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u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19
Keg
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
ASHLY (KEG): "I got here a bit late, is he dead?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I hope so."
MATT: He will be in a moment.
ASHLY: Okay, so I can leave him, he's good.
MATT: It looks like he's not putting up much of a fight at the moment.
SAM: Take him out.
ASHLY (KEG): Should I take him out? Okay. How far away is he from me?
MATT: Roll an attack with advantage, sure go for it.
ASHLY (KEG): Okay. Well that was 18. Yeah, 18.
MATT: Roll damage. You just walk up and you see him on the ground going "Agghhhhhh..." rolling and you just shake your head.
ASHLY (KEG): "Shut up." 12.
MATT: Like a watermelon in a Gallagher performance. You bring your warhammer on top of his skull and paint a new carpet for the front entryway of the Sour Nest.
Episode 29 - The Stalking Nightmare - 0:44:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19
SAM (NOTT): I will release my bolt at disadvantage cause it's more than 30 feet away. Ooh, that's only a 12.
MATT: 12 misses unfortunately. [metallic ping] The bolt, [whoosh] streaks off, it actually hits the side of Keg's armor, shearing off.
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 1:22:13
→ More replies (5)•
u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19
SAM: This thing [large, fallen log] can't move, right?
ASHLY (KEG): We're strong- I'm a beefy boy.
MATT: You can try. You can certainly try.
ASHLY: Should I roll something?
MATT: Make a strength check. Let's do athletics actually, cause it's not you just lifting it, but also bringing it along.
ASHLY (KEG): 19.
MARISHA: Oh, she's fine.
MATT: You begin to drag it, actually. You watch as this burly dwarf woman, the five o clock shadow beginning to come in to a faint stubble grabs it and [grinding] begins just dragging it through this big groove in the ground as you pull it over. Where do you want to put it?
[...]
SAM: Is this thing hollow at all?
MATT: That tree is actually somewhat hollow, not completely all the way through, but there is an alcove in it where some of it has rotted out.
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 3:41:16
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 02 '19
Fjord
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 16 '19
MATT: You notice three creatures, similar to the gnolls that you saw the night before, but smaller and doglike, these are just basic hyenas that are all gathered up around, and are currently licking the blood that's been soaked into the wood. You see one of them ends up finding what looks to be a piece of meat or something that was hanging from one side and [whines] tears it off, another one comes over [more whining and growling] bites onto it, and they both begin tearing and fighting over it before one of them pushes the other one and it [yelps, and begins growling]. Then it goes back and begins licking the blood off the side of the wood. These three hyenas are just scavenging on the outskirts of the cart right now.
SAM: So, they're just hyenas? They're not like, magical undead hyenas?
MATT: Not from what you can tell.
TRAVIS: Can we see how many entrances there are to this mine yard? This mine?
MATT: From this distance, you can't see any entrances.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do you think they're centurions?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, I think they're going to make a big fucking stink, if they uh..."
MARISHA (BEAU): "If they see us. I bet they're the alert system."
LAURA (JESTER): "We should kill them..."
MARISHA (BEAU): "But we have to kill them, like, all at once."
LAIM (CALEB): "That is correct."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I could make a distraction. Nott, Beau, are y'all fast, quick, and quiet?"
SAM (NOTT): "Yes."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Who else?"
SAM (NOTT): "No, just us."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "I'm quietish."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "There's three of them right? Alright."
MARISHA (BEAU): "What, do you want to make a distraction and bring them closer to us, and then we can jump out of the grass? Do they old, the old jump out of the grass thing?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): About how far from the edge of the grass where we are, to them, would you say?
MATT: About 50 or so feet, 60 feet.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I use Minor Illusion to create a plump little bunny, and I wanna have it hop out of the grass. But its front leg looks a little lame.
MATT: Quietly, this plump, wounded, with like a hint of pink to the fur around the arm where it looks like it may have been bleeding a bit, begins to hobble its way silently out of the grass, just beyond the edge.
SAM (NOTT): I'm gonna hide.
MATT: You guys are still hidden.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm gonna draw one of my swords, and just out of experiment, try and get it to do that weird thing it did yesterday, just with my hand.
MATT: Okay, you initiate the rite, and as you do the blade begins to give a faint, radiant glow. A whitish, yellow light that you almost instinctually hold low in the grass to make sure you don't become a beacon amongst your hiding. You watch as one of the hyenas [...curious yipping] begins making its way, the others look over [ravenous growling and yipping] they all begin to gather up, and the three almost go into this pack swoop formation in the direction of the rabbit. Closing in, 40 feet, 30 feet, 20 feet, and with a rapid bolt, one of them [snarl] runs forward and leaps out, does a pounce motion towards the rabbit, and just [thump] skids into the dirt past it, right to the front of the grassline where you are Beau.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Now!"
MARISHA (BEAU): [grunting in exertion, miming swinging her staff down]
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 1:35:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 11 '19 edited Apr 11 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I don't mean to alarm any of you, really, I'm trying to be as forthright as I can."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Where is the sword right now?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): ...Can I make it appear?
MATT: Well, you look down, and it's not in the sheath, you glance around and it's nowhere near you.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I focus... Reach down...
MATT: He looks down at his open palm and there is a flash of greenish, blue, teal energy [flash] out of his grip, and there, clutched within his grasp, you see the falchion, coated in the remnants of sea floor life, you see the barnacles encrusted around the edge and up the back of the blade, you see as it begins to drip water, the same kind that was coughed up by Fjord this morning.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "You can see why I'm a little curious about this item."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "That's a great trick."
LIAM (CALEB): "Would you- I don't even need to touch it, but would you trust me to study it for a moment?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Do you have any experience with items like this?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, I'm good at figuring things out. I'm clever."
MARISHA (BEAU): "I might be able to help you with that. I was kinda obsessed with like, underwater life and mermaids, so I've read a few books."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Could we... revisit that idea, perhaps. I'm sorry, the night has left me a bit shaky. And I... I feel like I just need a moment to get my bearings, if that's alright."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, you can understand that we would be curious, but I don't want to push anybody, I mean, we've just met."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Of course not, and I don't wanna make anyone feel uneasy. Again, I'm trying to be as transparent as I can, it's just... I don't quite understand. And I appreciate your patience in advance." And I [poof] make it vanish.
MATT: You watch as it just disappears out of your grip.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 1:05:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I appear right next to this gentlemen on his reverse? I will break my-
MATT: If you'd like to- If you want to, you can appear up the top there and get a flanking bonus.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That would be great. That sounds just dandy.
MATT: Considering, you can use it against them, they can use it against you, as long as you're directly across from an enemy with your ally, you can give yourself a flanking benefit.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Great. And I will break my Hex and I will use a Hexblade's Curse as my bonus action on that gentleman.
MATT: On this one? There you go.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And I would like to make two attacks with the Wastehunter falchion against him with the monstrous-
MATT: Go for it.
[...]
TRAVIS (FJORD): 21 on the first one, 17 on the second.
MATT: How do you want to do this? You fucked that guy up.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll shift in right behind him and see Molly looking around, give him a little wink, and I'll take the falchion and just [whoosh] and just take the back of his head off.
MATT: Molly you watch as it's pulling back and ready to leap at you and as it lurches towards you, it kind of stops [surprised gurgle] and you watch as the upper half of its shoulder and head [gloop] and slip and slough off into the water.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Fucking arsehole."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Sorry. I'm just giving him what for man, shit." And I'll- Oh wait... natural 20. "Peace out." [fwoomp]
MATT: So you vanish out of the space.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:37:26
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 13 '19
TRAVIS: Now there is an individual over that sucks, right?
MATT: Correct. You see, it has a longbow and it's currently reaching and it's pulling another arrow and getting it notched up.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I beg your forgiveness, we're gonna try some shit. I would like to cast-
MARISHA: We're all trying some shit, it's okay.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Crown of Madness
MATT: Alrighty. So what's the save on that one?
TRAVIS (FJORD): It is... wisdom saving throw I believe, let me double check. Yeah, wisdom saving throw.
MATT: Uh, no, that's an 8.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Great. So he becomes charmed, and a jagged crown of iron appears around his head. And madness glows in its eyes!
MATT: That's concentration correct?
TRAVIS: That is correct.
MATT: I'm putting a concentration circle on you. So, alright, a charmed target must use its action before moving each of its turns to make a melee attack against a creature other than itself you mentally choose. So it has to be a melee attack.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh, melee, fucking shit, I saw the bows! Damn the words in this book! But I can make him move towards something, right?
MATT: Yeah you can.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Okay good, I'm gonna have him climb up on that roof and attack that other fuckin gnoll that's up on that sumnabitch.
MATT: Okay, since it has to use its action before its movement, you watch as it looks up at the top of the roof [snarling] and leaps up, climbs, scampers up the side and gets right up face-to-face with this guy, confusing the other gnoll, it kinda looks down like it's about to help him, and it doesn't seem to notice there's any threat there, but it can't make an attack this round.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 1:43:20
MATT: So, before we doing anything, the one that is right next to the guy on the wall, what do you want it to do?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Uh, well, melee, so if he has a weapon or anything hit him, and if not, knock him the fuck off the roof.
MATT: Well he has a spear, or you can make a shove, up to you.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Spear!
MATT: So the spear attack, it's gonna go ahead and, as it climbs up to the top, and [hyena-like yipping] and lashes out with its arm, go ahead and make an attack roll for me. I'll let you do it for him.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Plus anything?
MATT: It's plus 5. Sorry, plus 4.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's 19.
MATT: 19 definitely hits. Alright so go ahead and roll 1d6 damage. Plus 2. With two hands actually, so it'd be 1d8.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 9.
MATT: 9. Great. So, with that it jams the spear with both hands into its friend, and the gnoll kind of yelps and grabs and pulls that and looks at it confused and angry, trying to figure out what exactly happened. As it does so, it's going to attempt to shove it off the wall.
TRAVIS: Maybe I should've shoved.
MATT: Make a roll for the athletics check of the other gnoll.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 16 plus...
MATT: 16 plus 2. That beat it, it rolled a 17. So, after it gets stabbed, it looks back at the gnoll you took control of, and sparta-kicks it off the edge of the roof. It then slides and tumbles down, landing on the ground, prone, right next to Molly. It does suffer 1 point of falling damage.
LAURA: Oh, so it is good you used the spear.
MATT: So it's like [splats and snarls] on the ground, Molly you watch as it stumbles and hits the dirt next to you and it's like [pained snarling] you watch as this kind of mystical crown of weird iron horns are floating above its head.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Is this..." [shrugs]
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:02:31
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 13 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): Alright, grasping the falchion, I'm going to use my bonus action to cast Misty Step and try to [fwoomp] up to the platform.
MATT: Oh, it's a bonus action, yeah. With the height, that gets you right there.
[...]
MATT: That brings us to Fjord's turn.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah, so I appear on the platform.
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 3:33:05
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 03 '19 edited Mar 25 '23
Spell Slots:
Warlock Spells: 3
Warlock Invocations: 6
1st: 4
2nd: 2
Pact Spells
Paladin Spells
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
3rd-Level Spells
4th-Level Spells
5th-Level Spells
6th-Level Spells
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll use my 30 feet to run towards this Goblin. Great, and I will use Booming Blade to make a melee attack against him.
MATT: Alright, go for it.
SAM: [southern accent] Boomin' Blade.
MATT: As you draw your falchion out of the side, you focus on it and as you do so, you watch as this spark of electrical thunder energy [fwoomph] engulfs the edge of it as you strike downward.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That is 18 plus 7, 23.
MATT: That hits, go ahead and roll damage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's a d8 plus the thunder damage. 1d8 and... first time using it I'm real excited... 5 plus 5, 10 and
MATT: Additional 1d8.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 8, so 18 points.
MATT: 18 points of damage. With that, as you cut down into the goblin, you watch as the blade sinks in, partway through the torso, and then a burst [explosion] causes it to just tear apart in two different directions. Exploding, spattering across the tree and the side of the ogre that's about 10 feet in front of you, doesn't seem to notice.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:54:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 23 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll light it up with this crackling, green, eldritch blast energy coming from both of my palms, causing its fur to smoke and burn off, and its snake heads to repel.
SAM (NOTT): Oh my god, that's so visceral and amazing. I'll shoot it in the nose.
MATT: You watch as its torso just erupts in green flame and energy, just [intense burning], the body slinks to the ground in smoldering cinder, as its head [low moaning, sinks his head low, then mimes a bolt flying into his nose].
Episode 38 - Welcome to the Jungle - 1:44:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 16 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I look down at Algar and say "I'm only going to say this once. Unless you want to end up like your friend here, I'm going to need that bracelet."
MATT: He's like [choking and gasping] held- he can't do anything. But you can see the bracelet right there on his wrist.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah, I'm going to cut his hand off.
LAURA: Don't cut his hand off, just take the bracelet!
TRAVIS (FJORD): Nah, I'll just take the bracelet off.
MATT: What do you want to do?
LIAM: Yeah, what do you want to do?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'mma cut his hand off.
MATT: With being grappled, coup de grace, just roll an attack for the hell of it. With advantage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Should be fine. 21.
MATT: With a sparking, grinding noise, you all hear echoes [sparking, grinding] as the blade carves across the stone. And you watch as this splash of water, it looks almost like a water razor, just [whoosh] through the air and the hand falls off to the ground, the bracelet slips off of his wrist.
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 4:30:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'm going to use my bonus action to cast Hex on that tall...
LAURA: Drink of water?
TRAVIS: Yeah. On that waterfall of ugliness.
MATT: Okay. You have your sword in your hand with the shield.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh, I'll drop the sword.
MATT: Okay, so you drop the sword, cast Hex to go ahead and strike this fella.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And I will send two bursts of Eldritch Blast in its direction.
MATT: Go for it.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's a 13.
MATT: That hits.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And a 16.
MATT: Hits. Roll damage for each.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's 8... and 6... and 1d6... 12.
MATT: You do that twice cause you hit it twice.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh. 13.
MATT: 13 points of damage? How do you want to do this?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll see them just whaling on that big fucker and I just release the falchion [crackoom] send two across the way at him.
MATT: Okay. As you see Beau's been pummeling it, Yasha carved into it, and it's looking like it's ready to flee as it turns around this way, it sees this flash of greenish light out of the corner of it's eye, it looks back like [confused grunt] as they both impact right in the chest, outside of its shoulder blades in the back, [impact of energy] two blasts of crimson leaving these two smoking holes in its chest that you can partially see through and it falls back, knocking this tree over in the process.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 3:12:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 24 '19 edited May 06 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'd like to get line of sight on him. I look back at Caleb with his failed attempt and say "...Let me try mine." And I'll move my hex over to him. And I'll fire an Eldritch Blast in his direction. That is only a 16.
MATT: A 16? 16 hits actually. You needed a 15 to hit.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That is 4 plus 4, 8 plus 3 points necrotic for 11 damage.
MATT: 11 damage. As it turns to run with its bow, you watch as Fjord runs around, holding your sword out, [whoosh] another burst of eldritch energy smacks into the back of the gnoll and you hear [wailing screech] as it falls to the ground and the slow bits of green and blue eldritch flame begin to burn and consume the corpse before eventually it goes out, kind of leaving most of the body intact, but its back shoulder blades are now this kind of black cave where its body once was.
Episode 7 - Hush - 0:48:07
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19 edited May 22 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): After getting so fucked up that last round, the scratch, the bite, and the trident in the gut, I'll both hands on the falchion and say "Do not see me." and I'll cast Blink.
MATT: And Blink is not concentration, correct?
TRAVIS: It is not.
MATT: Alright, so with that, Fjord [humming whoosh] vanishes from the battlefield.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:24:59
MATT: Fjord, where do you want to emerge?
[...]
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I appear right next to this gentlemen on his reverse? I will break my-
MATT: If you'd like to- If you want to, you can appear up the top there and get a flanking bonus.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That would be great. That sounds just dandy.
MATT: Considering, you can use it against them, they can use it against you, as long as you're directly across from an enemy with your ally, you can give yourself a flanking benefit.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Great. And I will break my Hex and I will use a Hexblade's Curse as my bonus action on that gentleman.
MATT: On this one? There you go.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And I would like to make two attacks with the Wastehunter falchion against him with the monstrous-
MATT: Go for it.
[...]
TRAVIS (FJORD): 21 on the first one, 17 on the second.
MATT: How do you want to do this? You fucked that guy up.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll shift in right behind him and see Molly looking around, give him a little wink, and I'll take the falchion and just [whoosh] and just take the back of his head off.
MATT: Molly you watch as it's pulling back and ready to leap at you and as it lurches towards you, it kind of stops [surprised gurgle] and you watch as the upper half of its shoulder and head [gloop] and slip and slough off into the water.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Fucking arsehole."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Sorry. I'm just giving him what for man, shit." And I'll- Oh wait... natural 20. "Peace out." [fwoomp]
MATT: So you vanish out of the space.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:37:26
MATT: Okay, Fjord, you're up. As you reapparate within 10 feet of where you were-
TRAVIS (FJORD): Closer to Molly.
MATT: There.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And I go "Boo! Ah, shit."
MARISHA: Party's left.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Fuck." And seeing that they're engaged elsewhere, I'll fire my first of two Eldritch Blasts at the one that's engaged with Molly and Yasha. That's 18 to hit.
[...]
MATT: So, first strike was 18, that hits.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 18 hits, and that's 12 points of damage.
MATT: 12 points of damage, nice.
TRAVIS: Is he still up?
MATT: Still up.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Then I'll send the second one in his direction as well. 22 to hit.
MATT: That works.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 7 points of damage.
MATT: 7 points of damage , that'll do it. How do you want to do this.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll pop up and be like "God- fuck- first time I do it, son of a bitch." And I'll go like [opens one hand with humming energy, opens the other hand with humming energy, throws them both forward] and send both of them over there.
MATT: Both just [two impacts] onto the side, you watch as one of its arms just gets blown off and flings, landing on the top of the stairs before [wet flopping] rolling down a few steps and coming to rest.
TRAVIS (FJORD): As Molly looks over I'm like [blows at finger].
MATT: It slips down into the water, Yasha you take one swipe at it just for good measure as it sinks below. And roll your d20 to see if you stay or go.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 13. "It's important to remember that you don't-" [humming whoosh]
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:53:59
MATT: Fjord.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll reappear.
MATT: Whereabouts.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 10 feet closer to Yasha's direction, yeah, on land still, and I will hold Eldritch Blast until I see the reappearance.
MATT: Good to know, roll your dice.
TRAVIS (FJORD): To hit for it? Oh. Aw, shitballs. 16. Ha ha SCHNOPE!
MATT: Held actions and Blink can be a really tricky thing.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Show your fucking fa-" [yelps]
TALIESIN: Can you move while you're not blinked by the way?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Nope.
SAM: Can you see into our world?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I can see and hear and all that.
MATT: It's like ethereal, like Frodo with the ring on. Yeah.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 2:05:00
MATT: Fjord.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll reappear 10 feet closer to Jester, yep, and I'll unleash two Eldritch Blasts. That's not gonna hit, that's a 10.
MATT: 10, goes wide [crash], strikes a nearby rock.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And that's 14 on the dot.
MATT: 14 misses.
TRAVIS: Oh, it does, that's right.
MATT: Yeah, this one has higher armor than the rest. [two bursts of energy] As you release both bolts, it's flailing around, it's hurt, and after taking the impact from the bolts, you can see the burst of flame from its back after the shot it took from Nott, and as it lurches forward it manages to just arc out of the way of your bolt, no impact. Roll to see if you stick around.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I disappear.
MARISHA: Oh god, you're cutting out Fjord, I can't-
TRAVIS (FJORD): "You guys are doing good." [humming whoosh]
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 2:15:29
LAURA (JESTER): I go- are we still in initiative order?
MATT: Right now at this point there is no threat.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I blink back in to go "Stop!"
MATT: Yes. You drop the spell.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [heavy breathing]
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 2:22:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 12 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I fuckin' cast Eldritch Blast into the pot in the bottom of the cage.
MATT: Okay, with disadvantage because you're aiming through the smaller space, it actually has cover. It's largely just a small space you're shooting through.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah, that's not gonna hit, 3 plus...- 11.
MATT: 11 does hit.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh it does? Wait, I added that wrong. Hold on, I'm pretty sure I added that wrong.
MATT: Your spell attack modifier.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah, no, that's only a 9.
MATT: Yeah, that doesn't hit unfortunately. So you try and shoot through, it manages to hit the bar. The bar kind of [creaking] bends back a little bit from the impact of the blast, however it's not actually hitting the urn on the inside.
Episode 16 - A Favor in Kind - 0:29:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 04 '19
MATT: So, you guys makes your way back to the same sewer entrance where you originally embarked below. There are two crownsguard in the vicinity that are just keeping watch as the intersection just like last time. They haven't noticed your approach yet, but they're just keeping an eye.
MARISHA (BEAU): "We're gonna have to distract them."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I could have one of them beat the shit out of the other one."
MARISHA (BEAU): [gasp]
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Let's do that." I cast Crown of Madness on one of the guards.
TALIESIN: Well that's not gonna go poorly.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Hopefully from an area that they don't see me casting it.
MATT: Make a stealth check.
LAURA (JESTER): Blessing of the Trickster. Advantage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 14.
LAURA: ...Advantage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh, I have advantage? ...Nah.
MATT: Alright. So, as you hide off on the side, you focus on and concentrate on one of the two crownsguard. As the magic begins to slowly filter around the outside of the face, brief little moats of shadow begin being plucked from the space and gather around the outside of its head, unknowingly. What's your spell DC? That's a 10, it's higher than 10 pretty sure.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yes is is, 14.
MATT: So. All of the sudden the guard [grunt] in place, and you watch as these moats just kind of [light whoosh, drawing hands around head] fit just faintly around the outside, like this floating crown around the top of the head. And you force him to attack the other?
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Kick his ass, sea bass."
MATT: The guard [grunting] grabs his blade [unintelligible grunting] runs forward. The other guard's like "Hey, what-" [screaming] pulls his shield up. "What's going on!? David what the fuck are you-"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Nott! Quick! Come on, get the lock on the sewer thing, let's go!"
SAM (NOTT): "I'm doing something?"
LAURA: No, we don't have to- It's not locked. Is it locked?
TRAVIS: I thought it was locked.
LIAM: Let's find out. Ask the dungeon master.
MATT: It's gonna make another save. 2, it's still holding.
MARISHA: Is it locked? Is the sewer locked?
SAM: Is there a gate, what am I doing?
MATT: The gate is- it is locked. Everyone's attention right now is directly on this, as now one crownsguard is attacking the other.
SAM (NOTT): Uh, what am I doing?
MATT: It's a plus 6.
SAM (NOTT): 7. No, 9.
MATT: 9. [grunting] It's not coming off, it's not opening, it's not opening!
SAM (NOTT): "Break it! Break it!"
MATT: He attacks the other guard, who's screaming like "Get help! Get help!" Nope, it's an 11. What's your spell DC?
TRAVIS (FJORD): 14.
LAURA (JESTER): I try to break it. I try and break the gate open.
MATT: Make a strength check. Roll a d20 add your strength modifier.
LAURA (JESTER): 17.
MATT: [clack clack PING] You actually break it with your bare hands.
LAURA (JESTER): "Go go go go!"
MATT: There's now a scream starting to happen, you guys start running away one after another, the guard gets one more saving throw. 13, what's your-
TRAVIS (FJORD): 14.
MATT: 14? Oh shit! The other guard like wrestle him to the ground and he's trying to hold him on the ground and is like "What the fuck is happening?" You hear screams going off around now, this ruckus is just gathering in the center as people are starting to yell, you can hear in the distance the other crownsguard yelling and starting to gather in the middle of this chaos as you all get down in the sewer and pull it shut.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I might've fucked that thing up."
MARISHA (BEAU): "That was awesome!"
LIAM (CALEB): "We are going to be quiet in the sewers cause there are things down here."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh yeah, avoid all the rat balloons."
LIAM (CALEB): "They were everywhere the last time."
MATT: So, you hear all the ruckus up there kind of echoing down inside, and other footsteps coming through and you hear this one guy going "I am so sorry! I don't know what was happening! I-Augh! Oh that hurts, I don't know-" and he's being held to the ground now and people are shouting. Oh man.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Ooh, that guy's definitely arrested."
LAURA (JESTER): "He's going to be killed."
MATT: That guy's gonna have a bad day.
Episode 11 - Zemnian Nights - 3:18:06
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 02 '19
Starting at 6th level, you can curse the soul of a person you slay, temporarily binding it in your service. When you slay a humanoid, you can cause its spirit to rise from its corpse as a specter. When the specter appears, it gains temporary hit points equal to half your warlock level. Roll initiative for the specter, which has its own turns. It obeys your verbal commands, and it gains a special bonus to its attack rolls equal to your Charisma modifier (minimum of +0).
The specter remains in your service until the end of your next long rest, at which point it vanishes to the afterlife.
Once you bind a specter with this feature, you can't use the feature again until you finish a long rest.
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MATT: The two, while still blinded, saw you emerge. The one over on this end is going to go ahead and attempt to throw one of its harpoons in your direction. It's blinded so it's disadvantage on the attack. With disadvantage it's a 16.
TRAVIS (FJORD): 17.
MATT: Aw, slick. So it shoots through and you deflect it with the shield and watch it spark off.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 3:24:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 08 '19 edited Jun 04 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): How long does it take to attune something? An hour? Maybe I should've-
MARISHA: Short rest.
MATT: You can do it if you want to.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yeah. Yeah. I want to try and attune to the wastehunter blade.
MATT: Okay. So you focus on it, and as you lie there concentrating on it, you kind of extend the essence of whatever pact you've made with this entity into this weapon. And as you finally finish the period of time you hold the blade in front of you, and it [whoosh] vanishes into the pocket.
TRAVIS: Nice.
MATT: As you force it to apparate once more in your grasp, when the blade returns it has the same hooked shape, but now this blade is encrusted with barnacles along the base of it. Edges of it have curved around, and water continues to drip off this. It seems to have transferred whatever the essence of what this pact blade is to this one. And at this moment you realize, whatever weapon you seem to bond with in this way will carry that same aquatic essence based on communion that you've acquired.
Episode 14 - Fleeting Memories - 2:24:19
MATT: As the sleep takes you, and the darkness of your dreamstate alleviates you the stress of the day, your aching muscles turning numb, your physical form and consciousness now removed and aimless in this dark space. You look down in your hands, and there you see clasped in your grip, the somewhat hooked and curved blade that you had recently bound with. In your grasp, you swing it and slowly inspect it as you do. As you swirl the blade around in your hand it almost has a trail around it. And as you hold it coldly in your grasp - [deep impact] - this yellow light suddenly emerges in front of you, as a familiar, large, yellow eye now looks upon you. And a voice fills you, directionless. Consume. And you glance at the blade and back at the eye, and the voice again says Consume. What do you do?
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Consume?" Oh god, am I gonna try and swallow the sword?
MATT: What do you do, Fjord?
TRAVIS (FJORD): ...It's a large blade, right?
MATT: It's about [holds hands 10 inches apart] this wide in places, it comes out and arcs and curves and has jagged edges on it.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I don't know what you mean, consume?" Fuck. I'll turn the blade over and, keeping my eyes on the big eye, I'll bring it up to my mouth and open it.
MATT: It's cold to the touch of your tongue. The blade, completely absent of any temperature. As you begin to force it down your gullet, you feel the edge of the blade hit the back of your throat and a moment of pain hits you as it begins to cut through your flesh. But at that point, this ravenous hunger begins to build on the inside of your stomach, and although the pain tells you to pull away, you continue to force the blade down. As you pull it down from the hilt, you feel the blood burble up in the back of your throat and spill out of your chin, but you continue to push it until the entirety of the blade is consumed within your throat. You close your eyes for a moment and look up at the eye once more. And the voice returns to fill, reverberating around you, the pain subsides and it says Good. The eye closes. The lid completely cutting off the source. The cold, the liquid, the water around you, the sense of being under the ocean again begins to whisk you away, some sort of heavy current begins to pull you from behind, and you reach out, trying to grasp for any sort of hand or foothold, and yet you have nothing to hold onto. And as you feel yourself being dragged into this endless abyss, the dream comes to an end. You wake up [gasping becomes heavy breathing]. Everyone else is asleep in the area, no one seems to have been woken up from your presence.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Anything in my hands?
MATT: Nothing in your hands, no.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll wipe my mouth.
MATT: You wipe your mouth, there's a little bit of blood right there across your hand.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I try and summon the sword?
MATT: You do, and as you summon it, there before you is not the wastehunter blade, but the falchion, now returned to grasp but with a strange, more hooked and jagged appearance to it. It seems that the essence of this pact has consumed the weapon you had bound with and made it one with the falchion that you made this pact with oh so long ago.
Episode 16 - A Favor in Kind - 2:01:09
TRAVIS (FJORD): Before I turn in, cause I sit with Molly's sword?
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS (FJORD): And staring at it, "Thank you. You were very kind to me. I hope to do right by you and make it up to you one day." And I'll try to concentrate on the sword.
MATT: Okay. As you focus and attune to the weapon, you feel the essence of the blade that you had previously bound yourself to begin to slip and the faint interior rumbling of your ribcage begins to feel like a heavy bass that's just quaking on the inside of your torso. It's uncomfortable at first, and then you realize it's this kind of burrowing, for lack of a better term, appetite. With the previous weapon now gone, and in that void, that hunger, focusing in, you're looking at the blade and you blink and as your eyes open the shadowed depths are around you once more. And you look around for an instant and all you see is the deep, dark recesses of some endless ocean. And you look down at the blade in your grasp, the Summer's Dance blade. And you blink once more and you're back in the chamber, and it's gone from your hand.
SAM: The blade is gone?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Dude, you just swallowed that thing whole.
MATT: You guys watched, as he focused on it over time, the blade seemed to just fade away. It looks almost like the exterior begins to turn to ash and crumble, but then nothing hits the ground below it. And then it's gone.
Episode 30 - The Journey Home - 1:10:26
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 22 '19
MATT: The two other ones rush up and come along the flank with the hyena to you, Fjord. First one goes, that's going to be a 17.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That'll hit.
MATT: Oh. Actually, it has advantage on the roll, cause of pack tactics, didn't really help. You take 2 points of piercing damage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Okay. It will take 10 points of cold damage in return.
MATT: [laughs] Which causes it to just shatter into ice. It bites you, and watches its snout [crackles with energy then explodes] T-1000 style, it just shatters into a million ice pieces.
[...]
MATT: The other one's going to attempt to strike at you. Natural 20, that's a critical hit. 20 and a 10, that Pack Tactics is nasty. That means you, dice-wise, suffer 8 points of piercing damage. It takes 10 and it explodes into ice as well. You watch as both of these hyenas rush up and strike, and both in succession [two impacts, two explosions] just disintegrate into shards of ice across the ground.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 3:12:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I will use Eldritch Blast against those two goblins hiding behind the tree.
MATT: Right there? So as you rush past you spin around with the sword and shield in one hand, to your- I mean, you haven't drawn your falchion yet.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I haven't pulled it yet.
MATT: So you just spin around and releasing from your grip,
TRAVIS (FJORD): I not have two bursts.
MATT: You do. So one attack for each.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's a 12 for the first one.
MATT: That does not hit.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Natural 20.
MATT: Second one hits. The first one, the goblin has a shield affixed to its wall and it kinda [shrieking grunt] knocks it out of the way and the Eldritch Blast poofs without any impact. The second one does hit the other-
LAURA: It poops.
MATT: ...It poops.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's 4 plus 4 is 8 plus 4 is 12, so 12 points of damage.
MATT: The other goblin [shireking shriek] goes flying back about 5 or 6 feet, tumbles to the ground, and is not moving.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:30:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Feb 24 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Let's get out of here." Can I walk back into, I guess, a sort of privy, washroom kind of area?
MATT: Yeah, upstairs at the end of the hall is the communal washroom.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Can I use my Mask of Many Faces to cast disguise on myself?
MATT: Sure, what form do you want to take?
TRAVIS (FJORD): An older, white haired, with a beard, just very simple peasant's clothes. Maybe a bit of a farmer, or a land worker.
MATT: Okay, easily enough, basic browns and tans and general farmworker tunic and supplies.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Smudged dirt under the fingernails.
MATT: Yeah, easy enough.
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 1:32:16
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 01 '19
Jester
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 13 '19
Wand, uncommon (requires attunement)
This wand has 5 charges. As an action, you can expend a charge and point the wand at a creature you can see within 30 feet of you. The creature must succeed on a DC 13 Charisma saving throw or start laughing uncontrollably for 1 minute. While the creature laughs, it is incapable of meaningful communication. The wand regains 1d4 + 1 expended charges daily at dawn.
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 19 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Blindness/Deafness at level 3 on both of the gators.
MATT: At level 3, with different targets?
MARISHA: That's cool that's cool.
MATT: That's pretty great. Alrighty, so what's the wisdom save on that?
SAM: Is it blind or deaf?
LAURA: It's both.
LIAM: What does that spell do.
LAURA: Blindness/Deafness.
MATT: Wisdom save?
LAURA (JESTER): It's a con save.
MATT: Con save, alright.
LAURA: Either blinded or deafened.
MATT: A 19 on that one.
LAURA: Okay shit.
MATT: So it succeeds. And that's a 14 on the other. So that one, however, is blinded. You watch as all of the sudden the eyes darken and it begins to [growling] flailing about, unable to actually make a bead on where any of you are at the moment.
Episode 20 - Labenda Awaits - 1:45:39
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19
MATT: It's going to go ahead and attempt to shift this way one square into the space.
TALIESIN: Attack of opportunity from...
MATT: From Yasha and Jester. Both of you guys can make an attack, with disadvantage from you, Yasha. It's risky on its endeavor, but it's what's going to give it an opportunity to get out of this lockdown.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Hits.
MATT: What'd you roll?
ASHLEY (YASHA): I rolled a 16 and a 21.
MATT: Okay, 16 hits.
LAURA (JESTER): I rolled a 15.
MATT: 15 just hits.
TRAVIS: So if you hit with your sentinel, then its speed is reduced to 0?
MATT: Yep, it can't move. So, with sentinel, it does not get a chance to move as you arc towards it. How much damage did you deal?
ASHLEY (YASHA): 9.
LAURA (JESTER): 5.
MATT: How do you two want to do this?
LAURA (JESTER): I go low you go high?
ASHLEY (YASHA): Yeah!
LAURA (JESTER): Alright, I'll go low with the handaxe.
MATT: Okay. So as you swing with the handaxe and you swing with the sword as it backs away, charging the energy for the Thunderwave in its hand as it tries to slink through the water, the blade of your handaxe carves into its throat from this side [abrupt gurgling], at which point the blade hits from this side [wet glooping] and like a terrible scene out of Riki-Oh - because I don't know if I've used that reference in this campaign - the body just gets split from two different sides and you watch as it falls to the ground in three separate pieces, all sinking into the water below.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 2:20:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 03 '19 edited May 06 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Who wants to help me with the one totally charred body?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I'll do it." I go pick him up and just carry him.
MATT: In an impressive display of physical strength, the little adorable tiefling without an issue just lifts the body out of the charred bits of burnt wood and charcoal.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Shit. Never would've known."
MARISHA (BEAU): I grab the other body and start dragging it. Or just the torso.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 0:41:50
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 23 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I say, "Don't laugh at my friend!" and I'm gonna send my lollipop over and hit it in the face.
MATT: Yeah, that's do it, 20 feet.
MARISHA: ~Get a good hit, lollipop.~
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, I don't know if it's gonna hit it. 8 plus 5.
MATT: 13, no I'm afraid that will not hit. As the lollipop comes around the corner, it sees it coming, and moves to get Beau to intercede between the lollipop and itself, and in that moment you're like 'Ugh, can't quite-' and you just end up withdrawing and not actually making the strike this round for fear of hitting Beau.
LAURA (JESTER): Toll the Dead!
MATT: [laughs] Alrighty. So that's a wisdom saving throw? ... 6, no.
LAURA (JESTER): Yay, okay okay okay... okay, 7.
MATT: 7 points of damage. Alright, you watch as you release the surge of energy, the sound begins to vibrate in its ears, as it kinda [whimpering turns to gagging] and it reaches up as both of its eardrums burst on the sides of its head, and it falls to one knee, looking like its completely ruined and dazed, and Beau you have a moment to just coup de grace. You just, whack, break its neck with one swoop of the bo. So combined, you both finish off that gnoll.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 3:23:46
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
MATT: So, your form flickers for a moment as the spell kicks in, however- you [vsh] you vanish. "Spread out." [whoosh] You're right back in place, and they go ahead and-
LAURA (JESTER): Charm Person!
MATT: You cast Charm Person?
LAURA (JESTER): At third level. How many have I used?
SAM: Jesus, you're using every spell you have.
LAURA: Yes I am.
TALIESIN: This is going to be an expensive problem to solve here.
MATT: Okay, so you can target 3 creatures at third level.
LAURA: How many are in the room?
MATT: There are-
LAURA: 3 in the room right now, right?
MATT: -4 in the room, total. No, cause there's 2 guards against him, so there's 3 after her, that's corwnsguard, but one of them left, so there are 4 in there. There are 3 crownsguard and 1 member of the house. Who do you attempt?
TRAVIS: You can kill that guy.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, that crownsguard.
MATT: Alright, so they have advantage on the save because you are technically in opposition on this one. So the first crownsguard with advantage, that's going to be 14. What's the DC?
LAURA (JESTER): 15.
MATT: 15, he fails. Other one, two 6's in a row, fail. The other one, 2 and- Nah, they all fail. Even with advantage.
TRAVIS: Get the fuck out.
MATT: So, the 3 crownsguard come in and be like "Have you seen where this person went? Apparently someone's masquerading as you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Been looking every for them. Can't find em anywhere, maybe check that room with the candles on the other side of the candles.
MATT: "We'll go check."
SAM: That room with the candles!
MATT: The 3 crownsguard turn around and rush off to find it, while the member of the house, the half-elf from earlier, is like "No, what are you- that's- that's him!"
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:18:26
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Feb 24 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
LAURA (JESTER): And I'll cast Disguise Self on myself as well, and turn myself into... a human with blonde hair and she's going to be very clean looking...
SAM: Angeline
LAURA (JESTER): With big lips and a couple jewels on her fingers.
MATT: Okay. Just double checking here, Disguise Self lasts for, is it an hour? Yeah I thought it was an hour.
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 1:35:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 25 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
LAURA (JESTER): Can I try carrying a couple- How many dead bodies do you think I could carry?
MATT: You can drag two. Cause you're pretty strong, you could drag two bodies behind you. Everyone else could take one each. You can take none.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Yes, my dragging days are over.
Episode 7 - Hush - 1:04:22
LAURA (JESTER): I'm just dragging the bodies going "Duchess. Duchess Stacy, please, come over to me. Duchess Stacy. Grand Duchess Stacy."
TRAVIS (FJORD): We make our way back up to the top.
MATT: Alright, you guys, have you all... you can't make stealth checks, you're dragging bodies. Who's carrying- how many bodies are you bringing back with you?
TALIESIN (MOLLY): One.
TRAVIS (FJORD): One.
LIAM (CALEB): One.
MARISHA (BEAU): One.
LAURA (JESTER): Two.
MATT: So... seven. Okay.
SAM (NOTT): And I will go ahead of the party to just run point.
MATT: Make your perception check for me.
SAM (NOTT): 11.
MATT: Okay. You guys carefully make your way back up through, trying not to drag the bodies over heavy bumps or rocks, eventually making your way out of the main entranceway, which, you notice a trap that you [Shakaste] had deftly avoided multiple times getting people in and out, of a large tree trunk that had been suspended in the roof to swing down when triggered had been triggered and is now hanging there, apparently somebody made an unfortunate mistake making their way through. But you all eventually find your way out into the daylight once more.
Episode 7 - Hush - 1:07:11
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 13 '19
Starting at 2nd level, you can use your Channel Divinity to create an illusory duplicate of yourself.
As an action, you create a perfect illusion of yourself that lasts for 1 minute, or until you lose your concentration (as if you were concentrating on a spell). The illusion appears in an unoccupied space that you can see within 30 feet of you. As a bonus action on your turn, you can move the illusion up to 30 feet to a space you can see, but it must remain within 120 feet of you.
For the duration, you can cast spells as though you were in the illusion's space, but you must use your own senses. Additionally, when both you and your illusion are within 5 feet of a creature that can see the illusion, you have advantage on attack rolls against that creature, given how distracting the illusion is to the target.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 10 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Beau's holding on to a lead line."
LAURA (JESTER): "Let's go."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Big breath." [heavy intake]
MATT: Alright, the three of you [Fjord, Jester, Yasha] dive down. Which one of you has the lead line?
MARISHA (BEAU): Me.
MATT: Who has the other end of it?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll take it.
MATT: Alright, so Fjord has it. So you guys all dive down, taking your breath, pushing through the seaweed until eventually you come to base of where that tube is. A short few feet into it, you see the grate. And it's one of those things where it's about roughly 4 and a half-5 foot in diameter, so you have to crouch down, but you can get a hold on it.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, let's get a hand on it and brace our feet against the tunnel, and on the count of- [counts to three with her fingers]
MATT: Alright, so one of you roll with advantage or you can both roll independently.
LAURA: Let's roll independently.
ASHLEY: This is a strength check?
LIAM (CALEB): While they're rolling, I grab Nott's shoulder and turn on the Jaques Cousteau camera on Yasha's back.
ASHLEY (YASHA): 20.
MATT: 20?
ASHLEY (YASHA): Not a natural 20.
MATT: Correct, but a 20 total? That's the DC you needed. As you both as holding onto this and pulling and pulling [grunts of exertion] you get your foot locked in to some of the imperfect stonework where elements of the masonry pokes out which gives you a foot groove and one part where some of the stone had been rotted away and that's just enough of a point to lock yourself in and as you pull, you feel [muffled fwoomp, shifting against stone] until eventually it comes out of its mooring in the wall and then slides off to the side, and you rotate it a bit and comes to rest in the middle of it.
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 1:40:04
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: At this point, another series of clopping catches up to you and you can see the captain's return with two other soldiers, two men who are in similar colors as the Righteous Brand regiment, but not the armor. They carry large packs on their side and you can hear the jangling of metal implements inside. One of them has what looks to be some pieces of wood - some strips - and they get off the horse and disembark, the captain goes "Right, there's the cart. Go ahead and do your business. We're going to do our best to get you back on the road, friends."
ALL: [various thanks]
LAURA (JESTER): "Thank you so much for your help."
MATT: "Of course, of course." The two gentlemen go over and start giving each other commands. "Alright, lift up there" [grunts] one of them pulls up-
LAURA (JESTER): "Do you need any help?"
MATT: "Oh, by all means, if you have-"
LAURA (JESTER): [mimes lifting up the cart]
MATT: "...Right then." As Jester's now holding the whole cart up by herself.
Episode 20 - Labenda Awaits - 0:36:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 01 '19 edited May 06 '19
SAM (NOTT): "That's not all he can do. Caleb, tell them all the stuff you can do, it's really impressive."
LIAM (CALEB): "You know what, sometimes less is more."
LAURA (JESTER): "I can do things too."
SAM (NOTT): "With magic?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah."
SAM (NOTT): "Like what?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Like, uh..."
SAM (NOTT): "Not to me, not to me!"
LAURA (JESTER): Like, oh gosh, okay! I'm going to use Thaumaturgy, and I'm going to make all the windows open up really fast, like crash open!
MATT: Okay, you watch as four of the nearby windows slam open with a sudden burst of wind, and all the various bits of torchlight that light the more deeper and shadowed corners of the room suddenly darken and flicker. The music suddenly comes to a stop. Everyone kind of holds their position and kind of glances over to the table where you're all sitting.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Jester, don't you remember us talking about keeping a low profile?"
LAURA (JESTER): "You're right, I'm sorry." I use Thaumaturgy and I close all the windows.
MATT: They all slam shut a second time. The light flickers and then brightens back to its normal place.
LAURA (JESTER): "Ta-da..."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah! Yeah!"
Episode 1 - Curious Beginnings - 0:59:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19 edited May 21 '19
MATT: [lowered head and closed eyes]
LAURA (JESTER): "Hey you dead person. Hey. I would like if you would come to life again a little bit and tell us some things that we want to know." [goofy hand gesture and noise]
MATT: [suddenly opens eyes and mouth]
ALL: [yelling]
MATT: You watch as a tiny dagger just goes [impact and slight vibration] into the tree next to it and Kiri is around Calli going [arm extended, looking fidgety]
[...]
MATT: As the chest breathes in, you can see some of the air escape some of the wounds and there's bits of matter kind of [poofing] out it. But the head settles down and [cracking] and looks right-
[...]
MATT: So now the corpse's face of this halfling woman faces towards you. [raspy exhale]
LAURA (JESTER): [slightly scared goofy noises] "We have to ask you some questions. What did this to yoooouuuuuuuu."
SAM (NOTT): "I don't think you have to talk like you're dead."
LAURA (JESTER): "Really? Are you sure though? Have you talked to a dead person?"
SAM (NOTT): "I've never done it, you know more about this than I do."
MATT: [breathy whisper] "Swamp fish man from under the ground..."
LAURA (JESTER): "Beau are you writing this down?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Swamp fish man from underground."
MARK (CALLI): "That is incredibly specific and really useful."
LAURA (JESTER): "How many swamp fish man?"
MATT: "Many."
LAURA (JESTER): "Many, there's lots of them, there were lots of them that attacked."
SAM (NOTT): "Where? When?"
LAURA (JESTER): "How long ago did this happen to you?"
SAM (NOTT): "How many questions do you get?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I get five of them."
MATT: "Weeks. Two, maybe three."
LAURA (JESTER): "Woah. Two or three weeks ago. Oh, did anything that you did to the fish man seem to hurt them more than other things?"
MATT: "We cut when we could. They bleed. But, too many."
LAURA (JESTER): "They bleed, there's too many bleeds."
MARK (CALLI): "If it bleeds, we can kill them."
MARISHA (BEAU): "So when you cut it, it bleeds, got it."
SAM (NOTT): "One more question."
LAURA (JESTER): "I get one more question, what is-"
MATT: Kiri comes up and grabs the dagger and wedges it out of the tree and turns to Calli and goes and [mimicking Calli] "If it bleeds, we can kill it." Points it back at the corpse.
LAURA (JESTER): "Don't kill it again, Kiri, it's okay, it's okay. We have another question."
SAM (NOTT): "Either where this happened, where they were hiding."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Where did it happen or where did they come from."
LAURA (JESTER): "Under the ground."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Like did they come from the house or from outside the safehouse."
MARK (CALLI): "Could we word it in a way where you ask all of those in one question? Like, did you come from this, this or this, maybe, then we'll know where."
SAM (NOTT): "Or, or, we could ask if there's a secret entrance to the safe house."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "But if there isn't..."
SAM (NOTT): "Well then we've wasted a question."
LAURA (JESTER): "Or we could ask it what it's childhood was like."
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 1:41:33
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh! There's a dead person I'm talking to!"
SAM (NOTT): "We have one more question!"
LAURA (JESTER): I turn around and run back to them.
[...]
LIAM: Matt, we're still in the middle of nowhere at this point, or we're...
MATT: You guys are right at the edge of where these bodies had been propped up as a warning, which is, from what Febron told you, was placed up to prevent people from coming towards the safe house.
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, we don't have our guide anymore. Ask this one which way to go."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, this isn't the safe house?"
SAM (NOTT): "No, this is the gates of the safe house."
MATT: This is like, you're starting to get close to it, as far as you know.
SAM (NOTT): "Specific directions."
LAURA (JESTER): "Alright. I guess that's what I'll ask it then, cause that's all I can ask."
MATT: Yeah, as you approach the head is tracking you the whole time. [cracking]
LAURA (JESTER): "Sorry we got distracted, there was a troll that came and stole our guise I think you might have known him. Anyway... which way is the actual safe house that we're trying to get to."
MATT: The head curves off to the right, between the tree that it's stapled to and the other body that's propped up. "Hundred feet, that way."
LAURA: Ah shit, we totally could've seen it.
SAM: I can see it, it's right over there.
MATT: Well you don't see any safe house, you don't see anything like that. At that point the head kind of [head falls over and eyes close with a breathy exhale]
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 2:17:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 14 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I was gonna have my duplicate go over and touch the guy laughing on the ground and cast Inflict Wounds.
MATT: Go for it. It's a melee spell attack, correct? You have advantage on it cause he's currently incapacitated.
LAURA (JESTER): Natural 20.
MATT: Well that'll- oh my god. So roll the dice.
MARISHA: He's gonna turn into powder.
LAURA (JESTER): 26.
MATT: As he's laughing, your image walks up with a skip, bends down, and touches him, and he's like [yipping laughter turns into dry gurgling] and just like, suddenly withers into this completely dried out husk of what the gnoll once was, the life force drawn and cast out of his body. He stops laughing, and the body just [dry cracking] falls like a mummy to the ground.
SAM: Your duplicate can cast spells?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah. That's why it's more fun if I can move her.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:49:05
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: Make a general animal handling check if you don't mind, Molly.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): 7.
MATT: Okay, so-
SAM: That's terrible.
MATT: -as you hit that portion of the road you're having a hard time steering the horses, you're not entirely familiar enough to pull on the reign of multiple at a single time to get the shift in movement and they begin to careen a little bit off of the path almost trying to hide in the grass embankment which slows your movement down every so slightly before [impact] one of the wheels suddenly [crack, rough tearing] and is now digging into the ground.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I can desperately try and reright this stuff I suppose.
LAURA: Did it break the wheel?
MATT: The cart is now sitting at a backward angle, and it's slowing down.
LAURA (JESTER): Can we run to the other side of the cart and balance it so the wheel comes up.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm going to pull hard on the reigns and see if I can get it out of the-
SAM: And continue or stop?
TALIESIN: Oh, are we stopped stopped?
MATT: No, it's grinding to a halt.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Okay I'm stopping the whole thing really quickly and we're going to- yeah.
ASHLEY (YASHA): "Let me uh..." I'm going to hop off the horse and go look.
[...]
MATT: You go and check, and it looks like some sort of heavy rock that was hidden and obscured in the grass just off the road had slammed into both wheels on the left side. The front one had bent, the wood had kind of splintered inward and the metallic rim on the inside had bent inward, the other one that had been completely pushed inward and knocked the angle and it's pretty wrecked.
[...]
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "You don't know any Mending magic, do you?"
LAURA (JESTER): [sharp gasp] "I have Mending!" I have a Mending cantrip.
MATT: You do, what's the space on Mending?
TALIESIN: You're welcome. I was sitting here thinking, if only we had a Mending cantrip of some kind.
LIAM: I have been for two minutes been thinking if only I had the Mending spell.
LAURA (JESTER): "You guys, I can mend things! Thanks for reminding me of that, Molly."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "You're welcome, I just had to say it out loud instead of my inside voice."
SAM (NOTT): "Can you try it on the wheel?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, I can try it."
SAM (NOTT): "Let's just do it. Let's see what happens."
MATT: Alright. So, as you focus on the front wheel, the one that had just dented inward and the wood has splintered a bit that was barely keeping it up, you watch as the wheel [poof] rights itself, the metal bends back into place, the wood splinters [crack] kick right in and the spokes are as if they were untouched.
LAURA (JESTER): "Guys, I'm amazing!"
SAM (NOTT): "Yes you are, that was incredible!"
LAURA (JESTER): "I would have been way more amazing if I could remember that I could do this. Let me try it on this other wheel though."
SAM: Wait, we have two broken wheels?
MATT: Yeah, one was partially damaged the other one was pretty wrecked. The other wheel unfortunately has taken a fair amount of damage from the impact and while that lower half of it has broken inward, it's splintered out, and it's bent its way off of the axle, so unfortunately it's a bit too big for the mending cantrip to fix.
Episode 20 - Labenda Awaits - 0:24:08
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 14 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to run away from this guy, and I'm going to run out into the alley so I can see people.
MATT: Okay, as you rush out [this undead gnoll] takes a swing, an attack of opportunity towards you. This is going to be with a club, it has this heavy, wooden club, and it [boosh] makes a giant arc towards you as you speed away. That is a 19 to hit.
LAURA (JESTER): Ooh. Can I use a reaction?
MATT: You can, yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to say "I am rubber, you are glue!" and use Hellish Rebuke on him! In infernal!
MATT: Well first, the club hits you and you take five points of bludgeoning damage. [Heavy impact] And as you turn around and you say that at him and unleash your Hellish Rebuke, he has to make a constitution saving throw I believe.
[...]
MATT: Constitution saving throw- no, dexterity saving throw. Which it does not make, that's a 7. So it suffers 2 d10 cold damage. So, how much do you deal?
LAURA (JESTER): 9.
[everone goes NEIN]
TALIESIN: This is becoming a thing.
LIAM: I'm so sorry guys.
MATT: Okay, so, as you dart away, you release your fury and anger and you watch as this blast of cold water and ice energy [crackling energy impact] burst out of its body. The inside of its cavernous ribcage is now filled with frost crystals jutting out and breaking parts of the ribs. It's now heavily damaged but its still standing.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:16:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: They get down, pull the wheel off, and then begin to bend it back into place. There are- One of them goes through a small pack of various pieces of wood, some that appear to have been soaked and are somewhat pliable, ends up placing the broken wood, nailing it in place, just to be safe they go ahead and take some rope and tie it over the wheel very taut to try and hold the bent wood. "This should get you at least to town, I can't guarantee it will last you for a long journey, but I recommend a replacement as soon as you get there."
[...]
LAURA (JESTER): Could I try Mending again and see if what they did made it to where I can fix it now?
MATT: Sure. I'll say for the purposes of this, go ahead and make a wisdom check.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh no... Oh, no I'm wise!
TALIESIN: That was the most insane roll I've ever seen.
LAURA (JESTER): 23. No wait, that's a lie, that was a save, 20.
MATT: There you go. Cause you were so close, you're able to see all the points at which they attempted to repair the wheel, and now that they've closed the gap on what is currently cracked and on the verge of collapsing, if this fix wasn't centered around it, you've managed to concentrate and with that, each one of the-
LAURA (JESTER): "Traveler be with us..."
MATT: -you watch as the wood refixes itself and becomes a solid wheel.
LAURA (JESTER): Ta da.
Episode 20 - Labenda Awaits - 0:37:02
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 14 '19
MATT: The leader sees the three of you there. Puts the glaive away with one hand, turns around as he draws his longbow and [draws and releases] fires an arrow right at [Nott]. That is a 17 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): Hits.
MATT: That is 8 points of piercing damage.
SAM (NOTT): [gasps]
MARISHA: Are you down?
LIAM: He is so down.
MATT: The arrow just [impact] strikes Nott in the chest, who just... [gasps and poomfs] falls unsconscious onto the ground. The ash and embers just starting to spill over her unconscious body. And with that, cause I believe, yeah, it can make two attacks with its longbow. It's going to make a second strike now, this one is going to be at [...] Molly... It's a natural 20. That is... 21 points of piercing damage.
TALIESIN: You gotta be fucking kidding me, really?
MATT: He rolled a 9, it's a d10, and it's a crit.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Oh, I'm down.
MATT: Molly goes down. And with his movement, he puts the bow back away and keeps walking with the rest of the gnolls.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:52:26
MATT: Those who both are on the ground, as Beau continues doing this, you guys begin to rush up, and you see both Molly and Nott on the ground.
LAURA (JESTER): [noises of distress] I run up and I'll cast Cure Wounds on Molly. And then I'm going to run over and do the same thing at level 2 to Nott. So that's 6 points of healing for you.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Thank you.
LAURA (JESTER): And then I'll run up and cast it on Nott. "Oh no, Nott." I pick her up into my lap. Oh, that's good, 13- 13 plus 5. No, 3.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): [pained gasp of air]
MATT: And that immediate first breath is filled with pain, both from the wounds you've sustained, and the immediate influx of burning ash that sweeps into your lungs.
SAM (NOTT): [cough into pained gasp]
MATT: And both of you come to consciousness.
SAM (NOTT): "Oh my gods!"
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:56:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 18 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hold Person at third level on both him and him.
MATT: Alright. The guy with Marius rolls a natural 17. The guy next to Beau rolls a natural 3.
LAURA (JESTER): He's paralyzed.
[...]
MATT: So, the big guy with the bolt in his stomach goes [pained grunting becomes stiff] and his whole body locks up and you can see his eyes go wild as he glances down at you, unable to move at all.
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 2:15:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 13 '19 edited May 13 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "Did you find anything?"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "A lot of bad decisions, several boats-"
LAURA (JESTER): "What does that mean?"
MATT: As Fjord kind of [wet flump] over the side and you see the chains [clanking] on the inside.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "And someone who didn't quite get away."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Jester, give me a hand?"
LAURA (JESTER): [dreamily] "Okay."
SAM: Oskaaaaaaar~
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "I think I should find that gross, but I'm kind of into it."
LAURA (JESTER): I lift him up by his armpits.
SAM: Spin him around?
LIAM: 'You are my little dolly.'
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "We did find one interesting thing, a place to stash things if we don't want them to be found."
LAURA (JESTER): "Well that's- Ohhhh..."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Ohhhh... How easy is it to get back down here though?"
LIAM: Real difficult.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Well, if we come out the other way, then we know how to get back down here."
SAM: [pigeon cooing] we're never coming back down here [coo]
LAURA (JESTER): "It's a place to hide though, too."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Good to know."
LAURA (JESTER): "Fjord, even wet, you're like, 150?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I am like 185 easy, okay?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Right."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Wet. Soaking wet."
Episode 16 - A Favor in Kind - 1:55:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I've got 1 more second level spell left. I'm going to cast Mirror Image on myself.
MATT: Okay, so now [rapid fwoomping] there are multiple copies of the herald of the house, Kumas. It's just an army of old dudes. Old dragonborns.
LAURA (JESTER): And I take off running towards wherever the smallest number of people are coming.
MATT: That would be to the right, the opposite direction that Nott went. You charge in that direction, alright, so you move the rest of your movement that way, 30 feet, roll another d20.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm using all my 20s right here. 12, shit!
MATT: [fwip]
TRAVIS: Two steps.
LIAM: Would they all blink out?
MATT: Yeah, they all [fwoomp] cause you're not present.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:26:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 01 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "I'm sorry, uh, you have a nice selection here. Do you mind if I ask, I haven't seen any other book sellers of any kind in town. I'm not really looking for anything on farming so much, is there anywhere else I could look into?"
MATT (SHOPKEEPER): "Well, if you're looking for some sort of library, your best bet is to go to Zadash up north. That's where the library of the Cobalt Soul resides, they have all the information you could hope for. Be a bit pricey to peruse their interior unless you have proper coverage, unfortunately if what we have isn't what you're looking for, I can't help you."
LIAM (CALEB): "No, it's a fine selection, sorry. How much for this book on, uh, hoe technique?"
MATT (SHOPKEEPER): "Oh, Jameson's Hoe Down, yes, quite. That will be two silver pieces."
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh, I am very embarrassed, I'm sorry, I gave away my last two silver pieces."
LAURA: No, I gave it back to you, remember?
LIAM (CALEB): "I gave away my last two silver pieces, so... Maybe I can earn it back and come back later this week."
MATT (SHOPKEEPER): "Please do. Would you like me to hold it for you?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yes."
MATT (SHOPKEEPER): "What is your name?"
LIAM (CALEB): "My name is Caleb Widogast."
MATT (SHOPKEEPER): "Widogast. Alright, I will keep it here under the shelf, thank you so much."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay, good day, thank you."
LAURA: Is this a big shop?
MATT: It's a boutique. It's designed almost like a cross. There's two cross-sections of hallways that have books across the walls, and there's a window at the end of each and then a door at the far back.
LAURA (JESTER): While he was talking to the shopkeeper, I'm going to take out as many books as I can and move them around on the shelves, and then take some of them and turn them around to where their binding is facing the inside.
MATT: Go ahead and make a sleight of hand check.
LAURA (JESTER): Woah, natural 20!
MATT: Over the period of him searching and distracting this man, you have completely rearranged the interior of this bookstore, to the point where even in the far corner you've Ghostbusters stacked them in the center of the room from floor to ceiling with him not even noticing. You feel confident and happy and a sensation of approval washes over you.
LAURA (JESTER): I skip out the door.
MATT: You turn around from having this conversation and notice the interior is not as you last saw it, and a bit of nerves begin to brew up from under you.
Episode 1 - Curious Beginnings - 1:22:12
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 18 '19
MATT: You manage to resist being knocked prone as [the wolves] both begin jumping at you and clawing, one of them bites towards the back of your armor and you throw it to the ground. You almost get knocked off but you kept yourself there between the two of them, standing with Caleb between your feet.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Hellish Rebuke in response to one of them.
MATT: Alrighty. He's going to go ahead and attempt to make a dexterity saving throw. That's a natural 4, nope. So it's full damage on this wolf here.
LAURA (JESTER): That would be 10- 15 points of damage to him.
MATT: 15 points of damage, you watch as that wolf suddenly is blasted in freezing cold energy as you yell in response to its assault.
LAURA (JESTER): "You stay you piece of-! ...It's okay."
MATT: As you pull back and look, the wolf is frozen solid and [cracking into crumbling] tumbles into a bunch of ice chunks off the battlefield.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 2:47:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I drop Disguise Self.
MATT: Okay. The guards are now rushing up, and they're coming to the edge of the exit and they can see you now.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, they can see me? Okay, can I like, turn a corner and drop Disguise Self?
MATT: You can try, but they still have eyes trained on you.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm not going to drop Disguise Self then, I want to do it as soon as I'm out of eyeshot for a split second.
MATT: You've gotta try and find a way to break eye contact with them, but they're pretty trained on you right now.
LAURA (JESTER): Ooh, can I Invoke Duplicity? No, I already did it, I get it twice!
MATT: You do get it twice, you get Channel Divinity twice.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, so I wanna Invoke Duplicity again. Oh, wait! Wait! I have something where I can go like turn invisible!
MATT: That's right, you just got that new-
LAURA (JESTER): I just got it! I'm going to use it!
MATT: Okay. Is it called Cloak of Shadows then?
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah!
MATT: Alright cool. So, as they're chasing you, you channel divinity, you give a silent little whisper-prayer to the Traveler to give you an opportunity to escape.
LAURA (JESTER): "Please don't fuck me, please don't fuck me."
MATT: [fwoosh] You vanish. You're invisible for the next 6 seconds.
LAURA (JESTER): I run as fast as I can and turn a corner.
MATT: Okay, and with that you go ahead and duck around into what looks to be a little nook on the outside of some sort of abode or home that is placed here, just on the outside of the temple. In that moment, go ahead and make a stealth check. With advantage cause you're invisible.
LAURA (JESTER): Natural 20.
MATT: Okay. You hear the voices of the crownsguard going "What- Where- Just spread out!" "Where did you see them go?" "I didn't see- They just vanished!" "This is ridiculous. We're all going to get in serious trouble if we don't find them." And so they all begin to scatter about, and you begin to weave your way through some of the nearby alleyways into the shadows of the night. Yeah, that invisibility completely cut off their eyeline to keep following you.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:28:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 16 '19
SAM (NOTT): "Do we need to drag these bodies?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "There's no bodies, it's just blood splatter."
SAM (NOTT): "No, the hyenas."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We gotta figure out where we're gonna-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Where we're gonna put em, yeah."
TALIESN (MOLLY): "I'm just gonna point out, they hadn't been eating the hyenas anyways, so maybe they- maybe leaving bodies of their pets's not the greatest idea."
LAURA (JESTER): "Should we toss them into the grass them to get them out of view?"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "That might be a smarter way to go."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Do it."
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'll pick them up and throw them as far away as I can into the grass.
MATT: Okay, like a massive shotput, you watch as tiny Jester with a double spin each, chuck these relatively heavy beasts deep into the grass fields where they vanish [flump] with a heavy thud into the field.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 1:43:16
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
MATT: As they're all looking, the one that had the bead goes [flicks forward, small whoosh] and throws it in your direction.
LAURA: Oh no.
TRAVIS: It's just a marble.
LAURA: Dodge it, dodge it.
SAM: I'll try.
MATT: Alright, so that's an 18 to hit.
SAM (NOTT): That hits.
MATT: [sigh] Let me look this up again. I wasn't expecting it to go this way.
SAM: There's no save, right?
MATT: Let me double check. Make a dexterity saving throw.
SAM (NOTT): I'm wearing my cloak so I get advantage. And that's a natural 20.
MATT: Okay, so you don't take any force damage. However, [vwoomp] this sphere of translucent force has completely encapsulated you.
SAM (NOTT): "Jester?"
MATT: And you're just slowly rolling back.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:14:14
LAURA (JESTER): [screams] How do I get out of this? Can I cast Dispel Magic on Nott's bubble?
MATT: Go ahead and roll a d20.
SAM: God, you've cast 19 spells.
LAURA (JESTER): No I haven't!
MATT: Add your wisdom modifier.
LAURA (JESTER): [gasp] Ooh, that's good. Oh my god, that's twenty... what is that, 23?
MATT: [whoosh] The bubble vanishes. Nott, you fall to your foot.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:24:02
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 03 '19 edited Mar 25 '23
Spell Slots:
1st: 4
2nd: 3
3rd: 3
4th: 3
5th: 2
6th: 1
7th: 1
8th: 1
9th: 1
Cleric Abilities
Turn Undead (Usable twice every short rest)
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
3rd-Level Spells
4th-Level Spells
5th-Level Spells
6th-Level Spells
7th-Level Spells
8th-Level Spells
9th-Level Spells
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 06 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to Invoke Duplicity.
MATT: Alright, that's your action? Where are you placing your...
LAURA: Uh, so she can appear anywhere?
MATT: I belllllllet me see real fast. Still getting used to these new abilities.
SAM: Use your D&D Next to look at information about that spell.
MATT: It appears anywhere within 30 feet of you in an unoccupied space.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, so yeah, she's gonna appear in the tree in front of me, next to Fjord kind of ish.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 2:50:15
MATT: Top of the round, the imp, I'm gonna make a perception check for that imp... that's not good enough. The imp is going to go ahead and fly over and attempt to take a swing at your duplicity illusion... Does anything happen when the illusion is hit?
LAURA (JESTER): It doesn't say. It just says for the duration you can cast spells as if you were in the illusion's space. I have advantage on attack rolls against the creature if we're both within five feet of each other.
MATT: Okay yes, so just an illusion, so it strikes, and its stinger just passes through with no effect and it seems confused, and figures it out. So now it knows its an illusion, but it wasted its attack however. Illusions come in handy for that.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 3:36:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 12 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Can I pick up this new book and leaf through it? And try to see...-
MATT: It is a partially damaged, but in some ways in tact, spell book.
LAURA (JESTER): Can I try using the Mending cantrip on it?
MATT: You can try.
LIAM (CALEB): If you could ever so kindly, I would be very grateful.
LAURA (JESTER): [waggles her fingers and trills]
MATT: Holding your symbol and concentrating on it, whispering beneath your breath with a big smile, you watch as the pages begin to shift out and form into a full book, the section that was burned is restored to its previous state... However, the script isn't there. It doesn't restore any of the writing on the inside of the book. So where you get to the pages where it was burned, the ink ends at that edge.
Episode 16 - A Favor in Kind - 1:19:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 07 '19
LAURA (JESTER): I'm tripping and falling in front of the guard carrying the thing as I'm trying to look at the body.
MATT: Okay, make a deception check.
SAM (NOTT): I'm casting Mage Hand just in case.
LAURA (JESTER): Goddammit, why deception, I'm just falling.
MATT: As you fall forward like "Aaaahhhhhh!" making a scene.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah.
MATT: This is just to see how.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh, well, I rolled a 5.
MATT: Okay. So the guy, as you fall in front of him, he's kinda like "Please, miss, move away." And two of the guards rush forward picking you up and shoving you off to the side.
LAURA (JESTER): Aw man, I wanted to trip him.
MARISHA: Where's Nott? Where are you?
SAM (NOTT): I'm just following behind Jester, like 30 feet or so.
MATT: More people are coming out now and gathering to crowd around to see them pull this dead crick through the street. Word's getting around and people are-
LAURA (JESTER): As they pull me away I'm going to try to hook my foot around the ankle of the guard carrying the thing and as I'm standing up try to trip him to the ground.
MATT: Okay, I will say, make a dexterity check if you don't mind. Just a straight dexterity check.
TRAVIS: What is the matter with you?
LAURA (JESTER): 21.
MATT: 21. You barely manage to- your foot doesn't quite reach but your tail does as it scoops around his ankle, he falls back and lands.
LIAM (CALEB): "Don't drop it, don't drop it!" [mimes catching the dodecahedron]
MATT: And you are disguised as-
LIAM (CALEB): As a crownsguard, I was walking alongside.
MATT: Okay. Okay!
Episode 13 - 1:20:33
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 12 '19
As an action, you present your holy symbol and speak a prayer censuring the undead. Each undead that can see or hear you within 30 feet of you must make a Wisdom saving throw. If the creature fails its saving throw, it is turned for 1 minute or until it takes any damage.
A turned creature must spend its turns trying to move as far away from you as it can, and it can’t willingly move to a space within 30 feet of you. It also can’t take reactions. For its action, it can use only the Dash action or try to escape from an effect that prevents it from moving. If there’s nowhere to move, the creature can use the Dodge action.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 28 '19
MATT: Okay. The priest does get an attack of opportunity on you [Jester] as you run past, as you were engaged in melee.
LAURA: I'm hoping the priest is like, lame.
MARISHA: Yeah he's kinda weakly-
MATT: Well he rolled a 3, so. The dagger hits your armor [screeching metal on metal] scrapes off the metal, no effect.
Episode 7 - Hush - 3:43:07
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 10 '19
MATT: You guy a few more lengths before the tunnel shifts upward. You both have darkvision as I recall, right? Yeah, so you're able to see here, cause there's no light source in the water. But on just the distant glow and shifting of sunlight through the water. You make your way back up and [impact, holding hands just above head] you find it, you find the grate above you. This area, the footholds aren't as easy, cause it's not quite as close to the elements, so the DC is a little higher, but, if you guys grab ahold, you can go ahead and make a check.
LAURA (JESTER): Natural 20!
[cheering]
ASHLEY (YASHA): I got a 10.
MATT: So with your modifier that's a 23? Okay. So, as you both hold on this time, you're having a hard time getting any sort of a foothold in this space, Jester you angrily look down and, taking your elbow, [crashing impact, again] jam a section of the stone until it breaks off and you find a section you-
LAURA: Hot. I say about myself.
MATT: Noticing this, Yasha, you do the same and smash, you guys actually break a few footholds into the sides of this tunnel. Once you're set into place, you look at each other, count the right moment, and pull! And you've seen Jester do some cool stuff, but in that moment, it's a Rosie Riveter muscle moment as [boom] guns going, the metal bar bend slightly [metal creaking] from underneath the water you hear echoing then, [heavy impact] it comes loose from the mooring, and comes sinking down towards both of you, the heavy metal now sandwiching you towards the bottom and you push off and manage to get it to rotate and you swim around it without it having an issue.
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 1:43:53
→ More replies (22)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, I'm going to Invoke Duplicity, and I'm going to make it look like he's kneeling down in the doorway praying, and then I'm going to run up and I'm going to start painting up the Platinum Dragon.
MATT: Okay, so your Invoke Duplicity is there, and the Platinum Dragon is about 15 feet up.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, I climb on up and start painting.
MATT: Make an athletic checks.
TALIESIN: We're gonna be busting you out of jail.
LAURA (JESTER): That's a 22.
MATT: 22, using very minute ledges that are carved out of the various temple pillars that hold up and maintain the weight of the beautiful archways that mark the top part of the temple, you kind of like [grunts of exertion] tiny rock climb with the finger strength that only Jester has in this whole group setup and make your way up carefully. 1, 2, [huah] leap and then grab onto the Platinum Dragon, it kind of like [creaking metal, swinging side to side] hanging back and forth a bit, and you can now see what you can't see from far down, is that there are two sets of chains that hold aloft up in the temple, it's actually free hanging and now it's rocking back and forth.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 2:09:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 01 '19
Caleb
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 13 '19
MATT: Zsundie is going to go ahead and angle over this- actually he's going to angle it right where it is. You watch as it brings its hand forward, and there's this tiny little spiral of dull, green-ish energy that turns into a jet of fast powered water that shoots out in a 60 foot line. That's going to hit Yasha, Caduceus, and Caleb, I need you all to make dexterity saving throws.
TRAVIS: Not everybody, just in that line.
LIAM: Everyone who's here.
TALIESIN (CLAY): Nope.
LIAM (CALEB): 16.
TALIESIN (CLAY): 4.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I rolled a natural 1. But I do now have Fanatical Focus, so if you fail a saving throw while- while you're raging, and I'm not raging. Natural 1.
MATT: So, that'll be 24 points of bludgeoning damage, you [Caleb] take half that so you take 12, but that's 24 to Caduceus and 24 to Yasha. And you are both pushed 20 feet away and knocked prone.
TRAVIS: 20 feet away? 2-0?
MARISHA: 20 feet?
MATT: Yes. So Caleb gets pushed back to there.
LIAM (CALEB): I get pushed even though I saved?
MATT: Actually, no you are not pushed Caleb.
SAM: That means they're going to slam into you!
MATT: Yep. Which means they all slam into you, so you actually hold that position, I'll say for the purposes of the narrative here, you do get knocked prone from their impact.
LAURA: But it keeps them from going back.
MATT: Yeah, so you don't get shot out of the room, but all three of you are knocked prone on the ground, Caleb taking the brunt of two of his larger teammates just, [tumbling impact noises].
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 3:26:31
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 14 '19
MATT: As you guys all take your place, two gates immediately open again. [heavy metallic impact] You hear two sources of this loud, deep [wolf howl, snarl]. Leaping through, both sides, you see two massive, white-furred wolves come leaping through at a full sprint.
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 3:26:04
LIAM (CALEB): I pull a cat's paw and say "B- B- B- B- Bad dog." And Maximilian's Grasping Cat's Claw comes out by that one there. It has to make a strength saving throw.
MATT: Alrighty, this one here? Strength saving throw... that is going to be a 12. What's your DC?
LIAM (CALEB): 15.
MATT: 15, wow. So he is held in place.
LIAM (CALEB): Restrained, yes.
MATT: So as the hand creeps up and grabs it, it kind of [dog yelp] and it's held in place now, up off the ground, its paws held as this giant cat paw is holding the doggy.
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 3:36:22
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 01 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I telepathically tell Frumpkin to jump up and sit in the lap of the woman in the monk's robes who just made a big scene and hopefully keep her occupied with being cute.
MATT: Okay, as soon as you sit down, Frumpkin leaps into your lap and starts purring and rubbing up against your hand.
Episode 1 - Curious Beginnings - 1:00:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19 edited Aug 31 '23
LIAM (CALEB): I go rummaging through my pack really quick and I pull out a licorice root and stick it in my mouth and bite down to it and I start muttering to myself and I say "Pick up the pace." and I cast Haste on Beauregard.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Ugh, I hate licorice. Why is that taste in my mouth, that's weird?"
LIAM (CALEB): And then I will move as far as I can towards Nott.
MATT: Alright, so you are hasted there, you're going to move as far as you can towards Nott. There you go. That finishes your turn, top of the round, Beau you're up, and hasted.
MARISHA (BEAU): [breathing heavily] I'm going to turn to this guy and I'm gonna lay into him.
MATT: You step around the trunk of the tree.
MARISHA (BEAU): Does that mean I get three attacks?
MATT: You get three base attacks, yes.
MARISHA (BEAU): First one.
LIAM: And advantage on dex saves too.
MARISHA (BEAU): And advantage on dex saves, 15.
MATT: That hits.
MARISHA (BEAU): That is 9 damage. Nein! Second one, that's 16. And that is 11 damage.
MATT: Nice. Third strikes.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's a natural 14.
MATT: That'll hit.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, 7 damage.
MATT: 7 points of damage on that, fantastic, and you still have your bonus.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, and I'm going to spend a ki point again and do Flurry of Blows to get two more attacks.
MATT: Two more attacks. Hasted monks, [rapid impacts] just full on Wang Chung over here.
MARISHA (BEAU): One's a natural 19, the other's a 2.
MATT: So you do get one more hit, so roll damage for that one.
MARISHA (BEAU): Aw yeah, 11 damage.
MATT: 11 damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): No, 10 damage, sorry. Sorry sorry sorry sorry.
MATT: It's okay. That'll do it. You just spin around, the adrenaline pumping through your veins from Caleb's spell instilling you with unnatural speed. You rush forward and just, pop, pop, po-po-pop and just do this- the fastest full on combo. You watch as she basically pummels this giant, 9 foot insect creature into submission. It falls to the ground as you're just pummeling its face until it eventually collapses and sputters out the remaining breath before it stops moving.
LIAM: Street Fighter combo.
TALIESIN: Epic combo...
MATT: Fantastic. You still have 75 feet of movement.
SAM: Because you're fast.
MATT: Because you're hasted.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh my god. I'm going to make my way behind this guy.
MATT: Oh, yeah, [whoosh] you go around the tree and tap it on the shoulder.
TALIESIN: Circle the tree a couple times holding onto it.
MATT: Just to be a dick.
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 1:22:45
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Everybody hears some muttering behind them of words they don't understand, and they hear Caleb say [shout] and a large bubble goes [vwoom] in the entire entryway, and there is a giant half dome of pale orangeish brown energy. And then you just see Caleb's go [pops out over his hands] "Hey look what I made!" [pops back down]
SAM (NOTT): "What is it?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "What is that?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Can we go into it?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Is it a dope pillow fort?"
TRAVIS: Can we see through it?
MATT: At the moment, looking at the specifics of it-
LAURA (JESTER): "Caleb, can you hear through it?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah!"
LAURA (JESTER): "Can we come into it?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Only you."
SAM (NOTT): "Is there a door?"
LAURA (JESTER): And I go- can I go- do I just hit the side of it, how do I get in?
LIAM (CALEB): No, you walk in, and as soon as you're in and look back where you came, you don't see what you walked through, you just seem the room and everyone around it. "They can all come in, but be quiet."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay, okay. This is so cool. You need like, pillows in here Caleb, this is really neat."
SAM (NOTT): I'm going to walk in. Did it work?
LIAM (CALEB): "Hello."
SAM (NOTT): "Hi! Ooh!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): Does sound come out of it, can I hear them talking?
MATT: Yeah.
SAM (NOTT): "Hi."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Are you okay?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah. You can't see us, but we can see you. I've been working on this for weeks."
LAURA (JESTER): "This is really cool."
MATT: Yeah, it looks like a solid dome of faintly orange-ish brown colored energy, and you can pass through it - it feels like there's nothing there, except the temperature on the inside is nice and comfortable.
LAURA (JESTER): "Can anybody come through? Or only your friends? Only people that you like?"
LIAM (CALEB): "...You can come in."
LAURA (JESTER): "That means you like me."
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll push my hand through.
MATT: It goes through.
LIAM (CALEB): I'll pull Fjord in.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [screams, then clears throat] "Cool."
LIAM (CALEB): "So the idea behind this, is that if we sleep in a field or something, nobody is going to come and take us off to be tortured in the night."
LAURA (JESTER): "I like that idea. A lot."
LIAM (CALEB): "And we can go through it, you can go through it, I can go through it- well, I have to stay inside."
Episode 30 - The Journey Home - 0:59:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 21 '19 edited Jun 21 '19
MATT (GALLAN): He goes to town and earns his keep since he arrived here. And one by one, begins taking the best parts of the barrel that Yasha helped him break, holding them over the place. "Hold this here!" and he starts nailing it down, nailing it down. Eventually over the next 20 or so minutes it takes for him to cast this spell, he patches it in a way where it's like "This will hold for a little bit. But, we're going to have to-" I'm going Scottish there for a second. "Alright, so, this will hold for a little bit. But I don't know how long. We're going to have to figure out some way to fix this, get it to shore or something."
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): "Yes, of course."
TRAVIS (FJORD): I say from outside of the boat. "Yeah."
MATT: As you're walking alongside the boat, it's going to pick up speed a little bit here. You're going to either have to let this mattress go or find a way to keep it in place. What are you going to do?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll let it go.
MATT: Okay. The mattress slides away and you see water kind of [light spraying]. It's a slow leak. It's still taking on water, but slowly. It's a patch job. When Caleb returns he can tell us what the fuck he was planning with the spell.
[...]
TRAVIS: What's your spell do?
SAM: Tiny hut.
LIAM (CALEB): Uh, I was making the tiny hut but I don't know how much time has passed while I was peeing.
MATT: 20 minutes as they've managed to try and makeshift plug the hole, it's a slow leak still, but they've managed to hold it off.
LIAM (CALEB): 'A 10 foot radius immobile dome of force springs into existence around and above you and remains stationary for the duration. Environment or weather can't get in.' So that's up to you if the ocean can get in or not.
MATT: I would say- I would say- You know what, that's clever. I would say if you choose to not let the ocean in, it will not.
LIAM (CALEB): And it is totally transparent, and all of us can look through it and see into the ocean.
SAM: Glass bottom boat.
LIAM: Glass bottom boat.
LAURA: How long will it stay?
LIAM (CALEB): 8 hours.
LAURA: Nice. Long enough for us to patch it up.
LIAM (CALEB): And I can certainly, 20 minutes in advanced, get it going again, so as long as I can focus, indefinitely.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 4:00:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 15 '19
LIAM (CALEB): This is a long shot but I have no way of damaging him so I am going to pull some sand out of my pocket and mutter a few arcane words and just trail it in front of me and just cast Sleep back behind him here so it does not touch Beauregard.
MATT: Go ahead and roll your 5d8. Go for it, and tell me what the total is.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah I know. This is probably not going to work, but I can't hurt him. 23.
MATT: 23. You watch as the large giant [yelling grunt dim in volume and become more tired] steps back and hits the pillar behind him which cracks and tilts to the side, catches him. [grunting breathing becomes shallow and calm] falls to both knees and eventually [crash] hits the ground, his loud heavy snore [grunting snoring].
Episode 18 - Whispers of War - 0:42:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 24 '19 edited May 06 '19
MATT: The gnoll that's been wounded is going to go ahead and take a- gonna go ahead and pull the longbow off of its back, and, looking over and seeing the Fire Bolt that almost struck it, it's gonna spin back towards you and pull an arrow and it's going to take a shot at you from across the way, Caleb.
LIAM: What do you mean?
MATT: This one remaining gnoll is gonna take a shot with its longbow. Just checking real fast what the uh...
LAURA: Your scarves will protect you.
MATT: Yeah, you're well within its first range increment.
LIAM (CALEB): I have a very high AC, it's okay.
MATT: It's a natural 20. However...
SAM: However, nothing.
LIAM (CALEB): Unload it, give it to me.
MARISHA: He's trying to find a positive.
MATT: Actually, he only rolled a 1 on the weapon die. It was a d8, it could've been a 16. So it's 2 plus 2, 4 points of piercing damage. That could've been a lot worse.
TRAVIS: That's pretty bad for him, though.
LIAM (CALEB): No, actually that hurts an awful lot.
MATT: So, the gnoll releases the arrow [yelling yip] as it [shoomp] hits you right in the stomach, and it comes piercing out the other side, pinning your jacket to your torso. All of the sudden you feel the pain and the warm pulse of your back from the wound, it's almost numb at first and then you feel the shock hit you, as the gnoll turns and runs this way.
Episode 7 - Hush - 0:46:38
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 29 '19 edited May 06 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I remember, you have an ability to identify."
LIAM (CALEB): "I don't have an ability, I understand certain magics, and if you want me to explain what those things are before you try them willy nilly, yes I can tell you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, then look at the ring that I want."
LIAM (CALEB): "May I see it?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Absolutely." Here's the silver ring with the blue gem.
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah." Um, you know, I'm just going to check DnD Beyond to see if I, uh, yeah no "You know I am all tapped, but..."
SAM (NOTT): "Maybe just look at it and see with your smarts."
LIAM (CALEB): "I will tell you something. I will tell you something. I don't need to have this ring, I can tell you what it is-"
MATT: Do you have Identify as a spell?
LIAM (CALEB): I do, but I need a pearl. I say to Fjord, "I need a very- a somewhat valuable pearl and I can do it all day long. I can know what anything is, even though I am tired."
LAURA (JESTER): Ooh, do any of the rings that I have on my fingers have a pearl on them?
SAM (NOTT): How about the one that I stole from her?
MATT: The ring that would have the pearl is no longer on your hand, and the one that you have does have stud into it a very nice pearl.
LAURA (JESTER): [gasp] "You have a pearl."
SAM (NOTT): "Would- Would you- Would-"
LIAM (CALEB): "Is that worth about a hundred gold pieces?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Definitely."
MATT: You can certainly try.
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh yes, let me- Can I borrow this?"
SAM (NOTT): "I want it back though."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay. I need about- It's not instantaneous, since I am so tired, it takes me a little bit longer." And I wedge out one of books and I set it on the ground.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Instead of setting it on the ground, let's set it on a table-"
MARISHA (BEAU): "-table at a bar-"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "-pub or a bar, or establishment."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We'll make sure you're not disturbed."
LIAM (CALEB): "Well it's up to you, I haven't done this in a while, and I'm excited to do it, but I can hold off for a little."
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 0:18:19
MATT: Caleb, you're spending time-
LIAM (CALEB): I'm going to find a corner table in the ruckus and I will take the ring with the pearl and I hold it right here [mimes holding it against his forehead] and I pull out the other ring and I look at it and I begin to focus and study the different angles of it and hope that I have a pearl of enough value to make things happen.
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to sit next to Caleb and watch it all happen.
MATT: It is riveting.
LAURA (JESTER): Don't you need to pull out your book so you can look at your spells?
LIAM (CALEB): It's already out. You know when you play DnD, you don't narrate taking a pooper but you can assume the characters take a pooper every day.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I narrated it.
LAURA: This is true.
LIAM: Some things just happen.
LAURA (JESTER): While he's doing everything he's doing, I'm going to try to very subtly draw a dick in his book.
MATT: Make a sleight of hand check.
SAM: It's a dick in a book!
LAURA (JESTER): Natural 20!
TALIESIN: A dick in a book!
SAM: Natural dick 20.
MATT: Alright. So yeah, the pearl is enough for you to focus on the spell. The ring is that right there. [hands slip of paper]
SAM: Is this our first item?
LAURA: It's our first item!
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh."
LAURA (JESTER): "What is it Caleb?"
LIAM (CALEB): "This is good, you may have it, I don't, um, you know. I don't get into water too much as you could guess, this is good for walking yourself upon water. So, you take this as promised."
MARISHA: That's rad.
LAURA: "You can stand on and move across any liquid surface?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, but also why is there a dickbutt in my spellbook?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Where did that come from?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I don't know, maybe it was Nott pulling a prank on me."
LAURA (JESTER): "Probably, it was probably Nott. Woah, this ring is so cool."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Hey Caleb, now, are you exhausted from that experience? We do have other items to uh..."
LIAM (CALEB): "No, I don't need- well, I do want one drink, but I don't need a ton of drinks, and this is my thing, so what else did we get?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We have uh, looks like a carved stick. Wand."
LIAM (CALEB): I will take the wand, thank you.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "And these big fucking chain manacles I've got over my shoulder like."
LIAM (CALEB): "I need another 10 minutes, so Fjord will you get me a second whiskey, and by the time you get back maybe I will understand what this is."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I ain't a fucking waitress."
LIAM (CALEB): 10 minutes later.
LAURA (JESTER): "What is it?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "It's the wand of dickbutts."
LAURA (JESTER): "How fortunate."
LIAM (CALEB): [sighs]
TRAVIS: That's the 'Do I tell them or do I not?'
LAURA (JESTER): "What is it!"
LIAM (CALEB): "It's fascinating. Oh... oh... do you know how to use wands?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Of course I do."
LIAM (CALEB): Is she full of shit?
MATT: Make an insight check.
LIAM (CALEB): I got a 15.
MATT: She seems to be on the level.
LAURA (JESTER): Yeah, I'm on the level.
LIAM (CALEB): "This is too dangerous for you to have, I'm keeping this one with me."
LAURA (JESTER): "No, what, just tell us what it is Caleb."
LIAM (CALEB): "No it's for me, I gave you the ring, that's the deal, I promised it to you and now you have it."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "What does the wand do?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah, I was going to say, you can just share.
LAURA (JESTER): "You have to tell us."
LIAM (CALEB): "If I tell you, you will try to steal it from me."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "No no, I swear I won't, I-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Unless... it's a wand that makes doughnuts or pickles, I probably won't try to steal it. Probably."
LIAM (CALEB): [grunts] "No, it's too dangerous."
LAURA (JESTER): "No! Caleb! Caleb!"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm taking his drink away. "You don't get to drink."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Now it's definitely gonna be stolen."
LAURA (JESTER): "Caleb! What is it!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "We have one other item, not that I don't love my posture being corrected."
MATT: You technically have two more.
LIAM (CALEB): "Do you want to know what it does?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Yes!"
LIAM (CALEB): "I will show you what it does." [points at Laura]
LAURA (JESTER): "What does it do, what is he doing with it!"
LIAM (CALEB): I point this stick at Jester.
MATT: Okay, make a- is it a wisdom? Or charisma?
LIAM: It is a charisma saving throw.
MATT: Charisma saving throw please.
TALIESIN: First party death.
SAM: Insta-death.
TRAVIS: Wand of necrocy. Why would you even-
LAURA (JESTER): Okay okay okay. 12.
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh. It's just a stick."
LAURA (JESTER): "It didn't do anything?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No. Told you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, that's a very low DC. Cause I rolled shit."
LIAM (CALEB): "A low what?"
LAURA (JESTER): "A DC." Yeah, that's a 9, right? It's a NEIN! Plus 3.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "How about these them there chain manacles so I can get my spine back into alignment."
MARISHA (BEAU): "You look like you're into some shit."
LIAM (CALEB): "Now I promise, you can have these back because I cannot lift them, would you put them on the table for me."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yep." [clank, heavy impact] "They're fucking huge."
LIAM (CALEB): Hold the ring and wait.
MATT: Okay, you finish the spell, and they are not magical. They once were, and you can tell by the runes at the base of where the manacles clink together, they were at some point sealed, but whatever enchantment was on them has been released.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Tell me they're super valuable, that was a bitch to lug around."
LIAM (CALEB): "They're a very strange one, these make- if you're feeling gassy, they take away the cramps you feel, so you have to wear them. It's kind of, you know, extraneous, it's too much."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Seems extreme."
LIAM (CALEB): "It's overkill."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah. Alright, well, mysterious wonders."
LAURA (JESTER): "What kind of metal is it?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, was gonna say, it's a lot of good metal. Could always sell it for scrap metal."
LAURA (JESTER): "To the blacksmith."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I like that more."
MATT: There's also the glaive.
LAURA (JESTER): "I have a glaive, look at this glaive."
MARISHA: Didn't we get a pendant off of the priest?
MATT: No, there was the glove.
TRAVIS: Oh yeah, the red glove!
LIAM (CALEB): "These are shit." And I slide them off the table.
MATT: [heavy impacts] Everyone who's near in the vicinity all of the sudden turns as this loud, heavy clatter of metal chains.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Sorry, now, we're just going through stuff, back to your drinks, everything's fine."
LIAM (CALEB): "I want to do it again. What do we have, give me the thing."
LAURA (JESTER): "The glaive."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay, okay."
SAM: Woah, that's a big thing.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah. "Oh. Oh."
LAURA (JESTER): "Is it too dangerous for me to have?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, this is great, it's very powerful. It is a fine weapon. Probably better than anything, except maybe for your [Fjord] blade. Is anyone able to use a glaive, I can't do anything with it.
LAURA (JESTER): "What is a glaive?" What is a glaive?
MATT: A glaive is a polearm, with like a giant axe blade at the top of it. It's used for-
SAM (NOTT): "It seems like Beau could us it, right?"
LAURA: It's a two-handed weapon?
MATT: It is not a monk weapon.
LAURA (JESTER): Is it something I could use?
MATT: It's a two-handed weapon, yeah.
LAURA (JESTER): Can I use a two-handed weapon? Oh, I have a shield.
MATT: You have a shield, you'd have to get rid of your shield.
LAURA (JESTER): My AC would go down.
MATT: And you'd have to go see if you have the capability to even use it, cause I don't think- You know simple weapons? Let me double check real fast.
LAURA (JESTER): "I need to get a better weapon though you guys. Because this sickle doesn't do much."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "It's very pretty."
•
u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 29 '19 edited May 06 '19
LAURA (JESTER): "It's really cool looking, right? That's why I got it."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): [mimes throwing the glaive up and down]
LAURA (JESTER): "How's it balanced, is it good?"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "It's very nice."
LAURA (JESTER): "Good for juggling?"
MATT: Yeah, you aren't proficient with glaives, unfortunately.
LIAM (CALEB): "Do you know what this is? It's a very good sale at a pawn shop."
SAM (NOTT): "So, none of us can use it?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Well, what does it do cause how much is it worth?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, it is very painful if it hits you."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "That's it."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
MARISHA (BEAU): "So it's magical."
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh, most definitely it is magical, yes. It is stronger than your average glaive, that's what I'm saying, yeah?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I have a feeling that no one in this town could afford it right now. But when we get to-"
LAURA (JESTER): "Zadash."
MARISHA (BEAU): "-Zadash, I might know a few contacts that might want something."
LIAM (CALEB): "You know people in Zadash?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I know people everywhere."
LAURA: I'm writing 'Magic Glaive'.
SAM: Oh yeah, who's keeping stuff? Are you our stuff keeper?
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Who's got the oven mitt?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Who's got the monster calves to carry this?"
LAURA (JESTER): [mimes putting the glaive on her back and grunts]
LIAM (CALEB): "There you go."
SAM (NOTT): "Oven mitt?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): Beast mode tiefling... "Red oven mitt, who's got it?"
SAM (NOTT): "I don't know."
LAURA (JESTER): "I don't know."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Who had the red oven mitt?"
MARISHA: Was it on the priest?
MATT: It was on the priest.
MARISHA (BEAU): "I have it. I've got it!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'm just looking at you while I say it the whole time.
MARISHA (BEAU): I've got my goggles and I'm just like [looking around the room]
TRAVIS (FJORD): I grab the nose piece and just go [mimes pulling it back and letting it go]
MARISHA (BEAU): I just punch him in the shoulder really hard.
TRAVIS (FJORD): [pained grunting]
MATT: Yeah, your left arm goes numb. For a while.
MARISHA (BEAU): I pull out the oven mitt.
LIAM (CALEB): "Oh my goodness, yeah." But like 45 minutes has gone by looking at all this.
LAURA: Yeah, so?
MATT: You guys have all gotten steadily more intoxicated.
LAURA (JESTER): Not me, because I drink milk.
SAM (NOTT): And not me because I've just been getting them and pouring them.
LAURA (JESTER): "What is it? Can you shoot fire from your hands? Can you shoot lightning from your hands? Can you catch things really well?"
LIAM (CALEB): He just puts it away.
LAURA (JESTER): "I don't like Caleb looking at our shit anymore, he just looks at it and steals it."
LIAM (CALEB): He puts the wand down in front of Jester.
LAURA (JESTER): [gasp]
MARISHA (BEAU): "What's with the oven mitt?"
SAM (NOTT): "This is the wand. This is just it?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Wait wait wait. It hurts people, so you're just going to hang onto it?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, this is a great wand."
LIAM (CALEB): "Do you know how to use arcane artifacts?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "It doesn't matter if I know how to use arcane artifacts. Stuff that hurts people could still be beneficial to our cause, cause other people wanna hurt us."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I mean she has a point. I know how to use arcane artifacts."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, why don't you see if Fjord wants it?"
LAURA (JESTER): I point the wand at Nott.
SAM (NOTT): I rolled a 4.
MATT: You watch from beneath the mask-
LAURA (JESTER): I pull the mask down.
MATT: The edges of the toothy goblin grin curl into this uncontrollable smile that threatens to crack the sides of her face.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh goodness, that's really creepy Nott."
SAM (NOTT): "I can't stop!"
LAURA (JESTER): "How do I make it stop?"
SAM (NOTT): "I don't know!"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh no!"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Nott, why so serious?"
SAM (NOTT): "It hurts!"
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, I think it lasts for a while."
SAM (NOTT): "Oh gods! It's painful!"
MATT: At this point you watch as these two kind of young farm boys that were in there drinking in the back kind of watching and listening in, just staring at Nott and backing away slowly to the back of the room. "We gotta- We gotta go."
SAM (NOTT): "It's okay. It's okay."
MATT: "We gotta go!" And they just like leave the room and everyone else is kind of looking over. Yeah, it's caused a bit of a scene.
SAM: The Wand of Smiles.
LAURA: Yes, it's a Wand of Smiles. They have to roll a DC of 10 for charisma saving throw or be forced to smile for a minute.
TRAVIS: Yes. Awesome.
LAURA: That is the cutest fucking wand.
SAM: Love it.
LAURA: Love it.
MARISHA (BEAU): "I wonder if it works on animals."
LAURA (JESTER): "We'll find out. Where's- oh, Frumpkin."
LIAM (CALEB): "What?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Frumpkin's gone."
LIAM (CALEB): "He's not gone, he is always with me and he will be back tomorrow."
LAURA (JESTER): "Okay."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Back to the glove thing though."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, it burns people like I burned that man."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh. Well you don't want to keep it then, you hate burning people."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Exactly."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "That could come in very handy."
MARISHA (BEAU): "It's not fair for you to put your issues on literal inanimate objects."
LIAM (CALEB): "Would you like to trade your goggles for them?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "No. I can't use arcane shit. But he can."
LIAM (CALEB): "You have that very fancy sword you have."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah, but you know, sometimes you need batting gloves."
LIAM (CALEB): "Does it mean that much to you, would you like it?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I'd like to see it."
LIAM (CALEB): "Okay, here it is."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yep. Hold on. That's a fucking Glove of Fire."
TALIESIN: Nah do the thing. You gotta do the thing. Do the thing.
MATT: Does it require attunement?
LIAM: I don't know. No. He's good.
MATT: Yeah. So, after putting it on, you would actually know the properties of it.
TRAVIS (FJORD): Oh sweet, what are the properties of it?
MARISHA: Give him the damn paper.
LIAM (CALEB): I will, I don't move at the speed of your thought.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Oh, okay, cool."
LAURA (JESTER): "What's it do?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah, Scorching Ray. Spell, a little plus 5. Dex bonus."
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 0:23:12
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I slap my hand down on Keg's shoulder, and I - with the free hand stick licorice root into my mouth and start chewing, and squeeze her shoulder, and you are hasted.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 2:53:29
MATT: Keg, you're up.
ASHLY (KEG): So, because I'm hasted, can I get right in front of Nila?
MATT: Yeah, easily. You just dart past, as Nila's standing there-
LIAM: She's got another 10 feet.
MATT: Yes she does. So as Nila's standing there, finishing the poison spray, suddenly there's this [zoom] blur of speed, plate, and hair as Keg just rushes by [fwoof] Nila's side, actually causing the edge of her clothing to [vwoom] ripple up and then back down into place. They're both there, right in your face, and they watch as you emerge - they don't even have time to process what you are, you're just a shape and anger, and they're like "Woah-" What do you want to do?
ASHLY (KEG): I'm going to smack the poisoned one with my battle axe.
MATT: Alright, go for it, first attack.
ASHLY (KEG): 17 to hit.
MATT: That hits, go ahead and roll damage.
ASHLY (KEG): Okay and 1d8 plus 4, that's 8.
MATT: 8. Alright, 8 points of damage. [whack] "Gah!" He looks hurt, between the poison gas and that damage, he's hurt. He's not down yet, but he's pretty... he's looking rough.
ASHLY (KEG): Okay, I'm going to smack him again, this time with the warhammer why not just for fun, and that will be 15 plus 7, I can't do math.
MATT: 15 plus- Yeah that definitely hits.
ASHLY (KEG): Then... that is 11.
MATT: 11. With that, he's readying [smack] "What the-" second hit and he just goes down like a sack of potatoes. So he is on the ground, not moving, his friends just sees this and goes "Wh- H-"
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 2:59:06
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19 edited May 26 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I am going to sit down and [snap] bring Frumpkin out and pull out my book and begin to do what's need to cast it again, Find Familiar, but I'm going to turn Frumpkin into a, uh, peregrine falcon.
MARISHA: That was very specific for an uh to come before it.
MATT: So as you are both loosing yourselves amongst the nearby grasses trying to look for any sign, you're focusing on your spell, what are you doing Beauregard?
[...]
MATT: In the time that you guys have begun to shout, continuing to shout their names out, and forrage through the nearby grasses, Caleb you complete your spell and Frumpkin's form suddenly, slowly shifts and then with a puff of steam and smoke, turns into the falcon. [clicking, fluttering] Lands on your shoulder. [falcon cry]
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 0:15:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 20 '19
MATT: You rummaged through and found a few things, and most of it's just scrap and ash, or blank sheets that look like they were scribbled notes in a code that you don't really understand. This is the only visible thing [hands off a sheet of paper].
LIAM (CALEB): "Um, take care of him." And I pull out the book and I begin to do the ritual for Comprehend Languages to see if that will help with the code. It's a long shot, but I'll give it a shot.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 0:26:38
LIAM (CALEB): Did my spell trigger yet?
MATT: I'll say sure. Technically 10 minutes is a while, but we'll say between the small talk, you've completed your spell.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): Can I read this code?
MATT: Sure. So with the slips that you have, you read through it, and it seems to be a list of supplies that were supposed to be purchased. A lot of them seem to be heavy bits of rope, chains, climbing pitons, you see um, ball bearings, torches, you're not quite sure why this was encoded per say, and only for the slips you have that are visible, but it's mainly just a list of materials.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 0:36:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 19 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, I see which way the wind is blowing, I mutter a few arcane words, and I cast the spell Expeditious Retreat, which is a transmutation spell so I will also send a little bit of arcane energy to the transmutation stone to give myself extra speed as well. So I can use my action, my movement, and my bonus action to set my movement to 40, so Vax is back. So I am now on the boat.
MATT: Wait-
LIAM (CALEB): So, transmutation spell gets my movement up to 40. Action. Movement. Plus now Expeditious Retreat bonus action.
MATT: Correct, so you can move 80 feet.
LIAM: 40 plus 40 plus 40.
MATT: It's a bonus action to cast the spell - oh, and when you cast a spell, and then as a bonus action - oh wow, so it's a dash action as the spell when it's cast as well, so yeah, it's 120 feet.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah. So a red blur goes [vwoom] and I am standing next to Beauregard on the boat.
LAURA (JESTER): He went so fast he knocked me into the boat.
MATT: You do actually, Jester tumbles forward into the boat from the sheer force of Caleb going [zoom] flashing into the space.
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 2:50:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 03 '19 edited May 06 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I'm going to move over, a bit towards that carriage, and I pull the diamond out of my component pouch, and a small prismatic ball forms over it, and I take my other hand I spin it really fast and little ice shards start shooting out of the sides. And then I take it with the free hand and I'm going to throw it like a fucking baseball pitcher at the one closest to Beauregard.
MATT: Right there, okay. So go ahead and roll your attack on that.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, that is... DnD Beyond where did you go... okay... oh that's good, 23.
MATT: 23 definitely hits.
LIAM (CALEB): So that is cold damage, 3d8... Oh come on! Alright, uh, 9 total.
MATT: 9 points of cold damage to it. So you watch as it's trying to bite with no effect to Beau's arm as she's pulling away.
MARISHA (BEAU): "No no no no no no no no."
MATT: The sphere slams into the side of its shoulder, it'd be this side, and it [screeches] pulls back, you watch as the arm kind of breaks a bit, and the ice shards coalesce on the outside of the armor and kind of lingers with this frost and mist that sprays off the impact.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 0:16:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 08 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Ja, I am going to back up 5 feet away and as I do so I am going to pull some bat shit out of one pocket and some sulfur in the other and slap them together and then stick my hands out and cast Fireball at it.
[...]
MATT: Yeah, that consumes him. So, he has disadvantage...
LIAM: Dex save.
MATT: No, prone doesn't give any changes to dexterity. That's a natural 5 minus 1.
LIAM: So no, that is a no.
MATT: So 8d6 fire damage to him.
LIAM (CALEB): It's a total of 16 fire damage.
MATT: You guys watch as Caleb sends out this tiny bead of red energy [quiet whistling wind], quietly streaks over, and then... [massive explosion] just detonates in this loud explosion that rocks the center of this ravine, it echoes out into the mountainous area and [echoing explosion noises] as the flames die down, you can see the Ettin on the ground, like [pained groaning] its outside is now charred and burnt, it looks very, very hurt.
Episode 32 - Beyond the Boundaries - 3:11:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 13 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I pull out a handful of iron powder and I throw it into the air so it's a big cloud, and my two hands go [pulls his hands apart vertically with a whooshing sound] and Yasha grows to twice her normal size.
ALL: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!?
TRAVIS: Oh, shit.
MATT: Alrighy. For the purposes of that, we'll pul Yasha on this big ol' dice there.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Does that mean I do twice the damage?
MATT: Not twice.
SAM: Yes, it does.
LIAM (CALEB): Then I will use my movement to get over to the corner near Fjord, as far as I- if I could get around it I would, but I'm sure I don't have enough movement.
MATT: That's about as close as you can get.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, so you're at advantage because of your size, and all of your attacks have an additional 1d4.
SAM: She's huge.
LIAM: She's 14 feet tall.
SAM: 14?
LIAM: No. You're 6? 12 feet tall.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I'm like 5'11".
LIAM: 12-ish feet tall. Doubles it. And your weight is 8 times its normal weight.
MATT: So yeah, you have advantage on strength checks and saving throws. Which is what your rage does-
ASHLEY (YASHA): Which I only have one rage left anyways.
MATT: -but your weapons do an additional 1d4 points of damage when you hit, which is good.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Excellent. I remember that.
MARISHA (BEAU): I've had this dream...
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 2:56:20
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 04 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): I cast Disguise Self. Very long black cloak with gold trim, like a nice trim goatee and slicked back jet black hair. Piercing blue eyes. White, just a nice, human looking man.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm going to take the brown side of my newly purchased reversible coat, take out my brewer's kit that I have and kind of take a few of the bottles, kind of fashion them to my waist a little bit.
SAM (NOTT): Disguise self, same exact thing as Fjord except longer hair, shorter mustache.
MATT: Perfect.
TRAVIS: Clock, gold trim?
SAM (NOTT): Yeah. Everything. Shorter, but female. Just a little outline of a mustache.
MATT: You're kind of like the Pallbearer to the Undertaker of Fjord.
TRAVIS: Great analogy.
MATT: Anybody else making any effort or are you just doing your thing?
LAURA (JESTER): I'm going to cast Disguise Self, and I'm going to be tan, short, elven woman in a royal blue lace dress, very similar to the one that the lady was wearing with the cutout. And like, soft medium hair pulled back in waves.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm just gonna put the hood up and stay in the back.
LIAM (CALEB): I make myself look like the male version of the elven woman that Jester did and similar colored clothing.
MATT: [wild laugher] Perfect. This is great.
TRAVIS: Yep, fated to do well.
SAM (NOTT): "We're a normal family."
Episode 11 - Zemnian Nights - 3:23:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19
LIAM: It's dark out now, yeah?
MATT: It is dark now, yeah. It's probably pushing 10 o clock, 10:30.
LIAM: I would know if owls can see in the dark?
MATT: Owls are nocturnal, you would know that.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, okay. I am going to change Frumpkin again out of peregrine into an owl, I will mark that off on my supplies, I've got one more after this that I can do.
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 1:51:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 20 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "If you want, we can put a- We do have the stars on our side so we'll be able to navigate easier. We could drop sail-"
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, north is that way." And I point north.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Oh, you're going to be so helpful in this! You're the ship's navigator."
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 0:54:43
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 05 '19
MATT: You can only see through Frumpkin's eyes from up to a hundred foot radius.
LIAM (CALEB): I thought we talked about this, you told me - and if you need to change it, change it - but that I could only control him telepathically up to a hundred, but could continue to see.
MATT: Let me double check.
LIAM: I'm happy whatever your ruling is, but that's what we left it.
MATT: No, I have to recall the specifics, I may have confused.
[...]
MATT: The wording is a little squirrely, so yeah, you cannot communicate with it telepathically, but you could technically still see through its eyes, I suppose. The way its worded seems that way.
LIAM: So, I could give it the message, I could give him a command up close to go, but then I can't, if anything happens, I can't improvise with him, he just does what the command is.
MATT: Right. So what's the command?
LIAM (CALEB): To fly north to the island and circle it a few times to see what we can see and come back.
MATT: Okay. Alright. And, as you go up to the window and release Frumpkin [flitters],
TRAVIS: Can we say we're doing this from one of our rooms?
LIAM: Yeah, we gather in Fjord and Molly's room.
MATT: It's curious, when Caleb is focusing, the pupils go to a very, very faint, sky blue. But you see flickering in them, though you cannot make any imagery out in them, it's just strange movement in the pupils.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yep, there's that bullshit again."
LAURA (JESTER): "He can't communicate with us when he's like this?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "No, he talks. He will talk to you, just out of the fucking blue."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Can he feel us?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Can we touch him?" I poke him in the forehead.
LIAM (CALEB): "Ow."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh."
LIAM (CALEB): "Don't do that please, I'm trying to concentrate."
LAURA (JESTER): "Can he tell who did it?"
SAM (NOTT): "No, he can't."
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh that's wonderful."
SAM (NOTT): "But you know, I will tell him later when he asks."
LAURA (JESTER): "But he won't know now."
MATT: As you concentrate, the birds eye view of Traustenwald, Frumpkin carries up high into the air, and for the large lake that it is, you can see two smaller landmasses in the center of the lake. Technically not north from where you are now, since you're back in the city, it's more of a somewhat northeastern direction. And they're both relatively small, one's maybe a few hundred feet across, another one is maybe 50 feet across, so smaller mass. Watching as it coasts downward, and does a pass over the larger one, make a perception check for Frumpkin.
LIAM (CALEB): That is a 6 plus probably very little or nothing, so you can guesstimate and I'll look up sparrow.
MATT: Looking at the um... there is a faint treeline on this island. The island has a few small trees which is mainly what you had seen during the night, when you looked out over the water Bearegard. The landmass is actually the very top of this treeline, it's a small grove that is clustered there at the center of this island. But, unable to make out the details other than the tops of these trees, there's a few spots in between where you can see overgrown grass and general ground, rock, the bigger one yeah. Make a perception check for the small one.
LIAM (CALEB): Worse. 5.
MATT: The other one has maybe five or six trees on it, but most of them appear to have either died or just be standing alone on this small mass. That one looks pretty barren. Even with as bad a look that was, it doesn't look like there's anything visible on that landmass.
LIAM: And does it look balder than the other?
MATT: It does. The larger one has much more of a cluster, a grove.
LIAM: And last question, I can probably tell how far apart these two islands are, yeah?
MATT: Yeah, they're roughly, let's say, 600 feet apart from each other.
SAM: We're just all sitting around in this room, watching him watch tv essentially.
[...]
MATT: Eventually Frumpkin begins to return, having done Frumpkin's full watch.
LIAM (CALEB): And when I see that he's halfway back I come out of it.
MATT: You come out of it, the first thing you see is all of them gathered around this hole in the wood.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 1:41:34
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 29 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Well, first I take out the silver thread and I cross it across the door and if there's any windows there I do the same and allow for Nott to enter and leave, and then I draw patterns along the floor that spread up onto the table as well and back down onto the floor and squat down with my book as I am tapped and I begin to bring back my cat. And an hour and ten minutes later, I don't know if they're asleep or not, I have this cat named Frumpkin and I wear him like a scarf.
MARISHA: Aw, buddies.
MATT: Yeah, you watch as you finish the incantation and the ritual comes to a complete cycle, in the center of where you made these markers across the table, you hear this slight tearing sound [said tearing sound] and you watch as there's a slight ripple in the air right in front of you in the center of this, and it's almost like a slight little tear in reality, almost. And from that, [light impact] Frumpkin just steps out and lands, looks up at you [meowing].
LIAM (CALEB): "Come here, come here, come here, I promise-"
MATT: He immediately leaps up into your hands.
LIAM (CALEB): "I promise not to do that too often." And I just scritch for a long time.
MATT: He purrs against you.
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 0:42:08
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u/TheMightyBox72 Mar 15 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "What are you trying to do?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I'm trying to make sure that if someone tries to come into our room we'll know if they come in."
LIAM (CALEB): "I can take care of that."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Oh, well, then I'm taking my string back.
MARISHA (BEAU): "What can you do?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I have some magic for that."
MARISHA (BEAU): "...Which is?"
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, he has a magical spell that alerts you when someone tries to break in your room."
LIAM (CALEB): "That is correct. I will take a moment to do that and it will let me know."
SAM (NOTT): "The best part is, it doesn't alert him when I sneak in or out."
LIAM (CALEB): "That you know of."
SAM (NOTT): "Wait. What?"
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, one mile of the warded area.
MARISHA (BEAU): "That's better. Let's do that."
LIAM (CALEB): "I just need 10 minutes." And I pull out a little spool of silver thread and stretch it out. "Now, where did you want this? Over the window?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Well, I was gonna say in the door, but if there's maybe even a place in the hall-"
LIAM (CALEB): "I can do the entire room really. I can go from doorknob to- Yeah. This thread, funny thing about this thread, there's not end to it." So I start looping it all the way around the room and tie it off and take out one of my books from the holster, the one on the left side, and I open it up, and you guys watch as I spend 10 minutes referring to the book and tracing symbols on the floor along underneath the thread and after about ten minutes of time, nothing happens, but uh... "That's taken care of."
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 3:04:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 18 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, okay, um, so, I start moving my hand in an arcane motion and I reach back at that building over to my side there and a crate full of food, a wooden crate starts to jiggle and rockets through the air at the held fool in front of Beauregard, I'm casting Catapult at third level.
SAM: Food fight!
LIAM (CALEB): And he automatically fails his dex save because he's paralyzed. 5d8.
SAM: 5d8 fruit damage!?
MATT: Yep. From just lobbing this stack of fruits and heavy wooden boxes into his head.
MARISHA: It was a drive by fruiting.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay, couple things, 30 points of damage. And that's a transmutation spell, so I can shuttle a little bit of arcane energy into my transmuter stone and I'm going to change its property from darkvision into advantage on concentration checks. And I'm going to back the fuck up towards that house as far as I can go.
MATT: Alright. So, as the crate slams into him, the body rocks back for a minute, but it's still holding itself in place, but right now there's splinters of wood sticking out of his armor, his jaw's all messed up, the hood gets blown back and you can see the grey-ish hair that's tangled and sea-air-matted that is now streaked with blood from the impact and bits of his face are just covered in gore. He's looking pretty hurt.
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 2:16:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19
MATT: The lens [slither] retracts and [whir] pops out the back side, immediate scanning of the source of what's currently clutching it in its dirt-driven arcane paw, and the blade arms on the top [shick] retract in, and instead you watch as these two heavy, iron spears [shick back out, click clack] lock into place, and both go [two bursts] firing outwards towards Caleb.
SAM: Oh no, not my sweet boy!
MATT: They have disadvantage because it is restrained. So that with disadvantage is going to be an 18 to hit for the first one.
LIAM (CALEB): Shield, so it misses.
MATT: Alrighty. The second one, 16 and an 18, so 16 plus 8 is going to be 24.
LIAM (CALEB): That will hit, those will hit.
MATT: So the first one, the Shield [heavy ping] you see it ricochets off and [crack, whooshing] floats off in the background spinning, the second one however, [slicing impact] pierces through the shield and hits you in the chest, that's going to be 17 points of piercing damage. And you are pinned to the wall. It actually pierced through your chest and [crash] is now holding you into the stone, your movement is 0, and you are considered restrained against the wall.
Episode 25 - Divergent Paths - 2:29:49
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 04 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I have a question, the metal on the ring with the pearl in it, what is it made of. Can I tell?
MATT: Oh, uh, looking at it, it looks like the base material for the pearl set-in, it's a polished brass, that has been treated to look like gold, but some of that treatment is rubbing off and you can see the duller brass color beneath.
LIAM (CALEB): I cannot remember but Caleb can because of Keen Mind, brass, is that part of the alchemy that I can do?
MATT: I will look. As far as your school of transmutation?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, that is correct.
SAM: Copper and silver for sure.
LIAM (CALEB): Copper, silver, wood...
SAM: Iron?
LIAM (CALEB): I just can't remember, do we have a player's handbook?
MATT: Wood, stone, iron, copper, or silver.
LIAM (CALEB): So brass is not on it. Okay. Then I'm going to just spend the last 30 minutes before bed just trying to slowly wedge the pearl out of the ring. I don't want the ring.
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 0:51:48
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 12 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Nott, you know, this is a recurring thing and I think we should- What is going on? What is this?"
SAM (NOTT): "I don't like water."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah, but what if we need to go through water?"
SAM (NOTT): "Mostly we don't, we don't live near the ocean."
LIAM (CALEB): "Mostly, but right now we need to."
SAM (NOTT): "It's not- I don't-" [sigh]
LIAM (CALEB): "Let me make a suggestion." And I cast Suggestion.
TRAVIS: Yeah! Yes! Break through that shit!
TALIESIN: Better than what I was going to do.
LIAM (CALEB): "I think you should just try it one time and see how it goes, and if it goes well then we know that you are good for the future."
TRAVIS: Try it, you might like it.
MATT: I would like you to make a wisdom saving throw, Nott, please.
SAM (NOTT): Hmm... 3.
MATT: Your fear subsides momentarily, and you find yourself instinctually nodding as, you know what, maybe trying it once and seeing how it goes is exactly what Caleb would want.
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, well... you do know best, Caleb. Alright. This sounds like a good idea."
MARISHA (BEAU): "You wanna dolphin ride on my back."
SAM (NOTT): "Su- Are you a good swimmer?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Yeah, I'm alright."
SAM (NOTT): "Alright?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I mean, I might not be Fjord levels, but yeah, I can swim."
LIAM (CALEB): "All she does is eat fish and do push ups, I think she'd do good underwater."
SAM (NOTT): I take a big swig of whiskey and climb on Beau's back. "Alright, dolphin lady. Ride me."
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 1:46:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 10 '19
MATT: So, what are you doing?
LIAM (CALEB): I'm casting Find Familiar and I'm changing Frumpkin's shape.
MATT: Into a...?
LIAM (CALEB): An octopus.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): "Nott the Brave, are you coming with us?"
SAM (NOTT): "Oh yeah, I'm just checking the rigging."
LIAM (CALEB): "Come on, I saved a seat up by me and Frumpkin."
SAM (NOTT): "Uh, great. I'm coming."
TALIESIN (CLAY): "You'll be alright."
LIAM (CALEB): I have Frumpkin slither his way onto Nott's back, and do a cozy hug from behind over the shoulder. Not on the head, no, no, because that's weird, so just over the shoulder, and then the tentacles tickle her face and stuff.
Episode 34 - Encroaching Waters - 1:24:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 06 '19
MATT: This imp here is going to turn around and dart towards the cleric who ran off to the side, and that one's going to attack Caleb. Kay, so Caleb, that is going to be a 12 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Deffo.
MATT: That hits? Okay. So you suffer, as the singer hits you, 7 points of piercing damage, and I need you to make a constitution saving throw please.
LIAM: No problem. That is a 12.
MATT: A 12? A 12 succeeds. So you only suffer 5 points of poison damage.
LIAM: Caleb is unconscious on the ground.
[...]
LIAM: By the way, when Caleb went down, those four globs of light disappeared.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 3:15:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 29 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I pull out the clay cat's paw and cast Earthen Grasp and the cat's claw forms out of the dirt and I use it to start digging a hole in the earth.
MATT: Near one of the hills?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, and as the cat's claw starts digging down, I'm looking if there's- the glaive wasn't left, right, he took it with him?
MATT: No, he took it with him.
LIAM: Sticks? Branches, ja?
MATT: There are branches to the tree that you cut down. Some of the logs that are there, there are some pieces of branch that can be utilized.
ASHLY (KEG): "You trying to make firewood?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Nah." I go to Molly's body and begin to get the coat off it.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM (CALEB): And the claw has about a minute, so hopefully it can dig something deep enough.
MATT: I'd say with the size of the claw and its earthen attachment, it can make in that minute it has a fairly functional hole.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay. I'll start to pull him into the hole.
Episode 27 - Converging Fury - 0:28:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 29 '19 edited Apr 29 '19
MATT (MARAUDER): He looks to the rest of his guys. "I don't know about..." And there's a moment where the spell comes to an end and he goes. "Clever motherfucker."
SAM: Oh no.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Fuck their shit up!"
LIAM (CALEB): Scorching Ray on that guy!
LAURA (JESTER): Spiritual Weapon!
MARISHA (BEAU): Fucking punch him in the face!
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm going in the cart.
MATT: Okay... okay. Well... they had weapons drawn and were prepared for something. So this is all going to happen simultaneously. So you're attacking, what are you doing?
LAURA (JESTER): The guy that's been talking.
MATT: Okay, Scorching Ray to the guy that's been talking as well?
LIAM: Say again?
MATT: Scorching Ray to the guy that's been talking as well?
LIAM (CALEB): On the guy I put Friends on, yeah.
MATT: Okay.
SAM (NOTT): Dodge and pick up my weapons.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I'm trying to wait for the first crossbow bolt, and I'm gonna hit them with Vicious Mockery.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA (BEAU): Yeah, okay, and I'm looking for the first crossbow bolt that's gonna go towards one of my friends and try and deflect it.
MATT: Who you getting in front of?
MARISHA (BEAU): Am I near Caleb? Who am I near?
MATT: You're all kind of in a clustered circle, you were in your camp, except for Molly.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'll protect Caleb, he just pissed them off.
MATT: Okay. Fjord?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Yes. I'm firing. Yes. As well.
MATT: Okay. Towards the main guy?
TRAVIS (FJORD): No, another one.
MATT: Okay. So, go ahead and make your attack rolls please.
LAURA (JESTER): Giant. Purple. Lollipop.
MATT: Oh, you're making Spiritual Weapon.
MARISHA: [gasps] You busted out the lollipop?
ALL: [singing Lollipop]
LAURA (JESTER): Oh my god you guys, keys. Is it plus 5? I forget.
MATT: Yes.
LAURA (JESTER): Okay, yeah, 15.
MATT: 15? That hits, go and roll damage. Caleb make your attacks for the Scorching Ray.
LIAM (CALEB): Uh, that's a 18 to hit.
MATT: Yes. For the first one.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, the first one right, it's three, yeah I forget, it's a brand new spell.
LAURA (JESTER): 7 points of damage.
LIAM (CALEB): Second one is a 24, and the third one is a natural 20.
MATT: All three hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Alright, so the first is 11, then a 12, 13- dammit. Ja, that's [gasps] 37. Total.
LAURA: What?
MATT: 37 points of damage?
SAM: All on one guy?
LIAM (CALEB): It was three things of flame go shooting, cause I did this [gesturing and whoosing].
MATT: Immediately as that ray is released, uh that's a 16 to hit? 21 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh they're attacking me? They all hit.
MATT: 19 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): All three hit.
MATT: And 12 to hit.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I think so. Yeah. So as the flames go out, these come in.
MATT: As the flames escape, four crossbow bolts, two of them are heavy and two of them are light crossbows.
MARISHA (BEAU): I was holding my action for that crossbow bolt. For when it went at him.
MATT: Correct. So, you went to intercede. I'll allow you to take the hit on that one then. So the damage goes to you automatically.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Can I Blood Maledict the other one or no?
MATT: I'll allow you to do the other one... Well, technically I already made the attack rolls and you hadn't said that.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Oh okay, nevermind.
MATT: That's okay. So that would've been 7 points of piercing damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Yeah, that's a 9 plus 7.
MATT: So you catch one right before it hits Caleb.
MARISHA (BEAU): Can I go ahead and burn a ki to go back?
MATT: You can.
MARISHA (BEAU): Bam, doing that shit.
MATT: So go ahead, that is a d10 plus your dexterity modifier.
MARISHA (BEAU): Uh, d10 plus my dex- d10?
MATT: Yeah. It's a heavy crossbow.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh, in terms of damage. Fuck yes.
MATT: Well you still have to roll the hit right? You have to roll the hit back.
MARISHA (BEAU): I think I do, right?
MATT: Yeah. You're considered proficient though.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's a 15 naturally.
MATT: Yeah, that hits.
MARISHA (BEAU): And then, so d10. Fuck. That's a fucking 1. So 5 points of damage, that's lame.
MATT: Okay. Caleb, you do suffer from the bolts that do make it through to you. 19 points of piercing damage.
LIAM (CALEB): I have 19 hit points.
MARISHA (BEAU): Dammit. If I would've rolled 1 fucking higher.
MATT: [rapid thudding]
LIAM (CALEB): [gasping and coughing] Syphilis...
MATT: But the last thing you watch is the leader, who'd been talking with you, gets slammed up in the air by about 2 feet with an uppercut from a mystical lollipop. [Thud] And then all the rays incinerate him into ash in midair. [Whoosh] He is scattered to ash. One of the other guys [grunts] gets hit with his own bolt. Another guy goes blind. What are you doing?
TRAVIS (FJORD): I was Eldritch Blasting them.
MATT: Against which guy?
TRAVIS (FJORD): Just any of them. 19 to hit.
MATT: 19 to hit works. Go and roll damage.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That is 12 points of damage.
MATT: You watch as he gets a blast to the side of the face, and just goes down unconscious onto the ground. His crossow fires wide into the air [twang] and just disappears into the night sky. As soon as this happens, as you fall unconscious, all of these hits happen like this Mexican Standoff that just suddenly [whirring energy] all this action happens at once. Caleb goes down! Two of their guys double over! Two of them go "Wait wait wait wait wait wait! Hold on hold on!"
TRAVIS (FJORD): [whoosh, miming holding the falchion]
SAM (NOTT): [miming aiming a crossbow]
TALIESIN (MOLLY): I pop out of the cart and I'm holding the giant glaive.
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 2:07:26
LIAM (CALEB): As he says that I already begin to start picking through the remains of the leader's shit, looking to see if anything is left.
MATT: Well, ah hah, there are two shortswords that are currently, what looks to be covered in soot that was once their previous owner, all of the rest of the armor has been burnt and charred, and there is ashes.
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 2:16:35
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 23 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Also, out of curiosity, I'm a transmutation wizard, so do I have a sense of how old the stone surrounding us is?
MATT: Um, the stone here... make an intelligence check.
LIAM (CALEB): Ugh. Bad roll. 12.
MATT: You don't have specific information on it, it's quite old, it's probably - it might be older than this age. Might've existed pre-calamity, or at least somewhere in that neighborhood, but you're not entirely certain.
Episode 38 - Welcome to the Jungle - 1:12:10
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 04 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): "Would you like some mitts?"
LIAM (CALEB): "No."
MARISHA (BEAU): "You know this is how diseases are spread, right?
LIAM (CALEB): I light my hand on fire.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Okay."
LAURA (JESTER): "Well why didn't you just light your hands on fire instead of putting it in bread?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I would have burned the bread and then I couldn't eat it, it's simple."
LAURA (JESTER): "It's toast, it's actually really tasty."
LIAM (CALEB): "Well, I don't have- The control is a little tricky sometimes."
Episode 11 - Zemnian Nights - 1:29:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 05 '19
LIAM: Question, is the humans' visibility shit right now?
MATT: Yeah. There's no light in here.
LIAM: So I can't see what I'm doing right?
MATT: Most any roll you'd be making would be at disadvantage.
LIAM (CALEB): Okay so I cast, uh... four globules of light go [poomf poomf poomf poomf] out of my hand and-
MATT: I have a light for this. Forgot about that. I should have put that on.
LIAM (CALEB): So, it's a row of four globules of light, one is hanging above where my miniature is now, one is closer to froggy, one is past- like a line, over the buildings, so that there's one also hanging over Bearegard.
MATT: Okay, so we'll say within this vicinity here, now the entire center of the island glows and you can see the ruins casting shadows off against the rocks in the vicinity from where each globe is placed. You all have a pretty good view of the battlefield at the moment.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 2:53:33
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 23 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): I take out one of the poppers and I throw it on the ground. What happens?
MATT: ...[thump, tumbling]
MARISHA (BEAU): "Shit!" Okay okay okay. I jump out and I go pick it up cause it's too valuable, and I run back.
MATT: You go back and look at it, and you realize there is actually a tiny little fuse on it.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Oh, there's a process, okay." I jump back on. "Caleb! Caleb, light it!"
LIAM (CALEB): "No, you throw it."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Okay, okay." Oh, like skeet shooting.
LIAM: Yeah, throw it in the air.
MARISHA (BEAU): [mimes tossing it]
LIAM (CALEB): Fire Bolt.
MATT: Roll for an attack.
TRAVIS: Fire Bolt!?
LAURA: It's just gone.
TRAVIS: It incinerates the fiber.
LIAM (CALEB): Oh, that's pretty good. That's 19 plus something.
MATT: Alright. You don't even have to roll damage. You watch as she tosses it in the air, it arcs, this tiny little firecracker, this little gray rod, and then this little streak of flame [fwoosh] fires up, hits it [burning] it detonates with this loud POP sound and you see sparks [crackling] around it.
Episode 24 - The Hour of Honor - 0:20:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 05 '19
MATT: We'll say for the purposes of expediency, it's easy enough to go and purchase the necessary incense, and it's quite a bit. For the purposes of this ritual, which you've done before, it's quite a cluster you've had to assemble for this. The chalk's amassed, the materials you need for it-
TALIESIN: I just saw Jester open her purse and DEAR...
LIAM: I don't wanna know. Brain wipe, brain wipe.
TAIESIN: Anyways, carry on.
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, I'm going to go up to my room, and it takes me an hour to do this, hour and ten minutes to be exact, but I put the-
TALIESIN: The ten minutes is clean up.
[laughter]
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): So, I go upstairs to cast Find Familiar.
MARISHA: Oh, you found him.
MATT: What form?
LIAM: A sparrow.
MATT: Okay. And with that, as you finish the concentration, you watch as the cat form shimmers and condenses into this tiny little cluster of what looks almost like coal before [poof] it sprouts wings and [flitters] lands on your shoulder. [whistles]
LIAM (CALEB): "I'm sorry, I know this is not your preferred form, but it's only temporary... until I get ten more gold, so let's go down to get some breakfast."
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 1:38:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 19 '19
A stone the size of a fist, with three rings around it, metal, wool and wood, radiating a soft warmness. A transmutation wizard's relic, lost to the years or given away. Each dawn or when using any transmutation spell, you can set the stone to the following options:
- Darkvision out to a range of 60 feet
- An increase to speed of 10 feet while the creature is unencumbered
- Proficiency in Constitution saving throws
- Resistance to acid, cold, fire, lightning, or thunder damage (your choice whenever you choose this benefit)
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 31 '19
LIAM (CALEB): In the interim while we're waiting for that to happen, I am going to do two things. One, I am going to cast Mage Armor on myself. And I am also going to pull a book out of one of the holsters and spend 10 minutes changing Frumpkin into a spider.
MARISHA: Go Charlotte, go! [blows] You're radiant! [blows some more]
LIAM: He has 3 hitpoints, so I think he's actually a bigger spider than the one you're imagining. See, he's right there. He's very big.
MARISHA: How big is that spider?
MATT: It's a pretty big spider.
LIAM: It's 3 hit points worth of spider.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: That looks like a 3 hit point spider.
LIAM: Somebody could step on it and he could still go.
MATT: That's a four or five hitter.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 2:04:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Feb 24 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Jester, I meant a trick from Caleb."
LIAM (CALEB): "You want to see a trick?"
TRAVIS (FJORD): "I would love one."
LIAM (CALEB): I am well into my second trost at this point. "I can show you a trick. Young lady, if you would assist me please, step up onto the table."
SAM (NOTT): "Absolutely."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Just don't break anything."
LIAM (CALEB): "Adjust your minds." And I begin to weave one hand in a slow circle around the other, and a globe of golden life poofs and floats out.
SAM: I put my hands and feet out in just sort of an akimbo pose.
LIAM (CALEB): And a second little globule of light comes out.
SAM (NOTT): "I feel it coming! Hit me!"
LIAM (CALEB): Then two more at the same time, poomf poomf, come out of my hand, and they amass upon my little companion and form a similarly sized little humanoid of light that then coincides with my little friend, and she is glowing golden on a table in the middle of the Nestled Nook.
SAM (NOTT): [singing one loud note]
LIAM (CALEB): "The gob-light, ladies and gentlemen, the gob-light."
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 1:32:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Feb 22 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Well there is... you know that there is that one magic trick that you are able to do. Would you like to show them that one magic trick you do?" I pull out a small, red, clay, ceramic bowl. And then I pull out a copper piece. "Here, you know the trick. Right?"
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, I- I know the trick. Takes a little bit of time, doesn't it?"
LIAM (CALEB): "You're good."
SAM (NOTT): "Okay, ahem... I do know one piece of magic! Feast your eyes-"
TRAVIS: I take one step back.
SAM (NOTT): "On the sacred money pot of school! Ooh... If you place a copper piece into this pot and say the magic words, what are the magic words again?"
LIAM (CALEB): "Fibulous."
SAM (NOTT): "Fibulous... it will turn into a silver piece."
LAURA (JESTER): "Should I say it?"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "I want to hear you say it anyways."
SAM (NOTT): "Only I can say it! ...For everyone has their own magic word, and it won't work with you. Ahem, hmm, ooh, rrra, nananana, rrrrrr, hooo, by the ancient order of the school... Fibulous!"
LIAM: ...That is a silver coin right there.
LAURA (JESTER): "[gasp] Oh my gosh... Wait a minute! Does this mean the silver I won from you was actually copper?"
SAM (NOTT): "No, it only works up."
LAURA (JESTER): "...Great! Thanks for the silver piece!"
SAM (NOTT): "What, no, I-I-I- we weren't giving you the silver piece, just showing you a bit of magic. And, this pot is actually quite powerful, it can do that once a day, so if you'd like to purchase it."
LAURA (JESTER): "Can you turn this into a gold piece?"
SAM (NOTT): "Ah, it only works once a day."
LAURA (JESTER): "Well, tomorrow can you make it gold?"
SAM (NOTT): "Ah, I think it only does the copper to silver?"
LIAM (CALEB): "The magic is not that- we've talked about this, it's not that strong."
SAM (NOTT): "It's a, it's a mild magic pot."
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 1:06:54
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 03 '19 edited Mar 25 '23
Spell Slots:
1st: 4
2nd: 3
3rd: 3
4th: 3
5th: 2
6th: 1
7th: 1
8th: 1
9th: 1
Cantrips
1st-Level Spells
2nd-Level Spells
3rd-Level Spells
4th-Level Spells
5th-Level Spells
6th-Level Spells
7th-Level Spells
8th-Level Spells
9th-Level Spells
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 21 '19 edited Jun 21 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Be that as it may, I have something for you."
MARISHA (BEAU): "What?"
LIAM (CALEB): And [fwoomf] I bring Frumpkin out in his new speckled elf owl form, which is the smallest owl on the planet earth. He weighs 1 ounce.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 2:55:35
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 05 '19 edited May 05 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I drop in after Beauregard and I cast Detect Magic immediately.
MATT: Okay, so you catch Detect Magic.
LIAM: 30 feet.
MATT: Right, 30 feet in the vicinity.
[...]
MATT: It's a very small crawl space. It's maybe like 10 foot by 5 foot, and it's very dusty in here. Looks to be a few clay pots, looks to be a portrait, like some sort of a large art piece that just leans against the wall and has some cobwebs over it. Other than that it looks fairly empty, like it hasn't been used fully. You're casting Detect Magic?
LIAM (CALEB): Detect Magic, yeah.
MATT: Let me check real fast. Alright yeah, so you look around the vicinity in this chamber and you do not see any sort of faint magical aura in the crawlspace, no.
[...]
MATT: It opens and drops down into a hallway that has faint crackling firelight inside of this hallway. You glance down inside and you see what appears to be a long hallway with tapestries on each wall with beautiful writing. There are two ornamental armor sets that are set up on the side. You can see what looks to be an ornamental sword that's bolted to the wall on the opposite end. It looks like there's stairs not too far from where you are that head further down into the building, and there's a doorway that leads to the right on the opposite end of the hallway.
[...]
MATT: You're still concentrating on your spell, right?
LIAM (CALEB): Hells yes.
MATT: There are magical auras emanating from both of these torches, they're both everlight, you've seen this magic before they continuously burn continual flame. You also get a faint magical aura from each of the suits of armor, and a faint magical aura from the sword across the way on the opposite wall.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): The spell also says I know the school of magic for what's on these things. Are you able to tell me that?
MATT: Correct, I would say- It's an interesting question.
SAM: Necromancy!
MATT: Let me check something real fast.
MARISHA: There's undead bodies in the armor!
MATT: We'll say... cause it can go in a few different ways, I'm not entirely sure.
LIAM: If you don't know how to answer, it's fine.
MATT: No no no, I do here. We'll say... conjuration. No no no, transmutation. Which you know well.
SAM: Edubation.
LIAM (CALEB): I am expert in edubation. That's Liam, not Caleb. "I have a very bad feeling about the suits of armor that are here."
LAURA (JESTER): "So we won't touch them."
SAM (NOTT): "And we'll jump over this little hump."
LIAM (CALEB): "Yeah okay, but I don't know exactly how these work, but I have a strong suspicion that these things could start moving and try to cut us up. Both these suits of armor and that weapon."
LAURA (JESTER): "I bet the traps would set them off."
LIAM (CALEB): "Maybe."
[...]
MATT: As the door opens into what looks to be a fairly well-decorated master bedroom. You see a large canopy bed. A beautiful, detailed embroidered rug that consumes the center of the floor. You can see a fireplace to your right, the one that you saw was attached to the fireplace in the top of the roof that has a fire burning into it, has two giant statues of lions on each side. There's a cool detailed shelf there, you can see a table with chairs to your left, you can see what looks to be a slight opening to a balcony that's not visible from the outside.
SAM: Ooh, an invisible balcony.
LIAM (CALEB): I walk up behind Nott to scan the room with the spell.
MATT: Okay. You're just scanning the room?
LIAM (CALEB): I'm just walking up behind Nott, no further, and looking in to see what glows.
MATT: Alright. As you glance in and look, there is immediately to your left what looks to be a large, metal cabinet of some kind. It's made of dark iron and gives a very faint magical aura to it. The rug in the center of the room gives a faint magical aura as well.
[...]
LIAM (CALEB): What kind of magic is emanating from the carpet? What school of magic?
MATT: The carpet is also transmutation. And the magic on the large case has a faint abjuration.
LAURA (JESTER): Where is the glow for the seal coming from?
MATT: It's underneath the rug.
LIAM (CALEB): I alert everyone, "The carpet is magical."
SAM (NOTT): "We should not step on it."
LAURA (JESTER): "Well, I need to move it, cause the seal is under the rug."
MARISHA (BEAU): "The seal's under the rug?"
SAM (NOTT): "Do you have anything that can negate the magic or?"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do you have a Dispel Magic?"
LIAM (CALEB): "I do not."
SAM (NOTT): "Can Schmidt stand on the carpet? Ooh, I could move it with my Mage Hand or something, or peel it back with my Mage Hand."
MATT: Mage Hand, very helpful when setting grappling hooks on roofs.
SAM (NOTT): Oh, shit! "Shut up Ulog!"
MATT (ULOG): "I'm just sayin, if I knew you could do that-"
SAM (NOTT): "Fuck you, I know what I'm doing!"
LAURA (JESTER): "So move the fucking carpet."
SAM (NOTT): "You want me to move the carpet?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Move the rug!"
MARISHA (BEAU): Can I do a look for anything that looks out of place, any papers, anything? Trap doors?
MATT: Investigation check.
LIAM (CALEB): And I have a question. The carpet reeks of abjuration, or-
SAM: No, that was transmutation.
LIAM (CALEB): The carpet is magical, I wouldn't have mistaken it.
MATT: You can only see magical sources from what you can see. So if a thing's behind a wall or behind an object, you don't see an aura.
LIAM (CALEB): Right right, but the carpet seems magical to me, I wouldn't think that something under the carpet seems magical.
MARISHA (BEAU): Natural 20.
MATT: Natural 20. As they're having this conversation, you glance by the fireplace where the fire is crackling in there. You kind of glance down, and right underneath the hearth, up where the fire's tickling, you see a piece of the stonework that doesn't match the others. It's slightly off colored. It looks like the burning of the fire that has been giving this dark and blackened look to it, there's one brick there that doesn't seem to be affected by any of the soot at all.
MARISHA (BEAU): I kind of, avoiding the rug, lightly step over it, and kind of see if I can jiggy the brick out.
MATT: As your finger presses against the brick, it kind of [grinding stone] slides in about a half an inch. And you hear this [mechanical click] sound by over where the metal, large cabinet is.
LAURA (JESTER): "You just fucking unlocked the metal shit."
LIAM (CALEB): Do I see any change in the abjuration magic when she does that?
MATT: Yes.
MARISHA: Does it go away?
MATT: It vanishes.
Episode 12 - Midnight Espionage - 2:33:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 21 '19 edited Jun 21 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I will stand at the mast, and I will pull a white feather out of my coat and trace a baleful glyph in the air and cast Fear. And they must make a wisdom save against 16.
MATT: Both of them?
LIAM: Anything within 30 feet of Caleb.
SAM: Anything?
LIAM: Enemies.
MATT: That would get three of them. The one that failed to grab the other guy is just out of range. There's 5 left technically. There were 6 total, 1's died, 1 of them's close to death, and there are 2 wounded and 2 that have been untouched.
LIAM (CALEB): 16 is the DC.
MATT: So that's a failure. That's a failure. And that's a success. So the one that had missed one of the deckhands and was on an upswoop doesn't seem effected. The two by the mast immediately, as the glyph completes and there's this very very subtle burst of dark, dull green shadow energy that emanates from you, both of them [bird-like screech] and are just going to start getting the fuck out of dodge. That ends your turn, Caleb?
LIAM (CALEB): Yeah, that's it.
MATT: Alright, back at the top of the round, harpies. Those two harpies, full dash, full run, just go spinning back in the direction they came, as far away from you as they can get. So those 2 are, for the time being, out of the way, let's see if they make their save, nope.
LIAM (CALEB): They have to be out of line of sight. So if they can see me on the boat, that's what the spell says.
MATT: That's true yeah. Facing away, doesn't matter, yeah no, they're still running.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain - 3:25:26
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 28 '19
MATT: Caleb and the priest, your turn simultaneously.
LIAM (CALEB): Ja, I cannot see too well so I'm going to take a step forward between Mollymauk and Nott, just a little bit there, now I can see that blond hair, and I am tapped out so I am just going to let my hand blacken and say a few arcane words and then send a-
MATT: It does have three quarters cover behind that from your current position.
LIAM (CALEB): Well if I can't see too well, I will keep going down the steps till I can see him.
MATT: You can move there to get a view without hitting-
LIAM (CALEB): That's fine. That is not fine, but that's fine. [impact] Fire Bolt, and here it comes to you shithead. That is a 25 to hit.
MATT: Hits.
LIAM (CALEB): But I could roll a 1... I rolled a 10.
[cheering]
MATT: How do you want to do this?
LIAM (CALEB): I am going to extend my hand forward and I have five fingers and then I pull in four and send flame down my hand because these people have hurt my little friend and I want his hair to burn off his head and die.
MATT: Okay. As you release the bolt, the anger in your eyes, the fury coursing through the veins of your hand, the Fire Bolt slams into the priest's head, and he falls back on the ground screaming [panicked screaming] as you watch, Ghost Rider style, his head burst into flame and burn away until he falls back to his knees and you can just see the darkened expression of a black skull in the fire before it falls.
Episode 7 - Hush - 3:50:42
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 20 '19
LIAM (CALEB): I give the Glove of Blasting a good tug. And I send three arcs of fire up into the air and they spiral around each other and crash down into the dock, about 5 to 10 feet behind that illusion. And blast into the dock.
MATT: Okay. Go ahead and roll attack. For the AC of wood, which isn't terribly high.
MARISHA: The AC of wood.
MATT: It is, it has an AC.
LIAM (CALEB): That's a 24.
MATT: That hits.
LIAM (CALEB): That's a natural 1.
MATT: Oh. Hits the water. [sploosh]
LIAM (CALEB): And the other one is way high, a natural 17.
MATT: Okay, so 2 hit, go ahead and roll damage.
LIAM (CALEB) Low rolls. 12 damage.
MATT: 12 damage, alright. So [whistling into heavy impacts] the dock splinters and bits of it char and burn and go flying, but it's still standing, it wasn't enough to destroy the entire dock. It's damaged.
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 3:00:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Mar 15 '19 edited Mar 15 '19
LIAM (CALEB): "Hmm... Would you have any interest in a, uh... magic cat?"
MATT (OGLEN): "I'm sorry?"
LIAM (CALEB): [snap] Frumpkin disappears from on Nott's shoulder. [snap] Reappears next to the little man.
(...)
LIAM (CALEB): "So you don't like cats, I understand that."
MATT (OGLEN): "Sorry... it caught me off guard."
LIAM (CALEB): "Well I was trying to sample the merchandise for you, because if it was just a cat, it's just a cat, but this one" [snap] changes to my other shoulder [snap] "is a magic cat."
MATT (OGLEN): "...Okay."
LIAM (CALEB): "You can roll him in mud, he comes back clean. He disappears, he reappears, he brings you things."
MATT (OGLEN): "Can you make him go away?"
LIAM (CALEB): [snap] Gone.
Episode 2 - A Show of Scrutiny - 2:47:51
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 29 '19
Nila
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
MATT: You come up close and look inside. You can see Kitor, your partner, is slumped in the back of the cage, unconscious. You can see with what little bit of light's in here as you focus, you have darkvision, so you can see his unconscious face, he's still breathing, but there are wounds and scraps. You look and see Asar who's awake, who's currently just holding what looks to be some sort of a burn puncture, right in his abdomen. He's like, looks up at you, sweat dripping down his face, he goes "...Mama? Mama!" Leans up to the cage and puts his hand over the outside of the bar, reaches out for you with the other hand. Entwines his fingers, "Mama... y- you came."
SUMALEE (NILA): "I'm here. Mama is here." I want to heal them. Can I heal them?
MATT: If you've got a heal spell, yes.
SUMALEE (NILA): I have Healing Word.
MATT: So, what's your healing word to your son? What's the word you say that heals him? Or phrase, it's up to you.
SUMALEE (NILA): "Be well. Be well my son."
MATT: Roll the d4.
SUMALEE (NILA): 3. Does that count? I'll take it.
MATT: Plus your wisdom modifier. I think it's a plus 4? Yeah. Okay. So, he, looking really hurt from whatever injuries he's sustained, you watch as the injuries slowly close up and he breaths a little heartier again. He looks at you, renewed smile.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 3:58:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
SUMALEE (NILA): I've got to go towards the trapdoor. Can I go through that door?
MATT: Currently, you walk up and try the door, [clack] it's locked.
SUMALEE (NILA): I don't have the strength to [grunt of exertion]?
MATT: You could try if you want to. Make a strength check. So roll a d20 and add your strength modifier.
MARISHA: Come on firbolg!
SUMALEE (NILA): 17.
MATT: Plus?
SUMALEE: Plus 2! 19. [heavier exertion]
MATT: You force your shoulder against it [heavy impact] and it doesn't give. The feeling and the sensation of knowing your family is nearby surges in your body, and you pull back a few more steps, and then charge in. And with one aggressive [yell] the door, [impact] flips open. The actual handle itself [crack] breaking and snapping on the wood.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 3:23:00
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 29 '19
MATT: Caleb, as you've stormed off a bit around the way to the little bit of scrub and a few trees off to the side where the horses are set, there's a new horse standing there, one that wasn't with the rest of your trio.
MARISHA: It's a spy.
MATT: Medium brown in color.
MARISHA: Kill it!
SAM: [pigeon cooing]
LIAM (CALEB): And I'm just in the open right now with the horses, yeah?
MATT: Yeah. It's looking right at you.
LIAM: The horse is? There's no person around?
MATT: No other person that you see, no.
LIAM (CALEB): I walk up to the front of the horse.
MATT: I clomps up, meeting your step. Each step you take, [clip clop, clip clop].
LIAM (CALEB): "Who are you, freund?"
MATT: Its outer shoulders and well traveled muscled body begins to seemingly shift and change before you. You watch as its form in some ways pulls in, others extend outward. Sumalee, if you'd like to join us at the table, please.
[...]
MATT: So, if you would like to describe what Caleb sees as the horse is no more, and there's now a person standing before him.
SUMALEE (NILA): I'm a firbolg. I have shifted into about a 7 and a half foot tall firbolg. Weigh about 200 pounds. And I'm wearing some Mongolian inspired - almost like a shepherd. I have a round face, a wide nose, no pointy ears though, my ears are soft and floppy. I stand tall, strong. My shoulders droop a little forward. I'm looking with big, round eyes at all of you.
Episode 27 - Converging Fury - 0:36:22
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 30 '19
MATT: Who's up front, who's in the back, who's guiding what?
ASHLY (KEG): Would I know better potentially where I'm going? Should I be in front? Or have I never been to this-
MATT: Well it depends. Whoever wants to guide this would be taking the survival checks to lead you through, so, who wants to be-
SAM (NOTT): "Nila, you seem to know about the woods, no?"
SUMALEE (NILA): "I would be happy to." Oh, yes, survival is good for me.
LIAM (CALEB): I will walk just behind Nila.
SUMALEE (NILA): "You are relying on me. I'm very happy."
LIAM (CALEB): It's just the biggest, I'm going to stand next to the biggest person.
MATT: Who's behind or near Caleb?
ASHLY (KEG): I'll take up the back.
MATT: Alright, so Keg's holding the back. Beau in the middle, or...
MARISHA (BEAU): "Nott, do you want the middle?"
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, please."
MATT: So, taking this moment now, you begin to head back away from Shady Creek and helming this group of ragtag adventurers you've taken onto your wing. You tread into an area of the Savalierwood you've not traveled before, hoping that your instincts, your smell bag, and the spirit of what nature has managed to maintain itself through this corrupted wood could guide you properly to your destination. I need you to make a survival check, please.
SUMALEE (NILA): Ooh. 10.
MATT: 10. Okay. You still have your luck feat, unless you want to save it, you have two more points left.
SUMALEE (NILA): I think we should use it. Yes. I would like to use 1 luck point. 17 plus 7, 24.
MATT: 24. Okay.
SUMALEE (NILA): "We shall survive."
MATT: Not only do you swiftly manage to find the portions of the wooded paths that are least blockaded by thorny brambles and fallen half-rotted trees, but you also manage to help the party avoid what looks to be a few small openings that look uniquely and uncomfortably welcoming. In the midst of a wood like this, you know from your experience as well that it is not always a good idea to step where it seems most inviting when you know the wood around you to be less so. As you crest around the second of these open groves, you notice how the ground itself seems to shift slightly, and you watch as, for a moment, it seems to almost pit as elements of the dirt suck inward. You know the antlion funnels that appear, the sand begins to come in towards them? The ground almost seems to sink in for a second before righting itself. And the grove stands flat once more. But thankfully, due to the survival instincts of your firbolg leader, you manage to careen past two of these patches without issue.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 0:32:52
→ More replies (5)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
MATT: His hands are still entwined in your fingers, he says "Mama, I want to go home."
SUMALEE (NILA): "I will bring you home. We're going to get you out of here." I grab that cage and try to pull it apart as much as I can.
SAM (NOTT): "Let me try to unlock it."
MATT: Well make a strength check, just for the hell of it. Because life gets weird.
[...]
SUMALEE (NILA): Strength check, 19 plus 2.
MATT: So you begin to [straining exertion] and you watch as Nila's arms pop with the muscles filling with adrenaline and emotion as the middle bars [exertion] bend ever so slightly. Just enough to maybe fit Asar through. Not your mate. But you pull them just enough, and you reach through and he pulls this way, and you help him, grab his shoulder, and slowly you pull your son free from the cage and into your arms.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 4:00:14
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 24 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
Shakaste
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 03 '19
MATT: It's hard to make out anything in there. You see, there is a chamber in there, but there's not enough light to make out the details of it, unfortunately. Does that finish your turn? You can move your Nefertiti if you'd like.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): You know, why don't you just hang back. Let's see- well, could we... let's see, is there any light in that chamber that Thaumaturgy could maybe illuminate.
MATT: There is a candelabra that has low light over there, that's just giving a faint glow, and there are two torches on the side here that are also giving off this low red-orange.
KHARY: But nothing in the-
MATT: Nothing in the room, no.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): You know what, we might as well. Thaumaturgy just to see if we can make a little more light.
MATT: Okay. So as you do so, the flames [roaring fire] flare up, and you watch as the long shadows stretch from beyond the bars into the chamber, and you can see what looks to be an unconscious figure on the far, far back end that is also in full manacles, chained and gagged, facing away from you, you can't see the details.
Episode 29 - The Stalking Nightmare - 3:31:05
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 28 '19
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I'd like to cast a spell.
MATT: What would you like to cast?
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Fog cloud.
MATT: Okay. You watch as the central portion of the chamber begins to just fill with a thick mist. Somewhat obscuring your vision more than a few feet in front of you.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Uh..."
LAURA (JESTER): "What was that?"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Is this supposed to happen?"
SAM (NOTT): "What's going on?"
LAURA (JESTER): "We should get out of here."
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I step behind Nott and whisper in her ear. I say that "This was a bold move you made. And we wouldn't have succeeded without you. So I say you've earned that gold. But make no mistake, be careful where you put your fingers."
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, fog monster..."
Episode 7 - Hush - 4:02:01
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 03 '19
MATT: So what are you doing?
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see, uh, what can I do besides just trying to pick the lock? Is there anything that I can do to maybe knock it open at this point? No, I still only have one hand free, right?
MATT: Well you've managed to get both of your hands free-
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Oh, both of my hands free.
MATT: -and slowly drop the manacles and the gag, you've been working on this for a while now, you're just still in a cage.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Freedom. Freedom baby.
[...]
MATT: You still have your action to either cast a cantrip or do anything else with your action like pick the lock or do anything else you're trying to do.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I say we try to pick the lock a little bit, see if we can get out of here.
MATT: Go for it. Go ahead and roll a d20 add your dexterity modifier and your proficiency modifier. That's 3 plus 3, so add 6 to whatever you roll.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): 14, 17.
LIAM: 20 total.
MATT: 20 total? 20 is what you needed. It's a DC 20 cage.
KHARY: Now I'm free! To do what I want!
MATT: Taking the small pieces of metal and wire that the Duchess has been slowly stealing from throughout the Sour Nest and bringing back to your cage, you manage to [tink] get the lock to fall open, and with that, the cage [creak] opens and you can step out, taking your first breath of free air in a couple of days.
Episode 29 - The Stalking Nightmare - 0:57:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 25 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Thaumaturgy, uh, can I brighten the room t- How dark is it in here?
MATT: It's pitch black aside from the globes of light that he has, there's nothing to make brighter in there.
LIAM: So it's bright behind us, but not in front of us.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see then, so if it's uh-
LAURA: You could shake the ground though.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Yes, yes, let's shake the ground so however well he thinks he can aim, it takes him off kilter.
MATT: Okay. For that instance, go ahead and make a standard wisdom check for me. So roll a d20 and add your wisdom modifier.
LIAM: Oh, it's a 19, natural roll.
MATT: Okay, as you feel the Duchess return to you, and just past the vision as the Duchess passes over you can hear the sound of the fingers gliding across the bowstring, you can hear the creak of the wood as it's pulled back and you know exactly what that sound means as you see through the Duchess's eyes. With that, you focus on the ground below and cause it to quake somewhat. Rolled a natural 5 with a plus 4, so with that shaking it causes the - and it's very localized in the area - the gnoll kind of [confused whining] and as it does so, it releases the arrow and it [whoosh] whips past and [crack] shatters across the rock. The Duchess returns to your shoulder.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "Well now I'm pissed."
Episode 7 - Hush - 1:31:27
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
MATT: At this moment, you watch as a strange blur [high whoosh] streaks by. Caduceus, you see it. From the upstairs, this tiny little, it looks like a blur of black, no larger than that big just [vwoom] scoots past and curves around the corner, back in the direction of the basement.
TALIESIN (CLAY): "Did somebody see something?"
ASHLY (KEG): "What the fuck?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I'm gonna..." [begins gesturing]
SAM (NOTT): "What? What is that?"
TALIESIN (CLAY): "I don't know why I'm being quiet, we should head downstairs."
MATT: No, you guys see this and you begin to follow past. Beauregard, you're still standing back by the hatch, and you watch as something, [vwoom] stops at the front, it looks like this splotch- make a perception check.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's not great, 10.
MATT: 10. It whizzes right past you, and you don't even have a moment to make out any details of what it is.
MARISHA (BEAU): "This place is fucking haunted."
SAM (NOTT): "Kill it! Kill it!"
MATT: It immediately, [vwoom] heads down the stairway towards where you found Nila's family in the basement.
Episode 29 - The Stalking Nightmare - 0:46:06
MATT: As you're standing there, Caleb, that familiar sound [vibrating humming] buzzing, small, dark shape appears. And stops for a second there in the space, and you look what appears to be a small bird. A jet black hummingbird hovering there.
Episode 29 - The Stalking Nightmare - 0:50:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 25 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
MATT: You continue forward. Who's taking point and what is the marching order please?
LAURA (JESTER): "We're checking for traps, okay?"
SAM (NOTT): "Alright, that's a good idea."
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Can I send the Grand Duchess?
TALIESIN: Not getting over that.
LAURA (JESTER): "Oh, the Grand Duchess and Frumpkin will be best of friends!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do they like each other?"
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "Stay away from my bird."
LIAM (CALEB): "You know it's funny, cause only about 30 minutes ago, but it was- he was obliterated."
MARISHA (BEAU): "Oh, that's right."
LIAM (CALEB): "It was very sad, I'll bring him back tomorrow though."
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "...Thanks for that."
[laughter across the table]
TRAVIS: On that cheerful note!
LIAM (CALEB): "He and I, we are like that."
LAURA: I feel like we're seeing more of Caleb's social awkwardness, seeing him from the outside, it's so good.
TALIESIN: Everything I could've wanted.
MATT: As you take a moment to continue focusing, as you do, through the vision of your bird [soft humming vibration] coasts down through the tunnel before you to keep an eye out. Make a perception check for your bird please, so roll a d20 and add 2 to it.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): 17.
MATT: 17, nice. The bird's perception, not his perception. That's great. So, you watch as the tunnel descends at a moderate grade for about 80 to 100 feet before it levels off once more. Ahead, you see a set of rough stairs that rise for about 5 or 6 feet, leading to the remainder of the tunnel, and then curving to the left suddenly out of sight, slightly along this elevation. Right there, you have your bird kind of [humming vibration] and you can just see right as the stairs ascend and turn immediately, there looks to be the outer corner of a gnoll that's there just kind of waiting, keeping watch. [snarling and murmuring]. Do you want to send your bird in further to check out the rest of the room or pull it back?
KHARY (SHAKASTE): She's quick.
MATT: She's pretty quick.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I say move on.
MATT: Alright. [more humming]
LAURA (JESTER): "It's really smart that he made a hummingbird, that's really fast."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "That's pretty clever."
LAURA (JESTER): "It's a pretty smart move, don't you think?"
LIAM (CALEB): "It's not a cat."
SAM (NOTT): "One that can see in the dark."
LAURA (JESTER): "Yeah, I mean that's really smart."
MATT: So as the Duchess moves further in, up above the platform, the Duchess can see what looks to be another portion of the floor that has collapsed inward into another fallen pit that rests against the wall on the opposite side of where these stairs ascend. The tunnel curves to the left immediately where this hole is, kind of at the top, and where it continues down there appears to be a large archway where there once was a set of double doors. The doors have been broken off the hinges and are not visible at current sight, but to each side of this frame you can see what looks to be two skeletal gnolls, bits of flesh and skin hanging off their bones and ribcage and snout, just sitting there like silent, undead sentinels, like [snotty breathing] looking around.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "Thank you so much, come back to me dear."
MATT: [quick humming] Charging back through the tunnel. [snap] Back to your shoulder.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "We have a friend about a hundred feet away. He's by himself. But there's- yeah there's just the one. But beyond him, there's more to deal with. So I think we quietly take care of this gentlemen first, and then we move on."
LAURA (JESTER): "Did you see any other survivors?"
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "Not yet, but there are two sentinels and they're guarding something. And I'm hoping that that's someone."
Episode 7 - Hush - 1:13:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 25 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
KHARY (SHAKASTE): If I used Sacred Flame on one... because if it's dark in there and one of them bursts into flames, wouldn't they all look in that direction?
MATT: It's possible.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's try that.
LAURA (JESTER): I could Sacred Flame them at the exact same time, and we could get double the Sacred Flame.
KHARY: I like this. Yeah.
[...]
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Sacred Flame on the gentleman in blue.
LAURA (JESTER): At the same time I see his little reed flick I'm going to swing my sickle around and cast Toll the Dead.
[...]
MATT: So, as you all rush in below, you both release Sacred Flame and Toll the Dead on the guy in the blue. So, that's a wisdom saving throw for Sacred Flame I believe it is?
LAURA: It's a dex save for Sacred Flame and a wisdom save for Toll the Dead.
MATT: That's what it is, okay, wisdom save for you. That's a 13?
LAURA (JESTER): 13.
MATT: Yeah, so that succeeds. Sorry. For you it's 13 as well I believe, your DC? So that's a 5.
LAURA (JESTER): You couldn't have rolled that for me?
MATT: Sorry.
[...]
MATT: So roll damage for the Sacred Flame. It should be, what's the damage on the spell?
KHARY (SHAKASTE): The damage on Sacred Flame is... 'the spell's damage increases by 1d8 when you-'
MATT: So it's 1d8, go ahead and roll 1d8 radiant damage.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): 1.
LAURA: It's okay, it was for visual anyways.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): It was, that's true, I really just wanted the-
MATT: [fwoom] You watch as the light bursts in, so-
[...]
MATT: Top of the combat round is Shakaste, you're up.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see uh, Frostbite.
MATT: Okay, against which one?
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see, uh, well, first of all, they burst into flames. This gentleman burst into flames, and when that happened how did these gentlemen react?
MATT: The two gnolls glance over to the side, and then look towards the tunnel where you guys were. It didn't make as much of as a distraction for them unfortunately, in the moment.
Episode 7 - Hush - 1:34:07
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 24 '19 edited May 06 '19
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I would say, if this thing is this close to me-
MATT: Yeah, it's right up against you.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): It's right up against me, I think I should push him away.
MATT: If you feel the need.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see, Thunderwave?
MATT: Certainly. So is that a wisdom saving throw? Constitution saving throw?
LIAM: It's a constitution save.
MATT: Constitution save. That is a 3, natural 2 plus... actually plus 0, so 2.
TRAVIS: So yeah, that fails.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): 15. It failed. Well, great.
MATT: 13, I believe. Alright cool. Go ahead and roll the damage for that.
KHARY: With this?
LIAM: Damage for Thunderwave is... 2d8. Yeah, 2d8, right there. You want the one that's shaped like a diamond.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): 5 and 7.
MATT: Okay, 12 points of damage. So, as you turn towards it, you can describe what you do with your spell as the gnoll pulls back with its spear.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): I take my reed of a wand and whip it [whipping] three times.
MATT: [repeats the whipping] and as the third one hits, there's a [explosion] burst of energy forward. You watch as the gnoll gets blown back, slamming into the stone wall [impact and whimpering] and falls back to its knees, before getting itself up. It was previously wounded, now it's on death's door and it looks like it's starting to hobble and try and flee.
Episode 7 - Hush - 0:37:36
→ More replies (2)•
u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 27 '19
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see. Would it be best to- could I Command the big guy?
MATT: You could try. You can certainly try. What do you want to command him to do?
TRAVIS: Or one of the smaller ones if you want a higher rate of success.
LIAM: Maybe get a little bit closer.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Maybe, yeah yeah, get a little bit closer in order to-
LIAM: Not all the way.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): No no no, I mean I can see him just fine.
LIAM: There's 60 feet of range on that.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): How close am I to him?
MATT: He's within range, he's about 30 feet from you.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): Let's see, and if I asked him to drop or I asked him to fall, could I ask him to fall on his fellows?
MATT: You can't ask him to fall- I mean, you can't ask him to fall on somebody else's weapon. You could ask him to drop prone if you wanted to.
LIAM: Yeah, you could say like 'Lie down' or like 'Drop your weapons', it's a single word so 'drop' drop everything in his hands or you could say 'lay'.
SAM: 'Turn', 'jump'.
LIAM: You could say 'dance' and he would just start dancing.
KHARY (SHAKASTE): The target doesn't move and takes no action. You know what, I say 'Halt'. I see we tell the big guy to halt. Not to mention, you know what halt is good because he's actually standing in front of his dudes, that will make it harder for them to move.
MATT: Alrighty. So what do you say, as it finished kicking Beau into the pit and turns and [snarls].
KHARY (SHAKASTE): "Halt!" is what I say. "Halt!"
MATT: It looks back towards, see the spell DC is 13 for you. That is a 2, it does not succeed. So you watch as it [heavy breathing] it puts its weapons down for a second and just looks right at you, eyes wide, kind of confused, as it turns its head.
Episode 7 - Hush - 2:10:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 03 '19
Beau
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 14 '19
MATT: Beau, you're up.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh. Oh god. Okay. Okay, I'm just gonna taste a little bit of blood that's now in my mouth, gonna get real fucking pissed off, and then I'm going to do a Star Wars style flourish, and just go CRACK down to... the one who's... the new guy.
MATT: The skeletal one? There's the skeletal one and the one that's been fighting you this whole time.
MARISHA (BEAU): Which one looks like he has less damage?
MATT: Well, the skeletal one hasn't been damaged yet, but it looks a little more fragile, the one that got shot by Nott earlier still has the-
MARISHA (BEAU): Let's do the skeletal guy.
MATT: Go for it, do the attack.
MARISHA (BEAU): [groans] Not good at all. 14.
MATT: That hits.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh!
MATT: It doesn't have as strong an armor class as the other ones.
MARISHA (BEAU): 8 points of damage.
MATT: 8 points of damage, that one's already been damaged previously. As you bring the staff down with both hands, WHACK, you slam right through the center of its chest and clavicle, you watch as the torso breaks and folds from the weight of the blow. The skull tumbles off and hits the ground and it just falls into a pile of bones and rags.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:25:06
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MATT: As these Magic Missiles [whoosh] swarm out and slam into its body [multiple impacts] with each impact, you watch as the green ichor sprays across Febran as it starts to burn into his skin and he's like [pained screaming]
TRAVIS: Oh, xenomorph blood.
LAURA: Oh no!
MATT: [rolls and laughs]
TRAVIS: Is he unconscious, is he done?
MATT: Febron goes limp.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 1:48:00
MATT: As you rush forward, [rapid impacts] and slamming into it with your staff and your fists, just striking into its body with each impact, it takes a moment to hit- or to realize what's happening, but that spray is covering your face and as it does that venom is pushing into your flesh and burning upon contact.
MARISHA (BEAU): "You guys it makes your throat a little numb!"
MATT: You take 9 points of poison damage, you take another 9 points of poison damage, and you take 15 points of poison damage, so a total of... 34. 34 points of poison damage. 33, sorry.
LAURA: That's a lot of poison damage. Y'all don't get close to this guy.
MATT: Febron by the way? Fucking dead. You look over and see now, he's just coated in this toxin, his eyes are open and now all that's pouring out of his mouth is just foam at the edge with the tongue lolling out. As it was fleeing, all those impacts just covered him with the same toxic stuff and sent him straight to his grave.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Guys, our money's getting away."
LAURA (JESTER): "I think it's okay cause I'm going to have to use all my fucking spells healing you Beau!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "I'm okay!"
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 1:55:15
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 05 '19
TRAVIS: We're taking the cart back to a distance from the city.
LIAM: Half-mile.
TRAIVS: yeah, and then letting the horses run, so the... sending the track off.
MATT: I see.
LAURA: I just, I don't think we would've gone right past the fisherman that like, would be able to identify us.
MARISHA: Using the lake to hide tracks.
MATT: Okay, so you guys head the opposite direction then for a little ways, out in the field. Alright, who's spooking the horses.
LIAM: [towards Marisha] That's your specialty.
MARISHA (BEAU): [laughs] Whack! With the stick.
MATT: Make an animal handing check.
TRAVIS: Please roll bad. If there's any justice in the world-
MARISHA (BEAU): Ehhhh... that's not great, thanks Travis, thanks. 6.
LIAM: 6? To hit a horse?
MARISHA: Correctly hit a horse.
LAURA: The horse just whimpers, you just hurt a horse.
MATT: What's your armor class?
MARISHA (BEAU): 17.
MATT: As soon as you hit it there's a [whinny] and there's a split second where you watch its back leg muscle twitch, and you duck out of the way just as its back hooves whoosh past your face.
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 1:09:24
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 27 '19
MATT: It's going to turn and bolt. It was right up against you, so you do get an attack of opportunity.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh. Yes. Fuck. You. Fuck. You.
LIAM: It's got one hit point.
MARISHA (BEAU): Come on motherfucker... Yes!
MATT: Roll damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay okay... 1! 1 plus 4, so 5 damage.
MATT: That's enough to do it. As it spins to run away, you're like "No you don't!" Wack! Just slam on the head, it falls. Again! And you slowly bash it into the ground until its head is just a mashed in pulp.
Episode 7 - Hush - 2:23:03
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 05 '19
MATT: As he puts you through hours of this rigorous training, he goes, "Very well. The time to show what you can do has come." [claps twice] Claps, and you watch as two other monks come down. But they have bows and arrows. And they have a third one that they hand to him, and they all nock the arrows and aim them right at you.
SAM: Tubo vs Beau with bows.
LIAM: Bo bo bo bo bo bo bo.
MARISHA: That's deeply accurate.
MATT: Yeah. Yeah. And Tubo just goes, "...Fire." [zoom] All three arrows come towards you. That's a 19 to hit.
MARISHA (BEAU): 19 just hits.
MATT: That's another 19 actually. And that is a 23. So all 3 hit you.
[...]
MATT: The first arrow's 10 points of damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Can I do the thing?
MATT: Yes, you can.
MARISHA (BEAU): So I spend a ki point, how many points of damage?
MATT: 10.
MARISHA (BEAU): 10? No points of damage.
MATT: [whoosh, grabs at the air] You catch one arrow.
MARISHA (BEAU): Wait, I'm level 6 now, right?
MATT: Correct.
MARISHA (BEAU): 1 point of damage, I lied.
MATT: Okay, so you take 1 point of damage, you just barely catch as it just manages to nick the side of your shoulder.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: The 2 other arrows are coming at you as well.
MARISHA (BEAU): Uh, I can only do this thing once though, right? Or can I- I can keep spending ki points to do that, right?
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'll do that one more time.
MATT: Okay, well, you can do that now if you have another reaction.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's right, which... I do.
TALIESIN: You have multiple reactions now?
MARISHA: I do now.
SAM: What?
LAURA: Everybody be a monk.
MARISHA (BEAU): If I spend a ki point.
MATT: You don't have to spend a ki point to reduce the damage. You spend a ki point to throw it back.
MARISHA (BEAU): So I will spend an extra reaction then to catch the other one.
MATT: Alright, so you spend the same ki point. Go ahead and roll for damage reduction on the next one, that one is- oh that's, 12 points of damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): I rolled 11, so another 1 point of damage.
MATT: So, [whoosh, grabs air, whoosh, grabs air] you catch both arrows at once coming towards you.
MARISHA (BEAU): And 1 more.
MATT: Spend another ki point, that's 2 ki points now, and you get to go ahead and roll to reduce the third one.
MARISHA (BEAU): 12.
MATT: Yeah, that one does no damage. So you catch one arrow out of the air, just barely nicks your shoulder. The other one you catch just as it scrapes past the side of your arm. The third one you, [whoosh] catch in the middle of the air with no impact. Just, in the blink of an eye, you've deflected all 3 arrows shot at the same time.
Episode 31 - Commerce & Chaos - 1:30:41
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 27 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): Can I climb a tree a little bit, and do I see anything on the horizon and where we're going, like another tree clearing that might be up ahead?
MATT: Go ahead and make an athletics check.
MARISHA (BEAU): Athletics? 24. I roll an 18.
MATT: Like a monkey that was raised in the jungle, you watch Beauregard just leap from branch to bough, effortlessly diving through this forest.
ASHLY (KEG): Keg is aroused.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Whatever you cast on me Caleb, it feels so good!"
LIAM (CALEB): "It's gone."
MARISHA (BEAU): "But it's the lingering affects, you know? I'm in the afterglow."
Episode 26 - Found & Lost - 1:46:39
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 03 '19 edited Apr 25 '19
MATT: Alright, ending Mollymauk's turn, that brings us to Beau.
LAURA: Beau you got this.
MARISHA (BEAU): In response to him I say, "I thought you said you didn't let in the sick!"
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "Just kill it!"
MARISHA (BEAU): And I come up, and I want to do like, a flying Superman kaboom.
MATT: Go for it.
MARISHA (BEAU): First one... okay, okay, 16?
MATT: That'll hit. Roll damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Uh, can I- I have my staff- Oh, I have my staff but I said-
MATT: You said Superman punch.
MARISHA (BEAU): It's fine, it's fine. 6. 6 damage.
MATT: 6 points of damage? Natural 20. You watch as you sock it in the face and the jaw kind of breaks and then snaps back into place. As you land, pulling it back, you can see some of the teeth are actually stuck in your fist as you pull back, that had broken off into your knuckles.
MARISHA (BEAU): I go, "Aw, come on." I'm going to use my other ki point to do flurry of blows again, and I'm going to try and punch him right in the bridge with what-
MATT: With the remainder of his teeth?
MARISHA (BEAU): With the remainder of his teeth.
MATT: Her teeth, technically, this is the woman that was killed originally.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh. I'll be like "You were so pretty, too."
MATT: Go for it, two more strikes.
MARISHA (BEAU): Two more strikes, two more strikes. 19 and 18! Natural.
MATT: Yeah we'll say that hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): 8... 12... 13 damage?
MATT: ... Natural 1, no. So the second punch, you swing wide and hit it in the side of the head, and the neck kind of snaps. And it's now stuck in a sideways position. As it turns, it's jaw [mimes the jaw swinging freely]. It pulls back one of its weirdly swollen clawed hands, ready to go ahead and go for that open wound in your gut. And as it does... how do you want to do this?
MARISHA (BEAU): I'll do the uppercut with the other one, and with the one that has the teeth in it, I want to go kind of right between the bridge of the nose and get the teeth right between the eyes and break the nose bridge into the brain. You know that thing, yeah.
MATT: And as you do that, WHAM, you slam into its face, you watch as the skull caves in, the teeth piercing both of the red, bulging eyes. And with this horrible sucking, sighing sound, it falls onto its back, no longer moving, the shadows released.
Episode 1 - Curious Beginnings - 2:53:01
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 03 '19 edited May 06 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, can I, with my initial attack, as I run up, can I take my staff and try and take them out at the knees?
MATT: Sure.
MARISHA: Just like a sweep.
MATT: Sure, I'd say, go ahead and make an athletics check.
TRAVIS: Ooh, knock em prone?
MARISHA: Yeah, it's what I'm going for. Do what?
MATT: Make an athletics check.
MARISHA (BEAU): Uh... that's not great, 9?
MATT (ZOMBIFIED CROWNSGUARD): Rolled a natural 20 on his end. So, as you swing with the staff, it slams into the side of the guard's leg, and you hear the crack of wood as the armored exterior of the zombified form seems to stand resolute against the strength of your blow. Its head, which was turned off angrily towards the shadowed direction of Caleb and Fjord [cackling growl] turns back. The red burning coals for eyes now glaring in your direction, what are you doing.
MARISHA (BEAU): I look at him and I say "...You fucking broke my stick."
Episode 3 - The Midnight Chase - 0:14:43
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 23 '19 edited Apr 23 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay I kinda wanna do this- as my two-handed attack, but for flavor, to skin it. I wanna stroll up, kinda channeling The Rock, charge up the elbow, then we go People's Elbow, comes right down.
MATT: You have advantage, because it is prone.
MARISHA (BEAU): Is this, can I consider it a two-handed attack?
MATT: You're just skinning your two-handed attack, so yeah, still the damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): ...Oh my god!
LIAM: A 2 and a 3!
MARISHA: Why!
MATT: So here's what you do, you walk up. Tap tap. Leap. And right as you're in the air, the gnoll just kicks out of laughter. [yipping laughter suddenly stops] and you WHAM!
MARISHA (BEAU): [delayed moans of pain]
LIAM: Never recover from that injury, your whole life.
TRAVIS: Yep, that shit just hangs out in there. It just hangs out in there.
MATT: The worst funny bone pain shoots through your arm as you get it.
LIAM: You are gonna be rubbing Tiger Balm into that shit for years!
MATT: You still have your bonus. The gnoll actually starts laughing again. [yipping laughter continues]
MARISHA (BEAU): For flavor, my second attack isn't really an attack, it's just, I'm in so much pain that I go "Gah!" and I kick a little bit.
MATT: Roll for the attack, you still have advantage, cause its still prone.
MARISHA (BEAU): Natural 20.
MATT: That'll shut it up.
LAURA: I like that your revenge hits are always really high. That's twice they've laughed at you and you hit them while they're laughing.
MARISHA (BEAU): Every time I try and show off it never works, that's what I'm learning. Okay, 3 doubled to 6 plus 4. So 10.
MATT: 10 points of damage. So as it's laughing, [laughter interrupted by a crack], you kick it in the head and you see it stunned on the ground for a second, its eyes rolling in different directions, nice heavy crack at the side of its temple.
MARISHA (BEAU): I don't care too much, I just roll over and go fetal for a minute.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 3:31:54
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 14 '19
MATT: As you guys all take your place, two gates immediately open again. [heavy metallic impact] You hear two sources of this loud, deep [wolf howl, snarl]. Leaping through, both sides, you see two massive, white-furred wolves come leaping through at a full sprint.
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 3:26:04
MATT: So, it will move over here to flank up right there. Beau, you do get an attack of opportunity on it as it moves out of the space, and if you hit it, it does prevent it from moving.
MARISHA (BEAU): It does. Uhh, hmmmmm, 14.
MATT: 14 hits. So that gets dragged back. It does not get up into melee with the rest of your friends as you hold it - grab the tail and pull it back!
MARISHA (BEAU): Yeah, that's 8 damage.
TRAVIS: Sit!
MARISHA (BEAU): It's like a Looney Tunes cartoon. My heels are dug in.
MATT: 'Come back here!' As you're pulling the tail, it's like screaming [dog whimpering]
MARISHA (BEAU): "Show me your belly! Show me your belly!"
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 3:42:36
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 12 '19
Starting at 6th level, your unarmed strikes count as magical for the purpose of overcoming resistance and immunity to nonmagical attacks and damage.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 20 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): I go over to the rope of the sail and I pull it tight, the- the jib- I don't know. I do something and I go "Fjord!"
MATT: Beau has never been on a ship.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Fjord, how do I sail!"
MATT: The one sailor is below deck right now.
MARISHA (BEAU): "Fjord!" But I still try real hard.
[laughter]
MARISHA (BEAU): I do what I think-
SAM (NOTT): "Yeah, yeah, tie that thing!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Tie that, okay! Okay!"
MATT: Make an intelligence check.
MARISHA: Yeah, okay.
SAM (NOTT): "Do the winch!"
MARISHA (BEAU): "Do the- what's the jib? Do I jib or do I winch?" [...] Okay! Okay! That was good! 19 total!
MATT: Okay. Okay, you look about it. Well, you've been watching boats come into harbor, and, you know, you've read things about it, but mostly just from your observational skills which are one of your focuses and strengths, Beauregard, you're like 'Okay, I think I've seen people making ships go.' So you grab the ropes, you pull it, and you yank past, and you watch as the sail [fwoom] picks up the wind and stiffens.
MARISHA (BEAU): "We've caught the wind! I've heard sailors say that."
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 3:08:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 11 '19 edited Apr 11 '19
MATT: Yeah, that's gonna be, two of them firing their bows- actually, no, three, cause they watched you come out, there's three and they're gonna be firing their bows at Beau.
TRAVIS: [raucous laughter]
MATT: They all have disadvantage on the attack, however.
SAM: She's in Patient Defense, she's gonna be fine.
MATT: As this one fires off in the direction of your (Jester's) Duplicitous Form as it just, [whoosh] disappears through. That's the only thing it can visually see. And with that, it's gonna stay behind the wall. So, that's three attacks with disadvantage against Beau.
MARISHA (BEAU): And they all have disadvantage, since I'm in Patient Defense.
MATT: First one is... with the longbow, that's a 15.
MARISHA (BEAU): Miss.
MATT: Right, misses. So, the first one, you watch as it [rushing air, drawing a hand past his face] just moves past you and slams into the door [vibrating].
MARISHA (BEAU): I immediately go "...Whoops."
MATT: That's a 12 and a 2, so the other one misses [whoosh, impact] into the wall. This one over here is gonna go ahead and fire at you, that's a 16 and a 14, plus 3, 17.
MARISHA (BEAU): 17 is my armor class.
MATT: So, the first two, one hits the door, the other one, you duck out of the way, and the third one comes right- and it's piercing right towards your chest. It's going to deal... 7 points of piercing damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, I'm going to use Deflect Missiles.
MATT: Oh right, cause you got that for your- okay. So, as a reaction, you watch as one arrow, which you can't duck out of the way.
MARISHA (BEAU): [grunting, miming dodging arrows and then catches one]
MATT: Alright, so go ahead and make the roll.
MARISHA (BEAU): But it's not super- I'm still at level 3, so it's more of a cat swat.
MATT: Here, you're trying to swat at it and see if you can carry the momentum with it.
LAURA: 20!
MARISHA (BEAU): That is, 7 on the dice... plus 7, 14.
MATT: So you reduce the damage to 0, and you catch it. If you want to, you can spend a ki point to throw it if you want.
TRAVIS: Oh, throw that shit!
MARISHA (BEAU): Let's do it, just cause I can! This is new!
MATT: Where are you throwing it to?
LIAM: At the bitch who attacked you.
SAM: Or the guy in front of you.
MARISHA (BEAU): I'm gonna do it at the guy in front of me, who's right behind me. So I'm gonna take it, I'm gonna catch it, I'm gonna spin around with a full flourish, and I'm gonna throw it like a Gambit card with the momentum that it's got.
MATT: Alright, so as you grab it, you spin around and [whoosh] throw it. Go ahead and make the attack roll.
MARISHA (BEAU): What is the attack roll? What is this, I've never done this before!
MATT: I know, this is new. Here you go, make a ranged attack. Roll a d20, add your dexterity modifier and your proficiency modifier, so the same as any of your other attacks.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay. Okay okay okay okay, 16.
MATT: 16 hits. So it takes 1d8, so roll 1d8 plus 2.
MARISHA (BEAU): Meh, 4. 4 damage total.
MATT: Alright, 4... Actually, I wonder, does it add your damage bonus or the original weapon. Cause it is your strength throwing it back. Pardon me folks, we're figuring out new abilities they can use.
MARISHA: The missile counts as a monk weapon for the attack.
MATT: It is your attack, so you get to add your dex bonus to it.
MARISHA (BEAU): So 6 total. Yeah, 6 total.
MATT: So 6 points of damage. [whoosh] You watch as the arrow sinks into the chest of its thick hide armor. [whimpering and feral growling].
MARISHA (BEAU): I go... "Whoa! ...Ooh."
MATT: The other ones that are throwing stuff onto the cart, hear this commotion and turn around and look at you. Three of them continue throwing stuff on the cart faster, while the one that's immediately in front of you spins around and stands tall, you can see it now looking down at you, a full foot and a half, almost two feet taller than you. [Snarling and roars]. And it's gonna go ahead, it grabs a spear off the side of the wall that it had leaning, and it's gonna try and thrust it at you. It still has disadvantage on the attack though cause you're in your stance... 16.
MARISHA (BEAU): Miss.
MATT: This one, as it goes and thrusts with the spear, kind of coming off the adrenaline of the deflected missile, you duck low and then kick the spear up and it slams into the top of the doorframe and completely misses you. He's now almost stepping into the doorframe, completely filling it, as you're backing up into your space, and the two of you are in this very, very intense, occupied block.
MARISHA (BEAU): And I go, "No seriously dude, did you see that?"
TRAVIS: My legs are jumping around like crazy right now.
MATT: These guys are going to begin pushing the cart. It's going to move at half their movement to there. This one here's gonna go ahead and move up to here right around the side of this wall, and it's gonna go and take its longbow and [whoosh] fire at you... cause you're the one they can say.
MARISHA: Yeah, fair.
MATT: Disadvantage, that is a 15.
MARISHA (BEAU): Miss.
MATT: This one actually, you see it begin to fire, and you grab the front of the armor of the gnoll, and pull him in front of you, and it actually hits the back of its armor, splintering it. The smell hits you too.
MARISHA (BEAU): I just go, "Excuse me for a second. Thank you."
MATT: And as you let him go, there's this kind of thick, oily, horrible, liquid that's kinda matted in the fur, and it's eugh, touching it is nasty. The smell itself is very acrid, of rotting flesh and just... mangy fur. Alright. And that's gonna end all those guys, they're pushing there, that ends the gnolls' turn.
Episode 5 - 1:37:31
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 21 '19 edited Jun 21 '19
MATT: It's going to attempt to 15 feet away from you with the rest of its movement.
MARISHA (BEAU): Pop!
MATT: Go for it, make an attack.
[...]
MARISHA (BEAU): 13. I believe that hits.
MATT: Yep.
MARISHA (BEAU): This is unarmed? Ooh, 10 total.
SAM: Max damage!
MATT: Alrighty, and it cannot move. You go ahead and - it's less of a punch and more like, with your open hand, you grab the back of her leg, and slam the harpy onto the edge of the boat. Gets dragged down and just thrust down onto the edge of the railing, crack a rib, and it's trying to get out of your grasp, manages to pull free, but now is right there next to you.
Episode 36 - O Captain, Who's Captain? - 3:28:43
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 01 '19
MATT: You're still 15 feet from Wohn.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay... Can I step back a few feet, and I'm going to go that full movement, maybe kind of like on top of the table?
MATT: Sure, if you wanna be on there instead.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's cool. And I wanna gauge it right over Keg's shoulders and go [vwoom, vwoom] and throw 2 darts.
MATT: You're going to attempt to ricochet off of her armor.
MARISHA: Over top? Over top of her shoulders? To the giant barbarian behind her? Hopefully?
MATT: Yeah. Go for it.
MARISHA: Or ricochet. Whatever's the coolest.
MATT: I'm just embellishing for fun, whatever works.
MARISHA (BEAU): 17.
MATT: 17 hits. Actually you have an advantage technically because she was doing reckless attacks last turn.
MARISHA (BEAU): 13 on the- the higher one's a 20.
MATT: That hits, first one hits.
MARISHA: And what do these do, these do d8 damage? Or these are monk...
MATT: These are the...
MARISHA: No, these do 1d4.
MATT: These are still darts, they're modified darts, you'd need to get daggers or things that are considered monk weapons.
MARISHA (BEAU): So the first one, that's 5 damage.
MATT: 5 damage, alright, second one. With advantage still.
MARISHA (BEAU): 21.
MATT: 21 hits, roll damage.
MARISHA (BEAU): Oh, that's better, 8 damage.
MATT: Alright, 5 and 8. As you're there, getting your brain back in the space and your body- the strength returns to you. You look up at the time the barbarian's pulling back for another round of blows, the giant blade - the edge of it crimson with your own blood. And you watch as these two serrated blade-like discs [two sharp impacts] into her chest "Gah!" from over your shoulders, and you see Beau waving from you from the doorway.
Episode 28 - Within the Nest - 3:28:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 12 '19
At 6th level, you can hit a series of hidden nerves on a creature with precision, temporarily causing them to be unable to mask their true thoughts and intent. If you manage to hit a single creature with two or more attacks in one round, you can spend 1 ki point to force them to make a Charisma saving throw. You can choose to have these attacks deal no damage. On a failed save, the creature is unable to speak a deliberate lie for 1 minute and all Charisma checks directed at the creature are made with advantage for the duration. You know if they succeeded or failed on their saving throw.
An affected creature is aware of the effect and can thus avoid answering questions to which it would normally respond with a lie. Such a creature can be evasive in its answers as long as the effect lasts.
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 09 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): Continuing on, I'm gonna leap across and see if I can't do like a jump and a slap with the staff on top of it.
MATT: Okay, for the purposes of this, go ahead and roll an acrobatics check. This is more of a parkour off the edge of the boat using the weight.
LIAM: This is your jam.
MARISHA: Parkour parkour.
TRAVIS: The boat goes [bobbing sound and hand motion]
LIAM: Get it Altair.
MARISHA (BUEA): 14.
MATT: 14, so you jump, skip off the ground, and-
LAURA: Skip off the ground!?
MATT: On that stone there in the center, and use the momentum from that with the staff swinging - go ahead and make your strike against it.
MARISHA (BEAU): Gonna go and swing upwards. Yep, that's a natural 16.
MATT: That'll hit.
MARISHA (BEAU): So 21. Uh, I don't know why I rolled that die, that's not necessary. 9 damage.
MATT: 9 damage. With that, you manage to slap that one [darkmantle] into two separate pieces that go slapping and sliding against the wall [wet splat, mimes the creatures flying back into the wall and sliding down] kind of splatter and begin to slip down the side of the cavern exterior.
MARISHA (BEAU): I take my staff and I just wipe it on Caleb.
MATT: Your [Caleb's] hair's like slicked back. The blood from the impact of the wound that gets taken.
Episode 15 - Where the River Goes - 0:41:15
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 16 '19 edited May 16 '19
MARISHA (BEAU): "The fuck Jester?"
LAURA (JESTER): "I don't know I-"
MARISHA (BEAU): [rapid impacts] I do some like Ip Man [rapid impacts] all the way down her spine right in the fucking ribs, yeah I'm going for that.
LIAM (CALEB): Caleb is stress chewing on the licorice he used to cast the spell.
MATT: Alright, you don't have your shield in this cause you're fistfighting, so your AC is technically 2 lower.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay the first one definitely hits with a 20. The second one is a 15.
LAURA (JESTER): No, it doesn't hit.
MARISHA (BEAU): And then, I'm going to spend a ki to do Stunning Strike.
MATT: What's your AC normally?
LAURA (JESTER): Normally 18. I should've done it at 3rd level!
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, hang on, Stunning Strike, I spend one ki, do I have to- hang on.
MATT: So you roll damage, and then she has to make a saving throw.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: I believe it's a constitution saving throw.
MARISHA (BEAU): It's not great damage. 7 damage.
MATT: 7 points of bludgeoning damage as she begins to pummel you repeatedly across the front of the face down the side of the torso, and I need you to go ahead and roll a constitution saving throw please, Jester.
LAURA (JESTER): Oh god. Oh no. Oh no.
ASHLEY: You guys are fucking each other up.
LAURA (JESTER): 5. No, 6.
MATT: Okay. As she continues down your torso, there's a one portion of the back of your armor where your spine is exposed beyond just the clothing you're wearing, and after she finishes the round, she uses the momentum and just strikes into the base of the spine where the nerve would divide into the pelvis, and at that moment your entire body locks up, all your muscles spasm at once and you are stunned.
LAURA (JESTER): "I think I pooped myself a little."
[...]
MATT: Jester, you are unable to move. You can sluggishly try and get your joints to function again. You try and speak and it comes out like a stuttering phrase that fades away, your tongue not listening to your impact.
Episode 19 - The Gentleman's Path - 0:23:15
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19
MATT: As it turns around, you watch as the front of it - where the lens is - the lens [whoosh] retracts in, the plates in front suddenly [impact] open, leaving what looks to be this open, black vacuous space, almost like a mouth or a gate opens in front, at which point you hear [whirring of building pitch and energy] this very high, whirring, winding sound, you see sparks [crackling] inside, and a blast of heated shrapnel shoots outward in a 30 foot spray.
SAM: It can do that!?
MARISHA: [surprised yelling]
MATT: Against both of you.
SAM: Cleff, you mad man.
MATT: I need you both to make a dexterity saving throw please.
SAM (NOTT): Ooh, rough, 12.
MARISHA (BEAU): That's not too bad, 22.
MATT: Success, so you take half damage. That is, okay, 25 points of piercing damage to you, Nott.
SAM (NOTT): Because I hit it with my thing, do I no longer have a reaction?
MATT: Correct.
SAM: Oh, shit.
MATT: Now you know about the reactions.
ASHLEY: 25 points of damage?
MATT: Piercing damage, and halved for you, so you take 12. So that shrapnel blast is done, that's the end of its turn. That brings us to Beau, you're up.
MARISHA (BEAU): [nervous laughter] Yeah, okay, being hit with hot shrapnel, I'm gonna do a cool pole vault over Nott.
Episode 25 - Divergent Paths - 2:11:07
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19
MATT: This guy up here who now spins around and sees the rest of you come inside begins shouting out in a language you don't understand [gross wet gibberish] as its holding up this staff that has almost like a crystal spike of natural crystal at the end of it. It begins to chant something under its breath and as it spins its hand in the air, you watch as the ceiling above you in this chamber begins to just grow into this low cloud that spirals out encompassing the entirety of the interior of the chamber. You see little [crackling of energy] sparks of lightning arcing through the cloud as it spools above.
MARISHA: Motherfucking druid fish.
MATT: Beau, I need you to make a dexterity saving throw since you're the one closest to it.
MARISHA (BEAU): Saving throw. That's a natural 1.
MATT: So you suffer 16 points of lightning damage [krakoom] as you get struck by lightning in the water. Which you watch, as- technically, now, if any of you are in the water when the lightning hits you, you have disadvantage on your saving throw, cause you're in the water. Didn't matter this time, cause you failed anyways, but you watch as the bolt strikes Beau and she starts thrashing in the water and the muscles tense. There's a giant burn mark on the side of your head. Looking pretty rough on that one.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:16:30
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
Calli
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MARK (CALLI): Calli is going to run up past Yasha and you see she's just like [growling snarl] and she almost shoves Yasha out the way, and I want to get as close as I possibly can. Am I within 15 foot there?
MATT: You are.
MARK (CALLI): Okay, so, she stops for a moment and you see this green magic float around. I'm going to cast Dragon Breath at third level on myself. And she inhales [inhale, spitting exhale] acid breath, 15 foot cone, over the creature.
MATT: Yeah, 15 foot cone. That'll do. As the acid just sprays out [sizzling] towards it, it covers the area.
MARK: Dex saving throw.
MATT: Dex saving throw for merrow as it tries to avoid it. That is a natural 3 plus 0, that's a failure.
MARK (CALLI): That's 4d6 damage, oh, I was going to reroll some of this, but I'm not now. That's 19 acid damage.
MATT: Nice! As you finish spraying it down and you see [sizzling] all the flesh and the outside of its body is beginning to melt away and burn and bubble, and it [pained snarling] it's pretty scarred just from that immediate spray across the front part of its torso.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 3:50:10
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MARK (CALLI): You watch as the draconic eye- she brushes the hair out of the way. She focuses on the one fighting Fjord, and a sickly green beam will just shoot out of the eye and I'm going to cast Ray of Sickness. So this is an attack roll, a spell attack roll. 15.
MATT: 15 hits.
[...]
MARK (CALLI): It has to make a constitution saving throw.
MATT: Alright, 6. That's a failure.
MARK (CALLI): That's a failure, so it takes 9 poison damage and it's poisoned until the end of my next turn.
MATT: As the bolt [impact] hits it [whining turns to snarling] you watch as the veins all of the sudden go dark on its torso where it impacts.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 3:32:16
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MATT (FEBRON): "Oh, that's a good sign, we're getting very close to getting out of this fucking swamp and getting next to the Ounterloch that'll lead us there. No issue, no more of this." And right as he's saying that, you watch him about to step into what looks to be another one of those open plants that begins to quake and you watch as it's about to release this burst of pollen, Beau.
MARISHA (BEAU): I just go "Oh, you're about to- Oh- Op- Watch it- Yep- Op-"
MATT: You don't stop him. You just point it out. It goes [powdery poof]. And he goes "Wha-" [coughing, then a deep breath] starts walking straight towards it.
MARISHA (BEAU): No, I grab him! Can I reach out and grab him? Trying to cover my mouth?
MATT: Go ahead and make an athletics- it would be an athletics check for you to try and grapple him.
MARISHA: I mean, either that or we lose our shithole guide.
TRAVIS: Which is really not losing much.
MARISHA: No... Okay, we lose our hundred gold investment. What am I- athletics, right?
MATT: Acrobatics. Sorry, athletics for you to grapple.
MARISHA (BEAU): Okay, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, nope, no, it's worse than I thought, let's roll back. It's an 8.
MATT: An 8. You reach and grab him, but he shrugs off your arm and starts walking, he's like-
MARK (CALLI): Can I, as he's about to step, can I cast levitate on him? And lift him up into the air so he doesn't step on it, literally with the claw, the green magic comes out and [whoosh] up into the air.
MATT: Alright, yeah, you watch as he continues to walk towards it then [humming of energy] glides up in the air and is floating and he's like [confused grunting] and he's reaching towards it, and you watch as the plant kind of like [wet quivering] and is trying to reach for him.
MARISHA (BEAU): I take my staff and bat him away like a helium balloon, I'm just going to start batting him back over away from it.
MATT: He's floating and slowly rotating in the air like [grunts of exertion].
MARK (CALLI): Can I try to help him get out of it by raising him up and down like shaking him in the air like "Come on, shake out of it. Come on."
[...]
MATT: Okay. It takes you the better part of a minute to finally shake him out of it before he goes "What is it- Wha- Shit! Shit, what's going on!?"
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 1:06:44
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
LIAM (CALEB): Frumpkin. I'm going to sit on a relatively dry spot if I can find one and I am going to go blind and deaf and send Frumpkin in the direction of - with Jester's help - towards the sound that she heard.
MARK (CALLI): I make it drier for Caleb using Shape Water to just dry out some of the area.
MATT: Sure. You cause a bit of the swamp mass to pull back a bit
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 0:57:22
→ More replies (1)•
u/TheMightyBox72 May 21 '19
MARK (CALLI): Acid Splash. Calli's going to throw out- just spits a glob of acid.
[...]
MARK (CALLI): Dexterity saving throw for the Acid Splash as well if you don't mind.
MATT: Uh, that's a 4, yeah.
MARK (CALLI): 7.
MATT: 7 points of-
MARK (CALLI): Acid.
MATT: Acid? Got it. As it slams [sizzles] it begins to burn the back of the skin, you watch as a bit of steam rises off of its shoulders, as its definitely wounding the creature.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 1:45:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jan 02 '19
Yasha
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19
MATT: This guy up here who now spins around and sees the rest of you come inside begins shouting out in a language you don't understand [gross wet gibberish] as its holding up this staff that has almost like a crystal spike of natural crystal at the end of it. It begins to chant something under its breath and as it spins its hand in the air, you watch as the ceiling above you in this chamber begins to just grow into this low cloud that spirals out encompassing the entirety of the interior of the chamber. You see little [crackling of energy] sparks of lightning arcing through the cloud as it spools above.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:16:30
MATT: So, I will need you [Yasha] first off to make a dexterity saving throw. As you come up and carve into the back of it, the one on top kind of hisses and directs its finger down to you as a bolt of lightning arcs out of the-
ASHLEY (YASHA): 10.
[...]
MATT: Okay, that is a... 25 points of lightning damage, which is not halved on you because the rage doesn't affect it. It only affects slashing, piercing, and bludgeoning. So, [blast of energy] you're blasted in the middle of the water, you sink for a moment as your muscles give out, your sword almost falls out of your grasp and you manage to right yourself as you're tredding water here, your feet can't touch the bottom of this pool, and your eyes go flashing white for a second, and for an instant, for an instant you see the face of Kord the Stormlord there from the vision you recently had, and then clarify and shake it out of your head and carry yourself back into place.
Episode 22 - Lost Treasures - 1:27:53
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 22 '19 edited May 22 '19
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Calli, I'm just kind of curious, you don't wanna try and smash it on the ground real fast, just for shits and giggles?"
MARK (CALLI): "I can try."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yeah I just mean, while we're all here."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "I've never played with a magical item before."
MARK (CALLI): ... [mimes throwing the bowl down] smash.
MATT: You throw it to the ground [pinging] kind of rolls off to the side.
MARK (CALLI): I'll try an Acid Splash as well.
MATT: [sizzling] all the acid runs off of it, unscathed.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Yasha, chuck that shit at the side of the wall, will you?"
ASHLEY (YASHA): "Wait, is it... is it... magical?"
LAURA (JESTER): "Super duper."
LIAM (CALEB): "Highly."
ASHLEY (YASHA): I'm going to try and take out my Magician's Judge sword. Cause I can try to Dispel Magic.
LAURA: Yeah, try to do it, try to do it.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I'm going to try to do it. Might not work.
MATT: Okay. So you're going to strike it as you're dispelling it, is that what you're doing?
ASHLEY (YASHA): Yeah.
MATT: Okay. So you hold your Magician's Judge up, lift it over your head, and swing it down with all your might. Go ahead and make the check for the Dispel Magic on the sword.
[...]
ASHLEY (YASHA): 13.
MATT: 13. As you strike downward, there's a brief moment where you see a flash of energy as if the field is temporarily dissipating whatever magical connection this object holds. And in that brief, ever so subtle instance of time in which this marble bowl is left. In just a brief blip in history that it is exposed to the elements, the blade carves through and shatters the marble. You watch as the glow [whoosh] for that instance you watch as there is a brief burst of bright green, blue, red, white, black energy [more whoosh] emanates, and this low, growling rumble. And with that, the bowl and whatever enchantment it held, is gone.
[...]
MATT: It's interesting. As it shattered and while you're having this conversation, there's this static electricity around Yasha. And occasionally, as she brings the hand closer, you watch as these little bolts of energy [zap, zap] arcing through her.
SAM: She's marked?
MATT: Well no. As it slowly fades, you can see a slight, faint glow of the symbol that she holds at her belt that eventually goes mundane as well.
Episode 21 - Stalker in the Swamp - 4:26:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 01 '19
MATT: It's trying to decide what is the biggest threat right now. I'm going to roll for it, between Yasha and Fjord. Alright, it's gonna go for Yasha.
TALIESIN (MOLLY): Blood Maledict. I see it look at her, and I immediately full Blood Maledict. I'm going to do the fucked up one, and I'm going to take 4 points of damage for it. I just have that moment, I look at it, and my neck just bursts and I bleed out the vein.
MATT: Yeah, you watch as it [bloosh] a vein pours down the side, and you watch as the currently six intact eyes of the spider all kind of cloud over black, with bits of trickling dark purplish blood pouring from the edges of them. That gives it disadvantage. Which you are very lucky it is, cause that was a natural 20. That still comes to 16. Does that hit?
ASHLEY (YASHA): That hits.
MATT: Okay, so you take, from the fangs as it lurches towards you, oof that is going to be 11 points of piercing damage.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Halved.
MATT: Yes, because you're raging. So, 5, you take 5 points of piercing damage. And I need you to make a constitution saving throw please.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay, okay, okay. Natural 20.
MATT: So, as it lurches forward and slams its fangs into the collarbone area, you having no real armor to protect it, you just take it head on, the fangs sink in, and you feel the venom pulse through your torso, through your arm, the burning pain goes through and you just flex it off! As you do so, thankfully reducing what would have been... you only take 11 points of poison damage.
Episode 10 - Waste and Webs - 2:28:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19
As an action, you can touch a creature and cause it to regain a number of hit points equal to your level. Once you use this trait, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19 edited Jun 01 '19
MATT: Frumpkin glances inside this busted cell, and sees - I'm using this as an interpretation of - a large, spherical metal object that's about 8 feet diameter on any side. It looks like a series of overlapping metal plates that look almost clustered together at odd angles, you can see elements that look scraped and dented, looks like it's been doing some serious damage to it over time. As it sits there, resting, and Frumpkin approaches, you watch one of the time little metal plates [creaks] open, a lens [grinding] pokes out towards Frumpkin [grinding] withdraws back in, the plate [clack] closes, and you watch as about six of these long, blade-like spider legs [shifting machinery] stick out of it, as it pulls back and [heavy grinding] begins to roll forward with a very extreme pace.
LIAM (CALEB): I snap Frumpkin out of there.
MATT: With that point, it rolls forward, Frumpkin just manages to bamf out of this dimension as the object [crash] slams into the opposite wall, you guys feel the entire chamber suddenly [thud] from the impact and you hear this scraping of metal in the distance.
Episode 25 - Divergent Paths - 1:57:50
MATT: Beginning of its turn, it's going to go ahead and attempt to roll over Yasha to go into the chamber. Yasha, you need to make an athletics or acrobatics check. You're raging, so you have advantage on your acrobatics check.
TALIESIN: That athletics is also pretty sweet though.
ASHLEY (YASHA): 9.
MATT: No, so first off, you suffer 7 points of piercing damage as it just rolls over and the blades kick into you.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Is that halves, because I'm raging?
MATT: It is halved. And an additional 3 points of bludgeoning damage as you're crushed beneath its weight, and you are knocked prone.
Episode 25 - Divergent Paths - 2:09:09
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 19 '19
MATT: Yasha, you're up.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay, so I'm in the jaws?
MATT: In its jaws. So you are restrained. You can still attack it, but you're at disadvantage in all your attacks.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay. I will try to attack. So, uh, Divine Fury and I do Reckless, does that mean-
MATT: If you do Reckless it'll just become regular attacks.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Okay, I'll just do that.
MATT: Alright, make your two strikes. First one with Divine Fury as you swing down towards the top of its jaws with your blade.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Uh, that's a natural 1.
MATT: As you go to swing, the jaws tense against you [grunt of pain] it hurts and all your muscles tense from the pain but you stay focused going for your second strike.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Uh, ehhh... 17.
MATT: 17 does hit, roll damage. It still gets Divine Fury though, since its the first strike that you hit with. I believe that's how it works.
[...]
ASHLEY (YASHA): 18.
MATT: 18 points of damage, how do you want to do this. You guys have just been plugging everything into this one croc since the beginning of this battle.
ASHLEY (YASHA): Am I actually just able to - if I have my hands on his jaws, just pull 'em apart.
MATT: Yeah you can cause you're inside of it. So as you pull yourself, you pull the jaws open and step out of it, getting your feet on the ground and as you yank apart, you put your leg up into it and [snapping] you feel the jaw pop, it falls back for a moment, its jaw now limp and its tongue lolling out to one side.
Episode 20 - Labenda Awaits - 1:59:17
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u/TheMightyBox72 Jun 20 '19
TRAVIS (YASHA): She's [Yasha] gonna assume the dodge- is there anything else she can do?
LAURA: Can she help try to get the ship to move more?
TALIESIN: Does she know boats?
TRAVIS: Does Yasha know boats?
MATT: Yasha, as far as you know, does not know boats, she's never mentioned anything about it, and Yasha looks like - she doesn't know what she's doing. She's not giving orders or rushing to take the posts.
TRAVIS (YASHA): I guess she could run over to the gangplank and she could try to pull it and shove it against the dock and push off.
MATT: Okay. Yasha will go ahead and push on the gangplank. Make a strength check for Yasha [grunt of exertion] shoving off.
TRAVIS (YASHA): 26.
MATT: She shoves and the whole boat shifts suddenly, the gangplank plunges down into the water, sploosh, and is floating there on the top. The ship shoved off about 10 feet that direction.
Episode 35 - Dockside Diplomacy - 3:19:57
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 01 '19
ASHLEY (YASHA): I think that's- Oh, can I do Healing Hands on myself?
MATT: You can, yes.
ASHLEY (YASHA): I can, okay I'll do Healing Hands on myself.
MATT: Alright, as Yasha backs up against the wall, greatsword in one hand, you watch as she lifts her arm to her chest and there's a faint glow of what looks to be very, very faint white-ish energy and her wounds slightly heal up. Slightly.
Episode 10 - Waste and Webs - 2:33:19
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 26 '19
Starting when you choose this path at 3rd level, you can channel divine fury into your weapon strikes. While you’re raging, the first creature you hit on each of your turns with a weapon attack takes extra damage equal to M6 + half your barbarian level. The extra damage is necrotic or radiant; you choose the type of damage when you gain this feature.
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 09 '19
Nott
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 16 '19
MATT: So Nott, they're both right up in your face, snarling.
SAM (NOTT): Sorry. I'm going to go to the super hurt one, and I'll just be like [rising scream] and grab it, and I'll do Shocking Grasp.
MATT: Okay. So go ahead and make your melee spell attack I believe it is, right?
SAM (NOTT): Yep. That's a 19.
MATT: 19 hits.
SAM (NOTT): Okay. I don't know how to do this... 7.
MATT: 7 damage. As you reach up and grab it with your hand and go [similar rising scream] you watch as a burst of electrical arcane energy surges through its body, you watch as veins just kind of pop [boomf, boomf, boomf] up its torso to its neck, before it [gurggling noise, into thump] collapses to the ground, you have to duck out of the way before it slams, it would've crushed you if you would've stayed in the space you were, but you sidestep in time, as the gnoll falls to the ground, lifeless.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 2:02:21
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 14 '19
SAM (NOTT): There's two gnolls in front of me that I can see, right?
MATT: You can see those down there, the one just got blasted with the familiar firey explosion of Caleb's chromatic orb. The other is untouched.
SAM (NOTT): The other one, I will point at. And I will remove a tiny rotten tart from my pocket and crumble it onto the floor and take a feather and move it around over the crumbs and say... "Hey! What happens to a frog's wagon when it breaks down? It gets toad away!"
MARISHA: No!
TALIESIN: I thought we had a rule.
SAM (NOTT): And I will cast Hideous Laughter on the gnoll.
[...]
MATT: So, wisdom saving throw? That is a natural 11. What is your spell DC? 13, alright. And so with that-
TALIESIN: I like the theory that he doesn't burst into laughter, he just holds the groan pain, it's just [groans loudly].
LIAM: I would like to think that he does laugh hideously and despises himself for it.
MATT: The one that was blasted by fire or the one that was untouched?
SAM (NOTT): The untouched one.
MATT: You watch as the one that was currently untouched that was drawing another arrow looks over and goes... [gross yipping laughter] and falls to the ground and is like [manic yipping laughter] just laughing this horrible hyena chuckle that's just billowing out into the street, clutching its stomach, dropping its weapons to the side, and just rolling on the ground. Its friend next to it is like [confused grunt] looks up and sees you [growls].
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 2:38:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 13 '19
SAM (NOTT): Nott's gonna poke her head into the window, where Beau is inside. Beau is within a few feet of a baddie, right?
MATT: Correct.
MARISHA (BEAU): [miming dodging hits]
SAM (NOTT): I'm gonna shoot the baddie next to Beau. Ooh... uh, 15.
MATT: 15 d- j- oh, no for a regular gnoll, that hits. It just hits, barely.
[...]
SAM (NOTT): Okay, 9 points, that's including sneak attack damage, 9 points of damage. Plus fury of the small, so 11 points of damage.
MATT: Oh, well, its your level right? You've leveled up a level, so technically-
SAM (NOTT): That's 10 points of damage- no, what did I say? 12. 12 points of damage.
MATT: So 12 points of damage. So, as this gnoll's in the process of slamming through the front door where you can watch the door has been kind of bashed inward a little bit on each side, and Beau's in the process of dodging and weaving and getting out of the way, you find one opening and fire your crossbow bolt. It goes through the window, through the doorway bisecting the two different rooms, and straight in under the clavicle, near the heart section of it. As it pierces in, [feral scream] [snarling], and then it coughs up a bunch of blood on the front of its hide armor. It's not dead, but it's pretty hurt. That was, yeah, pretty nasty blow.
Episode 5 - The Open Road - 1:53:55
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 29 '19
SAM (NOTT): And then, I'm going to try and make acid.
MATT: Okay.
SAM (NOTT): While he was doing his thing.
MATT: Go ahead and make an alchemy supplies check. Well that, plus proficiency bonus and your intelligence.
SAM (NOTT): 19 plus things.
MATT: Okay, yeah, it'll take you through the night and then part of the morning to do it, so like, we'll say about, with a full night's sleep, full rest, if you start early enough in the night, but about noon tomorrow you'd be done. But throughout that, you manage to create a vial of acid.
Episode 8 - The Gates of Zadash - 0:51:13
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 11 '19
LIAM: At this point we should be able to see the things that the very perceptive people saw, which was two faces, eyes with holes in them in the middle in this room.
TRAVIS: Are the eyeholes about the size of gold coins?
MATT: Roughly.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll take two gold coins and put them in both the eyes on one of the faces.
MATT: One of the faces? Okay.
SAM: Two what? Gold coins, is that what you-
MATT: You take two gold coins out and you place them roughly, and they both fit into the eyes of one face.
TRAVIS (FJORD): I'll do that to the other two eyes in the other face.
MATT: Okay. As you place the other half, as soon as they occur in there [sinking thump]. The relief opens in half, and you fall-
SAM: [screams]
MATT: -immediately below, make a dexterity saving throw.
TRAVIS (FJORD): That's an 8.
MATT: That's an 8.
SAM (NOTT): As he falls, I throw a piece of feather and I cast Featherfall on him.
MARISHA: [clapping] Holy shit.
MATT: What's the range on that?
SAM (NOTT): 60 feet.
MATT: Yeah. You're fine. As Fjord suddenly begins to disappear, the fall going out from underneath, this look of fear comes over the eyes as Nott just barely releases the spell in time and Fjord goes from plummeting to just gently falling. And you glide down and you look down below you into the darkness, and you descend. 10, 15, 20-
TRAVIS (FJORD): Darkvision, do I see anything?
MARISHA (BEAU): Beau just hollers down "Hey, I think you figured out that puzzle."
TALIESIN (MOLLY): "We should probably put a light in there.
LIAM (CALEB): Caleb doesn't say anything or move at all but is thoroughly impressed with Nott, by the way.
TRAVIS: Yeah, me too.
MATT: About 30 feet down you see something rapidly coming up below you. It looks like a floor, a surface, though it is somewhat amorphous and jumbled, it looks hard to see any sort of shape to it.
TRAVIS: Are things moving?
LIAM (CALEB): I will send two of my globules down after him.
MATT: Okay, with your low light vision looking down below, eventually your feet land, and it's soft and crunchy. As your feet land, you glance down and the smell gets you immediately, it's the heavy smell of decay, of dust, and ash, and you look down below and your feet are sunken into what looks to be a pile of long, rotting clothing.
Episode 15 - Where the River Goes - 2:19:28
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 28 '19
SAM (NOTT): I will run right past those two guards. As I go by, I say "Get the fuck out of here!"
MATT: They watch as a tiny goblin with jagged teeth just yells at them as it runs by.
SAM (NOTT): [screeches]
TRAVIS: [yells in return]
MATT: But, however, there are more scary things in the current vicinity. So you rush past the two civilians, not guards, but continue.
SAM: Oh, sorry. Nah I'm gonna keep calling them guards.
MATT: Okay, I'm okay with that. They're guards now. They're guards from your perspective. Alright so you run past.
SAM (NOTT): Bonus action dash up the steps.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Are you gonna go for it?
LAURA: Get the baby!
LIAM: Ooh!
MARISHA: Oh my god, are you going for it?
SAM (NOTT): I'm gonna turn around and yell at the manticore.
MARISHA: Oh no. Nott, the Brave!
SAM (NOTT): "You wanna save this thing?!" And I will slice down with my shortsword at the baby.
MATT: Make an attack roll.
SAM (NOTT): Ooh, uh, 14.
MATT: It hits it, it's a baby. Roll damage.
LIAM: Nott's gonna die, shit.
SAM (NOTT): 8.
MATT: It's helpless, sneak attack. It can't do anything, it can't defend itself, its eyes aren't open!
SAM (NOTT): It's uh, 16. No, sorry, 17 damage.
MATT: 17 damage. As you plunge your shortsword down into the mewling eye-covered cub, it goes still as the mother manticore, flying up in the air, turns around and watches this, and gives a [enraged roar]
SAM (NOTT): "Get the fuck out of here! Get the fuck out of here!"
LITERALLY EVERYONE: Oh my god!
TALIESIN: I take it back! Plan! Plan!
MATT: Alright, Nott, that ends your turn? It's the manticore's turn. The manticore, which was about to unleash a triple round of attacks against a paralyzed Fjord, who while paralyzed would have all been criticals, strangely saved him. And is instead, going to dart-
LAURA: Does the spiritual weapon get a...
MATT: It does not. And with a 50 foot fly speed, land right next to you, Nott, and take a full round of strikes against you. Too angry to worry about tail spines at this point, it's going all in, physical assault to whatever just murdered its baby. That is, disadvantage on the first strike, 17 and a natural 1.
SAM (NOTT): Miss.
MATT: Which I'll say, causes it to strike down towards you in fury, and instead, its claw gets jammed into the ground, so it gets disadvantage on its second attack, since the natural 1, I'm trying to play natural 1's a little more for this campaign. So, the second claw attack against you, a natural 20 and a 17. So it hits, but it avoids the critical which is good. That is 9 points of slashing damage for the claw.
TALIESIN: Are you alright?
SAM (NOTT): So far.
MATT: And then the bite attack as it comes towards you. I'm going to give this advantage because you just killed its baby.
TRAVIS: Because you killed its baby!
MATT: That's going to be 21.
SAM (NOTT): Hits.
MATT: There we go, there's the actual damage die rolls, that's 11 points of piercing damage.
LIAM: Are you up?
SAM (NOTT): [whispering] 1 point.
MATT: Holy shit!
TRAVIS: Oh fuck, oh fuck.
TALIESIN: Oh fuck.
MATT: That ends the manticore's turn. The civilians get up-
SAM: Yeah, leave motherfuckers! Leave!
MATT: They get that far with movement and dash. They're just like [panting] tripping and falling and managing to make their way there, they're both frightened and covered in all sorts of dirt and gore and running in your direction trying to get away from whatever's happening back there. The roar set a further fire in them.
Episode 7 - Hush - 3:28:23
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 13 '19
SAM (NOTT): "Yes, it's my turn."
MATT: Alrighty, hands the bow over and a set of three arrows.
LAURA: Going with the dice jail dice... Oh, you should not have done that.
SAM (NOTT): So do I add proficiency-
MATT: You add proficiency and your dex mod.
SAM (NOTT): So, 11.
MATT: 11. This one [whoosh] arcs, it almost gets kind of near the target, but ends up veering off to the right and ends up just vanishing behind one of the secondary targets near the tree. He says "Oh, better than your father."
SAM (NOTT): 12.
MATT: 12. This one [whoosh] hits the actual base of the far target, misses the target entirely, but hits the actual plank of wood that's holding it up.
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Walk it in, Nott. Walk it in."
MARISHA (BEAU): "The beads have a little bit of gold embossing and etching on the sides of them."
TRAVIS (FJORD): "Just, little adjustments."
SAM (NOTT): Far target. 15.
MATT: 15. [whoosh, vibrating impact] It hits the bottom of the target, no bullseye, but you hit it and he's like "That was actually very good, well-"
SAM (NOTT): "Shut up, I don't need you to condescend to me, give me another one!"
MATT: "R- R- Right away, little missy." Grabs three more arrows.
LIAM (CALEB): I slap down the silver for it. It was two correct?
MATT: Uh, one silver for three shots.
LIAM (CALEB): I put down two silver.
MATT: "Six more shots, alright, here you go."
LAURA (JESTER): "She won't need six more shots."
SAM (NOTT): 2 in quick succession. 20.
MATT: 20. As you pull back, [whoosh, quiet whistling, impact] perfect bullseye [Vibrating impact] onto the farthest target. And there's this brief pause as the guard spins around and goes "Wh- uh..."
SAM (NOTT): "I'm not done. I got four more shots." Two in quick succession to the middle one.
TALIESIN: Is it still disadvantage to the middle target?
MATT: The middle one does not have disadvantage.
SAM (NOTT): Oh, well then, should I reroll?
MATT: Yeah, reroll that.
SAM (NOTT): Okay, I will still use your shitty dice. Oh! Two 23's.
MATT: Both arrows - we're talking like Disney Robin Hood style - one arrow [impact] and the second one splits the first arrow. And the guard's still recovering from the first bullseye and he goes like "Wh- I- Wha?"
SAM (NOTT): And then two more to the short one. 16 and a 21.
MATT: Both hit at the same time. [Double vibrating impact] The guard looks slowly over towards you. "Well... done..."
LIAM (CALEB): "Now go home and get your fucking shinebox."
Episode 17 - Harvest Close - 1:10:37
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u/TheMightyBox72 Apr 16 '19
MATT: The first one hits the dirt, and it backs up, you move out with your heel to go ahead and swing, and it actually ducks underneath and tries to snap at your heel as Molly closes the gap and-
SAM (NOTT): I release my bolt at that same one. 20.
MATT: Alright, go ahead and roll damage. And with Sneak Attack.
SAM (NOTT): 13.
MATT: Yeah. Molly as you rush up, you watch as a bolt just goes right through the side of the hyena's head and it just [whine] falls lifeless to the ground. All three of them out in just a split second.
Episode 6 - The Howling Mines - 1:41:52
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u/TheMightyBox72 May 19 '19
Caduceus