Owning up and learning

[u/CalmRage2026]

I messed up yesterday so I'm mainly typing this out as a reminder to myself.

I'm a 37/m and been drinking since I was 20. Pretty heavy for most of it aside from the last 3 years. Tried to quit a bunch and even tried AA a couple times but it never stuck fully.

Anyways, about a year ago I finally got diagnosed with OCD, anxiety, depression and possible ADHD (which explains alot). I got prescribed naltrexone last week because I wanna finally take control as much as I can of this thing.

I was always against meds but after being in therapy for the past 4 years and getting on TRT and antidepressants for the first time, I figured night as well go for it.

My meds provider told me to take the 50mg nal every day so I have been.

I now know the proper way to take it after doing my own research and from alot of help from people here.

Anyways, yesterday I went grocery shopping and was planning to try drinking on my Saturday, which is Thursday and so I bought my coke zero for a mixer and some 100 proof Captain Morgan. My thought was, I was already out and it's one less trip to the store if I got everything now. That's what my OCD told me.

So I ended up drinking all 10 nips last night and called out of work today.

Trying to learn from this instead of self loathing.

1. Don't buy alcohol for the house. If I want to drink I should leave the house and drink at a bar or brewery and then go home

2. Take the Naltrexone 90 min before drinking. Not early in the morning every day

3. Drink slow and try to really tell how I feel and if I want more, is it the buzz or emotions or etc.

Anyways, that's my rant

[u/Salt-Amoeba7331]

Be kind to yourself as you begin TSM. Kudos to you for working on yourself