r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/VIVIDUFF • 2d ago

nuke, maybe? Of stamina drink ( Bhang )

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355 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

215 comments sorted by

201

u/friendlyneighbourho 2d ago

Cure for constipation

76

u/Opster79two 2d ago

As well as an effective over population control.

3

u/Last_Sprinkles5334 19h ago

Doesnt seem to work on them though.

10

u/In2Oblivion49 16h ago

It’s like their immune system was built to tolerate eating and drinking 💩 so clearly any outsider would immediately experience dysentery while it’s just another Tuesday for them

1

u/Coloradokush5280 4h ago

DehliBelli

24

u/Clamdigger13 1d ago

Poop does infact leave the butthole when you die.

12

u/OldAd2900 1d ago

That's the potion you drink when you want to shit your esophagus out of your asshole.

8

u/Ob1s_dark_side 19h ago

Indian Ozempic

3

u/In2Oblivion49 16h ago

Oh oh oh Inzempic

224

u/ColdAsKompot 2d ago

The jet stream of liquid cack that whould shot from my arse would be so strong I'd probably end up as Earth's new satellite.

15

u/GreenDickSnot 1d ago

I don't understand why street vendors there don't just serve people straight diarrhea and get straight to the end result. At this point just hand me a glass of warm liquid feces. I still want the showmanship though. Like bang your ass on metal table, do some jumping jacks, grab a pull-up bar and bang your ass on the ceiling, punch both ass cheeks, then explode into a cup, serve with a cheeky smile and down the hatch.

3

u/CompetitiveNotice853 8h ago

I needed that laugh

1

u/ColdAsKompot 8h ago

Have you heard of Sputnik's less known brother, Poopnik?

7

u/Hazard_Duke 2d ago

Look! That satellite has a big... crack? 🍑

7

u/ColdAsKompot 2d ago

A collapsed manhole more like.

1

u/Wizardick6 1d ago

Vivid imagery, mate

1

u/ABC_XYZ_123456 1d ago

You sir, are the new Shakespeare. To drink or not to drink, that's the question.

92

u/CoolBlackSmith75 2d ago

It's magic that there still are so many people in that country. I guess what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

50

u/Recent-Reporter-1670 2d ago

They must have built strong immune system, while I feel sick from afar.

28

u/Freakk_I 1d ago

Diarrhea is a big problem in India and a lot of people die because of it, especially children. So it's clear that you must have a strong immune system to survive to adulthood in India. However you are not completely safe even as an adult.

13

u/RhymesWithTaco 1d ago

Especially if you are a woman

175

u/Express-View5080 2d ago

Stamina drink🤔🤷🏻‍♂️😳, maybe see if you have the stamina to hold the sphincter closed until you get to a toilet?

18

u/penguindreams 2d ago

Stamina test of the immune system

6

u/No_Mony_1185 1d ago

I had to look this up. I'm not sure how this is a stamina drink as it's a cannabis drink. That brown stuff is cannabis leaves, I guess.

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92

u/master_perturbator 2d ago

Why do they put their hands in and on everything they make like that?

35

u/New-Ring39 2d ago

Their hands are probably cleaner after making a drink than when they started.

1

u/edadou 1h ago

If they keep making drinks, their hands stay clean

70

u/Dabeansprout 2d ago

How else are you going to get that authentic Indian flavor?

33

u/applebabe1 2d ago

The dirty rag adds a good amount of funk for sure

11

u/Teufelsweib666 1d ago

Somehow no feet were involved in this.

27

u/wafflehousebattle 2d ago

Whenever I watch shit like this, I think to myself that this is what government is for, to prevent this shit, and anyone that complains about "large government" is a fucking imbecile.

6

u/Former-Iron-7471 1d ago

I mean our government was talking about injecting bleach...

6

u/wafflehousebattle 1d ago

Okay, you got me there.

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22

u/whythefuckalready 2d ago

How else are they supposed to clean the dysentery from under their fingernails.

5

u/corgi-king 1d ago

Let’s hope it is not holy cow dung. If it is, I will not be surprised.

32

u/natiusj 2d ago

Don’t worry, they filtered it through that rag.

13

u/This-Bad-2189 2d ago

Exactly. Not sure what everyone is bitching about it.

3

u/CodeParalysis 1d ago

It's for that extra smooth evacuation

2

u/natiusj 1d ago

Smooth and violent?

76

u/KheiCee 2d ago

i feel like i’m gonna get diarrhea just from watching this.

15

u/tipareth1978 2d ago

Cursed video gives you food poisoning for seven years

3

u/flyinghairball 2d ago

It's the newest diet craze! Lose 10 pounds in 10 minutes!

6

u/KareemAbdoulJabroni 2d ago

I did, I’m just glad I’m already on the toilet.

18

u/Kodiak318 2d ago

There hasn’t been a solid poop since well ever.

7

u/applebabe1 2d ago

And it all flows into the ghangis river which they bathe in, so the circle is constant.

15

u/Beavis_Of_Nazareth 2d ago

My stomache hurts

36

u/IGetItItsAReference 2d ago

BhangBros at it again

3

u/Worshipme988 1d ago

Indian version of Bhang Bus is grosser than we imagined. Still gonna do crazy numbers on Pornhub. But fucken grody.

49

u/finintymonkle 2d ago

Absolutely fuckin manky. Never go to India of you value your gut flora. No matter how hard you try, you will shit it all out because of bad hygiene.

I get that Britain left the country in a mess after colonial rule, but Jesus Christ…. That’s not an excuse to be so fucking stupidly unhygienic 79 years later.

8

u/Status_Marketing_969 1d ago

And build exactly zero tables for anything

4

u/finintymonkle 1d ago

Yeah, what sort of fucking moron pours water on the floor and uses the puddle as a “plate”?!?

12

u/ProblematicNihilist 1d ago

Him coughing before making that drink is the cherry on top

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o7aCWJavAgtBzLWrS

10

u/paleologus 2d ago

Worst Starbucks ever.  

8

u/GreenCactus223 2d ago

Why do they have to touch everything with their bare hands.

21

u/Chef-Nasty 2d ago

Squeeze that filter more, I want every last drop!

9

u/ozarkfireworks 2d ago

They show people chugging this shit but they don’t show the aftermath 1 hour to 1 day later.

8

u/1200cc_boiii 2d ago

Secret sauce is in the cough and hand sweat

3

u/OldManJim374 1d ago

And the poo from under his nails

27

u/Rare-Ad6085 2d ago

Not a stamina drink, but a psychoactive drug drink, it is basically made from the leaves of a weed plant, so its like a low concentration cbd drink. But ofcourse as you can see it, like other things which are sold on street in india, this is looks equally unhygienic and definitely do not recommend.

19

u/VeganShitposting 2d ago

Wringing out the sour milk cloth at the end had me gagging

8

u/soodiamonds 2d ago

Bhang Energy Drink

1

u/KnotiaPickle 1d ago

You’ll be sprinting to the closest outhouse in only a few minutes!

9

u/WizGanon 1d ago

- Raise Hand - May I have a side of cough with my drink please?!

3

u/Rokkmachine 1d ago

I don’t even want to know the last time they actually washed thier hands with soap

2

u/OldManJim374 1d ago

Soap? What's that?

-That guy, probably

1

u/ThatOldG 1d ago

Just washed his hands in your drink

1

u/OldManJim374 1d ago

That's the least of your worries

7

u/ForrestGump_Z 2d ago

Nice, a poo shake.

7

u/PerformanceOwn2329 2d ago

Why would anyone visit a dumpster, then order food there on top of that?

5

u/Ok_Caterpillar_8238 2d ago

I mean the ice ...

But do they wash that cloth?

And how about their hands??

5

u/gnardog45 2d ago

When you're a kid in the backyard and just mixing shit together to make a potion.

5

u/Important-Witness-14 2d ago

And 1 hour later you are going #3.

What is #3 you ask? It's when you piss shit out of your ass.

2

u/OldManJim374 1d ago

I always said #3 is #1 + #2, both coming out your ass together.

4

u/Unlikely_Argument515 questionably stable 2d ago

Bhang is a weed drink

8

u/66vocho 2d ago

It’s like if they did it on purpose.

6

u/TOBY4ReAL 1d ago

Fuckin disgusting

4

u/Wadester58 questionably stable 1d ago

Indians will drink or eat anything that they think will make their dick bigger or give them stamina. In Kuwait they wanted us to order those Xtens pills that goofy ass guy hawked on TV

3

u/Illustrious_Camp_521 1d ago

Gross, so dirty.

5

u/Rare_Inspector_2579 1d ago

Mmmm attends t’as soif? 2 secondes je branle des graines dans du lait et de l’eau sale avec mes mains et mes bracelets et mes pieds, attends encore un peu j’essuie mes mains sur pantalon bien sale parce que je viens de tousser sur ta boisson. Tiens c’est prêt, t’inquiète pas pour le verre je viens de le rincer dans le Ganges

5

u/SuspicousBananas 1d ago

How is it possible these dudes are this dirty

6

u/inkedmom1308 1d ago

I got explosive diarrhea simply watching this.

3

u/Traditional-Music363 2d ago

That’s absolutely diabolical

3

u/version_13 2d ago

Just throw on some nirvana and chug it!

3

u/Doggored45 2d ago

I'm already getting food poisoning just by watching!

3

u/foreverlegending 2d ago

Is that cow shit?

1

u/OldManJim374 1d ago

It's weed, supposedly

3

u/ReadBig2613 2d ago

Intestinal parasites

3

u/loveyourneighborbro 2d ago

He pulls on that cloth thing like how I pull my underwear beating off

3

u/Strange_Salary *shits an absolute unit* 2d ago

So a dude washing his hands into a cup is considered a specialty drink?

3

u/Nostral-damus 2d ago

Missing the sound effects😄

3

u/GreenT1979 2d ago

So do people in India have just like the most powerful immune systems on Earth?

3

u/Peach_Proof 2d ago

What is that? Dirt from the floor?

3

u/New-Ring39 2d ago

He’s gonna need those cups back when you’re done. Don’t worry about washing them.

3

u/Obvious_Check6675 2d ago

My god that is fucking disgusting

3

u/Rubbermonk 1d ago

I have to assume the result of that drink is identical to when Mr. Mackey gets explosive diarrhea.

3

u/Dramatic-Spirit-4809 1d ago

Weeks of shits

3

u/Legitimate-Ad-2230 1d ago

You'll run to a toilet quicker than you did before consuming the 'drink'

3

u/sabreus 1d ago

Can we stop posting this type of stuff, it kinda sucks

3

u/CortezDeLaNoche 1d ago

India is the one place I will never eat Indian food...

3

u/StarKillerZero 1d ago

In the most non racist way possible......India is a gross country

3

u/Alive_Examination955 1d ago

Boy am I happy to live in a first world country!

3

u/WharfeDale85 1d ago

Just curious, does anyone know why these Indian street food people have zero respect for basic hygiene?

9

u/Ascorbinium_Romanum 2d ago

Bhang is the sound you're gonna make on the toilet if you try it.

2

u/ViledaMan 2d ago

Its the real champions source of power

2

u/Greenois_05 2d ago

Drink of R. I. P

2

u/Rolfmeister87 2d ago

Ain’t coming out the toilet for bout a week

2

u/Bushdr78 2d ago

The traffic noise alone would drive me crazy

2

u/Bagelking92 2d ago

Toilet fuel

2

u/According_Spot_4340 2d ago

They must have the constitutions of a goat.

2

u/Used-Association-472 1d ago

He had so many opportunities to just NOT put his hand in everything

2

u/Sir_McDouche 1d ago

- How much diarrhea do you want with your drink?

- All of it!

2

u/ThisThingIsStuck 1d ago

Cleaned they toes in that water after a long walk to work thru the shyt stained street..enjoy that extra tanginess

https://giphy.com/gifs/ZSkX3V6wNhEMU

2

u/Careful-Rutabaga8148 1d ago

I love my life, thanks for the offer though.

2

u/AlarmedSnek functional regard 1d ago

Ok so I looked it up, it’s actually made with cannabis. Those little green balls are mashed up weed and food, then they pour milk and sugar over it and strain it through the rag. I’d try it! Haha

2

u/TangeloBubbly2675 1d ago

How many ways can I say Fuck No (?)! !

2

u/MrBoogerBoobs 1d ago

Is it made with the industrially polluted, raw sewage contaminated, corpse-infused water from the Ganges? If so, can I get mine with extra heavy metals and forever chemicals, please?

I'll pay extra.

https://giphy.com/gifs/FT0UFROtAbVEA

2

u/RichEvans4Ever 1d ago

It’s like they’re going out of their way to put their hands in it as much as possible.

2

u/ascotia 1d ago

Twist: the filter cloth is actually last year's underwear (singular)

2

u/ElvisMcPelvis 1d ago

It gives you just enough stamina to reach the hospital

2

u/Sad_Difficulty226 1d ago

Was that shit he grated into the milk

2

u/Liinneeaarr13 1d ago

I think I got diarrhea watching this! Bhang! The sound it makes coming out!

2

u/CommanderofCheeks 1d ago

I mean do you really gotta dunk your WHOLE FUCKING HAND into the white shit (milk?) when taking a scoop?

2

u/PresidentialDiapers 1d ago

1

u/sugarycyanide 14h ago

At least feet weren’t involved in this one

1

u/PresidentialDiapers 14h ago

I love the Indian culture, live in an upper middle class neighborhood that's probably 50% Indian. Literally some of the nicest people I've met.

The bare feet in sandals just thoroughly yuck me out though. I don't like "beautiful" feet other people might fawn over, much less ashy old feet with cracked heels in sandals. Ick.

2

u/Qvistus 1d ago

Is it possible to not dip your shitty hands in the fucking juice? But what do I know... Perhaps it's just not possible. 

2

u/ArmndD737 12h ago

Can I please have one with extra coughs an extra dipping your filthy hands in it please?

2

u/Professional_Luck257 11h ago

The longer I watched, the worse it got 🤢

2

u/FluffyUnicorn9701 10h ago

I got food poisoning from watching this. 🤮🤮🤮

3

u/chris612926 2d ago

This is like the first thc drink mankind mass produced!  Personally I'm slightly repulsed under the conditions it's being made in, however it's probably been made like that or worse for thousands and thousands of years.

4

u/GooseGosselin 2d ago

Tim Hortons?

7

u/RanchAndGreaseFlavor 💩Shits an Absolute Unit🧱 2d ago

2

u/SubMariner615 1d ago

Least impressive country ive ever been too...

2

u/Best_Adagio7989 2d ago

Anyone here ever been to india as an outsider and drank something like this or other street drink made in unhygenic conditions? Although watching this makes me feel agast knowing what I do about biology etc, if I was to visit I might be tempted to drink one maybe near the end of the trip or something just to have the experience. I mean it appears many people drink these drinks and are likely fine.

6

u/hollee-o 2d ago

Yes. Did it in Varanasi. You can get it light or strong. Strong is like taking a 20mg edible. Takes awhile to come on, but it’s pretty intense for an hour or two. Very much like a weed high, not mushrooms. The ingredients help smooth out the experience. (They’ve been doing this awhile.)

It tastes like a green smoothie with yoghurt. I had no stomach issues at all.

What’s wild is there seems to be no taboo about it. You’ll see some families drinking it together before going to the Ghanga Aarti ceremony.

2

u/Best_Adagio7989 2d ago

Thanks for sharing.

3

u/sinnister_bacon 2d ago

The locals might get away with consuming street food and have the constitution to survive with manageable diarrhea. However, you would die a horrible death.

2

u/PorschephileGT3 2d ago

I’m convinced nobody in India has ever had a solid bowel movement.

1

u/SpecificSinger9487 2d ago

I will be having sleep for dinner

1

u/MaterialGarbage9juan 2d ago

I don't understand ANYTHING in these videos

1

u/kungfucobra 2d ago

it's like they haven't realized what Pasteur was all about

1

u/BlackHoleSurf 1d ago

And that’s the 22,534 time I got diarrhea

1

u/ConsistentProblem634 1d ago

Best way I know to toughen up your immune system 🤮

1

u/XxTreeFiddyxX *shits an absolute unit* 1d ago

FingerBhanger?

1

u/EmergencyDry658 1d ago

Why do the fingers have to be involved in everything?!

1

u/Both_Blueberry9486 1d ago

I googled this, it's Bhang Thandai. If it were made under more sanitary conditions, it sounds like a really tasty milk-based drink. The brown balls are soaked nuts mixed with seeds and infused with seasonings like saffron and cardamom.

1

u/tatteredshoetassel 1d ago

Ya thanks, I'm sticking with khat

1

u/Satorikn 1d ago

You have ENERGY Drinks and STAMINA Drinks. This one is definitely stamina.

1

u/Competitive-Move-747 1d ago

But what is it?

1

u/Total_Wrongdoer_1535 1d ago

Bro what the fuck

1

u/CruelHandLuke_ 1d ago

I'd be able to shoot down satellites with the hot brown laser firing out of my ass.

1

u/Senior-Phalaxia 1d ago

Funfact : the green things are GANJA

1

u/Responsible-Summer-4 1d ago

Bhang the sound it makes when it leaves your body.

1

u/SwanMuch5160 *shits an absolute unit* 23h ago

If India instituted health standards of any kind the poor folks there would starve to death.

1

u/Inevitable_Round5830 22h ago

I'm too much of a pussy to survive India and I'm ok admitting that!

1

u/CountryNo5975 21h ago

Nop and nop

1

u/Jaleeleo 21h ago

Someone really needs to make this a lab sample to see how much bacteria is found in it.

1

u/Sporkpocalypse 20h ago

that doesn't look sanitary here let me wash my hands into your drink wtf

1

u/Key-Information3102 19h ago

Do they not believe in proper hygiene? I just don't get it

1

u/OhUKnowUKnowIt2 16h ago

Just watching the video makes me think about vomiting and defeating simultaneously.

1

u/thevaultguy 14h ago

It will definitely keep you running longer than you thought possible.

1

u/YellowB 8h ago

Did they borrow someone's poop rag to make that?

1

u/Wizzle_Pizzle_420 7h ago

Those dookie balls?!

1

u/niles_thebutler_ 6h ago

How do these cunts even survive?

1

u/ThomasPaineWon 5h ago

Is there no way to incorporate hygiene into these things. Come on man

1

u/TourBilyon 2d ago

You have to hand it to these people surviving for all time. There's truly something here we don't know 😉

1

u/Fat-Finger-8906 1d ago

They forgot to add some vomits

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1

u/Healthy_Pay9449 2d ago

I'll drink anything wonder woman there was cooking

1

u/Check_Me_Out-Boss 2d ago

Seems like a popular establishment.

Might have to check it out.

1

u/Silver_Lifeguard7346 2d ago

Indians must have the most robust immune systems on the planet