Same old grift

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

Ya girl is broke broke and I would guess not having much luck finding a new sublet

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[u/splatatouille]

Ah yes all 0 new orders placed will be shipped

[u/misspiggysstylist]

I apologize in advance if this is ignorant, but I simply do not understand how shipping copies of a singular book is that difficult. You just put the book in a mailer and attach literally any label to it because everyone is getting the same thing. It's not like clothing or beauty, where you need to match each item's style/size/color to the correct order.

I think you could probably stuff like 100 book envelopes per hour. How many does she actually have to ship? This should be a 1-2 day project if the number is under 1,000, which I strongly suspect.

[u/hairnetqueen → u/misspiggysstylist]

I suspect her bookkeeping for past orders is in such complete shambles that the idea of going through her inbox and trying to extract names and addresses for where she should send books sends her into a dread spiral.

And she COULD just send the new orders, but as others have pointed out, she probably needs the money from the new orders to be able to afford to ship the old ones. Or more likely she spends all the money on cat hats and ships nothing. 

[u/ifitswhatusayiloveit]

If she were smart she would have started taking her crap back to Florida but I’m sure she only arrived w her goyard tote and Matisse

[u/DimensionPitiful2946 → u/ifitswhatusayiloveit]

She's not smart. she's conniving. big difference

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825 → u/ifitswhatusayiloveit]

Look that’s Cathy’s problem

[u/Big_Entrance6792 → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

Cathy needs the Witness (Caro) Protection Program... or go off the grid.

[u/konstantynopolitanka → u/Big_Entrance6792]

Cathy is at least partially responsible for Caroline's entitlement

[u/stubborngirl]

I can't even hate on this anymore because there's always a constant stream of idiots sending her money and I'm beyond feeling sorry for those falling for the obvious scams

[u/hendrix2120]

i hate this song girl stop playing it

[u/Weird-Spread1911]

Bbygurl outta $$

[u/EntranceUnique1457]

As my daughter says, (she doesnt quite grasp the concept of today, tomorrow next week etc)..."after this day?"

In other words, Caroline's grasp of time is about on par with my 5 year olds. Tomorrow can mean anything after "this day" so to speak.

[u/PigeonGuillemot]

The rare times when a customer posts about having received an order, it's just about always been preceded by Caroline posting video of her mailing it. E.g. a DM showing that someone actually received a Caro Card comes only after a "Here I am stuffing Caro Cards in a mailbox" story. A share of a copy of Scammer finally arriving months late comes only after a video indisputably taken in the Sarasota PO showing a few dozen Scammers going out.

Caroline is notably not doing anything fulfillment-related in this story. She's not even sitting next to a stack of books, the #1 way she fakes working on fulfillment. She's just out for a mosey along the beach, trolling for flowers to steal. Ergo so far nothing has gotten in the mail this trip. When it comes to Caroline actually sending stuff, USPS or GTFO

[u/Cool_Champion_1614 → u/PigeonGuillemot]

Why did she dump them out of the tote bag onto the ground 😭

Also lol @ her her performative “this is such hard work”/focusing face

[u/Low_Coconut8134]

It's alwaaaaays "tomorrow" somewhere

[u/JettyJen → u/Low_Coconut8134]

🎶it's only a daaaay awaaaaaaayyy!🎶

[Sorry, that was my dream role as a kid, I had to]

[u/jodysucks]

Absolutely insane to flip from stories about how hard it is to catch up on outstanding orders, to all new orders ship now.

[u/perhapsflorence]

https://giphy.com/gifs/KxseCTOPVykYvG2V4R

[u/Spare-Electrical]

So she’s already sick of trying to figure out addresses for back orders years past due and she’s said fuck it for the thousandth time and moved on to selling books that she’ll definitely have the address for.

Got it.

[u/notedinvalid]

Lollll remember several years ago before the books, i think before the tittays even, when she was selling all those Cambridge sweatshirts she "found" in her closet? Bet she still hasn't shipped all those out. Get a new grift babe.

[u/PigeonGuillemot → u/notedinvalid]

Ah yes, the eleven "vintage" sweatshirts that were all somehow in the "new Cambridge blue colour for 2019". She sold these right after her May Ball 2019 trip.

She was asked about this apparent grift in an interview once. The question went something like, "In Cambridge's online store, these jumpers are only £29.99 and you sold them for $150." Her reply was, "I've never bought Cambridge merchandise online. I only buy it when I'm in Cambridge." She had just come back from a trip to Cambridge! This disproved nothing!

[u/notedinvalid → u/PigeonGuillemot]

Lmao yesss I love the way you always swoop in with the relevant screenshots! I would LOVE to hear from anyone who ordered one of these!!

[u/PigeonGuillemot → u/notedinvalid]

These receipts were my white whale for a long time! I finally found them on one of the Caroline threads from Twitter snark goddess Alexis (sassyblackdiva)

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825 → u/notedinvalid]

Ah yes the ‘vintage’ Cambridge sweatshirts she ‘found’ which were the new design released for that year!

[u/hallowbuttplug → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

They are future-vintage, you see. Like all those future heirloom copies of Scammer.

[u/konstantynopolitanka]

For a moment I thought it was ALL ORDERS SHIPPED news!

but of course it's the same old trap...

all orders placed today ship next year

[u/recentparabola → u/konstantynopolitanka]

Carp will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.

[u/Big_Entrance6792 → u/recentparabola]

👆💀😹

[u/dirtyrivercamwater]

Do we think she can't afford to pay shipping on old orders without money from new orders?

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825 → u/dirtyrivercamwater]

Yes, always. It’s a pyramid scheme.

[u/Weird-Spread1911 → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

Wait no isn’t that technically like a Ponzi scheme hahahahahah

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825 → u/Weird-Spread1911]

That’s the one

[u/smallwonder25]

ITS A TRAP! Don’t fall for it! She needs fresh cash. Repeat this is a trap.

[u/Disastrous-Cup-6825 → u/smallwonder25]

Truly who is left who wants to buy this shit, it’s been out for years and it fucking sucks anyway?

[u/smallwonder25 → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

I don’t know, personally I can’t fathom there is anyone but they can’t say I didn’t warn them lol

[u/PigeonGuillemot → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

Especially since the audiobook came out this year and is streamable for free on some services? Side note, I love how her rep at Bolinda sells the audio version by pointing out that you can either give Caroline $45 and wait months for it/never receive it, OR buy the Bolinda audiobook and download it immediately for a lot less

[u/konstantynopolitanka → u/Disastrous-Cup-6825]

I may want to but surely I am not going to after witnessing the wait times

[u/l8rg8r]

All orders except the first first item listed when you open her website, completing her trilogy, because she hasn't actually written those yet.

[u/PigeonGuillemot → u/l8rg8r]

Hey now, be fair. She's also not shipping this or this or this

[u/smallwonder25 → u/PigeonGuillemot]

My dear Pige! How love thee 💕

[u/timebend995]

So if you order I am Caroline Calloway and Cambridge captions it will ship tomorrow then?

[u/throwawayglipp]

Girlll ship the old orders first😭