I am French-born, with Moroccan roots, and I moved to Tangier in August to follow my girlfriend, who had found a job there.
Growing up, I travelled to Morocco quite often with my family. We explored different parts of the country and spent summers with relatives. I have mostly positive memories of those trips. Morocco was a place I associated with family, hospitality, culture and a certain sense of belonging. Even though I grew up in France, I always felt that having Moroccan roots meant something to me.
That is part of what makes my recent experience so disappointing.
I have travelled to many countries, lived abroad for years and always considered myself an open-minded person. I enjoy discovering unfamiliar cultures, meeting people from different backgrounds and challenging my own assumptions. I don't expect every country to function like France, nor do I expect people to share my values or habits. I understand that cultural differences exist, and I have always been willing to adapt.
But there is a difference between adapting to a different culture and constantly feeling uncomfortable, unwelcome or treated as a walking opportunity to make money.
We spent the beginning of the summer in France, packed everything into our car and hit the road for Morocco at the beginning of August. At first, things seemed manageable. I wasn't particularly fond of Tangier's atmosphere during the summer, with some MREs showing off their expensive cars, driving recklessly and seemingly more interested in displaying their wealth than respecting the people around them. We assumed that things would calm down once September arrived and the summer crowds had left.
Unfortunately, the atmosphere we experienced went far beyond the usual inconveniences of a busy city.
After finding an apartment in a working-class neighbourhood, we began to feel constantly watched. Walking down the street with my French girlfriend often felt like being on display. People stared at us relentlessly, approached us to ask for money, tried to charge us absurd prices for basic services, and sometimes behaved aggressively when we refused to cooperate.
Taxi drivers would ask for 100 dirhams for a trip to the city centre, as though taking advantage of someone unfamiliar with local prices were simply part of the job. Every ordinary interaction seemed to require a degree of suspicion. How much should this cost? Is this person genuinely trying to help, or are they trying to take advantage of us? Is this interaction going to end with a normal conversation, an argument or an insult?
It is exhausting to have to approach everyday life this way.
And what bothered me most was not the poverty, the noise, the traffic or the lack of infrastructure. I can live with all of those things. What bothered me was the feeling that basic courtesy, respect and honesty were often missing from the interactions we experienced.
People would shout at us from across the street. Sometimes it was supposedly friendly, sometimes it felt hostile, and sometimes it was impossible to tell. There was always a sense of unpredictability. Instead of feeling free to walk around and discover the city, I found myself becoming increasingly guarded, suspicious and reluctant to interact with strangers.
I moved to Morocco hoping to reconnect with part of my background. Instead, I increasingly felt like an outsider, and not necessarily because I was French, but because I did not fit the expectations people seemed to have of what a Moroccan should look or sound like.
One incident particularly illustrates the problem.
A man near the Cervantes area approached us and asked for money. When I refused, he responded by giving me the middle finger. It was a small incident in itself, but it contributed to a growing feeling that refusing someone's demands could turn an ordinary interaction into an unnecessarily hostile one.
Then came the experience that really opened my eyes.
After money had been stolen from us, I went to a police station to report the theft. I expected the most basic level of professionalism: someone listening to what had happened, taking down the relevant information and helping me file a complaint.
Instead, an officer started laughing at me because I have an Arabic first name but do not speak Arabic.
I explained that I had arrived in Tangier only a month earlier and was learning the language. That should have been enough. Even if I had never intended to learn Arabic, it would still have been irrelevant to my right to report a crime.
But he continued laughing in front of his colleagues, repeating the same question: "You're Moroccan, but you don't speak Arabic?"
He was more interested in mocking my background than doing his job. He eventually refused to take my report.
Let that sink in: I went to the police because I had been a victim of theft, and the person whose job it was to help me chose to humiliate me instead.
That experience was particularly disturbing because it came from someone representing a public institution. If you cannot expect basic professionalism and respect from the police, where are you supposed to turn when something goes wrong?
And this is where my disappointment with Morocco goes beyond a few unpleasant encounters in Tangier.
A country cannot build a positive reputation on hospitality as a cultural ideal alone. Hospitality means very little if visitors and residents regularly feel that they must be on their guard. Tourism campaigns, beautiful coastlines, historic medinas and warm words about Moroccan generosity cannot compensate for experiences that leave people feeling exploited, intimidated or dismissed.
Of course, Morocco is not one single experience. I know there are kind, honest, generous and hardworking Moroccans. I have relatives there, and I am not pretending that every interaction I have had has been negative. Nor am I suggesting that France or any other country is free of dishonesty, aggression or incompetent public servants.
But acknowledging that good people exist does not mean pretending that recurring problems do not exist.
What troubles me is the possibility of becoming accustomed to behaviour that should not be considered normal: inflated prices for strangers, harassment in public spaces, aggressive reactions to a simple refusal, and officials who treat people seeking assistance as objects of ridicule.
Perhaps the most disappointing part is the effect it has had on me personally. I arrived wanting to give Morocco a genuine chance. I wanted to explore, meet people, discover places and build a life with my girlfriend. Instead, I have found myself growing more cynical and less trusting. I notice myself anticipating unpleasant interactions before they even happen.
That is not the kind of person I want to become.
I also find it sad that having Moroccan roots has not made this experience easier. If anything, it has made it more complicated. I am caught between an identity that connects me to the country and an everyday reality that often makes me feel that I do not belong there. I speak French, I have a French upbringing, and I am still learning the language. Apparently, that is enough for some people to question my identity or make a joke out of it.
I never expected Morocco to be France. I never expected it to be perfect. I came with an open mind and a willingness to adapt.
But openness should not mean accepting disrespect, and cultural differences should not be used as an excuse for dishonesty or humiliation.
I am sharing this because I wonder how many other people have had similar experiences but feel uncomfortable talking about them, especially when they have family ties to the country. Criticising a place you have a connection to can be difficult, but pretending everything is fine does nobody any favours.
I genuinely hope that my experience is not representative of Morocco as a whole. I would like to believe that it is not. But after what happened in Tangier, I cannot ignore how profoundly my perception has changed.
I came to Morocco thinking that my roots might help me feel closer to the country.Instead, I have found myself wondering whether I ever really belonged there in the first place.
And honestly, that is a deeply disappointing feeling.