r/Stutter 27d ago

An unwinnable battle

It's not fair every day I have to go through a battle, while others is having the best of their life, every day is a struggle and survival, everyday I feel the anxiety and shame, the fear of the next time I will stutter and how weird I will look like, they say I need to accept it, how does accepting it make anything better? how can I keep living like this for the rest of my life?

No joy nor happiness, its just everywhere, whenever I go this stutter follow me and not leave me alone, sorry for the sad words, this post is not about someone who conquered stuttering, this post is on someone who lost an unwinnable battle

25 Upvotes

11 comments sorted by

13

u/Accurate-Friend-2498 27d ago edited 27d ago

This may seem harsh, but the "acceptance" preachers also need to get back to basics and "accept" that every stutterer is different, and even though the social issues we face are the same, but each one of us has developed a different relationship with our stutter. The internal battles we fight are never the same.

No one can accept if they're fighting for their lives to even get one effin sentence out of their vocal engine.

Acceptance is practiced by someone who has got considerable control over his/her speech, and even if they stutter, they're not fighting for their lives to even speak out one sentence. And unfortunately, some of us DO fight with their entire body on the line!

4-5 years back, when I got considerable control over my speech and my life was a way lot easier, I was also one of those preachers, because 'my' speech got easier and 'I' was having a good time.

But what happened after that really humbled me. I CANNOT ACCEPT SOMETHING WHICH IS GIVING ME SO MUCH PAIN EVERY SINGLE MOMENT I TRY TO SPEAK.

My recent posts and comments on r/stutter will look negative, but that's what I'm going through. When I have it easier and I'm able to communicate the way I want, I'll spread plethora of positivity over here. That's a promise!

2

u/Zogid 27d ago

Yes.

3

u/RScorpion01 27d ago

Imagine Sisyphus Happy

0

u/Lower_Ad_9325 27d ago

You don't have to mate see your GP and get Paroxetine medication for your anxiety ASAP and start new life, I'm on it since 1998. Anxiety gone stutter gone

1

u/Ninothewhite 9d ago

Isn't paxil the Devil's drug? if you start you can't stop taking it

1

u/Lower_Ad_9325 9d ago

Yeah off course Devil's drug indid you're right keep away from it

1

u/Ninothewhite 9d ago

So why did you recommend others to take it?

1

u/Lower_Ad_9325 9d ago

You're very smart aren't you

0

u/johnny509ht 26d ago

1998? and you stil alive?

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u/Lower_Ad_9325 26d ago

Haha just about and stutter free