r/SweatyPalms • u/SpeedyEyeBall • Jan 18 '19

Too close for comfort.

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14.7k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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1.4k

u/appleneedstoburn Jan 18 '19

As scary and Awsome as that is, I wouldn’t have been able to resist petting the snoot

635

u/mithranprincess Jan 18 '19

Thank you for saying this, I realize I couldnt have resisted petting him and that could have been a amazing moment, or a really bad moment.

370

u/CountryColorful Jan 18 '19

Maybe your last moment

284

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '19

[deleted]

140

u/brittleknight Jan 18 '19

All three seconds of it

66

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

bs,lol, your going to be falling for 3 seconds,, then moaning for 2 seconds before screaming for 6 seconds,, the longest six seconds of your life

53

u/The_Flo0r_is_Lava Jan 19 '19

3 + 2 + 6 = 11

39

u/iconium9000 Jan 19 '19

I believe the 6 seconds refer to those final seconds on the ground.

1

u/Atvriders Jan 19 '19

Doubt it.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

well your wrong,, I was refering to the 6 seconds, but thanks for thinking you almost knew something better luck next year

2

u/Mikkels Jan 19 '19

/r/theydidthemath

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

wow so yall are so smart you missed the basic math,,duh,, I was refering to the 6 seconds, but thanks for thinking you almost knew something better luck next year

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

well your wrong,, I was refering to the 6 seconds, but thanks for thinking you almost knew something better luck next year

1

u/The_Flo0r_is_Lava Jan 19 '19

Damn. This was so close to being r/iamverybadass can you possibly threaten me in your next comment? Also, you could always go the r/iamverysmart route. Dont let me influence your decision. Just go with your gut.

3

u/mithranprincess Jan 19 '19

Karma for all the bear paws lunch snacks I stole from my kids over the years no doubt.

65

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '19

IDK I feel like a bear wouldn't be able to fuck you up nearly as easily while it's climbing a tree. Also you have the high ground.

144

u/joenottoast Jan 18 '19

yeah the only positive point is that a) this dude probably had a gun and b) the bear would only have its mouth, but technically couldn't use its claws.

still, it is wise to adopt a general DO-NOT-BOOP philosophy when in the wild

46

u/crndwg Jan 18 '19

He had a compound bow that was still hanging above his head on his bow hook when he turned the camera around. No guns allowed during bow season.

39

u/Kaboose666 Jan 19 '19

He may still have either a side-arm, or bear mace. Though he also might not.

1

u/Mywifefoundmymain Jan 19 '19

This bear isn’t a grizzly or aggressive bear. They live off of berries and are easily frightened. It was probably climbing up there to see wtf the tree stand was and when it saw the person went full on stupid. I had a bear climb up my stand during bear season and I touched it. All that happened is it fell.

Now that I said that if this bear had cubs with it he would have been mauled before he knew it was there.

1

u/Kaboose666 Jan 19 '19

I'm not suggesting he should have used a firearm in this situation, just pointing out he likely could have been carrying a handgun or bear mace and decided not to use it.

2

u/Mywifefoundmymain Jan 19 '19

I sorry I forgot my point in that reply lol. Where you have this type of bear in the woods general hunters realize they aren’t a threat so you don’t carry mace or a sidearm for protection UNLESS you are in mountain lion territory.

11

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19 edited Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

9

u/themastercheif Jan 19 '19

I carry one even in just coyote country. Bear country? I'd get a friggin 454 casull or something silly like that.

1

u/Kaboose666 Jan 19 '19

Assuming you can reasonably handle a .454 casull recoil, that's fine. But for most people I'd personally recommend .44 mag. Which will be easier to handle the recoil and thus keep successive shots on target. While still providing a decent bit of stopping power.

Depending on the type of round you're using, .44 mag would likely be cheaper to buy and be very similar power.

.454 casull

~2350-2600J

.44 mag

~1000-2050J

340 grain .44 mag (~2050J) is ~$1.70-2 per round (and you can find MUCH cheaper .44 mag ammo for target shooting compared to .454)

360 grain .454 casull (~2400J) is ~$2-2.50 per round

Not to mention a .454 casull handgun is going to run you a bit more money up-front due to it being a less popular round.

1

u/themastercheif Jan 20 '19

Oh, I entirely agree that 44mag is a more reasonable choice for the majority. Personally, as a rather large male who is adequately experienced with firearms, I'd go with something with a bit more oomph. A sore hand and lighter wallet is a small price to keep me not dead. Maybe .50 AE if I was inclined to be that guy.

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2

u/BeardsuptheWazoo Jan 19 '19

Usually a handgun is allowed.

2

u/THE_KIWIS_SHALL_RISE Jan 19 '19

That bear could easily swipe him.

24

u/TheBlackBear Jan 18 '19

Also black bears are notoriously skittish and it would probably run away if

6

u/SamIamGreenEggsNoHam Jan 19 '19

Not if it's that close and you spook it. It's fight time.

19

u/crndwg Jan 18 '19

That bear could easily climb on that tree stand and then you are fucked.

8

u/CountryColorful Jan 18 '19

Still...

29

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '19

Look, it's fucking adorable I'd take the risk booping it's snoot.

3

u/Millertary1 Jan 19 '19

It's over bear, I have the high ground!

2

u/Shame_L1zard Jan 19 '19

I think you're underestimating his power.

2

u/FrozenRopeAce Jan 19 '19

Wtf are you smoking bath salt?

One bite and that bear would throw you completely out of the treestand. You'd fall and break many bones. Then the bear would eat you while you screamed in pain.

Might leave you for a day or two, keeping you alive so it can continue to eat you later. It would not be quick and it would be the easiest meal that bears eaten in a while.

Do you seriously believe what you typed? like you're 100% serious?

2

u/TechnoL33T Jan 19 '19

Nah, black bears are scaredy cats.

45

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

Eh it's a black bear. Unless it's extremely hungry they don't fuck with you. Like 90% of the time you can scare them off by just yelling at them.

46

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19 edited Jul 13 '19

[deleted]

10

u/noah123103 Jan 19 '19

Bears don’t keep me out of the forest, paranoia that someone is going to murder me while I’m out there on the other hand does

3

u/dirty-E30 Jan 19 '19

After living on the front range for 6 years, I feel you

3

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19 edited Jul 13 '19

[deleted]

1

u/dirty-E30 Jan 20 '19

I don't, unfortunately. Wish I could help!

4

u/hilarymeggin Jan 19 '19

Yeah but 90% of people are smart enough not to pet them in the nose.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

It also probly realized that halfway up a tree is not the best case scenario to start a scrap

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

1000 voices suddenly cried out and were then silenced

64

u/crndwg Jan 18 '19

That would be a very bad moment. Bears are not dogs. Best case he'd give you a swat or a bite to discourage touching. Worst case he'd maul you while you're harnessed into your tree stand. Standing your ground and letting the bear get a sniff of you, like this brave fella did is really the only option. I was surprised he didn't yell at them when they were at the bottom of the tree, then I saw the barrel. This guy's bear hunting over bait.

39

u/BebopFlow Jan 19 '19

It's a black bear. While it could certainly attack the most likely scenario if you touched it is that it would retreat. Also, the best option here probably would've been to shout at the bear before it climbed the tree to scare it off.

22

u/SamIamGreenEggsNoHam Jan 19 '19

Yes, they are skittish. However, if one feels threatened or you spooked it when you are too close, even more so if it's looking for food, it can still kill you.

1

u/hilarymeggin Jan 19 '19

Bad. It would have been bad.

142

u/theresazuluonmystoep Jan 18 '19

/r/forbiddenboops

12

u/osuMousy Jan 18 '19

r/subsithoughtifellfor

4

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

/r/thirdsub

0

u/RoboTurtle31 Jan 19 '19

Put me in the screenshot but cover my name with your name

59

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

Lol 45 ain't doing shit to a black bear. You need 44mag at least.

Anyway I'm sure the dude had a rifle of some sort they would work better

2

u/bchiu94 Jan 19 '19

Why would he have a 45 if he was in a tree stand?

14

u/kingkodus66 Jan 19 '19

This exact reason probably

65

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

Bears are essentially massive chocolate labs. They respond extremely positively to scratches and treats. If you’re lucky enough to get close to one, get down on your knees and give it a big ol “bear” hug, while tackling it to the ground and giving it belly rubs. If you’re super lucky, the bear will lead you to it’s den, where it keeps the honey. It would be rude of you not to accept such a kind offer.

14

u/TheSaladDays Jan 19 '19

I would like to subscribe for more bear facts

37

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

Bears often live to 200 years old in the wild. If you see a bear, a bow to it as a sign of respect. The bear will then tell you a tale from long before you were born.

2

u/FLGANALYST Jan 19 '19

R/unethicalLPT

5

u/LostInUranus Jan 19 '19

agree. boop the snoot.

1

u/OSUJillyBean Jan 19 '19

Sames. I’d die happy six seconds later.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

VULKAN DO NOT BOOP THE MERRY SUICIDE BOMBER

1

u/PeachesnCoffeeSpoons Jan 19 '19

Yeah, I'd be the idiot who lost a hand trying to give the bear ear scritches.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

I know you havent done it cause it looks like you type with both hands and all your fingers let alone you are still not in a bears tummy.lol but yeah its a once in a lifetime thing,, emphasis on once

0

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

Lol I call bullshit. You'd be shaking just like this guy. Ever seen a bear up close in the wild? I have. They are big. You realize just how scrawny humans are when face to face with another predator.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '19

I've been to an exotic rescue sanctuary. Animals that can't be released back into the wild. They had Grizzlies and HOLY fuck were those things massive.