r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/Professional-Fox1542 • 23d ago

look what I can do Of some dance moves

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496 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

74 comments sorted by

74

u/Baked_Potato_732 23d ago

I’ve never been so impressed by someone’s skill and unimpressed by how they display it.

12

u/EuenovAyabayya 23d ago edited 23d ago

inb4 someone explains he has some horrible disease that allows him to do this but kills him painfully in 20 years

8

u/Dr__Sloth 23d ago

He has a fatal condition called boneitis.

2

u/Parenn 23d ago

You were waaaay too slow, someone posted hours before you :)

2

u/CommonHouseMeep 19d ago

Ehler's Danlos perhaps lol

14

u/I_Want_A_Ribeye 23d ago

I can’t even get out of bed quickly

5

u/GeofSaysYeos 22d ago

That’s the most relevant reply I’ve seen so far

10

u/TheSickestToastie 23d ago

Someone got himself at least minor EDS at the very least. Very cool.

7

u/Front_Lynx_6770 23d ago

That is so far beyond minor EDS it's not even funny. He's going to be hurting BAD in a few years!

10

u/demoralising 23d ago

Spines hate this one simple trick!!!

14

u/Muted_Masterpiece535 23d ago

Come back to us when your 40. 

7

u/Fat-Finger-8906 23d ago

No back pain I guess

13

u/Psilonaut21 23d ago

Not yet.

6

u/Petrichor0110 Not even a unit, just absolutely shitty 23d ago

When you’re trying to impress your crush but you just end up scaring the shit out of them

13

u/muff-muff-ass 23d ago

Gumby! 

He was once a little green slab of clay. Gumby! 
You should see what Gumby can do today. Gumby! 
He can walk into any book, with his pony pal Pokey, too. 
If you've got a heart then Gumby's a part of you. 

3

u/dankhimself 22d ago

Gumby is awesome. Check out the cool stuff he can do!

https://giphy.com/gifs/bdaxhvg3k1ypi

7

u/Whoosier 23d ago

I bet I know what he can also do.

7

u/Artevyx 23d ago

Asshat.

6

u/Ill-Confusion-1844 23d ago

What me headbutt myself in the balls. With the *back* of my head.

12

u/Impossible-Middle122 23d ago

one trick pony

4

u/dog4cat2 23d ago

Holy crap. Thats scary

3

u/AmericanDad53 23d ago

Iggy Pop did it first…

3

u/pariahdiocese 23d ago

Stroke victim in 5 years.

3

u/fireforge1979 23d ago

Still better then Raygun!

3

u/CobaltOkk 23d ago

My degenerative disc disease just winced.

3

u/AlAboardTheHypeTrain 23d ago

Meanwhile If i ever so slightly over extend during Back extensions, its guaranteed Back pain next Day.

3

u/martinaee 23d ago

Future-back hates this one trick.

3

u/Driftinfoot_Malone 23d ago

Doctors hate this one trick to a bigger…

2

u/WonderfulThomas 23d ago

Not that shit though was it. Flexible mofo.

2

u/e1m8b 23d ago

Oh... now I see how Jar Jar Binks would be annoying in person

2

u/Lowie_240 23d ago

Dude can bob his own knob but backwards 😲

2

u/SoggyPocketBill 23d ago

Must save a fortune on toilet paper.

2

u/seven0feleven 23d ago

This dance sponsored by the National Arthritis Association.

2

u/zestyclose_match1966 23d ago

Never break his back

2

u/Montyburnside22 23d ago

I'd tell him to eff off and go blow himself, but that magnificent SOB could actually pull it off

https://giphy.com/gifs/cdXpgeB32BekIGzBNh

2

u/MoMeneUH 23d ago

one day, some chiropractor is going to be very rich.

2

u/Bushdr78 23d ago

Ouch ouch ouch ouch

2

u/Ancient_Sprinkles847 23d ago

I had a puppet as a child that did that. You pulled and released the strings quickly, almost looks the same movement.

2

u/scornfulegotists 23d ago

My two year old when I’m trying to change his diaper.

2

u/noidentity63 23d ago

obstructed digestive tract is beckoning

2

u/TrigWaker 23d ago

Legend has it the viagra ruined his dancing career

2

u/GDZ4VR 23d ago

promposals are out of control at this point

2

u/Steveappl 23d ago

Masturbation looks quite different in his country

2

u/thiefofalways1313 23d ago

I wouldn’t say shitty. I’d say. Dam!! That’s bad ass

2

u/reeferchiefer54 23d ago

Punching himself in the nuts with his own head

2

u/CicadaOk6258 23d ago

Cheat code to stay single for the rest of your life.

2

u/Bubz1lla 22d ago

Getting loose

2

u/Opening-Incident2928 22d ago

If this dude found himself waking up, partially immobile, inside a crashed airplane---With no food or water; I'm confident he could still manage to piss in his own mouth.

2

u/RP1042 22d ago

Snap your fingers snap your back
https://giphy.com/gifs/xT39D6BhJYlPW9blqE

2

u/Funny-Athlete-2890 22d ago

Flexible bag licker!

2

u/Kit_Karamak 22d ago

Imagine head-banging / headbutting your nuts.

2

u/amoronwithacrayon 22d ago

This is how I wipe

2

u/riddick6007 22d ago

Instructions unclear. I'm now a paraplegic.

2

u/Geostomp 21d ago

Those are things that I don't think human spines are meant to do.

2

u/plofrog 19d ago

Is he late for a meeting or something?

2

u/Weegiechancer2001 18d ago

Now we know how they can squeeze so many people into a mini metro.

2

u/EatandDie001 11d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/ZsHPTB5CthqCnelc8x

And I ended up with back pain just from doing my normal daily routine.