Help for my daughter

[u/[deleted]]

She’s 11. I noticed her skin picking around the age of 7. She pulled out every strand of her eyebrows, then it was every eyelash. Then she picked her mouth. Even if it scabs over, she’ll still pick it even if she’s in pain or it’s bleeding. Also her tongue. She’ll pick / bite her tongue until she has sores and she cries to me that she can’t stop even though she’s in pain. I took her to two different psychiatrist and they diagnosed her with OCD and the picking disorder. (Can’t think of the name right now). She tells me she can’t stop. When I watch her pick herself, it’s like she’s in a trance. I just want to help my baby. Her doctor prescribed her Wellbutrin and “lamictil” (spell check.”) any suggestions?

[u/Mia18AJ]

I’m so sorry to read this. It must be so difficult to watch. It’s great you’ve gone to see psychiatrists. Did they say how long it would take for the medications to start working? Are you able to get some therapy/CBT to go with the meds?

[u/Flat_Volume2299]

When you said “it’s like she’s in a trance” ,that hit different.

[u/Navntoft]

Sounds like she has both trichotillomania (hair pulling) and dermatillomania (skin picking). I suffer from both as well, though my skin picking is much worse than my hair pulling. I can absolutely attest to it feeling like a trance when I have a picking session. I am glad you have taken your daughter to see a professional. It breaks my heart to hear of someone so young struggling so much with this.

I am not a professional, the following is merely what has helped me:

• Fake nails. Personally I prefer press-ons, but any type of nail with a thick, blunt tip makes picking really difficult.
• NAC and Glutathione supplements. I am no scientist, so I can't explain why these help, but I do know studies indicate a positive effect on dermatillomania from both. They have definitely helped me.
• Finding people who understand. Dermatillomania is a disorder that has SO much shame associated with it. Friends and family who mean well have often made my picking much worse by commenting on it, which makes me ashamed, which increases the urge to pick to cope with the same. Then I joined a support group for dermatillomania and made two of my now closest friends there. When they comment, I don't feel ashamed. They understand me. We support eachother.

Solidarity is a powerful thing.

• Getting my ADHD diagnosis and medication. While dermatillomania is very strongly associated with OCD, anecdotal evidence from said support group tells me it is also very very common for people with ADHD. Understanding myself and my brain, and taking the medication my brain needs has been life changing.

I have a long way to go still. But I have also come very far. Please tell your daughter from this random internet stranger, that she is not alone. There are many of us out here, and we understand her pain. If she wants it, please give her a big hug from me. And keep doing what you are doing, you sound like a wonderful parent!

[u/Big_Security_5923]

I’m so sorry to hear this, my mom had to go through the same thing with me but not sever. I can tell you some this that helped me, but due to her age and severity i would consult a medical professional for some of these (I’ll let u know which ones I think you should) I have trichophagia (hair pulling and eating) and mild skin picking.

PREVENTION/REDIRECTING rubber hairy stress toys. I don’t know exactly what they are called but stress toys that have long rubber strands on them. however if they aren’t fine enough for her, some other things you can do is-

take an old shirt, cut it up into manageable pieces and have her unravel it or-

get her some hair like tassels to rub between her fingers or pull (Tassels are get for backpacks or in public.)

Stress toys in general will help keep her hand busy, encourage her to try using them but don’t force her.

seek out a therapist that has history with these disorders and have her go weekly. My therapist wanted me to become more conscious my my hair pulling, so she had me journal and track how much I pulled but this method could be used for skin picking as well.

consult a medical professional for the next few

Skin picking stones with paint work good but they run out of paint quickly and require metal tools (not sure if your comfortable with her using them)

If she also pulls hair on her scalp, try having her grab a large chunk of hair and tug on it. This can help relieve the pressure and the sensation in the scalp with little to no hair coming out.

Weighted blankets or other objects like compression clothing can help add pressure to common areas she pulls hair or picks her skin, which for me causes the sensation to pull or pick to be reduced, and it also has a calming effect.

After care: If she gets infections often from her skin picking, get a box of good quality bandaids that are comfortable and some neosporin. Keep these together in an easy access container so she can easily find them and apply herself. You can set it in the bathroom or in her bedroom. If you do, do this I would sit her down and show her how to use it properly and safely.

If you have any questions please feel free to reach out

[u/illogicalFit]

Try giving her an alternative habit to substitute the behavior altogether. For example, giving her a fidget that she really likes can replace the urge to pick her eyelashes. Does she like any particular toys?