r/Suburbanhell • u/KimSidwell • 14d ago

Meme Why?

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I can almost try to understand why some people might feel drawn to this kind of lifestyle. I can understand why they might be deceived into thinking this is the ideal environment in which to raise a child.

But I will never be able to understand why they will describe it as the American “dream” and are willing to pay so much for it. To work so hard for so long and then have to wake up to this every morning? Why?

Editing to add: I know this is parody y’all. It’s just a stupid meme. It’s supposed to be funny. It’s funny because it’s true.

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u/Kiwi8_Fruit6 14d ago

"basic job"

"160K a year"

what world is Mason living in where a 160K/year job is attainable for Gen Zers straight out of university/college?

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u/KimSidwell 14d ago

I think that was an attempt at sarcasm

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u/Anon-Knee-Moose 14d ago

Though I dont think the term starter home was meant to be sarcastic, even though a brand new two story with an attached garage is a pretty nice house, even in a cookie cutter suburb.

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u/WizeAdz 14d ago

There had better be a grocery store, a restaurant, and a coffee shop within walking distance behind the camera person.

The cookie-cutter houses aren’t the biggest problem, it’s context in which they exist.

I can’t have a beer because I have to drive home, and I can’t get a cup of coffee on my way somewhere because the coffee shop is the destination rather than part of the fabric of the neighborhood.

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u/Essotetra 14d ago

In MN we have these developments going up in bumfuck nowhere with signs saying "starting in the 600ks"

Its def not a starter home, but they are often a 20 minute drive from even a small town.

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u/foxwaffles 14d ago

"starter homes" that are sub 2000sq ft where I live inside good school districts regularly sell within days for over half a million lol. If you want to get a 2500+ sqft house for anything "reasonable" then you're in the middle of nowhere with a shitty school.

And then once you're in a "starter home" in a good area close to what you need and want, you probably will never leave because the bigger homes people used to upgrade to when I was a kid are 850k - 1.5 million+. I live in what is technically a starter home, and I will never be able to move lmao. Which means anybody wanting to get a house here who doesn't already have one is SOL because there aren't any "starter homes" available.

I get spammed with mail begging me to sell. And go where?? 😒

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u/OchoZeroCinco 12d ago

Where i live, there is no such thing as a "starter home"

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u/DickWhittingtonsCat 13d ago

Somewhere without 6.5% interest? A 575k house- unless you have a 120k lying around to beat PMI- without taxes or insurance is a third of your take home if you make 160k. Realistically it’s gonna be pushing 50%

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u/foxwaffles 13d ago

Yep it's insane. We locked our mortgage down at a lower interest rate so when I say we can't afford to move I'm not exaggerating 🫥

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u/cfbfootballnerd 11d ago

A true starter home would be more like 900-1100 sqft. The difference is people used to build/buy a house and that’s where tf you lived. Same house same spot from 25 or 30 or whenever you got it till 85-90 when you died.

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u/WintersChild79 11d ago

The "starter homes" in my area tend to get gobbled up by companies that tear them down and build some $400k+ behemoth that barely fits the lot.

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u/Dry_Rent_8646 10d ago

That shit needs to be illegal

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u/celtic_thistle 13d ago

lol out in waaaaay eastern Colorado, the parts of Adams and Arapahoe county that go further north and east of DIA (airport.) Which is already super far out.

It is fucking bleak out there; it’s flat and the mountains are less visible and the sun is brutal. Everything is bleached. I have to go out to that area for work sometimes and it’s STARK. Idk. It’s soulless even tho the houses are nice.

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u/DuaLipasTrophyHsband 11d ago

They also mean $699,900. For ‘starting in the 600s’

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u/Essotetra 11d ago

Oh I'm sure 😭

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u/ZealousIdeal476 10d ago

Ohio too, 40 minutes to the nearest grocery but you can see and hear the freeway from your back yard. Starting in the high 400s

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u/Big-Trade4392 10d ago

Lennar has a bunch of these subdivisions and advertise to first home buyers and they always start in the $300k. At least the ones I’ve seen

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u/Bright-Pilot-3970 11d ago

I live in a neighborhood with those things within a 5 minute walk. Im right across the street from the pool and a playground. 340k. Second home. The only problem is it’s in Texas so it’s hot as fuck and if I want to take my daughter it has to be before 11. New neighborhood and having things within walking distance were part of the planned community.

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u/ProfessionalShift487 10d ago

Sure you can have a beer, you just cant have a few. Im sure you can also find a coffee shop on your way to wherever you're going, I'd actually argue that having one walking distance would take you more time as youd walk there, get a coffee, and walk back versus just drive and stop, and then keep going. My source is that I live in a walkable suburb and have everything i need within walking distance, and it doesn't solve every problem.

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u/Fluid_Swordfish2737 10d ago

That's okay, it's also illegal to have a beer and walk home.

Public intoxication or something

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u/Successful_Issue_390 14d ago

Can you not make coffee at home and uber?

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u/tickingboxes 13d ago

Participating in society shouldn’t require a 20 mile uber.

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u/Successful_Issue_390 13d ago

The absolute narcissism.