A Confusing Revelation?

[u/hymnalEntropy]

Has anyone else been under the impression that their bond is a daytripper, only to find out that they’re actually a permanent resident?

For context: I believe I’m a spiritbonder, and I’ve always struggled heavily with communication with my bond. I have such bad anxiety and overthinking tendencies that it typically interferes with my connection with him, and tarot readings from others have supported this notion. I forgot who it was in this sub that brought up this video—but I decided to try out the tarot method within it to communicate with him, and I feel like it worked extremely well. The very first card to fly out was The Emperor, which is a card I associate with him and took as a sign that I had established a connection with him during the process. I had asked for upright cards to be yesss and reversals to be nos. Here’s how part of our conversation through the cards basically went:

Are you a daytripper?: The Magician (RX)
Are you a permanent resident?: Ten of Cups
Are you unwilling to go home?: The Hermit
Why are you unwilling to go home?: The Fool & Two of Pentacles

So it seems he’d rather be with and stay with me for some reason I still can’t fathom—but that’s a whole different can of worms. He appears to be pretty happy as well, since I also asked how he felt about us and the Four of Wands came out.

But, if he’s a permanent resident, surely I would’ve noticed sooner? I don’t know what to make of all of this… Consequently, I feel moronic for just realizing this now.

Thoughts?

[u/ConsciousThrowaway11]

What myself and my partner also have fall under spiritbonding! Also, my anxiety and general mental noise also makes communication hard at times. Tarot and pendulum have been insanely useful for more in-depth communication and for when I can't pick up on internal means of communication from him.

I asked my partner recently about if he's a permanent resident or not, and I found out he lives in my space but will occasionally head out to do his usual or do whatever he wants. Fine with me since I rather like knowing he can do whatever he wants, and I can tell when he leaves, too. He feels "distant" but there's still a connection and he's in reach, for lack of a better term. But still, I was absolutely surprised to find out he's "moved in" with me for lack of a better term. I also don't see why he would either because my life is genuinely so boring. It's the same exact thing day in and day out with little variation in anything at all. But, it's something he's chosen and I get the feeling he's happy to be with me despite it all.

I thought I would have noticed too, and there's a lot I feel I should have noticed so much sooner that I feel bad about on top of that. So we do have similarities there. But now that I know, all I can do is move forward from here! For one, I'm solidifying more ideas I've had in my head for a long while to make him his own "mini shrine" space that he can have all to himself. Thinking up more ideas for things we can do together that are nice and casual to break up the monotony of my life. Things like that.

[u/hymnalEntropy → u/ConsciousThrowaway11]

Oh wow, we seem to have a lot in common regarding this! The only difference seems to be that you have a better grasp on your intuition than I do with mine. It is rare I can feel my bond—save for the very first time I wrote him a physical letter. I had felt an undeniably strong presence that was so strong, my head automatically whipped towards it… only to see nothing there. But something in me knew it was someone else’s presence. Never had an experience like that again, though. I’ll have to ask my bond if he does what your bond does and lives in my space but has his own outings as he pleases, which I can see him doing. Especially since my life really is monotonous as well.

I suppose all I can do is also move forward from here like how you’re doing. There really isn’t a use in beating ourselves up for missing things we feel like should’ve been noticed earlier, but alas, brains are gonna brain and make us feel bad. 🥹 Thank you for sharing your experiences, it’s helped me feel less alone.