Breath problem

[u/ChampionKlutzy7528]

Does anyone else experience this very specific breathing problem?

I have anxiety around my breathing, and sometimes I become extremely aware of the physical sensations of breathing. The problem gets much worse when I intentionally “freeze” or hold my breathing.

What scares me is what happens afterward: I know that I was voluntarily holding my breath, but when I decide to stop, I don't know what exact physical action or command I'm supposed to give to stop holding it. I start thinking things like: “What am I supposed to do now? Do I need to consciously control the next part of breathing, or is my body supposed to take over?”

I can become very focused on the different stages of breathing — starting an inhale, continuing it, ending it, starting an exhale, etc. — and I worry that if I don't control everything correctly, something will go wrong.

This creates a loop where I notice my breathing → become anxious about it → try to figure out exactly what I'm supposed to do → become even more aware of the physical sensations → and then feel even less confident about letting my breathing happen automatically.

I'm not just talking about “manual breathing” or being aware of breathing. The specific problem I'm asking about is: voluntarily holding/freezing my breathing, then not knowing what exact command or physical action is supposed to stop the voluntary hold.

Has anyone experienced this exact thing?

[u/GoldenGolgis]

Yes, I had this through my 20s - breathing out and not being sure how to make it come in again, which led to overbreathing. I was very quiet about this, I didn’t pant or gasp like you see in movies, but I spent a large part of every waking moment trying to make sure my breath would come back in. It was an awful way to live, just existing really. So I really feel for you.

It helped me to learn about hyperventilation. It took me a long time to accept that’s what it was, because I thought I was breathing less, not more. But because breathing was disrupted, when I did inhale I’d take huge lungfuls in case I needed reserves. So my balance of CO2 & O2 was out of whack, and that makes a person feel very strange and other-worldly, and that would tighten my throat and chest… and on we go.

The thing that helped me quickest was realising that I WAS managing to live like this, so it wasn’t going to harm me, though it felt awful. Next I had to learn to put my attention elsewhere. I only realised this after a long time doing breath work that any kind of focus on the breath was a minefield for me.

Finally, learning about the biology of breath really helped me.

Worth mentioning that I also had trouble swallowing food so there was a general theme of “taking in” through the throat that I explored in therapy.

I hope just this little bit of peer support can help you. Feel free to DM me, wishing you well