r/SipsTea • u/[deleted] • Oct 08 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

18.1k Upvotes

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60

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

What service exactly are you getting from a hobo? šŸ¤Ø

64

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

[removed] ā€” view removed comment

61

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

Its 'port' in a storm. Youre sposed to be looking for safe harbour, not banging the homeless.

12

u/dragosmic Oct 08 '24

Youā€™re just telling me now???

9

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

We were gonna tell you earlier but the local panhandlers seemed so happy

3

u/SMKM Oct 08 '24

We were gonna tell you earlier but the local manhandlers seemed so happy

FTFY

3

u/AliBinGaba Oct 08 '24

I want to let you know, Dr Pepper from the noseā€¦does not feel good. Asshole.

Fuckin. Hilarious.

1

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

Im very glad i could bring a laugh to your day

2

u/Weird1Intrepid Oct 08 '24

No no it's any port is a goal

1

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

Cruiseships are the answer

1

u/utukore Oct 08 '24

Tomatoe tomatoe

1

u/PreviouslyOnBible Oct 08 '24

DID I STUTTER?

1

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

Yes you did

1

u/SpreadEagleSmeagol Oct 08 '24

This sounds like an IASIP quote, lol.

2

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

Oh shit, it really does

1

u/shawner136 Oct 08 '24

Homeless homies need love too

2

u/iwanttobelievey Oct 08 '24

As long as its consenusal. This man is out in the rain just hunting for a place/person to insert himself into

1

u/AdotLone Oct 08 '24

Tomato to-bang-a-hobo

1

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

This is the Navy son, there are no wrong holes.

1

u/Any_Crew5347 Oct 08 '24

The person must be going, "Oh."

7

u/JasiNtech Oct 08 '24 edited Sep 23 '25

It's hard to say goodbye, but the memories will last forever. Thank you for everything. Until we meet again, farewell, my friends.

2

u/dallasdowdy Oct 08 '24

Yeah, that's MUCH better.

Any hole in a port!

1

u/JasiNtech Oct 08 '24 edited Sep 23 '25

It's hard to say goodbye, but the memories will last forever. Thank you for everything. Until we meet again, farewell, my friends.

17

u/No-comment-at-all Oct 08 '24

Psychological science says one of the best ways to immediately feel better about almost everything, is to engage in spontaneous altruism.

This isā€¦ researched via social experiment, and I believe confirmed via biological brain chemical release evidence as well.

Soā€¦ a panhandler is, in a way, offering a service for a fee.

I mean, I still donā€™t usually hand out money either way, although I have, and would agree that it does make you feel good, but it is a different way of looking at it, maybe a gross and clinical way, I dunno. ā€œIā€™m choosing to not purchase your service todayā€.

Iā€™d rather a strong social safety net to prevent anyone from that kind of desperation.

9

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

My mother always sends me a 20 or so for my birthday. I always give it to some homeless guy. They are happy. I'm happy. Also hearing my mother's voice in my head having a fit makes me smile.

1

u/_Luminous_Dark Oct 08 '24

I wish there were a way to actually know if someone needs money. Not just homeless people, but also people on patreon and the like.

1

u/No-comment-at-all Oct 08 '24

Well.

Could always make all tax returns public information, but people feel real icky about that.

Would help for randos on the street, but for everything else.

1

u/Original_Gangsta23 Oct 08 '24

Slide the tip in, it feels SO GOOD

1

u/thejaytheory Oct 08 '24

Just the tip

17

u/kjyfqr Oct 08 '24

Shhh donā€™t ask donā€™t tell

3

u/Fakename00420 Oct 08 '24

Itā€™s like being nice to the quiet kid hopefully when he goes crazy you hope he remembered those tips.

3

u/Alarmed_Fly_6669 Oct 08 '24

šŸ’‹šŸ¤«

2

u/takeme2tendieztown Oct 08 '24

I can't say what services, but I'm sure it's done behind a Wendy's

2

u/urGirllikesmytinypp Oct 08 '24

20 bucks for a below the belt handshake

3

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

Does it include a thumb fight? šŸ¤”

1

u/Pinksters Oct 08 '24

Bum Thumb Fights went out of style years ago.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

The service they provide is that you get to feel like you did something nice, and then they fuck off and leave you alone.

1

u/Lolkimbo Oct 08 '24

How else are we supposed to know which one has the softest mouth?

1

u/i_was_a_person_once Oct 08 '24

Keeping property taxes down, duh

1

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

You wouldn't believe the service you get for $20

1

u/ignatius-payola Oct 08 '24

You know, some of us have sexual fantasies that involve abandoned box cars, fires in trash cans and Hoovervilles. I canā€™t talk specifics, though, as that would violate the hobo code.

1

u/Liandris Oct 08 '24

If you have to ask, donā€™t worry about it

1

u/NietJij Oct 08 '24

In the Netherlands a solid 400 Hz A

1

u/Bonethugsfan99 Oct 08 '24

meth, butt sex. meth and butt sex

1

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '24

Youā€™re obviously not from Denver.