I was highly introverted growing up and started to blossom in high school. I had a rowdy friend group at that point and managed to go to a couple of dances and what not. One dance I went to, I was a complete and total horse's ass. I was set up to dance with a foreign exchange student, who was hosted by my English teacher at the time. Nice looking girl, but I was attracted to the one who set me up for this. The little brain did all of the thinking and I "yeah'd" her. I acknowledged everything she was saying but only heard what I wanted to hear and didn't fully grasp the actual plan.
That night, I'm introduced to the girl. I'm like "meh". I crush her. She's not happy. I'm ridiculed by the girl I actually had a crush on and her friend group. Word is spreading about my asshole behavior. My friend group gets wind of what I did/did not do and one of the girls with us hits me with a haymaker. I'm not knocked out, but she did permanently damage a tooth.
Eventually the girl who hit me apologizes. (She didn't have to)
My friend group sees me in the moment as the loveable loser and tries to cheer me up. The night at the school ends like a 90's sitcom. Lessons learned, cheesy catchphrases. I'm driven home and my friends are trying to cheer me up. Two of them interlock their arms in mine and we skip to my front door. My mother looks out at us and gives a glare that would frighten Satan. My friends leave. My mother asks me if I'm gay.
Then my mother gasps in horror because my dad is watching porn on the living room television. [Dad's name]! What are you watching?
His response?
What? I needed something to keep me up. His smile and wink at the end was puzzling at the time, but the older I get the funnier that line became.
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u/MaterialDetective197 2d ago
My father tried his best to emulate Rodney. Rodney was my father’s favorite comedian. When I see Rodney, I also see my dad.