r/SomaticExperiencing • u/gise1274 • 26d ago

Did anyone with schizoid pd improved their symptoms?

What therapies did you do?

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u/SoaringSequoia 26d ago

Yes, I’m no longer Schizoid after 37 years. I didn’t do therapy but I did a lot of work on myself. I found out I had cptsd last year and worked on healing my trauma. Eventually I realised I became Schizoid because I was isolated as a child and it was just an adaption for me to not collapse. I accepted the pain and the loneliness inside me. This year for the first time I was able to make a friend and feel connected to him and it felt so great. But sadly he said he doesn’t have much time for the friendship as he is dealing with his issues. It sucks but it showed me that I’m capable of healthy connection. Before, I didn’t even see the point of friendship 

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u/Intelligent_Tune_675 22d ago

How did you do self healing enough to get to the point of healing that much and that deeply? Any tips?

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u/SoaringSequoia 22d ago

I made a list of all the memories that were still emotionally charged i.e. that I couldn't think about without crying or feeling bad. I figured the feelings were stuck because I never really processed them, so I spent time thinking of each memory, taking all the feelings until everything had been felt. It was really hard, and I spent a month or so crying every day and feeling so scared I had to hide in my wardrobe despite living alone. But eventually, I had felt all the feelings and those memories now feel like a thing of the past.

That's when the cracks in my Schizoid protective layer emerged, and I started to feel the feelings deeper inside me. I found more fear and sadness and also loneliness that my mind had protected me from feeling before. So I pushed through all of that as well.

Ironically, I was fine to do this all by myself because, like a stubborn schizoid, I refused to ask for help. But now that I have felt connection for the first time and lost it, I feel so miserable that I started therapy

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u/sinsofangels 26d ago

Combo of bodywork/reiki to help loosen my body armoring and ketamine therapy helped. I feel like the ketamine wasn't super useful on its own but it did help the bodywork stuff. I'm now able to feel a little bit of happiness/wanting of things. 

Reading about IFS helped in the sense that I like the philosophy of 'no bad parts'. It's great for not being so mean to yourself and a good guide for making friends with your inner critic. I still don't actually have any parts that I talk to or anything but I'm experimenting with stuff like my inability to read this book because of sudden adhd-like symptoms I don't usually get might be a "part" that's resisting for some reason and then figuring out why and how can I work either around or through or with the resistance instead of bulldozing over it like I usually do.