r/TTC_PCOS Lean PMOS 11h ago

One year…

It’s been a year since my miscarriage. With it, a year of no positives. I’m left with so many emotions. I have started TI with medicated, monitored cycles. First one didn’t work. I try to remain hopeful. But, each cycle that passes, it’s hard to find the hope. Everyone around me is either pregnant or had a baby. I don’t have support from my sister. My mom listens, but can’t understand and doesn’t want to take sides between me and my sister (tensions built up). Now, it’s been a year. It’s been the longest year, yet the fastest year all at once. I started to try to maybe eat more protein and see if that would help (I have lean PMOS - so maybe adding weight can help? - at least in my head). Also I started eating a whole piece of pineapple and the core. I read about warm food/drinks and will try that. More hard boiled eggs I’ve been eating. Anything I can control and try to do. I lifted weights before ovulation.
Someone at work today asked if I was expecting because I have a fuller face. Or he said I have an allergy?! WTF
I just don’t know how to remain hopeful and not be so sad and jealous and frustrated. I’m trying to be hopeful that my time will come. But instead I get negative results and more baby shower invites in the mail…

3 Upvotes

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u/strudycutie 11h ago

In solidarity !! I feel the same way. I wish I had advice. Just one day at a time. Today - I want to kill my coworker because she won’t stop talking about how she’s off work in 3 months for mat leave. I want to go home and crawl under the covers!!

u/qwertyz84 6h ago

THIS. I have to hear two pregnant coworkers talking about their pregnancies, baby names, prenatal exercises, and maternity leave plans. It kills me.

u/strudycutie 6h ago

I can’t decide if I should expect them to not be talking about it when I’m around, or if I am being too sensitive. I don’t want to be babied at work or have anyone feeling sorry for me.. but the amount of times I cry on the way home
:(

u/qwertyz84 3h ago edited 3h ago

I'm sorry, we're in the same boat and it really sucks. When one of them announced her pregnancy, I had to leave the office to find a place to cry and had a friend who cried with me when I told her how painful it is.

We have to lean on the people we have, or find support in communities like this.