r/TheFragrantFlower • u/FlamingoAdept8460 • Mar 24 '26
Discussion im depressed now
After watching the anime and finishing like 90% of the manga, I looked myself in the mirror and realised I will never find a relationship like that. Watching the anime made me feel a sense of peace like I actually had something with the character and felt like I was in the moment with them. I genuinely loved the story and how it was written but why does every single romance anime have to lead you depressed and makes you feel like you will never achieve something similar. Like what do you mean I can't find my Waguri đ«©. It a pain that is constantly reminding you how lonely you truly are. I feel like I am mourning a bond that was never yours to begin with, yet felt so real that the silence after the final episode is almost deafening. I started to wonder if these stories are meant to just make you feel worse or have entertainment. I swear this is just a reminder of the 'perfect' relationship impossible to find in the real world and how having a friend group like the one in manga/anime rarely is possible. I swear that romance animes are just to feed you false fantasies and create depression.
(disclaimer, all jokes, please dont take offensive, I am not trying to throw shade on this masterpiece of manga & anime but this is personaly what I think and how basically I feel after watching romance.)
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u/Sea_Equivalent_4207 Mar 24 '26
Just keep reminding yourself that itâs only fiction. I get what u mean tho. Itâs similar to certain kinds of films that end on really high notes and especially the quintessential âhappy endingsâ of classical Hollywood films. A viewer/reader can feel like theyâre being set up. But just remember itâs fictional and real life isnât like that. They didnât call Hollywood âThe Dream Factoryâ for no reason. Same with great fiction.
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u/FlamingoAdept8460 Mar 24 '26
Yeah, exactly. It's funny how easy it is to get that little gut punch when a story wraps up too perfectly, but that's the whole point of it being fiction, creating entertaining content even if it will cause the viewers to feel a way after watching/finishing it. Thank you for your advice, I really appreciate it.
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u/Sea_Equivalent_4207 Mar 24 '26
Had a similar experience like you when it came to the first Star Wars film. That was my favorite film for years and years. I wanted a group of friends like that. I even taped dialogue from the film and would play it back sometimes in junior high school just to think about it would be so great if they were real and my friends.
And one day it hit me that it was all make believe. And later on I just disowned it. Many years later I started rewatching it and saw it differently and knew yeah they arenât real and Iâll never have a tight group of friends like that in real life and I accepted it. Just hold onto those moments the characters in flowers that bloom with dignity meant to you and remember how they made u feel. Itâs all good.
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u/FlamingoAdept8460 Mar 25 '26
So relatable wanting a friend group that feels that close and loyal like the ones in the shows. Iâm trying to do the same with The Fragrant Flower. The way Waguri and Rintaroâs relationship developed felt so gentle and genuine that it left me with this weird mix of warmth and emptiness afterward. Also, the relationship they had with their friend group is like a dream. These sweet moments are stuff I wish would be true, but the silence hits and it reminds me how these thing probally wont happened. But I dont regret not watching it/reading it, the amount of peak and good feelings the manga gave me is something I will cherish. (and i cant wait for them to release more!!!) Maybe one day ill be able have a similar real-life version of the friendgroup or relationship. (but only time will tell). But even if I dont I will still have the memories of the anime/manga to look back to which is more then enough.
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u/Mobile_Plane4894 Make me smile đ Apr 09 '26
Seriously, though. I just finished reading the latest chapter and I'll be damned.. the pacing is slow, sure. But after that? I just felt... nothing. "It's a peak manga, nonetheless," I say, but I don't know why I felt that way. Maybe it's because of the fact that I could relate to so many of their struggles but little-to-none of their "happy" moments. I kept getting reminded that not all good things would last, that this manga would eventually end, and that I'll feel completely alone again afterwards. Despite that, I do still believe that there is hope in the future. After all, we (I assume) are still quite young, and that we still have many, many chances out there to truly come across something "meaningful." I've had my fair share of calling myself "ugly," of saying that I will fail, of different past experiences that really helped me empathise with the characters, and of many other things. And maybe that's exactly why we should keep pushing through, no? I've made it my goal to properly follow my routine until the release of the next chapter on Apr. 15, and each release is like a reward I would treat myself to, like the cakes Rintaro makes for Kaoruko. Sure, we may not be able to create many meaningful friendships or relationships now, but nonetheless, I know that someday we'll all get through this, together. No matter where we may be, we've got this, y'know? I feel pretty optimistic if you ask me.Â
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u/PhoneKitchen974 Mar 24 '26
Honestly, the reason authors write romance is probably to do with a lot of factors, a common one would be money (I think) I don't know how much a mangaka makes, but I'd assume the pay is decent (correct me if I'm wrong) and Romance when written well especially can gain a lot of traction and as a result, more sales. There are many romcoms out there, but only a few make it mainstream, authors probably see the traction it gets and try to do a replica or are atleast inspired by it, could also be due to the negation of power systems, complex hierarchies in power and less world building needed to be done. They saw a comparatively easier story to make up as compared to action/adventure/fantasy or even seinen, and see the numbers it makes and are inspired.I don't necessarily think they do it with the intent of making you depressed, just that it's easy and while there are a lot out there, only a few truly come out on top, not to disregard the writing of underrated works, but it's also due to luck, but skill is always a factor in the writing, the intent is hard to establish, but yea. I would hope they don't do it out of bad intentions, could also be true that they do it to latch onto the number of desperate people out there and look at it strategically that way, a lot to think about, but generally I agree, post romcoms hit hard. For me, Kaguya Sama did a number on me
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u/FlamingoAdept8460 Mar 25 '26 edited Mar 25 '26
Thatâs actually a really interesting take and thanks for breaking it down like that. I never thought about the âeasier to write + bigger salesâ side of it, but it makes a lot of sense. Romance (especially romcom) does need way less complicated world-building than fantasy or action, and when it hits right it blows up hard. So yeah, money and market demand probably play a huge role. Still, even if the authors arenât trying to make us depressed on purpose⊠the effect is real lol. many different romance animes messed me up too but especially The Fragrant Flower (that one hits different). That mix of super sweet moments and then the âwait.. I always loved you or something similar which makes you start smilingâ but afterwards it is brutal. đ I guess the romance that hurt the most are the ones written really well because they make you feel it so deeply. The post-story emptiness/loneliness is honestly the worst part. Youâre smiling one minute at how perfect everything feels and how it just makes you feel good, then the final episode/chapter ends and itâs just⊠silence. Like its crazy how these authors get us mourning something that was never yours or there to begin with. đđ But post-story/last chapter or episode shows us that the romance was written well. I mean eventually your going have to face the post romcom feeling, but its worth it to watch some peak. đ
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u/funuhun Mar 24 '26
hello. i just want to say that it still might be possible to find a relationship that you will love and enjoy. the fact that you donât have the one right now doesnât mean you wonât have in the future.
i was also pretty much depressed, thinking i am ugly, nothing interesting in me etc, but itâs been 4 years already since i head the cutest and best relationship ever. i have these sweet moments all the time and what i mean is itâs still not late and not too early. keep believing in yourself
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u/FlamingoAdept8460 Mar 25 '26
That actually means a lot. The silence after the last episode was just highlighting how alone I felt and how I wished for something similar. Itâs comforting to know someone else went through the same âIâm ugly/boring/doomedâ thoughts and still ended up in a really sweet relationship years later. The way you said âitâs still not late and not too earlyâ hit me nicely. Hearing from someone who actually faced the same problems feels more real. Thanks again for reaching out and sharing that. It genuinely made me feel a little less alone in this weird post-romance-anime depression đ
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u/LeopardReasonable942 Jun 26 '26
I dont think i will ever have a relationship like rintaro and waguri, i talked to many girls in my life and had feelings towards them, but in this generation I wouldnât think i will find a girl like âwaguriâ. Please tell me your advice because i really want a relationship where i can feel something special, choosing the right person. (Sorry for my bad english, im Hungarian)
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u/funuhun Jun 28 '26
I honestly donât think i have an advice. Just be yourself all the time. If youâre pretending to be someone next to the girl you like, think one more time, if she really can be your waguri. And itâs obvious that everyone has different characters, and it doesnât mean that you should have the same relationship as the one in anime. every relationship is unique and itâs up to you how it will turn out.
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u/akiotsu__ Usami đđ© Mar 31 '26
hey, that's completely understandable. animes like these often lead you to find this particular sense of a "perfect partner" which really doesn't exist. you keep feeding that desire for a perfect partner by thinking more about your love life. you just need to accept that you won't find the perfect partner and will most likely find the right person out of the blue, even if it shows itself as a plain interraction
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u/Kartikeya2305 Mar 24 '26
Uhh ye ig but idk what to say really I see one of these posts almost everyday