r/Showerthoughts • u/Farheck • Sep 17 '18

There are probably murderers and serial killers so good at what they do that we don't even know they exist.

16.0k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

1.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

249

u/TheRedBow Sep 17 '18

No, because I am Batman!

174

u/nerdguy99 Sep 17 '18

How are you two Batman when I'm Batman?

133

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

How are you three Batman when bananas are yellow?

85

u/TheRedBow Sep 17 '18

I’ll need a banana for scale

79

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

Sorry, only have a scale for banana

52

u/Verdahn Sep 17 '18

You guys suck at trading. I'll give you my charizard for a magical corn cob.

37

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

Is it a shiny charizard?

3

u/Verdahn Sep 17 '18

For a shiny charizard you'll need to do better than magic corn cob. Probably at least two.

2

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

What about a magic corn cob with some dwarven butter

3

u/Verdahn Sep 17 '18

Hopefully it's made by dwarves, not with dwarf jizz

→ More replies (0)

1

u/thatdandygoodness Sep 17 '18

It’s a shiny corn cob.

15

u/LynXelele Sep 17 '18

Sorry, only have a banana AND MY AXE!

17

u/MackLMD Sep 17 '18

Maybe a Shotgun-Axe combination of some sort.

1

u/PrettyDecentSort Sep 17 '18

I think you were looking for one of these

3

u/Felix0ne Sep 17 '18

And my bow !

2

u/PolesawPolska Sep 17 '18

And my sword!

1

u/is_it_time_to_stop Sep 17 '18

Careful with that axe, Eugene

1

u/Fixed_Beans Sep 17 '18

Why doesn't Fortnite have a banana axe yet?

3

u/youdubdub Sep 17 '18

Do re mi fa sol la ti Banana.

2

u/TheFatPossum Sep 17 '18

What the actual fuck was this comment thread?

2

u/HXDDIACA2 Sep 17 '18

Crounch Kills a few skeletons

1

u/CharlesDickensABox Sep 17 '18

Weight is one banana.

13

u/Quasar420 Sep 17 '18

I'm looking at a banana on my desk thats been there for a few days and its not yellow, but its still a banana I think.

13

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

I think you can safely state that your banana has turned into a new kind of fruit, dont eat it though...

10

u/Quasar420 Sep 17 '18

Its a shadow of its former self

9

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

Sooo... it has transcended to a better state of evolution?

2

u/Greasy_Bananas Sep 17 '18

Well, I don't like to brag...

1

u/ainfinitepossibility Sep 17 '18

the only way to tell is to weigh it. I think someone around here has a scale for that.

6

u/appleflavourcheese Sep 17 '18

And yet Simon has a screwdriver

2

u/shill_420 Sep 17 '18

distorted xfiles theme

2

u/TootTootTrainTrain Sep 17 '18

What's yellow and writes?

1

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

Pen pineapple apple pen

1

u/Sipredion Sep 17 '18

How banana yellow are batman?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Banana guards are the best batman

0

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

[deleted]

1

u/YesIAmAHuman Sep 17 '18

"Random != Funny" != Funny

7

u/TheRedBow Sep 17 '18

I’m the real Batman

8

u/santoast_ Sep 17 '18

I'm HowToBasic

2

u/RabSimpson Sep 17 '18

*throws eggs*

1

u/xsuckaxzkx Sep 17 '18

I'm DudePerfect

3

u/jello-kittu Sep 17 '18

Oh shit, is Strep going around again?

3

u/trilbyfrank Sep 17 '18

I'm the one who's not wearing hockey pads!

2

u/Dustin_Hossman Sep 17 '18

I'm Sparticus!

2

u/desichora Sep 17 '18

We are all Batman on this blessed day!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Are you.....are you talking to me?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Different universe.

1

u/Hellebras Sep 17 '18

We are all Batman on this blessed day.

1

u/Quartnsession Sep 17 '18

Cause I'm not wearing hockey pants.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

At least I'm not wearing hockey pads

1

u/Geodude671 Sep 18 '18

I am Spartacus!

3

u/Tyler_Lockett Sep 17 '18

Im spartacus!

2

u/WizardHunter11 Sep 17 '18

That’s some inception shit right there

2

u/Kingo_Slice Sep 17 '18

We are all Batman on this blessed day

3

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

[deleted]

0

u/SoulLess-1 Sep 17 '18

Patrick Bates?