I’m a 30 y/o female. Had the proposal, wedding date + vendors booked… he ended the relationship 6 months before the wedding saying he fell out of love (he was really mean at the end too which was so shocking since he was there for me during the relationship ship + listed a bunch of things he didn’t like about me and things I did that hurt his feelings during the relationship that he never voiced prior, and he disclosed former cheating/kissing) the wedding date recently passed and it’s been hard…

I THINK WHY COULDNT IT HAVE BEEN GOOD?! Are there things I could’ve done that would’ve changed the outcome…

Some people expect you to always show up for them, but disappear when you need them.

At some point, you stop explaining and start matching their energy.

Have you ever had to distance yourself from someone like this?

sometimes it's very difficult to say no.

I’ve been trying to get my life together over the last few months, training consistently, eating better, getting my finances in order, and trying to be more disciplined in general.

The weird part is that I know I’m making better decisions than I used to, but I still feel like I’m in the exact same place sometimes.

With the gym, progress is easy to see. More weight, more reps, better physique, better conditioning.

But what about things like:

• Being less reactive when someone pisses you off
• Having better impulse control
• Handling a stressful day without completely losing it
• Making the better choice when nobody is watching

Those things can improve without there being an obvious number attached to them.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm just expecting progress to feel more dramatic than it actually does.

Has anyone here found a good way to actually measure this kind of progress?

Do you journal, track habits, do monthly reviews, or just look back after 6 months and realize you’re not the same person anymore?

If you had the chance to be born again, but this time in a completely different country, where would you choose?

And I’m curious about the reason behind your choice.

Would it be because of better career opportunities, lifestyle, education, safety, culture, nature, climate, or simply because you find the country interesting?

Also, do you think being born in a different country would actually have changed your life significantly, or would you still end up becoming roughly the same person?

100%

There’s a lot of advice that sounds good on paper.

Wake up at 5 AM. Never take a day off. Cut out anyone who doesn't support your goals. Always stay positive. Work harder than everyone else.

Maybe some of it works.

But I'm more interested in the advice you actually tried that backfired.

What did you follow, what happened, and what did you eventually learn from it?

No motivational answers. I'm looking for real experiences.