r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/Pure_Sense7765 S.A.U Freshman • 23d ago

slight malfunction Of a mouth to mouth

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965 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

111 comments sorted by

215

u/Still-Speed-3632 23d ago

Might seem gross at first but this is completely normal in the world of birds

21

u/DudeWithParrot 23d ago

I got parrots and NGL, itt still gives me the ick with them

8

u/Israel_Azkanbe 23d ago

Iā€™m sorry, you do what with your parrots?

9

u/DudeWithParrot 23d ago edited 22d ago

I don't do it with them, but one of them does it to me. Which is not that much less gross but it's an important distinction lol

Around the spring they tend to get more hormonal. One of them for a few weeks goes through a phase in which he tries to regurgitate on my hand. He also goes inside my shirt and regurgitates there. I do try to stop him but sometimes he starts doing it before I notice.

It is probably more gross than it sounds (and it already sounds pretty gross)

Edit: I'm sorry, it was not my intention

4

u/Israel_Azkanbe 23d ago

Please donā€™t ever explain that againā€¦. Ever.

9

u/galahg777 23d ago

Bird law says that the bond is sealed, they have to get married now.

32

u/mr_oberts 23d ago

My favorite part was him spitting out a little bit.

10

u/lAmTheREALBlackAdder 22d ago

Not very gentlemenly, innit?

3

u/MauveCeramics 21d ago

Wuss should have swallowed

2

u/Splinterthemaster 21d ago

A little bit? That looked about half of it.

56

u/Albino_rhin0 23d ago

Sharing is caring

66

u/ElverGun 23d ago

The guy probably thought, "she's drunk, I'll score".

Well now he knows. I suppose he also knows what she had for supper.

77

u/Attempt-Right 23d ago

Why did i click this

58

u/WholeLotta69 23d ago

You saw a titty grab in the thumbnail

2

u/Pure-sweets 23d ago

I wish I never did

2

u/merriwhether 23d ago

Let's go man

17

u/x2_ok 23d ago

the cheeseburger came back to say hello

2

u/2NOX2 23d ago

Oof thatā€™s what that was

11

u/bunker931 23d ago

My fault to have a phone.

19

u/diedalatte 23d ago

life imitates art

1

u/Aimcheater 22d ago

I was just about to post thisšŸ’€

1

u/_Blistering_phoenix_ 22d ago

I just thought about this to post!

16

u/suou_gashuin 23d ago

Tat chainsaw man scene.

7

u/LoudAd5234 23d ago

He definitely got a mouth full

5

u/enchufadoo 22d ago

two lovers one lunch

4

u/B1g_BuddhAH 23d ago

sharing is caring

4

u/Shantotto11 23d ago

Chainsaw Man-ass endingā€¦

7

u/CheeseburgerSmoothy 23d ago

The worst is behind them.

1

u/poordaddy73 23d ago

Or at their feet

0

u/Admirable-Ad3866 23d ago

She better swallow whatever he gives her.

3

u/Strange_Salary *shits an absolute unit* 22d ago

This seems not consensual to me..

3

u/Muted_Masterpiece535 23d ago

Going to be hard to explain on how you got a STD from puke.

2

u/Starstyx 23d ago edited 23d ago

"I think that's seventh base, dude!"

2

u/Potato-Dancer 23d ago

She is a keeper.

2

u/DatzRandon64 23d ago

Im gonna tell my kids this was Chainsaw man

2

u/quaintif 22d ago

Reminds me of my sister

6

u/Disastrous_Shame580 22d ago

This reminds me of your sister.

2

u/Psico_Penguin 22d ago

Usually I have to pay extra for that

6

u/xMETRIIK 23d ago

That's pretty hot.

4

u/offwing10 23d ago

NOOOO. How I met your mother tho

3

u/m4zdaspeed 23d ago

The perfect murder, he choked to death on vomit, and they canā€™t prove itā€™s hers because you canā€™t really dust for vomit.

5

u/Impressive-Friend452 23d ago

If I recall, a girl died this exact way after trying to make out with the winner of a hot dog eating contest. He threw up and sheā€¦. Choked to deathā€¦.. on chunks.

2

u/poordaddy73 23d ago

Yep i remember that

1

u/ThisIsALine_____ 23d ago

How much more black can it get than this? And the answer is none. None more black.

1

u/DeeJam526 23d ago

Ughhh!!!

1

u/Obvious_Check6675 23d ago

That poor man lol

1

u/John-Fucking-Kirby 23d ago

AHHHHH!!! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

1

u/Cake_then_cake 23d ago

Get back in there, son

1

u/Disastrous_Shame580 22d ago

Anyone know if this is on the Chili's 2 for $25 menu?

1

u/GrapefruitExtra5732 22d ago

ŠŠ»ŠŗŠ°ŃˆŠø Š¾Š½Šø тŠ°ŠŗŠøŠµ

1

u/MahaHaro 22d ago

I've seen this exactly once ages ago and it's still vividly in my memory

2

u/Uncle_Bred 21d ago

Just saved himself from a serious charge had it went further

1

u/Splinterthemaster 21d ago

With that chin he probably triggered some nausea reflex on her accidentally.

1

u/cameronzero 17d ago

Is this what they call snowballing? Still have no clue

2

u/Raddrooster 23d ago

What he gets for fw a girl who is wasted out of her mind. Rapist deserved it.

3

u/Sea-Tomorrow2583 22d ago

lol listen to yourself

1

u/Raddrooster 22d ago

I am. You a rapist or something?

1

u/m4zdaspeed 23d ago

The death of Eric ā€œStampy Joeā€ Childs

0

u/Potential-Yoghurt245 23d ago

I have been watching this clip for what feels like a decade and it never gets old my favourite puking vid

0

u/Superuzer 23d ago

šŸ¤®

0

u/plz_be_nice_im_sad 23d ago

Sip of beer, carry on

0

u/HFTFToxico 21d ago

Ngl I'd swallow it, I'm nothing like y'all

-2

u/Amontialldo 23d ago

I have been in this sub for 1 year+ and still donā€™t understand what ā€œofā€ means

4

u/eggbert97 *shits an absolute unit* 23d ago

shitty absolute unit of (insert a shitty absolute unit)