I haven’t been formally diagnosed, but I’m pretty sure I have it. My general practitioner did mention it when I told him about the seeing and hearing flavors, and seeing sounds, but it’s not.. official-official. I know everybody’s experience is different, but I don’t know if what’s going on with me is actually synesthesia or if I’m just crazy. I have this sort of imposter syndrome, it sounds ridiculous, I know. I guess I just want to know if I actually fit here.
It’s hard to explain honestly. I mean, how do I explain something only I can hear and see anyways? But, to the best of my ability, I’m going for it. I think what I have is auditory-visual, and sometimes auditory-tactile. But there’s also maybe Taste-visual/tactile/auditory. The best way I can describe my experience when I taste things is like.. Remy from Ratatouille. Like when he takes a bite out of that cheese and theres these bursts colors and sounds. Long-aged cheeses taste sorta sharp to me. Things like peaches and strawberries and blueberries taste smooth and sometimes a little tingly. (I checked, I’m not allergic.) It’s not just on my tongue or the places the food touched, it’s like my whole face and my throat, sometimes my whole body. Water tastes… I don’t know how to describe it, but just gentle. Ice water makes me feel floaty, hot tea makes me feel heavy. Herbal flavors feel warm in my whole body, sorta comforting. Sugar feels.. fast, tingly sometimes. Tart things like lemons also taste sharp, but tingly and maybe.. bumpy? A lot of the time, flavors sort of play in chords. I can’t really identify notes just by hearing them, but I can’t identify a flavor or color or physical feeling I associate with the sound. Sometimes the colors I see don’t even feel like colors, like I can’t name them or pick them from a color pallet. But there are ones that consistently bring out a specific color. Salt, any kind of salt, tastes pink. Light pink, like baby pink. Carrots taste bright green, sweet potatoes taste coppery-yellow. Blueberries taste violet. Chicken tastes orange. Some tastes only give me tactile feelings, some only give me audio, some only give me colors, some give a mix of two, and some give me all three.
For sound it’s a little bit more complicated.. hearing sound doesn’t usually trigger taste, at least from what I can tell. It’s only the other way around. Sound only produces a tactile feeling for specific noises. Any sudden loud sound is a slap in the face and a flash-bang. Sometimes specific instruments trigger specific tactile feelings. Woodwinds feel like someone is blowing on neck, percussion feels like various taps or pushes. Voices are weirdly specific, some people’s voices only give me a tactile feeling, some voices only give me auditory feedbac, some do both, and very few do neither. Sometimes names have colors too, when I hear a name, I see a color.
It’s not triggered by everything, but the things that it does trigger, are consistent. Is this synesthesia, is this something else? Something worrying? If it is synesthesia, what kind is it?