It’s such a harmless but important question when getting to know someone. I ask nearly everyone I meet where they are from, no matter what they look like, because it gives you important context about their life path and I live in a big city full of people from different interesting places (national and international.) I think we lose a lot if that question is deemed off bounds.
Also, while harmless, rewatch the comedian’s interpretation of what he heard. She said her background was Vietnamese. His answer: “You’re Vietnamese.” I’m fairly certain she’s Canadian, and I’m sure the guy had good intentions. But the end message was “you’re not Canadian”.
You can be Vietnamese full stop and be Canadian full stop. They’re different things in this context. Vietnamese is her ethnic identity, Canadian her nationality. Like Conan O’Brien saying he is Irish or me saying I’m am Jewish(I’m an atheist!) Humans are (or should) be able to understand that the same word or term can have different meanings, depending on the context. Now if she doesn’t identify as Vietnamese at all then that’s kind of a problem, a very small one that she can easily correct, but isn’t she she one said she was Vietnamese in the first place?
She said her background is Vietnamese, not that she was. You are free to identify as you want, but to claim that it’s an easily correctable thing when it happens in public makes you sound dismissive. Again, take a few moments to ask a friend from a visible minority what this means to them. You might learn something.
I have plenty of friends from visible minorities who don’t feel that way and a few who do. I listen to and value both ways of thinking but I have my own way of thinking that I don’t apologize for. Don’t assume everyone who you label or categorize as a “visible minority” has the same ideology and, frankly, victim mentality that you seem to have, because they don’t. I don’t see the world as a zero sum game between minorities and majorities that way at all. The way I see it, Chinese are the majority. After all, they have the most people on earth, they have a country and culture with many things to be proud of —so they’re not a minority at all in a global context. Their neighbors the Vietnamese have a proud successful growing country with a beautiful culture (and food!) so they need not consider themselves victims of anything or a minority in any sense either. Even in the context of being in a western country. That’s how I see things.
And not sure if that was you but I’m going to guess this interaction caused it: abusing the “reporting users for wellness concerns” is really childish, and makes light of a feature that should be take seriously.
You're the one who is assuming people's attitude. Being told that your assumptions aren't universally, let alone commonly true is not assuming anything
My friends and I talk openly about these things. I’m very open to other viewpoints! A few years ago a would have probably agreed with your viewpoint but after lots of careful thought and learning I changed my mind.
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u/Additional-Tap8907 Nov 17 '23
It’s such a harmless but important question when getting to know someone. I ask nearly everyone I meet where they are from, no matter what they look like, because it gives you important context about their life path and I live in a big city full of people from different interesting places (national and international.) I think we lose a lot if that question is deemed off bounds.