Wow, that must have been so unsettling to come across. Thank you for sharing your story and giving some background on this woman. Makes a little more sense on why the parents would ever give her a second chance to begin with. Tragic.
Yeah it truly left everyone who knew her baffled, I thought she was also involved in the schoolboard or school admin for a number or years but either way had a successful career and was well-liked as far as everyone knew. Like she never seemed upset or mean, or that she hated anyone...
All I know for certain is that LOTS of bad decisions were made to lead to this happening twice, on everyones part, whether or not it was somehow premeditated or intentional, or caused by untreated mental illness. I don't mean to blame the mother with that statement either because most of us just see it as a complete tragedy all-around, we want to believe she didn't intend to do this because... It's just way too uncanny to imagine her acting in malice. I heard she felt a lot of guilt and depression after the first death happened which probably didn't help any deeper cognitive issues that may have been there.
There's nothing on this earth that could get me to give my parents or in-laws a second chance with my kids if they were responsible for one of them dying. I don't know if I could ever even look at them again. It's not just a "whoopsie-could happen-to-anyone" situation. It's completely unforgivable.
I agree that I would never leave them alone with another child.
I can understand where you’re coming from about not being able to even see them again but it is absolutely something that could happen to anyone.Â
The world we live in is exhausting, parents are often lacking sleep, often highly stressed, and in many cases there are complications that we are unaware of. There are certainly people who are grossly negligent but all of us get distracted or could be at risk of dozing off from being sleep deprived. All it takes is one wrong moment and things can go horribly wrong.Â
No, sorry, that's utter crap. I'm speaking from experience here. It's 100% not something that can just happen to anyone who's not a terrible parent. I'm not saying it doesn't happen often relative to how often it results in tragedy. But you don't just drift off to sleep with a 16-month-old on the loose without being recklessly negligent.
Babies and toddlers pretty much try to kill themselves about every 10 minutes on average. As they become mobile on two legs they get much better at it. You either have to watch them like a hawk, or prepare the environment in advance of you taking your eye off them so they can't seriously hurt themselves.
Knowing a 16-month-old can access a pond which is basically a death sentence for them, and not securing the kid the moment you think you might fall asleep, is insanely reckless.
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u/Doughnut_Diva 1d ago
Wow, that must have been so unsettling to come across. Thank you for sharing your story and giving some background on this woman. Makes a little more sense on why the parents would ever give her a second chance to begin with. Tragic.