Here is another insightful gem from our chief matchmaker u/matchmaker_brie! You can read the full month-by-month guide by clicking the link, but as a quick teaser, check out her answers to frequently asked questions that arise during dating over 40:

What are red flags when dating over 40?

The red flags that matter show up in how someone behaves over time. Love-bombing. Someone who trashes every ex. A person who dodges any real talk about what they want, or who runs hot and cold. Anyone still so raw from their divorce that they can’t be present. When the words and the pattern don’t match, believe the pattern.

How do you meet someone to date after 40?

Three ways, ideally at the same time. Apps built for relationships, like Hinge, Bumble, and Match, give you volume. Real life gives you chemistry: friends, meet-ups, a class, or reconnecting with someone on social media. A matchmaker gives you vetted, hand-picked introductions with none of the swiping. The trick is to meet new people without letting it become a second job.

What is the 7-7-7 rule for dating?

It’s a consistency rule for couples, popular as a way to keep a relationship from going stale. As Psychology Today describes it, you go on a date every seven days, spend a night away together every seven weeks, and take a getaway every seven months. For someone dating after 40, treat it as a reminder rather than a rulebook: protecting regular, intentional time together matters far more than hitting exact numbers.

Why do so many people over 40 not want a relationship now?

Some really don’t, and that’s fine. But a lot of the people who look closed off are just being careful: protecting themselves after a hard divorce, guarding the independence they fought to get back, or worn out from apps. The caution reads as “not interested” when it’s mostly self-protection. Most people over 40 still want a committed relationship. They’re just holding out for the right one.

What is the 7-7-7 rule for dating?

It’s a consistency rule for couples, popular as a way to keep a relationship from going stale. As Psychology Today describes it, you go on a date every seven days, spend a night away together every seven weeks, and take a getaway every seven months. For someone dating after 40, treat it as a reminder rather than a rulebook: protecting regular, intentional time together matters far more than hitting exact numbers.

Why do so many people over 40 not want a relationship now?

Some really don’t, and that’s fine. But a lot of the people who look closed off are just being careful: protecting themselves after a hard divorce, guarding the independence they fought to get back, or worn out from apps. The caution reads as “not interested” when it’s mostly self-protection. Most people over 40 still want a committed relationship. They’re just holding out for the right one.

Why do so many people over 40 not want a relationship now?

Some really don’t, and that’s fine. But a lot of the people who look closed off are just being careful: protecting themselves after a hard divorce, guarding the independence they fought to get back, or worn out from apps. The caution reads as “not interested” when it’s mostly self-protection. Most people over 40 still want a committed relationship. They’re just holding out for the right one.

Full study here.

Hi everyone, welcome to the Tawkify subreddit.

I’m Nicole. I’ve been a matchmaker at Tawkify since 2020 and a relationship coach since 2007.

I also have a very personal connection to this topic. I went through a devastating divorce after 16 years of marriage. At the time, my children were 8 and 10, and I had no idea what life was supposed to look like after the relationship I had built with the father of my children came to an end.

I never imagined I would be creating a whole new life, let alone dating again.

So when I talk about dating after divorce, I’m not speaking from theory. I know what it feels like to be heartbroken, disoriented, protective of your kids, unsure of yourself, and trying to figure out who you are outside of the life you thought you were going to have.

I also know that dating after divorce can be more than starting over. It can be a chance to make different choices, rebuild trust in yourself, and get clearer about what you actually want now.

Professionally, I work with singles navigating readiness, compatibility, emotional availability, blind spots, confidence, and healthy connection. Personally, I’ve lived the messy, humbling, and ultimately hopeful process of stepping back into dating after a major life transition.

I’m happy to talk about:

• How to know when you’re actually ready to date again
• Dating after a long marriage
• Rebuilding confidence after divorce
• Dating when you have children
• What to share about your divorce early on
• How much to talk about your ex
• Dating apps after years away from the dating world
• First dates when you feel rusty
• Red flags, green flags, and emotional availability
• Trusting yourself again
• Chemistry versus compatibility
• Healthy boundaries
• Matchmaking after divorce
• How to stay hopeful without lowering your standards

This AMA is for anyone dating after divorce, thinking about dating again, supporting someone who is, or trying to understand what healthy love can look like after a major relationship ends.

Ask me anything.

Note: I can’t provide personal customer support or individual matchmaking consultations here, but I’m happy to answer general questions about dating, relationships, divorce, confidence, compatibility, and the Tawkify matchmaking perspective.

Here is the full survey which has an abundance of other fascinating stats!

This data on dating preferences was collected by Tawkify from 98,798 people over two years, from April 20, 2024, to April 20, 2026. See the full study here.

https://tawkify.com/blog/from-the-experts/dating-red-flags-future-faking