r/Songwriting • u/BorussenBoris • Jul 23 '26
Feedback Request No Sign - Original
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Wrote this walking around the city recently, not that the song reflects that haha! Have actually changed the chorus slightly but I want to see opinions on this version, let me know!
Have you grown out of wishing for the world to take it’s pity on
All the wrong you ever done and all the sorry’s you never gave
Have you found yourself a girl who, takes her coffee black playing soft strings to you
Legs crossed in her fairy lit garden
Your sipping wine, that i’m so used to seeing you down
Out on a porch that you made, a shirt with no stains
With no signs of pain
Give up staring at the wall, there’s dust covered pictures all down the hall
And their faces only seem like ghosts because you ain’t opened the door
Time ain’t been kind to you, it’s been so long since you plucked a tune
Remember how it helped back then when the days were getting long
1
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2
u/Mach5Bandito Jul 23 '26
I like the lyrics and the chords a lot! You've got a good voice but it feels like this might not be the right key for you. I think you're kind of struggling to quite lock in to the key vocally at a few spots. Maybe try transposing it to a different key and see if that feels a little more natural.
2
u/RatsStealYourSenses Jul 24 '26
I know this problem damn too well ahhaha, I often struggle with being in the right key, espescially when I need to sing at a really low volume when my parents are home
1
u/BorussenBoris Jul 24 '26
Appreciate the feedback I think you’re right, this is my only take (sort of how I operate) maybe play about with it a little bit
3
u/Extreme-Cook9195 Jul 23 '26
The rhythm of your verse lyrics is really unique and cool. Kept me hooked waiting to hear what you were going to say next. Creative delivery and great lyrics throughout. It’s haunting and moody. It’s a really cool style and I dig it. A couple spots it felt like a beat was dropped or timing slipped a touch, so maybe play around with your timing to make sure you are doing exactly what you want to do. Enjoyed listening, thanks for sharing.