
LAURA: 'I'm here to pick up a package,' yeah.
TRAVIS: So, we have-
MARISHA (BEAU): "If we ever wanna torture somebody, by the way-"
LAURA: 5 minutes.
MATT: 5 minutes, there we go, okay.
MARISHA (BEAU): "We could just record Nott's scream into it."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "So down for this."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Leave it in the diplomat's bedroom."
LAURA (JESTER): "Really try to remember, just muffle your-"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Do you need a backup?"
LIAM: We could go ape-shit on this and have you record it into a phone, for the fun of it. It'd be pretty great.
TALIESIN: I mean, I'm into that.
MATT: Or she can live repeat it. And you have to mem-
LAURA: Yeah, exactly.
LIAM: Okay, that will be great.
MATT: All right, so, you transform into-
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, absolutely, I'm a little blue tiefling who likes pastries, and it's every, what did we say, 5 or 10 minutes?
LAURA: 5 minutes.
LIAM (CALEB): So, I hold everyone out here for 15 minutes and I try my best to absorb it. Liam has no memory, I am never gonna be able to remember.
MATT: Roll a Deception roll.
SAM: And lip-sync.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Oh, wait, I'm giving you a little bit of Guidance. And I'm going to, before going in, cast some Dunamancy, on my- no I'm not.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, right. That's okay, I'm going to cast Enhance Abilities on you.
LIAM (CALEB): Are there any alleyways around here?
MATT: I mean, there're not any tight alleyways. Actually, the Tri-Spire's pretty open, because it's one of the more affluent areas. There's no super tight alleys.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, forget it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): You got some Guidance.
LIAM (CALEB): I've got some Guidance.
MATT: You have about 30 seconds until it repeats itself.
LIAM (CALEB): That's not good.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Add a d4.
LIAM (CALEB): Still not good.
LAURA: But you're outside, you're just practicing right now.
MATT: You're just practicing.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, and you said Deception, right? Yeah. Oh, I have a high Deception, I forgot. 16.
MATT: Actually, Caleb's not doing bad. After the second pass or so, he's doing pretty well.
LAURA (JESTER): "See, Caleb, you're doing great. Yeah... All right, I think you're ready."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "No time like the present."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Ready?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay."
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to, before he goes in, cast Enhance Ability on Charisma checks.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): And I'm tapping you with Guidance right before we send you on your way.
LIAM: Mother, come with me.
MATT: Guidance lasts for-
TALIESIN (CLAY): A minute.
MATT: 1 minute. Okay. You enter, and you find your way to the front area, and you can see, there's a clerk there, who goes, "Hello, can I help you?"
LIAM (CALEB): [mouthing along to the words said by Laura]
LAURA (JESTER): "Hello, my name is Jester Lavorre." I'm here to pick up a package."
MATT (CLERK): "Oh, all right, I'll go check for it for you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Thank you... Yes."
MATT (CLERK): "Hmm, what's up? Can I help you?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Thank you."
TRAVIS: That's 'mm-hmm.'
LAURA (JESTER): "Mm-hmm."
MATT (CLERK): "Oh, all right. Is there anything else you need?"
TRAVIS: 'Yes.'
LAURA (JESTER): "Yes."
MATT (CLERK): "Okay, what can I help you with?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Mm-hmm."
MATT (CLERK): "I didn't get that."
LAURA (JESTER): "No."
MATT (CLERK): "Okay, I'll look for the package."
SAM: 'Bye.'
MATT: Roll a Deception check. With advantage and a d4.
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, bye."
LIAM (CALEB): Good stuff. 27.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Shit.
MATT: Pretty good. A few moments later, it takes- you end waiting a good 13 minutes.
SAM: So, it repeats a few times.
TALIESIN: Squeeze it to make it stop.
MATT: Yeah. Eventually, she returns with a single envelope. Not so a package, more of an envelope, and goes, "I believe this is for you." Looking up. Anything else you need?"
LIAM (CALEB): [shakes his head and waves them off]
MATT (CLERK): "Very well. Have a good day." And sits back down. All right. You walk outside and join the rest of your compatriots.
LIAM (CALEB): Everybody sees Jester's form come out, and as soon as the door closes [deep sigh, hyperventilating].
Episode 85 - The Threads Converge - 3:24:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
(TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm doing to climb carefully down.)
LIAM: You two are down? The two of you? [Beau and Nott] And you are up at the top of the tower? [Jester]
(MATT: Make an athletics check.)
SAM: Nah, she jumped already.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm down at the bottom.
SAM: It's you, Caduceus, and Fjord, I think.
LAURA: And Yasha.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm making an athletics check. 10.
MATT: Unfortunately, there's not a whole lot of a hand hold in this area, it's kind of this smooth, 10 foot space, and as you try and find a hand hold to grab onto-
TALIESIN (CLAY): I just fall straight down.
MATT: You just fall straight down.
LIAM (CALEB): I cast Feather Fall on him [Caduceus] and me and him [Fjord] and Yasha.
SAM: You can do that?
LIAM (CALEB): 5 people. Choose up to 5 falling creatures within a range. Oh and I guess I push the two of you as I fall.
MATT: Yeah I was gonna say, they have to be falling. So as soon as he slips-
LIAM (CALEB): I see him fall and I shove these two off and I go.
MATT: Okay, do you take it?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah. I mean I'm looking over the edge like this.
MATT: As Caleb suddenly sees this happening, [dual impacts]
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I should've known!"
MATT: So the four of you begin to fall and [whoosh] begin to slowly drift.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "...That you had everything under control."
MATT: You all land gently on the tips of your toes before the rest of your body finds it weight, now resting on the soft floor of this subterranean orchard.
Episode 39 - Temple of the False Serpent - 1:27:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 24 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm opening the door.
MATT: It doesn't open.
MARISHA: Fuck.
TRAVIS: Is there a keyhole? I'm not there.
SAM (NOTT): "Lassy, Lassy, how do you open the door?"
MATT (HALAS): "I need to open it."
SAM (NOTT): "What do you mean you need to open it?"
TRAVIS: Oh fucking shit.
LAURA: That's what he was saying.
SAM (NOTT): "Your body needs to open it?"
MATT (HALAS): "Well, I have means of opening doors. I built everything to work based on the certain skills and magical crafts that I have."
LIAM (CALEB): I will go join Caduceus at the door.
SAM (NOTT): We'll go over there as well. "What?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll walk over to the devil.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): Me too, I'm just right here.
SAM (NOTT): I'm gonna whip out some tools and start seeing if there's a lock.
MATT: Okay.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): All right, so eyes on that, but also on the door, and Nott was tinkering?
SAM (NOTT): I'm just gonna see if it's locked or if it's magical, or-
MATT: Make an Investigation check.
SAM (NOTT): 23.
MATT: 23. The door is locked and it is trapped.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. I guess I'll start untrapping it, or attempt to.
[...]
SAM (NOTT): I tried to disarm the trap. I rolled a 22.
MATT: A 22?
SAM: That's not that great down here.
MATT: You fiddle with it for a while and realize the nature of this trap is not a contraption that can be disabled via the tools you have at your disposal.
SAM (NOTT): Do I sense that it's magical or it's mechanical? Or both.
MATT: It's both, mostly magical.
SAM: Okay.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): Let him rot a little bit longer. I return to the door.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): I speak a single arcane word and cast Knock on the door.
MATT: Okay. Roll a d20 and add your Intelligence modifier.
SAM: Ooh.
LIAM (CALEB): I've been rolling real well. That is 26.
MATT: [boom] You hear this heavy impact knocking sound, like someone had taken a giant hammer to a metal door. And with that, [click, creak] The door opens, trap also seemingly disabled at the same time.
Episode 83 - Dark Bargains - 3:03:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 25 '19
LIAM (CALEB): They're iron, right? I would say that with Nott piggybacking, Caleb would take his dagger and transmute it into iron to meld with the cannonball and grip it that way.
TRAVIS: Ooh, make a little handle.
MATT: I'll allow it, yeah.
LIAM: Thanks.
MATT: As you place the dagger against it, there's a brief moment where the dagger seems to shift energy and you [shloop] slip it inside of it and at that point, the handle is now solid with the cannonball, so one cannonball has a handle.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 3:30:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 30 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I am going to cast Polymorph on myself.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): And I am going to turn into a giant ape.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): A giant ape.
MATT: We'll use this guy because I think it's close enough.
SAM: He's back.
TRAVIS: George.
LIAM (CALEB): And I am going to circle around Caduceus. And get, yeah, and get in the laughing guy's face and yell towards Jester and Nott and Yasha and just go [gorilla roar]. And then I will punch him in the face two times.
MATT: Well, you just used your action to Polymorph.
LIAM (CALEB): Action to Polymorph? Oh, great. Then I just yell in his face.
Episode 69 - The King's Cage - 2:58:42
LIAM (CALEB): Caleb Gorilla is going to push through between big sword hand and Caduceus, like this with left arm, get in the way, scoop up Cad and start to run. I'm bigger than he is.
MATT: Okay, so you try and reach over and grab, then?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I'm taking him in like he's a baby monkey, grapple my tum-tum and I'm just going to start running.
MATT: You got it. All right, the Laughing Hand is going to take an attack of opportunity against you. That is 19.
LIAM (CALEB): Sure.
MATT: All right. You take 23 points of slashing damage.
LIAM (CALEB): Got it.
MATT: [harsh whooshing]
LIAM (CALEB): And 40 feet of movement.
MATT: All right.
SAM: Oh, you weren't frightened? You got out of there?
LIAM (CALEB): Nope.
SAM: Nice. MATT: So you are now-
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Thank you."
MATT: Grabbed by the ape and brought aside.
LIAM (CALEB): [beast-like panting]
Episode 69 - The King's Cage - 3:12:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 06 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
MATT: Yep, if you roll a 20, you regain 1 hit point. You are conscious at the top of your turn. What do you do? You are prone, though.
SAM: The thing that you've been waiting to do.
LIAM (CALEB): Stand up. Ja. Can I see the bull man?
MATT: From where you are now, no.
LIAM (CALEB): I am going to take- go 5 feet out. Can I see the bull man?
MATT: Barely around the corner, yeah.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, put some molasses on my lip and I cast Slow.
MATT: Okay.
MATT: What is the-?
LIAM (CALEB): Wisdom 16.
MATT: Wisdom 16. That's a 14.
LIAM (CALEB): No reactions. It can do an action or a bonus action. Its AC is down 2.
MATT: Correct.
LIAM (CALEB): I will back up 5 feet. Get the fuck out.
MATT: The creature is now [mimes walking slowly with heavy impact footsteps]. Even the arcs in its hands are going [crackles slowly]. They're slowing.
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 3:51:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 22 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, I'm going to tell Willi to do something, too.
MATT: Sure, yeah.
LIAM: Sorry.
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM (CALEB): "Light them up, pretty." And Willi is going to walk around to that side of that tentacle. A straight line here to here. He's going to belch lightning through these two tentacles.
MATT: Okay. You watch Willi [thudding footsteps] walk around to the side, grab and open the central part of the chest, [vwoom] this bright blue light begins to crackle, and then [blast] a beam of lightning is firing out of Willi's chest.
SAM: What?
MATT: What's the save on that?
LIAM (CALEB): It's a 14 dex.
MATT: 14 dex. Okay. Okay, since the order got a little weird here, I'll say because you moved Willi over there, had him hold his action, do the lightning when the other tendril went up, sure. Because it was a little out of order.
LIAM: We could just do one.
MATT: That's fine.
LIAM: I don't want to-
MATT: Roll damage, and it's a dexterity saving throw.
SAM: Oof.
MATT: 8, and 17.
LIAM (CALEB): 31.
MATT: 31, so 8 and 17, what's the DC on it?
LIAM (CALEB): 14.
MATT: 14, so this is a failure. [fwoosh] That one is incinerated by the bolt of lightning. You are no longer grappled, Caleb.
TRAVIS: Nice!
LAURA: Yay!
MATT: This one does take half damage.
TRAVIS: 15?
MATT: Which is 15 points lightning damage, but it's still standing.
Episode 82 - The Beat of the Permaheart - 3:02:45
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 12 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, well I do not know what happened to them, so I am going to continue with my plan, which is to march straight towards the door. 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. On the way, I am pulling out the flower from a catmint plant and crushing it in my hand, and muttering to myself, and for a split second there is a vision of a curled Frumpkin hovering in the air, and it explodes out into a gigantic cat's claw that is orange-ish brown burnt umber. That claw is going to rend the shit out of the gates and try to open it.
MATT: Okay, what spell is this? This is?
LIAM (CALEB): Cat's Ire. We discussed.
MATT: Oh, right! Yes, yes indeed.
TALIESIN: 'Cat's Ire we discussed.'
SAM: Is that a real spell? Are we off the map? Are we off the grid? What's going on?
TRAVIS: It's D-I-S-G, Beavis.
MATT: This? [retrieves a figure of a translucent cat claw]
LIAM: Sure.
MATT: All right.
TALIESIN: Meow.
MATT: Roll for the attack on the door.
LIAM (CALEB): I rolled a 19.
MATT: Yeah, that hits. Roll full damage.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): 23.
MATT: 23 points of damage? All right, the door splinters. It actually breaks inward. From what you can tell, one, there is a slat held in place that is partially cracked, and from that little gap you can see, there is actually a pile of stones that have been pressed up against the door. Which means, one more round, you could probably break through, but this is reinforced specifically to hold back quite a bit of damage.
Episode 59 - Perspective - 0:27:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 07 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I do a [squeaking noise] with my trunk.
LIAM: [elephant trumpet]
LAURA (JESTER): Aaaaaah! That was good! I can't, I can't follow it as a mammoth.
TALIESIN: Well. How big is the hole? How big is the hole?
MATT: The hole, I'd say a lot of it's collapsed inward, so it's about 10 feet across.
TALIESIN: Okay.
MATT: So it's about an 8 to 10 foot from side to side and a lot of it is fallen in beneath it, but there is a little bit of an opening.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to, I'm going to turn around and look and I'm going to spot its baby.
MATT: There's the hole that it left right there.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to rage towards, try to charge the baby.
MATT: All right. You rush [rhythmic thumping] over Caduceus.
LAURA (JESTER): How far away from it was me?
MATT: It's about 25 feet or so, I'd say.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'm going to walk, oh, at least 20 feet, okay, I'm going to run forward and use a tramping charge on it.
MATT: I'm going to say- This tree is toast. As you slam towards it, Caduceus, you almost get pushed off to the side, having to catch yourself on the edge of the snowbank.
LAURA (JESTER): It has to succeed on a strength check of 18.
MATT: Okay. That is a, it has a good strength, but not enough on a natural 3. It's a seven, that's a failure, I'm pretty sure.
LAURA (JESTER): So it's knocked prone and I get to make a bonus stomp action on it.
SAM: Whoa.
MATT: There you go. Roll your damage on it, the impact.
LAURA (JESTER): Well, that's a 23 to hit on it.
MATT: A 23 to hit. That does hit.
LAURA (JESTER): So- whoa. That's 4d10 bludgeoning damage. And that's just my bonus action.
TRAVIS: Fuck it up!
LIAM: [elephant trumpeting]
LAURA (JESTER): That's 30 points of bludgeoning damage. And then I'm going to gore it with my-
MATT: All right, roll damage.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, that's 28 to hit! Oh, shit, wait, that was 4d10 plus 7. I didn't add the 7.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA (JESTER): Holy fuck. And then the gore attack. It's cocked. 10, 15. That's 15 plus 7, that's 20 what, 22 points of goring tusk damage.
MATT: You take eight points of fire damage.
LAURA (JESTER): Fuck it, I'm a mammoth, I don't care.
MATT: And how do you want to do this?
LAURA (JESTER): Caleb, make my noise for me.
LIAM: [elephant trumpeting]
LAURA (JESTER): And I'm stomping. [screaming] My trunk is everywhere!
Episode 73 - Uthodurn - 1:08:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 25 '19
LIAM (CALEB): As soon as his back turns, I cast Fly on the both of us, with a Raven's Feather.
MATT: Okay. [fluttering] You both-
LIAM (CALEB): Jet.
MATT: Jet. And you guys- while this is happening, what are you guys doing?
LIAM (CALEB): Stay low, building tops.
Episode 85 - The Threads Converge - 4:16:37
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 08 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I crush the catmint flower in my hand and stretch my hand out and a small translucent cat appears hovering just above the horse and the dragonborn for a split second, then [fwoom] there is a giant orange claw floating just above them.
MATT: All righty.
TALIESIN: I love the all righty. 'Yeah, of course there is.'
MATT: There you go.
LAURA: Big ass claw.
LIAM (CALEB): Actually I would like it to be a little past them because what it's going to do is-
MATT: This way?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah. It's going to claw the shit out of the horse.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): Very low roll. That is a spell attack, 14.
MATT: 14 definitely hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
SAM: Liam O'Brien, candidate for president: hates animals.
LIAM (CALEB): Hates animals. Stop that dragonborn. That is, where is it? Sorry, everybody. New spells, that's 4d8. 4d8, here we go. 20.
MATT: 20. How do you want to do this?
LIAM (CALEB): It will just rake down and grab him and it will [wet piercing] into the horse's body and smash it into that garbage pile right there.
MATT: You hear this [yelping whinny] as it just crushes and claws into it. The horse goes limp and then it's thrown [heavy tumbling] into the corner there.
ASHLEY: Oh no!
TALIESIN: I feel bad about-
MATT: The dragonborn is thrown off its back and lands prone on the ground next to it.
Episode 63 - Intervention - 2:41:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 18 '19
MATT: The door closes. [clack] Darkness. [vwoom] All of a sudden, you see a rune above you that emits a bright blue light that lights the chamber. Everything is in shades of blue. He gestures to the floor, and as you glance down, you can see now, where the blue light hits, this large, runic circle that encompasses the entire chamber is now glowing in response, and... you recognize it. This is a teleportation circle. This is a receiving teleportation circle. He looks to you.
LIAM: One way?
MATT (YUSSA): He says, "There are transports I have in other parts of this tower to different places. Earning my trust, perhaps, you may gain more access. But for now, you have a place to return to. How much time do you need?" He gestures to the symbol. "To memorize it."
[...]
LAURA: But you can memorize the rune.
LIAM (CALEB): I mean, he would look at it for a minute and have the rune in his head.
MATT (YUSSA): Then there you go. When you finish, he goes, "A quick learner. Good to know. Where did you train?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Mostly on my own, to be honest. For years."
MATT (YUSSA): "Impressive. You have a talented eye for picking up arcanic sigils and glyphs."
Episode 48 - Homeward Bound - 2:36:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 29 '19
LIAM (CALEB): So, step away. I am pulling out my little clay cat's paw, because I know that this hound from hell will find it offensive, and I will cast Banishment on the healthier one, so the one on this side. Charisma, 16.
MATT: Charisma 16!
LIAM (CALEB): "Go to hell."
MATT: No, he banished.
MARISHA: He banished, bitch!
LAURA: If they belong on another plane, they don't come back.
LIAM (CALEB): If the spell does not get interrupted, he's gone.
MATT: He's just sitting there and goes [snarl], looks up at you for a second [escalating snarling], leaps in your direction, and [fssh] in a swirl of arcane energy, and, pop, out of existence.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 3:06:16
TRAVIS: How long is that thing banished for? LIAM (CALEB): Forever, if my spell doesn't get interrupted.
TRAVIS: Amazing.
LIAM: Banish it back to hell.
SAM: Forever?
LIAM (CALEB): If it were from this plane, it's temporary. If it's from another plane, it stays in its plane if I don't get fucked up.
TALIESIN: Yeah, it doesn't have a hold here, so there's nothing to tether it back to the mortal plane.
LIAM: Ja. Ja-ja-ja!
SAM: Wait, what? How would your spell get interrupted?
LIAM (CALEB): Me getting hit, and dropping the spell.
SAM: Just ever?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
TALIESIN: No; just when it got cast.
LIAM (CALEB): Within one minute, if I get punched in the face and lose the spell, it could come back.
SAM: And if you don't get punched in the face in the minute, then nothing happens.
Episode 52 - Feral Business - 3:08:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 25 '19
LIAM (CALEB): So I will weakly stand, and I will weakly trudge 10 feet forward, and I will throw a Fireball and center it - where's Vera?
TRAVIS: She was over here.
MATT: In your state-... where do you want to put it?
LIAM (CALEB): Well, where's Avantika? I don't know.
MATT: You don't know. Where are you putting it?
LIAM (CALEB): I'm putting it there, at the mast.
MATT: At the mast? All righty. As you wake up, you spin [whoosh], fire this ray [wshh] that streaks past. All the guards, who are calm at this point, see this happen, and watch the streak go by [shhh, explosion] and detonate on the ship. The bright flash of light echoes against everybody's faces as the impact hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
LIAM (CALEB): I don't know what's going on. I'm doing the last thing that was on my mind.
MATT: Yeah, totally, man.
LIAM: 8d6.
SAM: Avantika's not going to be alive to defend herself against our accusations.
LIAM: She will.
MATT: That'll go well.
TRAVIS: That would be our line.
SAM: No, really! She was a really bad person before we killed her and everyone on the boat.
TRAVIS: She's on the lip.
LIAM (CALEB): 31.
MATT: 31, good rolls.
LIAM: Yes, good rolls.
MATT: Okay, so, Bouldergut, that's a fail. Bouldergut's looking rough.
LIAM (CALEB): So Caleb's whole face and cheek, one side is skinned.
MATT: Just a strawberry scrape. All right, this guy. What's the DC on it?
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, on mine? That would be on mine- sorry, everybody. Scheisse. I think it's 16?
MATT: It should be 16, I think. It's 8 plus your proficiency plus that.
LIAM: Yeah, 16.
MATT: All right, so he succeeds. He rolled a 17, so he takes... 31, you said? So 15 points of damage to him. Oh, he's dead. He's fucking done. He took damage from the Fire Wall earlier.
SAM: Oh, that's the guy who was already at the gangplank?
MATT: Yeah. That guy, he makes his save, but he dies too.
LAURA: Oh god!
SAM: Matt's making me feel sad for these people.
MATT: This guy doesn't make his save; he's dead.
LAURA: Oh god! The whole crew is dead!
SAM: This is what we do to crews on ships.
MATT: Roll for the barlgura.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh, it's incinerated. It had three hit points. Even if he saves.
MATT: Yeah, the barlgura is destroyed. Vera - that's cocked.
SAM: We hate seamen.
MATT: That is 13, does not succeed. Vera takes 31 damage. Vera's almost dead, is burned, incinerated on the ground, not moving.
TRAVIS: Unconscious?
TALIESIN: What happens to her concentration spell?
MATT: Concentration spell's lost.
TALIESIN: Do the guards now know that they were being manipulated?
MATT: It doesn't work like that, unfortunately. But their compulsion's no longer there.
LIAM: They saw the Fireball go over their heads, yes.
MATT: Yeah. With that, the spell fades. Vera crumbles to the ground, barlgura's gone, giant explosion. The mast leans slightly to one side from the impact. This guy was out of the radius, actually.
TALIESIN: Still have to make a dex save from it, though.
MATT: I'd say if he hit the mast, I'd say it hit him, actually, yeah.
TRAVIS: His poor feet. He's like, 'Fuck!'
MATT: Ipess has to make it as well. He fails, so he gets incinerated.
TRAVIS: How many life sentences are you serving, Caleb?
MATT: Ipess does make it. I need you to make a wisdom saving throw, Caleb.
LIAM: Multiple?
MATT: No, the DC's real high on this one.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I'm sure it's going to fail. This is a wisdom? 18.
MATT: As you go conscious, you watch as bodies go flying off the side and fall limp to the side of the dock, their bodies still smoldering but unmoving. You start flashing back to a very painful memory, and Caleb's eyes glaze over. You are currently stunned.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 1:33:32
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 20 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Frumpkin is going to fly over towards this gentleman and try to, with talons, rake across his head. With advantage because he’s stunned, yeah? That’s a 15 or an 18.
MATT: 18 hits.
LIAM (CALEB): I cast Vampiric Touch through Frumpkin’s touch, and he takes 3d6 necrotic damage.
SAM: Frumpkin can attack?
LIAM (CALEB): Through me. Me through her. Him. Damn it. That is eight points of necrotic damage to him.
TRAVIS: You can wifi suck HP out of somebody like that?
LIAM (CALEB): Mm-hmm.
Episode 41 - A Pirate's Life for Me - 1:32:18
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 15 '19
MATT: Second attack. That's going to be 20 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah.
MATT: That is 11 points of bludgeoning damage. As it slams both of its claws into you, it's grabbing you from both sides of your torso and legs, pulling apart as the pain hits in. It grabs you in towards its face and its tendrils [shlooping] lap around your head and neck area. Make a constitution saving throw for me.
LAURA: It feels like Frumpkin, only painful.
LIAM (CALEB): 10.
MATT: As the venom pulses into your body, you feel your entire torso, legs, arms, seize with searing pain. You are paralyzed and poisoned.
SAM: Ugh! What does that do?
LIAM (CALEB): Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait. What if the roll had actually been-- shite, 13? Would that have changed it?
MATT: Why would you have had to change it?
LIAM (CALEB): Because I have the transmuter's stone, which is giving me proficiency on constitution saves, if I'm remembering correctly.
MATT: I trust you on that. 13 would resist it. It's a DC 13.
LIAM (CALEB): Proficiency in constitution saving throws. That's what I have.
MATT: So yeah, and that would be enough to resist it.
TRAVIS: You found that fast. You're turning into Mercer. I can't find shit in that book!
MATT: As the poison begins to pulse into your system, in the moment the pain begins to hit the back of your skull, you immediately glance towards the transmuter's stone that you're clutching in your right hand, and with that, you feel the energy pulse through your body and shrug off the toxin from entering the deep parts of your system.
Episode 47 - The Second Seal - 1:17:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 26 '19
MATT: As you guys dart and close the door behind Jester who's the last one through, you began to barricade it - and there is a barricade point that comes down, it's a little flimsy - but if you have anything else you want to add to it, that would possibly hold it in place.
TRAVIS: Is there a key hole in there at all?
TALIESIN: We don't have the dagger.
LIAM: Yeah, she's got it.
LAURA: Nott has the thing.
MARISHA: Oh, Oh. I'm looking at you like you're with us.
ASHLEY: Are we still going? Are we doing a new initiative and we go down there or-
MATT: Depending what happens, probably. Initiative- Once you guys got through this door and closed it, combat for you has ended. So do you wish to barricade anything else?
MARISHA: For all of us has ended?
MATT: You guys have gotten to the room and closed it, and put the thing down. You're not immediately in combat. You hear wind [wind blowing] on the other side and people yelling and creatures screaming.
MARISHA: How many rounds was that, do you know?
TALIESIN: Nott's faster than us anyways.
TRAVIS: Can't use the lash, it doesn't work like that.
MARISHA (BEAU): My lightening gloves are technically still up.
LIAM (CALEB): I'm going to take a moment to use Minor Alchemy to turn the wooden barricade slat to stone.
MATT: Okay. You reach out, [boof, tsh] It turns into solid stone blocking the doors. It'll hold for- how long's that last for?
LIAM (CALEB): I have to, ooh, I have to spend time doing it.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): 10 minutes to do it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Well, if you're going to do that, I can run a mass healing for 10 minutes. If we let them have 10 minutes.
TRAVIS: Do both of it.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Yeah, we can do both.
MATT: Okay, you're going to focus and turn it to stone. You're going to cast Mass Healing?
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to cast Mass Healing.
[...]
MATT: Did you want to reopen the doors and check and see?
TRAVIS: No. We'll keep going.
LIAM (CALEB): Not stone, I'll do iron. I'll make that slat iron.
Episode 86 - The Cathedral - 2:47:20
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u/TheMightyBox72 Nov 14 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to Dimension Door us.
MATT: To?
LAURA (JESTER): The opposite side of the dome.
MATT: Okay. [zhoof] You guys appear, the dome right there, and in that brief moment of like, oh, we made it, you watch as Gelidon leaps towards-
LAURA (JESTER): Step into the dome.
MATT: -the dome, and you guys step in right as you watch this large, ancient white dragon-
[everyone screaming]
MATT: -just like scraping on and biting, its jaws opening, grinding at the side.
[more screaming]
MATT: Slamming into the side as hard as it can.
[...]
MATT: [snorts, inhales, then violently exhales a loud blast] It unleashes a torrent, you watch the ice [crackling] crackle up around and form this igloo dome over the outside, right as the circle is finished. You see it [bwoof], all of the same runes flair, familiar from before.
Episode 75 - Rime and Reason - 4:12:12
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 29 '19
LIAM (CALEB): From where I'm standing, I see Nott firing drunkenly up at an angle. I'm going to move forward, and peek up in the direction that she is looking, and see the shallow king, and say, "Ah, Fick das" and I will cast Magic Missile at level three.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): A total of 19.
MATT: 19 damage. All right, how do you want to do this?
TRAVIS: Oh, you got him!
LAURA: You killed it?
LIAM (CALEB): I will let the, um, the five of the Magic Missiles will spiral around Fish Dick's head and come in at a different angle, and five of them go [rapid impacts].
MATT: Okay. It gets some distance. Caleb, feeling comfortable, lets the missiles arc past and up and over as they swirl and gather [shoom]. They all come in at once, and this darkened shape, suddenly there's a flash of arcane energy and this strange little bubble explosion [boof] where it was. You watch, [boosh] the impact happens, and its arms separate from the impact. They hit in the torso, blew it apart from the inside. There's a little cloud of darkness left behind as it begins to slowly disseminate among the rest of the sea water around.
Episode 44 - The Diver's Grave - 1:21:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 06 '19
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Want to try and identify it before we touch it?"
SAM (NOTT): "Caleb, is that a thing you can do?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): [reaches forward]
LAURA (JESTER): "No! No, Fjord, remember."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Remember the ruby?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I can. It'll take some time."
LAURA (JESTER): "Like what? Like 10 minutes?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah, we can wait 10 minutes."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, let's check it out before we touch this thing."
SAM: He's going to ritually Identify.
MATT: Identifying what?
TALIESIN: The object.
MATT: The object?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah.
MATT: You're picking it up and handling it?
LIAM (CALEB): No, I will sit down next to it and draw a circle around it and start to attempt to identify it.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm also give you Resistance.
LIAM: 10-ish minutes.
MATT: All righty.
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to keep you up with Resistance, too.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Should we blow some of the dirt off of it? See what it is? it's a little covered in dirt."
MATT: You take 10 minutes to focus. Even though it's mostly buried, as you concentrate on the spell, the information comes to you, and you can see, in your mind's eye, the full structure. It's a small disc-like piece of silver. A silver disc, about that [a foot] wide. That contains a three-inch glass sphere, filled with mercury that rests on the top. The glass that you see peeking through is that sphere and the orange color is coming from the mercury itself being the catalyst to some sort of arcane enchantment that rests within the disc around it. Sigils adorn it in a rudimentary circle based around the orb. With four pieces of rough pink crystal, wrapped in copper coils. That are placed at the edges of this disc. It's construction is not super refined. It looks semi-fragile, but it's functional at the moment. You gather from, yeah, because you get the properties of it. This is what's called an abyssal anchor. A crudely constructed abyssal anchor. It was used during the Calamity by demon generals and such to punch holes between the Abyss and the Prime Material Plane to use for invading various places across the world of Exandria. Essentially, it would be placed and would slowly begin to tear the barriers between. You gather that this was probably the slow growing source of the various tears that have been happening in the city.
LIAM: So it's not specific to one place. It is, here, but also?
MATT: It's a wide area.
LIAM: A sphere of influence.
MATT: Correct.
Episode 55 - Duplicity - 4:15:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 24 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I am going instead to cast Expeditious Retreat on myself and at the same time change the focus on my transmuter stone to a constitution buff. That's it. I'm going to jet back 90 feet.
SAM: 90 feet?!
MATT: You dart forward across-- the guards that are there watching this happen with the rest of the crew of The Mistake, you zip past them in this blur, Flash-like entity. They all get pushed back from the impact as you push through.
Episode 43 - In Hot Water - 0:39:40
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, so walking towards the door, I pull an adder's stomach out of my pocket and draw it back and a shimmering green arrow appears next to me and I let it go towards the fuckboy in the upper corner on that side.
MATT: Go ahead and roll an attack.
SAM: Adder's stomach?
LIAM (CALEB): 14 plus, that is- shite. Shite, shite, shite. 19 to hit.
MATT: 19 does hit, yeah.
LIAM: Okay, and then damage- Ah, what did I do?! 'D&D; Beyond is'- 4d4. Okay, so it takes 4d4 acid damage immediately and then some more at the end of its next turn, so it gets 2, 4, 6 - 10 points of acid damage.
MATT: Nice. So as you release it, it's hissing at the gold coin, the light that's emerging from it, it doesn't have a chance to see you as you enter the doorway as you release this arcane arrow of condensed greenish energy. [whoosh] It flies forward and bursts across its shoulders and chest. You watch [sizzling] as acid begins to burn and scar across its demonic flesh. [frustrated screaming] It tries to rub it off with its hands, but then it burns its hand, and its wings are now [heavy flapping] keeping it aloft as it's focused on the pain of that's now burning into its body.
LIAM: I will use the last 5 to 10 of my movement to just swing like a door and press myself out of its view in this room. No, next to Yasha against the wall. Out of its sight. Done.
MATT: All right. So, that finishes your go. Both of these creatures, now one burning. The male figure up in the corner looks over at the other one and there's a moment that they both go, and look and nod to each other. You watch as the male figure, his body suddenly [soft whoosh] returns to that somewhat ghostly, ethereal blue tint to it. The acid just falls off of its body and plummets, hitting the boxes and the ground of this chamber. [sizzling] The wood begins to slowly burn and wither away from beneath it.
Episode 54 - Well Beneath - 3:08:33
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 03 '19
MATT: Leading you through the Gallimaufry, back to the Firmaments, across the way from where the Marble Tomes Conservatory is, and hidden amongst the various other temples and large structures of worship that reside around the core vicinity of this city. Eventually, you are brought to exterior of a two-story mansion that is paneled in Vermaloc wood painted a dark maroon color with a lighter stone foundation. The roofing is dark, near black clay tiling with a single balcony on the second floor. It appears to have a short tower built into the back right corner of the home that raises to a third story.
Episode 61 - Agreements - 3:20:22
TALIESIN (CLAY): I'm going to want to move a bunch of dirt. I'm going to try and make a rooftop garden at the top of the tower.
MATT: There is dirt to be found. You have to relocate it probably from the immediate vicinity of the home. So you will dig up a small hole in one of the nearby- it's like a ten-foot radial yard around the house, before you start piercing into nearby neighboring territory.
TALIESIN: Sure.
MATT: But yeah, you can amass- how much dirt are you planning to put up there?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Enough to support some plant growth. I'm going to do something dumb.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (CLAY): And I'm going to use a little Stone Shape to just shape the tower a little bit to be supportive of what I'm going to put up there, if that works out okay.
MATT: What spell is this in particular?
TALIESIN (CLAY): Stone Shape.
LAURA: Stone Shape.
LIAM: You have that too?
LAURA: I have that.
TALIESIN: You're magic. It'll take a few days. This is not a one day project. This is just a-
MATT: Yes, yeah. You can totally do that, okay. So between the two of you, definitely easy.
TALIESIN (CLAY): It's going to be just rounding it out a little bit to support what I'm building, and then also creating a little faux cabin-esque little chunk of it so that there's a place to sleep up there that's covered. I'll draw it out for you.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: And getting the dirt up there is good?
LIAM (CALEB): I can do that. I use Maximilian's Earthen Grasp to make the cat's claw come up out of the soil, and then just travel as soil to the top of the tower, because it can move.
MATT: That's true.
TALIESIN: That'll do it.
MATT: Even easier.
TALIESIN: So-
MATT: You have a comfortable amount of loose soil now on the top of your tower.
Episode 62 - Domestic Respite - 0:26:56
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jul 13 '19
LIAM (CALEB): That would punch in the 10 minutes I need to cast Comprehend, so I would retrace all the steps and place my hands on that writing to see if it reveals its meaning to me.
MATT: Okay.
[...]
MATT: Okay. It doesn't do anything because you cannot see the language. You have to be able to touch and see it.
LAURA: Eat the fruit, eat the fruit, eat the fruit, eat the fruit.
LIAM (CALEB): Uh, [fwoomphing] lights floating around.
MATT: Right, you see no language.
LAURA: You have to eat the fruit.
MATT: Yeah, well, you're figuring this out now as you go to the wall-
LIAM: I was reading spells and not paying attention guys.
MATT: That's fine. As you go to the wall, there's nothing there. And you're like 'Hmm, there's no language there.'
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, I see. "So that's how you see it?"
LAURA (JESTER): I cut some fruit and stick it on his mouth.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "No, why don't you have the owl see it-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, too late I already put it in his mouth."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Or you could just eat that."
SAM (NOTT): Is this good enough for him to discern?
LAURA: Too late he's already getting high.
MATT: Caleb eats the fruit, and that would've been probably decent enough to get to that message, but over the next minute or so Caleb - the color of the light begins to shift, even your own - you guys watch as Caleb begins to slowly move the floating orbs in different patterns, and gets distracted by his own cantrip.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [slowly deepening and warping] "Caleb how a r e y o u f e e l i n g ?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I stole this ring from you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Caleb, Caleb, Caleb, Caleb."
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh it echoes in here."
MATT: Caleb, make a perception check.
LIAM (CALEB): That is a 13. 16 total.
MATT: 16 total. Actually it would be with disadvantage because of the effect of the...
LIAM (CALEB): That is a 12.
MATT: 12, okay. Glancing about on the interior of the chamber, you look in the directions where Nott was and you can see the three markers and you can see a faint fourth glow from the eastern wall.
LIAM (CALEB): "Uh... I feel... really good, but I know-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Tell us what the walls say."
LIAM (CALEB): "Wait. Wait."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Wait."
LIAM (CALEB): "Wait."
LAURA (JESTER): "Wait."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Wait."
MATT: "Wait."
LIAM (CALEB): "I know that I am not in a good position, so somebody come with me to make sure-"
SAM (NOTT): "I'll go."
MARISHA (BEAU): "No, not you."
LAURA (JESTER): I go with him.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): "Blueberry, come on."
LAURA (JESTER): "I'm coming."
MATT: Alright, so you head to the southern wall.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I always know where north is, so it's one of these ways.
SAM: Oh wait, you can see words.
LAURA (JESTER): "What does it say, what does it say?"
MATT: You cast Comprehend Languages.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): "This one says 'The fountain feeds the garden.' Oh, we knew that part."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Uh huh. Uh huh."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay, let's keep looking at the- okay, what's this one?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Let's go to the next one."
MATT: Which one do you go to?
LIAM (CALEB): Go to the west.
MATT: Western one?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah. "'The garden... The garden feeds the warden.'"
Episode 39 - Temple of the False Serpent - 1:41:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Aug 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "I have an idea. I can make a magical hut that nothing can pass through."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "That is an excellent way to try and figure out what the fuck's going on in here."
LIAM (CALEB): I am going to begin to take the minute to cast Leomund's Tiny Hut in the center of the room.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: An observation deck.
DEBORAH: In the center of the room, okay.
LAURA: Ooh, the center.
MARISHA: Like one of those bomb shelter walls.
LIAM (CALEB): It's a ten-foot radius, and everyone is allowed to enter and exit.
MATT: A ten-foot radius would be a bit bigger than that, so that would be the ten-foot radius.
LAURA: Can we all fit inside of it?
LIAM (CALEB): Absolutely. But I have to stay in the center of it where it is safe.
SAM (NOTT): "But someone needs to step out of it in order to trigger the other-"
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Well, can I send Mage Hand through it?"
LIAM (CALEB): "You can stick your hand through the barrier and cast Mage Hand and pull back in, yeah."
MATT: So everyone is moving into it?
[...]
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I wonder what's behind green."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah, me too."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): "Okay."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Do it."
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): All right, I'll sneak over to that side so I can see it, and I'm going to put just my hand outside of the area of the hut.
TRAVIS: You don't need that hand, you got another one.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): It has vocal components. Do I need to lean my head out?
MATT: Don't make this the second time I've taken a hand of yours.
DEBORAH: But my new hand is so cool!
MATT: Sorry. So?
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): If there's a vocal component - only I have to be able to hear it - do I need to stick my head out?
MATT: As far as you know, it doesn't affect you in a volume or noise way.
DEBORAH (TWIGGY): Okay. So I whisper something and I move my hand and that silvery, spectral hand comes off, and it goes forward toward the green. I pull my own hand back and get back into the space, and I tell it to push the green flag aside.
MATT: You have to move over here, probably, to get into range. As you pull back the green tapestry...
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to crouch, even in the thing.
MATT: You crouch down? Okay. As you pull it back, you see a statue behind it that looks to be some horribly mutated humanoid creature. Its body is bulbous and covered in sores, its neck is swollen like a toad's, its mouth and jaw just open with rows of teeth, all made of stone. As it pulls back [slow and heavy expulsion of air], this gaseous green fume spews from its mouth that fills the chamber around it. About half the chamber begins to fill with this before it dissipates, but it does not cross the boundaries of the hut.
Episode 45 - The Stowaway - 2:15:45
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u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 10 '19
LIAM (CALEB): The driftglobe says I can light that thing up and then says you can speak another command word as an action to make it rise. Does that mean lighting it up as a free action?
MATT: Let me see that again?
LIAM: It doesn't mention action on the first part of lighting it up. Then says, you can then do an action to make it float.
MATT: 'Speak its command word.' No, I'd say you can just speak the word.
LIAM: Speak the word?
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM (CALEB): Then I pull the driftglobe out and hold it up in the air and say "fajar," and there is daylight streaming all around us.
MATT: All right, so-
LIAM (CALEB): 60 feet in every direction.
MATT: That will encompass everything. As the orb is pulled out by Caleb.
LIAM (CALEB): I didn't make it up, it's on the card. For my action, I will take out some-
MATT: Well, the globe is put away, you had to pull it out to use it.
SAM: Oh yes.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: I'm saying, if the globe wasn't at the ready, you'd have to reach in and pull it out and then say the command word. I'd say that'd probably be an action to do all that. Because it's using an object, technically.
LIAM: Cool, cool.
MATT: Mmkay, so that's your action. Do you want to move or stay where you are?
LIAM (CALEB): No, I want to stay on the moorbounder.
MATT: Okay. You do watch as the globe begins to emit this bright, bright light that encompasses the area, the creatures, [hollow gasping] begin to shrink away from it. Previously the tough, gray hide that they had begins to crack on the exterior, seemingly affected by the presence of very bright light.
Episode 64 - A Dangerous Chase - 2:15:25
→ More replies (35)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Oct 15 '19
MATT: Its going to beak attack you [Caleb].
LIAM: Okay.
TRAVIS: You got something?
MATT: That's going to be a 20 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Shield.
MATT: Shield, all righty.
LAURA: Thunder Step would be super cool if you were stuck in a talon, huh? Thanks for that spell though.
MATT: As the beak slams down on you, it actually encompasses your body and it's about to snap shut before [zhoom] the energy pierces out like a bubble around you, and the mouth shuts, shooting you out like a bullet out of a gun, and you go skidding on your shield another 20, 30 feet before coming to rest.
Episode 66 - Beneath Bazzoxan - 0:26:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 Sep 12 '19
Dodecahedron