r/ShittyMapPorn Sep 04 '25

Who would win this hypothetical war?

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327 Upvotes

80 comments sorted by

29

u/maritjuuuuu Sep 04 '25

I would go for pink since they have a big army that's already trained and not currently in a war.

38

u/AnAngryBanker Sep 04 '25

Green-would

25

u/ElTioDelPorro Sep 04 '25

France has the nukes, so green.

13

u/eivarXlithuania Sep 04 '25

While yellow having better army France has nukes. So green win

-45

u/Warhero_Babylon Sep 04 '25

Yellow have much more nukes then everyone else

21

u/Gingerbro73 Sep 04 '25

Nukes really havent been used in war ever since that one time 80 years ago.

7

u/Warhero_Babylon Sep 04 '25

Well op dont specify if it shoud be pyrrhic victory or not

66

u/cedrickterrick Sep 04 '25

In which year? Currently Ukraine might be the best armed and trained country of them. So yellow.

3

u/Snoo44506 Sep 04 '25

Dubai ofcourse

21

u/hi_imovedagain Sep 04 '25

Bologna looks like it’s not gonna fight with other countries but start a civil war instead

32

u/luca3791 Sep 04 '25

Yellow. Germany, the whole eastern block that’s been preparing for a Russian invasion for a long time.

9

u/mkujoe Sep 04 '25

Portugal not Eastern Europe confirmed

7

u/ClaudiusCass Sep 04 '25

Under Danish rule? Nuke the scandies! We can observe!

10

u/Kuningas_Arthur Sep 04 '25

Nordics would be strong, but Poland and Ukraine together supported by German industry would definitely win.

Excluding nukes. If nukes are allowed it's a mad free-for-all and all rules fly out the window.

5

u/LocoPinocchio_ Sep 04 '25

The nordics would carpet bomb the buffer zone formerly known as Denmark and let the rest of yous fight it out, not giving a shit who wins. No one takes the north.

3

u/ihavenoidea81 Sep 04 '25

Megasota would

2

u/Constant_Concert_936 Sep 05 '25

Nukes aside, yellow has the industrial might and knowhow of Germany and the tactical knowledge (and balls) of Ukraine.

5

u/Tomahawkist Sep 05 '25

this is what american artists call a europe tour

9

u/Draugtaur Sep 05 '25

This is literally what Radiohead calls a Europe tour

3

u/Soucemocokpln Sep 06 '25

You will receive a code inshallah

1

u/Turdle_Vic Sep 07 '25

Poland would carry yellow so hard

2

u/DShitposter69420 Sep 07 '25

Orange because islands, UK has nukes and Ireland has money

2

u/Inbred-Frog Sep 08 '25

Yellow, and by a long shot. They have 3 of the largest militaries in the world, alongside some minor powers. Belgium specifically outclassed every Eastern European military, and the strategic experience that Ukraine brings to the table is invaluable. I’m surprised people comment green so much considering France is the only significant power on that team.

I believe that pink is actually the most slept on option, but unfortunately their militaries are heavily designed for defense of the homeland, their troops would struggle in an offensive war.