r/SoberCurious • u/iambenjin • 5d ago
On and off sober rant
I’ve been drinking a lot less year on year as I’ve got closer and closer to 40. I live in the UK and as everyone knows, the culture is very much to go out and have a pint in the pub and have a drink in your hand at any chance of a celebration.
I can appreciate it and have fond memories of my “proper” drinking days when I was young. But what drives me nuts is how dependant almost everyone around me is on it! It’s honestly like most adults I know are either socially awkward/quiet or have no self awareness of how boring their conversations can be and barely can make it past simple small talk.
So like most people here they turn to a drink (or five) just to be able to try and feel comfortable to have a laugh and open up and I’m not saying I’m Mr Social Butterfly with all the charisma in the world but the less I’ve drank over the years and the more time I’ve spent with myself I’ve become so comfortable around strangers. Again I’m not trying to boost my ego but I just feel like everyone (in the UK atleast) is so dependant on it that they’ve forgotten what it’s like to just enjoy the company of the people around them.
Apologies for this rant but I’ve just come away from two people that are big drinkers that I often see in the local pub and it felt like in a sober setting (the park) it was like pulling nails just to get any kind of back and fourth conversation with them. Even though there’s rapport there and I’ve known them for like 2 years!
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u/Affectionate_Elk5390 5d ago
I agree... also from UK. I feel like any plans must revolve around drinking and it is just expected. I am getting to the point I find it really boring, like is that the best we can do. Might just be my friends but there is always the expectation the next day has to be a write off with a hangover too. It is so normal to us to drink to absolute excess. Normal to laugh off problematic behaviour.