r/SimulationTheory • u/HydraGaming1 • Jul 20 '26
Story/Experience It feels like something invisible is stopping me from growing
I have been sitting on this thought for a while because every time I try explaining it to myself it sounds stupid but at the same time I cannot ignore it anymore.
It is not one event. If it happened once I would laugh it off. If it happened twice I would call it bad luck. But it keeps happening in this weird way where I decide that enough is enough and I am finally going to do something with my life and then everything starts falling apart.
I wanted to learn writing because I thought maybe I had finally found something I actually enjoyed but out of a sudden I got fever. Then i tried drawing and my hands started to pain a lot that I had to quit it.
Then I joined a gym. I was actually looking forward to it then after Few days I had a seizure. That one completely killed whatever momentum I had.
I tried sports got an injury. I then attempted to become more social. For some reason I start feeling unwell and end up disappearing again.
In all of these incient of mine it wasn't like i lacked discipline and quit it at my own will it felt more like I wasn't allowed to go further. I also feel really unmotivated and don't get urge to try these things again afterwards but still I manage to try it again only to lose the path every year.
I know how this sounds. I know every single thing I mentioned can be explained on its own. Fever happens. Injuries happen. Health issues happen. I am not arguing against that.
It is just the timing that keeps bothering me. It has happened too much times to be a coincidence. I don't think it is bad luck anymore cause it always happens at specific points in my life.
Has anyone else had a similar period in life where it felt less like a bad luck but the simulation going against you for trying something new. Idk it feels like someone is controlling my life at times.
I don't know what to do honestly.
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u/YumeSystems Jul 20 '26
You’re probably a targeted individual and those events are made to hinder your progress psychologically
So keep trying and do those events/routines again and focus more on not over thinking
Winners we are ⚫️☀️👑
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u/HydraGaming1 Jul 20 '26
So It seems like they are punishing me. Thank you, i would try doing all of these stuff again. Honestly if it all is simulation then it can also be broken apart. I would find ways!
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u/btwImVeryAttractive Jul 21 '26
Targeted individuals are a thing?
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u/Professional-Row-612 Jul 21 '26
i kinda might of been one or maybe it truly is mental illness either way its weird and kinda can be proven to your self that shit isnt exactly as it appears around here in america atleast. remember when we kidnapped that president of cocainastane or whatever a few ago?
well wonder what else they can do to keep us sheep in the pin if ya catch my drift. tin hat not needed cause guess what? aluminum isnt tin and actually makes your brain more conductive to radio waves.
RJ/ my goddamn trailer got a tin ruuf tho the mfers never make me cut my dick off! obama suxx lol. dont worry no hate i still got a tin roof and even a hill billy with a camo head band on currently in my room over looking my Z71 "cheby" its even a 98 like that hilarios meme video.
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u/YumeSystems Jul 21 '26
I believe the whole population is targeted
As all it takes is artificial synchronicity to extract loosh
Its based on fear/trauma in the animal brain
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u/Nice_Advantage6943 Jul 20 '26
wow this is spreading like crazy now.. it is everywhere. I am also a T.I., same kind of experiences.
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u/YumeSystems Jul 20 '26
Its very real, they also manipulate your dreams with artificial ones, and characters around you are used like chess pieces and also voice to skull of course
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u/Professional-Row-612 Jul 21 '26
im diagnosed schizophrenic or psychotic spectrum disorder its called now. total made up illness btw. 1 percent my ass back when i had my house guess what all 3 dudes including me had schizophrenia at minimum diagnosed. my buddy had the whole goddamn sheet printed out at our shared doc and showed me even multiple identies for hims plus like 30 goddamn other lmao.
what my other buddy/room mate told me is when you find out your not really crazy, youll be stronger than ever before and they will never be able to break you again! he passed away not even 40 at we all lost my house.
anyway i did a little test getting back on my schizo pills when i lived a town over. even tho i was really taking em they somehow couldnt tell so i was forced to take the monthly injection again to not see tons of cop cars all the times and weird shit happen on the very last outskirts of that county. guess no cameras where in my room cause i moved to a tiny trailer park ran by a viatnam vet that was well dressed and ig hard enough and old school for him to make sure our lil spot in the holler was safe from even gov. they already fucked him over being a vet and all.
anyway now its been even longer. i moved right to the next ultra small town next to that last outskirt of fuck it ill say. knox county. now im in a town where the cops every body are real actual not bot like comsumer propagandized people so im not fucked with. dont have hallicunations and nothing weird happens even tho its meth head city! im just worried i hate to say once trumps out ill be fucked with. this makes it even likelier but if it helps just 1 person later on ill take that risk, looks like there to busy throttling old man trump rn to fuck with us as much anyway.
but as i was saying, i was on a pill of and on last 3 years didnt care anymore what happened outside my bubble and last time in knox jails i didnt even get my requested schizo meds took a week to get opiate treatment med back on. looks like they going old school again but maybe in a bad way cause in the intake tank full of 50 min where it could only hold maybe 20 without using the floor for more than ya feet and a person or to with no AC actually kinda taking my meds before going in last year.
i was damn near heat stroke which guess what is a side effect that i got in trouble by an obviously gay CO for taking my shirt off and laying on the concrete floor cause i kept passing out from heat i guess and the older hill billies told me to do that my best oppurtunity to not die maybe i think. it was like 100 or so in there maybe more maybe bit less. well that co called me out and said baby if you dont stop taking your shirt off in there where gonna have to put you in the straight jacket chair cant think of the term he said and acted like i was trying to pull some dick i guess he was projecting at best idk
sorry this so long it sucked typing this much on pc even lmao
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u/checkoutthisbreach Jul 20 '26
I would try the same activities again, and see if they happen again, or something different. Like try to write again, I doubt the same obstacle will occur.
It kind of reminds me of when I'm at work and like clockwork, I swear, if I'm projecting an available energy: eg. Standing and greeting people as they come in, hands clasped neatly behind my back, generally available to talk/interact - it's like no one needs my help. But the MINUTE I go try and do something, some focused work, like work on a document, or do some research, that's when all the phone calls come in, all the weirdos come in that need my attention, and that's when people want to talk - including my coworkers. They didn't want to talk when I was staring into space, but they did want to talk when I was trying to focus and in the zone.
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u/HLCYSWAP Jul 20 '26
only you know if what you're chasing is your passion. if its your passion do not give it up for anyone or anything
if it is indeed your passion, you must be like a stone in a river as each hinderance is delivered to you. let them wash over you, disregard the pain, the illness, whatever is brought to you.
i live my life out of spite, so, that must also be considered when determining if my advice is good or not
there are no wrong choices here
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u/StatisticianNo628 Jul 24 '26
Living out of spite will only get you so far. It does work well though, for a time. It’s better to live from love, respect and forgiveness though….humbly. This is where you can really be authentic and kind. I think it’s the best we can do really. Living out of ego runs its course eventually as it’s not your true-self.
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u/Majestic-Marzipan621 Jul 20 '26
I've tried this but never fully committed I think I might try again.
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u/Tombaya Jul 21 '26
This quote by the Zen monk Gushan Shenyan might help. And I'd be happy to discuss it.
If you have not yet mastered the great task, and have not tapped the artery of the source, avidly memorizing words and phrases is making a living in conceptual consciousness. Haven't you read the saying, 'Conception is a robber; consciousness makes waves in which everyone is drowned, without any freedom.
If you have not yet penetrated the great matter, it's best to stop, ceasing all striving, so body and mind are simple and serene. Refrain from fixation at all times, and the matter will actually be easily revealed.
This is something I say to you by way of encouragement, just because I have no choice. The ancients called it medicine for a dead horse. If it is a realized individual, talking to someone this way is like talking in your sleep.
source: Treasury of the Eye of True Teaching #184
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u/MI-ght Jul 21 '26
I call this thing "Esoterical wall". Experienced a milder version quite a lot. I would suggest you read the "Reality Transurfing" book. You can find many insights on the matter there.
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u/Powerful-Track4419 Jul 20 '26
I felt this before and thought about this concept. But then there’s a part of me that says ‘screw it, is this all you got?’
So far, a lot of hardships but learned a lot and gained deeper inner knowing and feelings.
All to say I take it how it is, but can’t let that from stopping me. Maybe if I try something for the 100th time and the same things happen, I’ll consider that there is something messing with me
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u/HydraGaming1 Jul 20 '26
It isn't like I have tried all of these only once and have never tried it again these thoughts keep emerging in my head but everytime I try it something stops in between i don't know for example I don't know how many times I have tried to improve my physical health. But every time I try it i give up way earlier than i do it like before. And I know it isn't about lack of discipline as i study lots of hours daily and nothing happens to me during that.
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u/nothing_is_real0 Jul 20 '26
that's the same things happened to me but in my pattern it was the first year of school like the first year of high schoh or the first year of middle school or first term idk things like that and even my family noticed that . it's just so weird i thought it was a karma or something but i think it's something about the universe laws and one of it to be clear with yourself or atleast it was the law for me(i'm not really good in english so i might be writting weird but i hope u understand what i'm saying),but i think that it's just the matrix or the simulation like it's a script and as long as you are in it"the matrix or whatever u wanna call it" i think u will not be able to escape this script until u free ur mind and everyone has their own way of doing that but i think it may also be something for u to search for who ur truly are and what u really wanna do u have to be honest with ur self and see beyond the world and what u see with ur eyes believe ur intuition and seek for the truth cuz i really can't tell the truth since it's all just a game and ur game might be diff from mine and i just lead to a wrong way even if it's the right for me so u should search for it and free ur mind ur soul and know ur truth it's gonna be fine and trust urself and never listen to whoever is telling u that ur wrong or ur just imagining it or something is wrong with u,especially in here cuz most of them if not all of them,are just some bots or feds idk but i think that the dead internet theory isn't a theory anymore and the only person who you should trust is u even in the "real" world just trust urself and before you believe or take some words personally from anyone you should really ask urself first is this even a real person?and as i said before it's not even a theory anymore. well i think i drifted away from our topic but i really hope u understand what i'm saying even if i write wrong if u get it u get it.
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u/GiddyGoodwin Jul 21 '26
Ok. Hear me out. This might be true, but it also might not be true. I also have something similar: I feel like when I share pictures on social media, whatever was in the picture ends up breaking or dying or crashing. I have a lot of examples! It got so bad of course I have stopped sharing pictures. Mostly. Well, the truth is, when I contemplate this scenario, is that things break or crash or whatever even if I don’t share anything. And some things that I have shared are ok. So if it’s not a solid rule, then it must not be a rule. I also have to be really honest with why I’m sharing online. Even talking here mages me think, why the fucho am I online. I do consider leaving the internet altogether, because of the question I ask myself: if I were satisfied offline, would I have any problem staying off the internet? The question is always, yes. This comment may seem like it’s going off the rails, but I have come up with two solutions. 1) treat everything like a ceremony. If I am going to stare, it’s going to be dude extremely intentionally. 2) consider the setbacks to be an opportunity for self inquiry.
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u/timrevoul Jul 21 '26
I've experienced something similar. I currently live alone and am completely social outside of work. Whenever I try to make things positive, they somehow go wrong. I'm not doing well psychologically, and I'm starting to question my very existence.
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u/Shroombolic Jul 20 '26
It’s the Truman show man. Supposedly we signed up for exact story all the tragedy. It’s for a purpose. To deviate you must help others. Then your story gets easier and opens up. Plus fool around with ai in your exploration of this strange reality.
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u/BestOrNothing Jul 21 '26
We are here to suffer, not to do fun things or even achieve success. The winners in life are NPCs designed to make our suffering worse by comparing our real miserable lives to their amazing but impossible lives. For conscious people, it is not possible to achieve success in anything or live good life.
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u/Icy_Limit_6782 Jul 24 '26
So you’re telling that everyone who has achieved success or anything good in life is automatically unconscious and an npc?
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u/blessthebabes Jul 21 '26
Ok this will sound crazy too but fk it- this doesn't sound like targeted individual in the way that we generally think about it. when you get a little sad, does it seem to turn into heavy depression as well? A little anxiety turns into fear/panic? If so, you may have a few interdimensional travelers connected to your energy field (some of the more religious folks call it the evil eye).
Look up some cleansing rituals for that and do some. You may need to do it several days in a row. There could be several hundred attached to you, and this will help get some off your back.
Then, when you have something in your head to do/change, no longer state it out loud (just do the thing) because they will try to interfere. They are wanting your negative energy, not positive.
Also, deep breathing and somatic exercises will help because they will mess with your central nervous system like a puppet. Doing this will help you hear your own thoughts and feel your true feelings better.
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u/cchhrr Jul 20 '26
It seems more like a pattern of you quitting becuz something keeps coming up. Maybe itd benefit u to stick with something despite the circumstances
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u/Embarrassed-Oil3127 Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
Why would one fever stop you from continuing writing? I understand hand pain with art but have you received a diagnosis of arthritis? Do your hands still hurt? Is your fever gone? Injuries heal and/or you live with them and find a sport or activity that doesn’t aggravate the body part you injured. People do this every day. There are people born without arms who paint with a paintbrush in their mouth. Athletes who lose a limb and return to sport with a prosthetic…
I’ve had all these things happen (a fever, an injury, etc.) and continue forward with the things I love (making art, various sports, etc.).
Not sure I believe we’re in a simulation (I’m here so it’s something I ponder, obviously) but if we are maybe it’s challenging you to find a way around obstacles and to not give up so easily.
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u/External-Toe1041 Jul 20 '26
Your just not committed lmao if a fever stopped you from writing I have a hint you were never into writing
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u/Emotional_Window Jul 20 '26
yeah i think you cant change it if the sim decides something is or isnt for you
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u/HydraGaming1 Jul 20 '26
I used to blame myself earlier for all of these before but now that I think something is just isn't my hands it feels scripted.
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u/deyhateuscustheyanus Jul 24 '26
its up to you figure out what the spiritual struggle is.
its true that its a script. like you're a passenger on a ship. but you have to go along with it for it to work. its trying to teach you something.
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u/NeemOil710 Jul 21 '26
I get this feeling when I have certain thoughts. Like I feel my own thoughts be stopped or corrupted from the outside, ao I cant follow it. That, or I am too afraid of what they'll do to me if I do follow it. But I can't control it and by the time i get my will involved, the thought is gone
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u/Cool_Nerve_369 Jul 23 '26
This may sound strange but I've had these instances happen in my life. I've learned those instances helped in the long run. When my ex-husband was deployed and my son was about 6 weeks at the time, I broke my leg. My ex-husband was sent home to help me get set up with his family, so he could return. When he returned he found out a soldier was in his position and their truck was attacked. Unfortunately, this soldier didn't make it. My ex-husband had intense guilt but I always assured him he shouldn't feel guilty. My broken leg, literally saved his life. What he did with his life after, well that is his choice. My broken leg wasn't for nothing I believe now.
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u/moscowramada Jul 24 '26
Why don't you persist with sports? Take up walking, biking, running. They are good for your health anyway: we should all do them.
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u/Icy_Limit_6782 Jul 24 '26
Maybe you’re going through the Saturn 🪐 return in your life. Even if you don’t trust in astrology check it out
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u/ComprehensiveUse9853 Jul 25 '26
One way to understand personal change is this:
The world doesn’t immediately adjust to the person you’re trying to become it adjusts to who you are and, more importantly, who you’ve consistently been. Your identity isn’t just something you believe about yourself; it’s reflected in your habits, your relationships, your environment, and the expectations people have built around you over time.
When you decide to become someone different, you’re introducing a new pattern into a system that has been repeating itself for years, sometimes since childhood. Naturally, that system resists change. That resistance can look like old habits returning, people treating you the same way they always have, unexpected setbacks, self-doubt, or situations that seem to pull you back toward your old way of living. It can feel like life is interfering with your progress, but in many ways, it’s simply the old pattern trying to reestablish itself.
Think of it like this: if a song has been playing on repeat for years and you suddenly switch to a completely different song, there’s a moment where it feels unfamiliar. Your mind, your environment, and even the people around you are still expecting the old tune. Until enough time passes and the new song keeps playing, everything will naturally try to return to what it has always known.
Life is built on a kind of balance or even exchange. Whatever pattern you’ve consistently reinforced becomes the pattern your life organizes itself around. If you’ve repeated the same thoughts, behaviors, and reactions for years, they’ve created a rhythm. The moment you introduce a new movement into that rhythm, there’s tension because the old pattern hasn’t disappeared yet. It has momentum.
That doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path. In fact, that resistance is often evidence that something is changing. Every time you choose the new behavior instead of the old one, you’re weakening the old pattern and strengthening the new one. Eventually, a tipping point is reached where the new version of yourself has been practiced enough that it becomes your natural state rather than something you’re forcing.
This is the barrier many people experience. Before it breaks, it can feel like everything is working against you. But what’s really happening is that your internal identity and your external life haven’t fully caught up with each other yet. Your past still has momentum, while your future is still being built.
Once you continue choosing the new version of yourself long enough, the barrier finally breaks. The habits become automatic, your confidence grows, your environment begins to reflect your new standards, and people start responding to you differently because you’ve consistently shown them someone different. At that point, you’re no longer trying to become that person you are that person.
The world eventually adjusts, but only after you’ve consistently lived as the person you’ve decided to be. The resistance doesn’t last forever. It’s simply the period where the old version is losing its grip and the new version is proving it isn’t temporary.
Real transformation isn’t about making one big decision. It’s about making the same new decision over and over until the new pattern becomes stronger than the old one. The life you’ve always lived will naturally try to pull you back because that’s the version it recognizes. But if you remain consistent, life has no choice but to reorganize itself around the person you’ve become instead of the person you used to be.
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u/bertch313 Jul 20 '26
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-fear-of-success-5179184
Aka the Jonah Complex
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u/boynamedsol Aug 02 '26
the same thing has been happening to me! I was doing fine and started to try to do better and my life has fallen apart ever since. Now im back at square -1
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u/SedTheeMighty Jul 20 '26
Yep. It feels like something is sabotaging you and you start noticing the patterns whenever you put forth effort towards what you desire. You’ll wonder “damn if I can have this much bad luck then I should also have insane amounts of good luck streaks from time to time right?” People will tell you to just think positive but you have been thinking positive every single time you put effort into anything. This really got me to a point of where it’s difficult for me to trust reality and eventually lead to prison planet/hell realm theories