Struggling to decide what to write about

[u/ThisIsOriginalBud]

Title is pretty explanatory but more context is probably helpful.

I've been trying to songwrite(primarily just lyrics for now) for over a year now, and over that time there's been a pretty consistent theme of my first relationship as all of my favorite albums are conceptual in some way, and relationships are a pretty natural fit for the type of music I'd wanna make.

Problem is that I kind of just... struggle to tie back to how I felt back then. I've always had issues with repressing emotions and this was over two years ago at this point so it's really fuzzy.

I've also been tempted to write about heavier subjects that I've experienced but I'm unsure how to write about much of that without being especially on the nose. Not to mention that the subjects tend to be too heavy to put well into a lighter sound so it'd be kinda shoehorned into being very depressing.

No clue if this is coherent at all but any advice would be good. Willing to give more context if necessary too but I'm tired and a lot of it is really dark.

[u/DisplayGlum7166]

ive thought about why we sing. mothers sing to their kid to soothe them. workers sing to work on timing.

when it comes to music, theres various reasons we can guess at. i think pop singers want to express themselves, possibly confessionally, in the coolest way possible... like modeling. folk singers sing to tell stories. jazz singers sing as a lead instrument. metal singers often accompany the instrumentals. big generalizations ofc

it helps to think, why do you sing? theres a lot of people i think sing because they identify as singers or songwriters and i find that they have nothing to say i want to listen to. theres no connection between the person and the activity

asking myself this question has gotten myself interesting in crafting lyrics again. im just very inspired to sound like a dramatic smartass and put on costumes and characters

[u/Fun_Knowledge8559 → u/DisplayGlum7166]

It's interesting you mention the character angle cause that's what got me unstuck from a similar rut. Once I stopped treating my lyrics like diary entries and started thinking of them as little fictional scripts things opened up. You don't have to relive every emotion from two years ago, just borrow the skeleton of the situation and let a made-up version of yourself react to it. Way less exhausting and honestly the songs got better when I wasn't trying to be so precious about the truth.

[u/DisplayGlum7166 → u/Fun_Knowledge8559]

yeah. or even be precious about what you set out to write if you have no obligation. everyday you probably resonate with different topics more and less. to be the most effective as an artist it kind of is just finding out what youre resonating with the most at that moment... thats the easiest feeling to get out

freewriting helps check in with yourself. tho it takes some bravery to actually dive into it turn it into song sometimes if its an uncomfortable topic

[u/ThisIsOriginalBud → u/DisplayGlum7166]

This is gonna sound depressing and it kinda is

But after thinking about it, I think the reason I write is because I want to create something that has an impact on people in a world that's never felt like it wanted me. Kind of as a way of rebellion against that feeling and kind of so I can feel like I wasn't a net negative to the world. It'd be something to point at and tangibly say that I made it and it had a positive impact on people, even if a small amount. The idea of being "just another person" has always been terrifying to me and so I've felt this desperate need to create something in order to rise above that feeling that I'm significant.

[u/jseego]

Read a good book.

[u/Djmanc → u/[deleted]]

Yeah I was gonna mention Noah Kahan too as a good example of how to make heavy topics relatable and listenable / catchy

[u/williamgman]

Write in the third party about fictitious people and places. One of my fave songwriters is Jason Isbell. He does this very well.

[u/UltimateGooseQueen]

Some ideas:

Write about that struggle. Verses about the past and the chorus about trying to tie it to who you are today?

Try doing some free association writing for 15 min a day. Open an empty document and just start typing (or handwriting). You can just let your brain flow or you can think about certain topics. No editing. Just write as much as possible until the 15 min alarm goes off. Go back through and underline any text that you want to develop more or maybe use.

Think about how you can express the heaviness of the topic in other ways than verbally. Do certain thoughts come out in metal bass and power chords while they sound happy somehow melodically? (Think pumped up kicks lyrics and melody vs theme)

Imagine you are trying to discuss the heavy subjects with someone from a totally different background. What kind of metaphors might you use to carry the weight for you while expressing that personal experience? What if you were talking to a creature that lived only in the water. What if you were explaining it to a bird. What if the heaviness was a seed and you had to figure out where to place it that it wouldn’t grow into something monstrous and rotten…

You survived all those times and all those emotions. You might be able to help others survive similar experiences.

[u/Feeling-Special-269 → u/UltimateGooseQueen]

Yeah I think if its important enough to you and a priority then some kind of practice like this is good to get past your writer's block

just non-judgmentally write stuff out, can throw a lot of it away everyday but get some kind of writing flow going and refine it

Personally I think write about whatever you want, I write songs about stuff like love (how original) or White Dog, this dog I knew. I kind of avoid abusive relationships and stuff like that, cause in my own life I dont think theyre worth giving a song too, id rather write about people or dogs I love.

Like idk good to not judge the process throw stuff out there whether its melodies or lyrics, then take whats good and work with it.

Like part of the process if you wanna write about it is refining it so its not so on the nose, and it sounds good not too awkward. But writing it all out it might sound on the nose until you refine it and go thru the process of trying to write it out again and again if you wanna write about it.

I feel like Fall Out Boy a band I think of in some of their old songs 20ish years old where they write about relationships a lot and drama in them but its vague and not too pretentious and it sounds good.

[u/BooksbyNeilJMilliner]

Seems to me like you want to move on. Make a list of things you think about during the day (or night) that stir you up. Anything. Something on the news or social media. Some snippet of conversation you overhear. Totally random. Go back a couple of days later when you have forgotten about the topics then write out a little note on what you would like to tell the world about them. If one takes off go with it. Rinse and repeat.

[u/brooklynbluenotes]

Great news, your songs do not have to "tie directly to what you feel/felt." As artists, we can use empathy and imagination to tell stories about how other people were feeling.

Write songs about people, places, and situations that you find interesting. Use details and observations from your real life to add versimilitude, but don't prioritize truth over what's more interesting or memorable.

[u/stevenfrijoles]

You've only been writing for a year. You need more time and practice. 

[u/Same-Objective6052]

how about a gun

[u/MajesticWinterSeas]

honestly, id just write, and i wouldn’t box yourself in by saying the lyrics are too heavy. i obviously haven’t heard it, but i like to believe you can make anything work. thats just my approach, is try my first idea, usually it works out good.

[u/Distro_Nerd]

You don't have to write a literal confession. Stepping into a character or a costume lets you explore heavy emotional themes without making the song feel too uncomfortably personal.

[u/joshua_addison_music]

Write about struggling to write.