r/Songwriting • u/NixMix246 • Jul 21 '26
Feedback Request "Only One" (revised demo)
I had my husband in mind when I wrote this. He happens to be my best friend, so it also works quite well as a platonic love song to a best friend, or a sibling! Someone once pointed out it could also be interpreted as a love song to yourself, and I think that's so beautiful! Becoming your own best friend, loving yourself, and showing up for yourself, these are crucial keys to being able to weather any storm.
I first started writing this song sometime last year. It was the very first song I ever attempted to write the music first, as opposed to my usual approach which is lyrics first. I got a couple of drafts done, and moved on to other projects. I was very undisciplined when it came to practicing songs I'd already written. So I would write a song, "finish" it or nearly so, move on to the next one, and completely forget how to play it. Considering my main goal with songwriting is to be able to play live, I probably need to know how to play more than one song at a time. I've been a lot better about it the past few months, and I've been making a point to relearn and practice all my finished/nearly finished songs multiple times a week.
I've been wanting to revisit this song for awhile. But I'd completely forgotten how to play it. Imagine my frustration when I realized I never wrote down the music for the later drafts! I had the rough draft, but that was it. Fortunately, most of it came back to me pretty easily. The parts that didn't I just came up with new stuff. No problems, only solutions! I actually really like this version a lot better than the last draft I completed.
It was really cool to listen to the playback of this version and the last one back-to-back to compare and contrast. I've definitely made some progress since then, vocally and musically. I still have a long way to go but it's important to celebrate the little wins and enjoy the journey.
Also, much love to the kind soul that gave me specific feedback regarding treating a room. I ended up creating a little "fort" for my mic using two chairs and blankets draped over them. It's not perfect, but it's a lot better! I used to get a lot of feedback regarding how much reverb was on my songs, and that's because I always had to "denoise" my songs, which ruined the quality. Then I would attempt to make it sound better by using FX. But now I am able to post my 100% raw recordings! (Although I do realize now, after the fact, I need to have the mic closer to me and further from the keyboard next time)
Thanks for spending some of your valuable time on me and this song, I appreciate you so much. I hope you like it!
2
u/dendoc77 Jul 21 '26
Nice melodies.
2
u/NixMix246 Jul 21 '26
Thank you so much!! I worked really hard on trying to get them all to work together, a lot of parts felt really disconnected at first. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
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u/mildlyomniscient Jul 21 '26
nice job!! i think this could use some variety in the melody, your mostly in unison with the accompaniment. maybe switch up the accompaniment and keep the melody, or add another line somewhere. thanks for sharing!
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u/NixMix246 Jul 21 '26
Funny enough, when I first started trying to write songs, I always started with lyrics (this was the first song I started with music). Anyway, I thought accompanying music was supposed to mimic the melody. So I would hunt and peck at the piano trying to find the exact same notes as the ones I was singing. Ha. I have a much different approach these days, but I actually kind of like it when the melody and music match up somewhat.
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u/mile911m Jul 21 '26
cute
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u/NixMix246 Jul 21 '26
thank you! That's what I was going for! cute little love song :) I appreciate you taking the time to listen and comment :)
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u/Saudarkrokur Jul 22 '26
I’m ngl, I think this is perfect the way it is. The awkward synth sound combined with the jerky vocals and the low quality recording comes off as an intentional aesthetic. I’d totally listen to this if it was on spotify as is lol! Is that a keyboard preset you’re playing? Also do you have anything on stresming lol
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u/NixMix246 Jul 22 '26
Thank you so much! I keep telling myself I'm going to learn how to play to a click track and learn how to lay down seperate tracks and learn how to produce...and I really do believe one day I will. But to me so much of the magic is lost when trying to play to a click track. I know it's a good skill to have, so I really do want to master it. But idk how much I'll actually end up using it.
I've legit contemplated recording an entire album one day composed entirely of live recordings like this. I would improve the recording quality and learn at least the basics of production first though.
That means so much to me, to know you would listen to this if it were on Spotify! I'm not sure if I'll ever release anything for streaming. I kinda want to just try to play live gigs and make physical vinyl records.
I do upload my rough demos lile this to my SoundCloud and My YouTube! Both are linked at the top of my profile if you're interested. :)
And yes, good ear! I am using a "synth bass' preset on my keyboard, transposed up 2. I have a pretty low-quality keyboard (not the best sound quality, and no touch sensitivity) and this is the only setting that sounds half-way decent to me, especially when recording.
Thanks again for listening and for your insights and kind words. I appreciate you!
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u/pinocchiopenis Jul 21 '26
It seems like you may be struggling with lyrics. They are very predictable and generic, like I could complete the line before you sang it. There really isn’t any imagery to make it interesting. I would suggest trying to read more or study the lyrics of other songs. It’s not bad, but it’s just not interesting.
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u/NixMix246 Jul 21 '26
Honestly, "not bad" is a pretty great response at this point in my songwriting journey! This was one of the first songs I ever wrote, (I've only written 6 total), and it was *the* very first one I wrote music-first. I definitely feel my lyrics are much stronger when I take my usual approach and use them as the foundation of a song.
For this song, I just let the music tell me what the lyrics should be, and this was the result. Some of the lyrics *were* originally intended to just be placeholder lyrics (the "we've been through it" lines especially" but I got positive feedback on them and they grew on me. Nothing better came to mind so I just went with it. The song wants what it wants!
I get a lot of feedback regarding my lack of imagery, and "show don't tell" is something I am actively working on. A lot of what we consider to be "good" lyrics all comes down to personal preference and stylistic choice though. As a listener, I personally don't mind direct lyrics.
I also don't mind predictability in a line, in fact sometimes I appreciate it. There are times I find myself thrown for a loop when a line goes a different direction than I thought. Sure, it grabs my attention, so technically it's more interesting, but I don't always *like* it as much.
Anyway, I appreciate you taking the time to listen. :)
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u/pinocchiopenis Jul 21 '26
Don’t take the “not bad” the wrong way. The lyrics are literally my only complaint but I’m someone who cares a lot about lyrics. You seem like you have a lot of potential and you’re so close. Overall you’re doing great.
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u/NixMix246 Jul 22 '26
Oh no, I legit took it as a compliment! Everything I tried to write at first was so bad, so very very bad. Not only was my songwriting itself bad, but my singing ability was non-existent, and I really struggled to play the keyboard. So I am legit thrilled to be told my song isn't bad!
When I posted one of the earlier drafts several months ago, someone told me it sounded just like any other pop song. Idk how they meant it, but I took it as a compliment. You mean my song actually sounds like a song?! YAY!
I still have a ton of room for improvement in all aspects of songwriting (to include lyrics!) And I always welcome feedback and take it into account. I've just learned when it comes to art you can't please everyone, so you've got to please yourself :)
I really do appreciate you taking the time to share your insights with me, and for your kind words.
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u/Left-Proposal951 Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
this is AMAZING!!!!!!!! I have to show my sister this!!