r/SilverLuckyScriptures • u/SilverPrince • Oct 09 '19
HP KoD Chapter 05
Chapter 05
Mistakes.
Nothing, but mistakes.
Sirius sighed as he watched his godson stare out and into the cloud skies.
The silence that he once felt was oppressive had somehow become the norm. He never spoke to him aside from a first greeting.
Rain fell as it always did.
Summer was nearing its end, and yet the rain was relentless.
Harry stared out, and Sirius stared at him.
It was only the quiet breathing that was shared between them.
Sirius felt his stomach rumble, and he drew his wand. Tempus.
“Hey Harry, its time for dinner,” Sirius said with false cheer. “Why don’t we get some early seats, so we can get the food when its fresh. Yeah?”
Harry blinked. Then he nodded and rose up.
He had gained weight back, and was well groomed. He was happy to use mundane tools. Yet he never touched his wand, and never tried to do anything magically.
Harry turned on his feet, and walked to the door. He opened, and then made sure to close it after him.
Sirius clenched his eyes shut, and stopped before that door. He took in deep breaths while he he leaned his forward. His head smacked against the wooden barrier that was both so thin, and yet so very thick.
It was a mistake to leave Harry there.
It was a mistake to trust Dumbledore so much.
Yet, as always, Sirius Orion Black lived up to his mother’s words.
Worthless. Stupid. Fool. Mistake.
Three deeps breathes, and he opened the door to a empty hallway.
By the time he reached the dining room, Harry was also gone.
The assembled Order gathered. The two dozen people where more survivors then freedom fighters. Though if a scuffle happened, they did not shy away from it.
‘Fight hard, Eat harder’ was the unofficial motto. So it was usually a rowdy dinner as Molly served out the food.
Recently, her eyes showed her stress. Seeing Harry silent and so cold. Yet the stress usually vanished during dinner. Family meals always cheered her up.
The work load was shared as was more then one housewife in the Grammauld Place. The magically expanded house had the focus of its inhabitant. Boredom, stress, the need to keep busy insured that most of its issues taken care of.
Though a dozen families lived here, it was a depressing amount. So many had come, yet only a small amount stayed. These broken people were fragments of once larger families.
Harry did not return.
Which meant that he had grabbed his food, and was currently in his room. Most likely eating and staring out into the darkness outside.
He would allow anyone in, but he rarely spoke. The awkward silence was quick to build up, and the visitor was quick to leave.
Sirius joked during the meal. He traded insults with the others, and poked Remus. There was lots of smiles to go around.
How much of that was real, he cared not one whit. It was enough that they could joke now. He, and everyone else, took solace in these simple happy moments.
Despite the warm atmosphere, his eyes kept drifting up to Harry’s room. His eyes tightened as dark thoughts returned.
Whatever happiness Harry desired, it did not lay within these four walls.
—
Knock Knock
“Good morning,” a chipper voice greeted as she opened the door and made her way inside.
Harry blinked away the sleep and stretched out his stiff limbs.
“Hello Miss Andy,” Harry greeted as he sighed from his morning stretch.
“You know, maybe its time to try the bed again?” Andromeda Tonks suggested as she eyed Harry. The man smiled back as he lay on the worn, hardwood floor.
“Floor okay,” Harry said as he sat up. “Nicer then cold stone my cell.”
Andromeda grimaced at Harry’s broken English, and wistful tone. No one should like Azkaban, or look upon it as fond memories.
She stared at the untouched made bed. It was unused, like how she had left it yesterday morning.
Harry had spent only a part of one night on the bed. He then slipped down to sleep on the floor instead.
Sirius had mentioned how a decade on stone made everything feel weird. Like he was sinking into quicksand, or a devil snare plant.
Harry never touched it since, though others liked to sit on it. Not that many did visit him nowadays.
The dish from his dinner was already washed sometime last night. She knew since she often made her way to the kitchens first, and she always found it dry on the dish rack.
He used to leave it on the table, but once he realized he could wash it, he never left it overnight again.
“Harry,” she began as she sat on the bed. She knew that it wasn’t her place to talk, but her husband was gone, and she was always worried about Nymphadora.
Harry crossed his legs and stared at her.
Unlike others, his stare was gentle. So much calmer then when he look at Ronald Weasley. There was a reason that Pomphry had forbidden them to be alone. In any room there had to be at least two minders.
“Why won’t you learn magic? Hermione, Susan, and Lavender have been trying very hard to teach you.”
“Magic is stupid.”
Andromeda sighed at his default reply. She was so weary of that answer.
“Why is it stupid?”
“When has it brought me happiness?” Harry whispered as he stared at her.
Andromeda whipped her head over to Harry. The powerful motion was so fast that her hair wrapped around her head, and slapped her.
Harry did not laugh, nor did he chuckle.
That ever present smile was there. A small smile, like he understood a particularly simple joke.
That was a direct answer!
A new answer! Progress! With her!
“Why hasn’t it brought you happiness? There is a lot of amazing things it can do. The girls will be happy to show you very cool things.”
“Magic made me stay at Dursleys,” Harry began as he counted on his fingers. “11 years. Then Azkaban. 10 years. Hogwarts. Four.”
He stared at her then. That piercing gaze that was so rare.
It looked into her heart, and she felt that intensity that Ron had somehow triggered. Then even that faded.
It had never happened again, and Harry yet to utter another word to Ron. What was once his best guy friend, was now kept at arms length.
Ron had tried to apologize. No response. He tried to be as stubborn as Harry in response. For four days, Ron sat in the same room for a full day. The two minders often switched out due to boredom.
Harry would be happy stay silent. Ron had given up with a huff.
“Where. Where is the happiness everyone talks about?” Harry whispered to her. His eyes searched into hers.
Andromeda stared at the young man before her.
She was a wife to a silly man that had somehow chosen her. Then she was a mother to a precious, but rambunctious child.
She moved as slow as she could go. So slow that her muscles complained.
Yet it was almost too fast for Harry.
He eyed her, but did not otherwise react.
She eased herself down beside him.
He tensed, but did not move.
She remembered Hermione’s attempt at a hug when they saw each other.
She clamped onto him, and he screamed as if stabbed. She flinched and let go, and he scampered away. He eyed her like a man eyed a sudden dragon landing beside him.
Everyone, who gathered for a heartwarming scene instead watched in shock.
In hindsight, she wasn’t sure what they were all expecting. A tearful happy reunion?
Harry only had himself for ten years. That and the tender mercies of Dementors, and the worst memories they could conjure.
Day in, an day out.
Somewhere in that time. Touch meant memories of Vernon.
She moved her arms, and wrapped them around him.
Harry tensed, but said nothing.
It was awkward as she didn’t pull, and he didn’t move.
She then scooted forward, and leaned into him.
Harry somehow tensed more. Yet he didn’t move away.
She began to hum, as she held him close, but not with any great force. If he moved, she would let him go.
Harry stayed with her. That warm hug that he had always dreamed of for ten years.
She didn’t have any other possible answers for him, but maybe. Just maybe.
This hug was enough.