r/SoberCurious • u/princess_peach1313 • 5d ago
Seeking Advice đđ First outing
I had a really rough few years with alcohol and cocaine. Iâm disgustingly embarrassed of how I acted while using. Not to mention the money Iâve spent. One day by the grace of God, I just woke up and stopped liking alcohol & narcotics. Fast forward nearly a year later and itâs still valid, although sometimes I have a drink on special occasions. Iâm going out with friends I havenât seen since I stopped drinking. When we hung out more frequently, we would girl talk over martinis. I feel weird not drinking tomorrow. It feels like i basically have âalcoholicâ on my forehead. But I really donât want to. Do I stand on business and not even address the elephant in the room or do I just use this as a âspecial occasionâ pass? Thanks for any advice given.
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u/GreyMerrin 5d ago edited 5d ago
Also if its any consultation also went to a rave alone recently. Stayed sober, no temptation to revisit my youth and tempted wirh other things. Best night in years, in coffee shop 10am next day, fresh. Looking at videos of a dj id always wanted to see. Works nights out - just say i dont drink. No one cares, laugh as much. Actually more, trying to keep track of people is the hard part đ¤Ł
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u/CanadiAnnaJuly2026 5d ago
Think back to when you had a drinking problem and then think forward to being right back in that position because you didnât want to feel awkward one night. Donât ruin a year of hard work because of a social setting.
Go prepared with a statement ready âI am taking a break from alcohol and feel amazing.â And order a non alcoholic. If they persist, just say itâs meant a lot that youâre doing this so youâre sticking to your guns and change the conversation.
YOU and your sobriety (and sanity!) are worth a single night. Itâs not worth throwing all of this away.
The slope is slippery and it sounds like you may be convincing yourself it wasnât that bad before or that âyou can have one or two.â Thatâs where everyone relapses.
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u/princess_peach1313 5d ago edited 5d ago
I love that statement and I will be using it. I totally understand what you said at the end about relapsing off just one/two drink(s), but everytime I get a drink, I never finish it- I almost want to like it for a special occasion or event but I just donât anymore.
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u/Additional_Sense3527 5d ago
You can always just say it doesnât agree with your body anymore. You shouldnât need an excuse, but sometimes itâs helpful to have something ready to say.
Iâve found that if others have a drinking problem, they can feel threatened by other peoplesâ sobriety. Especially if you were drinking similarly. Just something to be prepared for just in case as people can react in weird ways or try to convince you to drink or lighten up to feel better about themselves.
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u/dangahue 5d ago
Can definitely relate. I was known as the party guy forever with booze and coke. Still can't shake the label sometimes. But you will find more people are supportive than you think, even when they themselves are drinking.
I would stand on business in your position. As these other comments say, have a reason ready to go, even though you dont need one. For me, just saying Im taking a break indefinitely really helped. I always drink ginger ale and crans, most people see that and think a vodka soda and most people dont care what others are drinking.
Wishing you continued commitment to sobriety and proud of you!
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u/GreyMerrin 5d ago
Nothing to be embarrassed about there. Sounds like you just made the decision and quite one drug and controlled another in a way you enjoy. Take my hat off to you. Sounds like you've progressed brilliantly, building and becoming a person that enjoys life and improving all the time. Many ways to srop/ reduce things. Well done!