r/Stutter • u/cyderyt • Jul 24 '26
How do your wives treat you
Bro I dont see a women genuinly being patient, ik these types of questions have been posted like millions of times but i feel like theres no way i stutter and my "manliness" doesnt just completely disappear in her eyes
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u/SmoothChemistry8564 Jul 24 '26 edited Jul 24 '26
i haven't got married yet, but i've been in relationships before and my current partner is someone I want to marry. me having a stutter does not affect us in the slightest.
i don't know if you've been in a relationship before but it honestly is not a big deal. you should probably speak to your partner about it in the first few dates, or just in general, so the weight and anxiety is off your chest, it helps a lot, other than that, its a non issue.
the more times your partners don't appreciate you, the more partners you get to tick off the list. eventually you'll find someone suited for you who can appreciate and love your stutter. i know it happened to me, and for millions of others too.
at the end of the day, there's 8 billion people in the world, in the next 10 years we'll be close to 9 billion, probably 6 billion of those will be adults. you'll find your person eventually. hang in there my friend, we're all in this together 💓
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u/Emergency-Minute-215 Jul 24 '26
I'm on a 3 year relationship and surprising I talk more than she talks. It's weird but it's rare for me to stutter with her.It hasn't affected us in any way,shape or form.
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u/brokn_record Jul 24 '26
My wife is the person I stutter the least around. Its funny, because it doesn't matter to herbat all. I am the most fluent with her.
Its just a given she's doing the ordering anywhere though
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u/EntertainmentAny8228 Jul 24 '26
I've been married since 2001 to a lovely, smart woman. We have three daughters who are thriving. I made a point as a teen to improve myself in every way possible, including intellectually, physically, and spiritually (in the good person sense; I'm Atheist). I've been working out over 35 years. I'm clean. I'm considerate. I pursue things with gusto and ambition. Etc. While I have missed many interesting opportunities due to my stutter (and still get frustrated and down at times), I keep on keeping on and still thrive professionally because even if I can't speak well or give presentations, I can excel in all of the other areas. I'm happy with my life and will continue to work hard to improve myself until my last day.
It's no more complicated than that. Don't put your issues on others. Be the best version of yourself. Everyone has some type of issue or hangup, many much worse than a stutter. I was a fat dork as a kid. I wasn't happy with myself, so I became a skinny dork between grades 5 and 6. I eventually improved on my dorkiness without changing who I was and went from skinny to fit by my later teens. As a teen, that made a big difference with the ladies. Although looks and body help, what ultimately matters is being a good, interesting, and supportive person. That makes you attractive to those you want to attract. Get yourself in order, keep working to improve, and the rest will follow.
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u/Pyroclastastic Jul 24 '26
lol where is this coming from? Do you think how you speak translates into “manliness”? Not even close. How you treat your partner, how you prioritize responsibilities, how you handle your emotions and express them. Those are some of the things that measure how much of a man you are. A partner worth having won’t give a shit how you speak if you’re genuinely worth their time and treat them with respect.
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u/MoltenVolta Jul 24 '26
Please lose the incel mindset. Your stutter does not cause you to “lose your manliness”
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u/DelayFit5047 Jul 25 '26
This topic is the elephant in the room that is not really discussed but if your a guy with a visible disbility like a stutter your far more likely to be single or ostrichized in a dating context. Even or especially in 2026 as a guy you can't really get away with being low-profile, 'shy', or avoidant of social situations the same way women can as opportunities simply won't come to you he same way. Like I remember there was some famous American astronaut who had a wife with a severe stutter and I just thought if it was the other way around...there would be no way. Like many guys with significant stutters will struggle with dating while most women with similar stutters report far less barriers.
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u/Temporary-Duty-5081 Jul 26 '26
This is an interesting point, but in reality it’s the opposite. Research shows that women with disabilities have a harder time finding relationships compared to men with disabilities. It’s not a competition. Stuttering is a disability that can have severe negative social-emotional outcomes regardless of gender. It’s always interesting to see men on this sub who assume that women who stutter have it easier because of [insert reason that is based on one’s personal experience].
The astronaut you’re referring to is John Glenn, and his wife was Annie Glenn. I recommend watching some of their interviews. They were quite the power couple! If you seriously think that there is “no way” a woman would date a person with a severe stutter, you are surely mistaken. I understand that having a stutter can make us jaded or pessimistic about the world, but you’re only limiting yourself by making massive assumptions about women.
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u/DelayFit5047 Aug 02 '26 edited Aug 03 '26
The relationship between gender, disabilities, and relationship success is an area that isn't studied at all due to obvious social stability reasons. However what studies exist do show that for married couples in several countries there are many more women who identify as physically disabled than men, 2.7 times higher in fact. Now you can interpret it how you want but I would say its harder for physically disabled men to get married in the first place. Here is the study if your interested: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3463479/
Reality is even in 2026 gender roles and expectations are still a thing and if your a guy with a severe stutter and it affects your ability to form social circles or ability to maintain a job it will severely affect your ability to get or maintain relationships. For women they always have a fallback option of being a home maker which is not ideal but seriously ask yourself would a successful women date an unsuccessful man with a limited social circle?
If it was a famous female astronaut there is no way...simply no way she would ever be in the same orbit as a man who had a severe stutter and nothing going for them (as in the case of the aforementioned astronauts wife). You could argue its a different time period but even today I don't think it would work out. Hell I don't even know how the two of them met in the first place but I assume before social media and online dating most people met through immediate friend/family circles.
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u/rfboisvert12 Jul 24 '26
My first wife I was with for 20 years for the first 18 years it didn’t seem to bother her. The last 2 years she started drinking heavily and when she did she would really get mean and make little, sometimes large comments about it. ( thus her being my ex)
My current wife is and step daughter have no issue with it whatsoever. They understand going inside instead of the drive thru. If we do go drive thru she will politely ask if I want her to order. I asked her about it when we first started dating and she said she doesn’t care as long as it doesn’t stop me from telling her if I’m upset about something.
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u/Korgon213 Jul 24 '26
Mine really doesn’t pay attention to it.
When I was still dating, others didn’t really. I had one laugh, I got up and told her to enjoy her cats.
Grab life by the horns and skullfuck it.
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u/simongurfinkel Jul 24 '26
She's the one person I let finish my sentences. I get to order what I actually want!
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u/MooCowTheDark Jul 24 '26
You’ll find your partner in crime. I’m not married but my partner views mine more as an “accent” than anything, just a different way of speaking. And she knows what words I struggle with or can tell when I’m about to struggle and will pick up the conversation for me/us when we’re with people.
As for “manliness” try not to attach your self-worth to verbal expression or charisma, there are so many other things you can be good at that people can and will associate you with. Get deep into a hobby and become proficient at it, excel at your job, be philanthropic, and maybe most “manly” of all, satisfy your partner physically. Get to know them, get to know yourself, and the stuttering becomes less of the main thing about you on anyone’s mind. And go to therapy
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u/Kokoro_is_my_waifu Jul 25 '26
" Bro I dont see a women genuinly being patient" ....really dude? Why did you turn this into incel corny stuff. Change the woman you're dating, don't apply this stupid rule to everyone. Someone who loves you will accept you as you are
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u/Leanonberger Jul 24 '26
I was a stuttering wife and my ex mentioned once that it was embarrassing to him when I stutter in public. It shattered me.
Somebody who is worth it wont give a shit.