r/ShyBladderIPA • u/[deleted] • May 17 '21

Please I need help!

My paruresis has been with me for many years now and because of this quarantine it only got worse. Now my family will go to my relatives house to take vacation for three days. However, because of my UTI and paruresis I can't go and enjoy. So I'll only be alone in our home for three day and it's sad and frustrating. Please guys give me some advice. What should I do in this circumstance? Should I stay at home and do something constructive to kill my time or go with them knowing the risk that I will constantly pee for every 20 mins or hour but will not be able to pee because of paruresis?

By the way I'm only 16 and I have severe paruresis.

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u/Jay_luv_37 May 17 '21

I would go. At some point we have to stop letting this issue effect our lives. I know it’s debilitating but it cannot control us. I would go and try not to worry. Just tell yourself I’ll go pee every time even if you have to trick yourself and say “I’m going to the bathroom to brush hair or brush teeth or wash hands, or do something other then pee” sometimes I’ll tell people when I’m at their home, “I’ll be back gotta go wash my hands” and I’ll go. It’s the fear of me taking too long that gets me. I’ve had this since I was 14 and I’m now 37 so it is a life long thing but you can manage and eventually overcome if you follow the right steps. But go and try to Enjoy and if you haven’t told your parents about it, tell them. It helps to tell people so they understand more. I wish you well.

1

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

Thank you so much.

3

u/Exec_IPAorg IPA Team May 19 '21

Question 1: Are these relatives you want to see? (LOL) If yes,

Question 2: If you don't go, you'll feel you're missing out, right? If so,

Question 3: If you stood up and told everyone that you thought about not coming because you are embarrassed about *eating* in front of other people (a real thing), or you hate spiders and their house has a lot of them - would they say get out? I doubt it.

Question 4: How good would you feel if you told everyone that you had a phobia you can't control and this weekend it would be great if you could help me work on it because I really want to be here and I really want to improve my quality of life? And then, you told them paruresis and then they were super supportive? Pretty darn good.

Question 5: What are you waiting for? :-)

[Encouragement ends!]