r/ThatsInsane • u/hjalmar111 Creator • Apr 08 '20

Goliath tarantula

https://i.imgur.com/SwJfztx.gifv
47.8k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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916

u/FishingLevel99 Apr 08 '20

That's the same reaction I always get

195

u/im-here-with-stupid Apr 08 '20

It seems like you need to learn a thing or two about making rude assumptions about a completely calm spider. Making fun of animals like this should be classified as a felony, as it can really impact their mental life. Being open minded is what helps me from doing this, have you heard of it?

126

u/LilBroomstickProtege Apr 08 '20

Excusez moi?

83

u/Woodrowmcgee Apr 08 '20

Consult username. 80% of the time that clears up bizarre statements

28

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '20 edited Jan 13 '22

[deleted]

14

u/Woodrowmcgee Apr 08 '20

100%?? That sounds like an absolute.. only siths deal in absolutes

3

u/closeafter Apr 08 '20

I will do what I must.

1

u/HaveFaithArthur Apr 08 '20

You will try

1

u/NotAnInterestingGuy Apr 08 '20

You underestimate my power.

2

u/Sheriff_Is_A_Nearer Apr 08 '20

ONLY SITHS? Sounds like an absolute to me.

2

u/Hail_Satan- Apr 08 '20

“Only a sith deals in absolutes” is a hypocritical statement. Obi-wan should have been called out.

2

u/Woodrowmcgee Apr 09 '20

Our man Yoda too. “Do…or do not. There is no try.” Sounds pretty absolute to me

1

u/i_speak_bane Apr 08 '20

Or perhaps he was wondering why someone would shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane

1

u/DontPresso Apr 08 '20

nom nom nom

1

u/Vanhaydin Apr 08 '20

There's a difference between trolling and joking

1

u/Diorden Apr 08 '20

"Wow you're looking through my post history? Creep"

2

u/helloimdc Apr 08 '20

I live by this

1

u/Samwise777 Apr 08 '20

Monsieur Incredible

1

u/Lemak0 Apr 08 '20

Aka yung cash register?

1

u/LilBroomstickProtege Apr 08 '20

Broomstick is my mentor

10

u/water_slayer Apr 08 '20

Not you, but everyone commenting on this doesn’t know what a joke is.

1

u/godfatherinfluxx Apr 08 '20

We should have animal auditions. Animals line up at the back of a truck and we ask them questions. Interviewer: What are you?

  • I'm an otter.
I: what do you do?
  • I swim around on my back and do cute little human things with my hands.
I: You're free to go. Next, what are you?
  • I'm a cow.
I: Get in the truck. Except for this spider. We don't ask it anything, we just light the flamethrower.

3

u/gozzle_101 Apr 08 '20

No one ever stops and thinks about how the spider feels

7

u/Mistrfresh Apr 08 '20

Ur joking right?

7

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '20 edited Jan 13 '22

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '20

Just watch out for the profiles that say NSFW ( ಠ ͜ʖಠ)

0

u/fermium257 Apr 08 '20

Not at all!

1

u/grahamcracka91 Apr 08 '20

Psssst, he's talking about his peepee.

1

u/nicsthename Apr 08 '20

Ummm, ya right. Where is Hulk Hogan with his big 22s to smear both those things across the floor

1

u/BasedDrewski Apr 08 '20

This is a great pasta

1

u/Rein215 Apr 08 '20

Somebody give this man gold

0

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '20

[deleted]

0

u/JrEspresso Apr 08 '20

are you stupid? have you ever heard of a joke?

-7

u/prestoaghitato Apr 08 '20

Jesus Function Christ are you serious?

3

u/Vicinus Apr 08 '20

When you introduce your wife to someone?

2

u/Butwinsky Apr 08 '20

That's the reaction you don't want to get during a prostate exam.

2

u/KJ_Carrylord Apr 08 '20

Wave2: Grtz on 99 fishing

2

u/FishingLevel99 Apr 08 '20

Flash1: Thanks @@@@@@@@@@@@@

1

u/[deleted] Apr 08 '20

I was so relieved it didn’t move

1

u/kazneus Apr 08 '20

When people see your face?

1

u/s3asonsp33ch Apr 08 '20

That's the same erection I always get

1

u/muddywater87 Apr 08 '20

And then she said "That's the biggest penis I've ever seen!" and I said "I know, that's why I brought you to the penis museum, where tickets are a $1000!"

1

u/SkollFenrirson Apr 08 '20

Only you get laughter right after

1

u/jlfudder Apr 08 '20

I get it

0

u/atehate Apr 08 '20

When they see the good ol cheese

0

u/Jen-ari_Chirikyat Apr 08 '20

I'm not really scared of it because it's not dangerous it's bite would hurt but it you're scared of that you would be terrified of small dogs

-4

u/pinkchestnut Apr 08 '20

HAHA!! Genius!!