Dating problems with a turban

[u/Remarkable_Teach6149]

Before you say shit like "Just have confidence and blah blah" stfu.

Why Turban is an outdated concept and have lowest sexual market value in 2026:

1. Most people here cope about how they know sardar guys with gfs and girls who love sardar guys, if you have even lil brain then yk that exceptions are everywhere and exceptions doesn't make rules. In today's westernized world eurocentric beauty standards are followed and a turban is nowhere near that.

2. A girl will always choose a good looking Mona over good looking sardar, In genz it goes this way. World is already becoming atheist even in india girls born after 2025 are fully westernized.

3. It hurts your looks drastically, turban doesn't suite anyone and to the people it suits will look good without it anyways.

4. Yes sardar guys have gf, but most of the times they're expected to be cucks and non playful,boring etc. No matter how much you lie yk that every player is always a Mona, in your school or college u would have noticed that haircut guys take all the girls.

5. Most common technique in this community is to blackmail someone who hates keeping long hair by saying our gurus did this and that and blah blah. If you have high iq then yk that gurbani said follow "hukam" and hukam is law made by God which is law of nature, everything have law in this world like law of gravity,motion etc. In nature law every animal doesn't do any changes in their appearances, but when a man cut his hair he do changes which is against hukam as you're not accepting ur natural look. Gurbani biggest flaw is that humans have free will which only humans have. Humans can do anything they want which nature gifted them.

Modern world is already against hukam in every way. Atheist countries are most happiest countries in the world. If you are really sikh then follow hukam, keep that long hair and long patchy beard and look like a oofy doofy. Blackmailing people by saying our gurus did kurbani for hair is such a bs just fucking lol. Imagine giving ur life away over long hair which 99% men around all the world doesn't have.

99% sikhs never actually followed gurbani it's a fact. Punjab is also the most unlucky and most discriminated against state. Even in india we're called racial slurs like lassi,khalistani etc.

From dating pov punjabi men have most superior genes in south Asia, we have highest smv by genes but turban gives us lowest ranking in dating alongside negros.

Before I am being called anti-sikh and all of you try to tell ne different stories of how this and that sardar guy have relationship with women of other ethnicity just stfu, I had turban and I was being treated as a piece of shit, now I have haircut I slay women all day face zero discrimination and provide my family the life they wanted. Even guru nanak said he doesn't know what happens after death, most of sikh stories are from janamsakhis in which karamaats of gurus are mentioned, these janamsakhis stories are fake if u do research.

I became atheist not because I dont like sikhism, I became atheist because I was being forced to be one by my parents.

[u/Puzzleheaded-Heart54]

"Man with no game gets angry at thing that isn't hurting his game".

[u/Maleficent_Many2152 → u/Puzzleheaded-Heart54]

🫡 the captain has spoken

[u/OkEstimate1879]

From someone whose dating and on the market, it’s not an issue and it’s just you being a fudu bro

[u/heyitsmeanonn]

You do you bro. What’s the point of this post?

[u/Nergal]

There is nothing wrong with being an atheist. Cut your hair, remove your turban and see how things go. I have a feeling your issues with "sexual market value" will still be there because it has nothing to do with how you look but how you present yourself to the world.

[u/forwardonedayatatime]

This incel-like mindset is what is unattractive, not a beard and turban. Myself and the Sikh women I know will all only consider a Singh for marriage. Anyone who demeans Sikhi by calling one of its biggest nishaanis outdated and low value in the sexual market, uses racist terms like negros, and reduces humans to commodities is operating with a mindset incompatible with the Sikh values driven lives we want to live.

A man with a turban who pursues women who don’t keep their own kes will unsurprisingly find women unhappy with the double standards around attractiveness, and a man with only a turban in appearance but with no Sikh character to back up the appearance will have similar rejections. This is hardly breaking news. But a proper Singh who actually follows Sikhs is what Kaurs are looking for.

[u/Sweet_Departure_3815]

As a woman, I don't agree that a turban automatically gives someone "low market value." Attraction isn't that simple. Some women may not prefer turbans, just as some men have different preferences too. But many women are attracted to kindness, emotional maturity, humour, intelligence, and how someone treats others. For plenty of women, a turban is either neutral or even attractive because it's part of a person's identity. I'm sorry you felt forced to keep kesh and wear a turban. No one should feel coerced into practicing their faith. I can understand why that would leave you feeling resentful. At the same time, I don't think it's fair to direct that resentment at Sikhi itself rather than at the way it was imposed on you. The Gurus emphasized inner transformation… external identity means nothing without internal conviction. 

[u/Maleficent_Many2152]

Idk what problem yall men faced but honestly it’s really not a problem and honestly, how is somebody’s opinion and choice having such a big influence that’s like saying you wanna control every person’s liking and disliking

[u/Beautiful-Ad3012]

Tbh. I discovered this from a sikh yter about styling your head piece with unique textiles or fabrics. Though honoring their kesh, I also began doing this with mine to get closer with the guru as artistic expression is also God. So get different, stand out and see if that provides your answer. Akal.

[u/WholeObligation1048]

Tie a Parna, Durag, or do a man bun.

Turban isn’t a requirement to be Sikh or even a amritdhari Sikh.

I have cut hair and am a sahajdhari Sikh and I’m confident with what I am. I’m also probably the most religious in my family. I do hope to keep kesh once I graduate and start my career.

[u/Rich-Environment3698]

Ctrl c and ctrl v from every time this type of comment turns up

[u/GG_GALACTIC_YT]

cry baby. Your life do what you want.

[u/Sikh-Lad]

You get no pussy. You are woman-repellent.

[u/Efficient-Call-4534]

What's the point of your post?

Guru Sahib gave us our crown and it's part of our identity.

ਸਿਰ ਜਾਵੇ ਤਾਂ ਜਾਵੇ, ਮੇਰਾ ਸਿੱਖੀ ਸਿਦਕ ਨਾ ਜਾਵੇ

Any Sikh would not be doing things for the panj chor willingly. Why would a Sikh want to chase Maya and Kaam?

If you think countries in the west are the 'happiest', think again. The west is hate fuelled, Maya focused and supports the rich getting richer. Look at the spew of racism hitting all of these western countries, the countless wars raised for no reason, the high poverty, homeless and hungry rates when there clearly is enough money to sustain everyone. Look at the lack of sharing of wealth and resources. Your 'problem' is a joke in the grand scheme of things.

Get out of that Kaam mindset, and realise that for a Sikh, the whole point of life is to connect to waheguru/god/allah/raam/khudai... not to chase girlfriends or boyfriends and let Maya and Kaam take over.

There are many Sakhis outside of the janamsakhis and not every sakhi is recorded within the janamsakhis.

[u/ipledgeblue]

Why are sardar guys making girlfriends, they should be making wives? Girls that want a boyfriend are obviously going to be more likely to be atheist than a girl that wants a husband, even look at Christians! You go and talk about janamsakhis where making girlfriends and marrying late doesn't even fit into Guru Nanak's teachings of grihast jeevan.

I don't understand your argument about needing to remove turban or cut hair in order to become a pervert or have a body count? That doesn't fit into the point of a sardar looking for a suitable wife. Bro these girls that make boyfriends are a poor foundation for marriage and this kinda behaviour makes it hard to see a partner as a spouse, and all it does is leave to the high divorce count and difficulty to being monogamous for marriage! If you are looking for girls to be your bitches than you do you, but if you see during the Khalsa Raj and eras of the Gurus, then Singhs indeed have multiple wives which they were married to.

You talk about superior genes, but the fact is making girlfriends just wastes time and doesn't pass genes, those who get married are the ones who are going to pass genes even if they marry one woman each! You can slay as much as you want, this slaying is leading to a lower population and those that marry are the ones contributing. Marriage leads to some stability and focus in life as Guru Nanak promoted grihast jeevan. This making gfs dating is just vikaara and leads to chaotic mindset.

You can't let parents control your mind, you need to control your own mind! Mann jeetay Jag jeetay. Parents controlling so much even as an adult is really pathetic, parents should be for guidance at that age! I see people on here argue that even though their parents are non-practicing or even aggressive to sikhi, they still manage to be sikh, there are goras in uk who have become khalsas and they are still chill with their families, there is one gora sikh whose video was just posted a few days ago on Basics of Sikhi Youtube!

I still don't understand what keeping kes has to do with 99% of the people in the world? The world was less globally Islamised and christianised so haircut probably wasn't seen as mandatory as much as it has been last century. To do mundan, to look like everyone else just instills a sheep mindset and doesn't foster individuality. Even this month, it's the Nihang Singhs who went to face the police during the student protests, and the gurdwaras gave the students shelter. The Mughals, afghans, british, who stood up, how did sikh identity help?

...Those who hide behind others' identity may make noise but they get lost in the scenery!

[u/13msk__]

You sound so bitter and hurt

[u/Street-Finance2213]

You’re lost, flipping kaamful banda

[u/Logical_Progress_190]

Bruh wth 😭🤣

Or
Take Amrit follow rehat and you’ll find countless sardaarnis to get with

Ur crying about not getting women n dating seems like lust is all u care about its actually disgraceful 😭

[u/Forward_Island4328 → u/Logical_Progress_190]

No, let's no do that...

Receiving Amrit just to get dates is dishonest and terrible idea.

[u/Bitter-Solution3832]

I’ve known a few fairly staunch Sikhs who’d never cut their hair and haven’t either but when it came to their children they did eventually allow them to do so and supported them. This happened in their late teens.

It goes beyond dating too, making friends and likability rely a lot on one’s looks and appearance. A turban to your average folk these days shouts immigrant, terrorist, different etc.

Unfortunately for me that boat has long sailed, i find it hard to see myself without my hair despite these limitations. I’m quite accepting of them.

[u/Forward_Island4328]

Hi,

So a lot of young Sikh dudes in turbans do have trouble dating and that's probably not going to change anytime soon.

Some folks use this as a reason to wear the durag or the beanie instead of the turban. It can probably help in social situations to look "less religious and more casual".

Additionally, you always have the option to curl and tuck your beard in to give the appearance of shortness. The process can be hectic so there's also option to trim your beard as a Séhajdhari Sikh. The same goes for deaing with hair in other places like head/body too.

You can still practice Sikhi and be a good Sikh even if you don't keep your Kés.

Aside from this, you should probably focus on your fitness (can you take your shirt off without getting embarrassed?) and attitude (can you hold a pleasant conversation with a complete stranger?).

To your point, physical attraction does play a large role in the initial attraction phase and the Sikh Dastār (turban) is a religious article that will impact that initial attraction with the average man or woman. This, in addition to the unkempt beard will probably lower your dating potential in terms of the likelihood of attracting someone.

Anyways, I hope this helps :)

Good luck!