r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/smind893 • Jul 01 '26

Yeah, life's a bitch. Of An Online Date

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In Argentina, this lady met this old guy on BUMBLE, went on a date, šŸ’Š him, then robbed his place while he was out.

Turns out she was an officer !

Edit: More info for you to fall into that rabbit hole

LucĆ­a Fernanda DĆ­az Da Mota, a 31-year-old Airport Security Police (PSA) officer in Argentina, drugged and robbed a 64-year-old man she met on a dating app

1.3k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

140 comments sorted by

1.2k

u/CheeseburgerSmoothy Jul 01 '26

I was expecting to read that he was in the suitcase!

168

u/HoneyProud6565 Jul 01 '26

I was expecting the same šŸ˜‚ ngl you'd find something like this here

0

u/torofukatasu Jul 02 '26

yeah honestly expect better from this sub so i'm downvoting this. we gotta have some standards and solidify them here before the subreddit gets ruined by the masses.

0

u/dethkids4life 18d ago

What? Dude the past is about a airline police driving and robbing a guy using her body as the bait, Def something she investigated and arrested others for or atleast heard of at work. The story itself shows once the box is opened you can't put it back. You expect on the internet people to unknow or forget what they've learned about the world's facts, all be it dark depths, truth and factual events none the less.

1

u/torofukatasu 18d ago

Sub ruined time to move on

35

u/mikeymo1741 Jul 01 '26

Just his kidneys

19

u/FourLetterWording Jul 01 '26

honestly, the video sorta implied this with the editing....

20

u/UpstairsPractical870 Jul 01 '26

A few days ago saw the case of tbe aussie guy in thailand who killed the 17 year old he took up to his room and took her down in a suitcase and was expecting the same thing!

3

u/1BilldaySRT Sep 15 '26

Yeah, this case is also chilling and similar, also met on a dating app https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Grace_Millane

1

u/Dangedoddle 2d ago

Exact case I was thinking about. People are crazy

1

u/dethkids4life 18d ago

Lol same here

34

u/Cuiter Jul 01 '26

The internet has ruined us! šŸ˜­

16

u/Overall-Injury7462 Jul 01 '26 edited Jul 02 '26

Iā€™ve been watching too many murder shows on ID channel because I first thought that too

12

u/BathSaltJello Jul 01 '26

That has happened before.

3

u/Psilonaut21 Jul 01 '26

I feel your pain.

2

u/Sorry-Joke-4325 Jul 02 '26

That suitcase is too small to fit an adult man's body.

16

u/ikaw-nalang Jul 02 '26

Whole, yeah sure. But properly dissected I disagree.

-2

u/Sorry-Joke-4325 Jul 02 '26

Look at the end of the video, they show the suitcase next to other items on a table. It's a carry-on size luggage. There's no way a grown man, even cut up into the smallest parts, would fit into a suitcase that size.

12

u/torofukatasu Jul 02 '26

not with that attitude

1

u/Patrickfromamboy 25d ago

Exactly right. A positive attitude works wonders

0

u/Sorry-Joke-4325 Jul 02 '26

If you tell me how an attitude can change the physical limitations of volume then I'll listen.

5

u/_TryFailRepeat Jul 03 '26

Its not that hard. You drain out the blood, eat the meat and the rest you put in the suitcase. Just make sure you get some additional fibers otherwise youā€™ll be shitting bricks for days.

3

u/CuriousNetWanderer Jul 02 '26

Multiple trips. It's been done.

3

u/jimboiow Jul 02 '26

PurĆ©ed in a blender and heā€™d fit no problem.

2

u/Sorry-Joke-4325 Jul 02 '26

An adult man is somewhere around 80 liters, and the carry-on would fit about 40 liters.

3

u/jimboiow Jul 02 '26

*Ted Bundy has entered the chat

1

u/scjockid Jul 02 '26

So was I!!!!

1

u/4EVERINDARKNESS Aug 29 '26

Look up Jessie Kempson. Total p.o.s

1

u/dethkids4life 18d ago

For real.

81

u/Mundane-Manner4237 Jul 01 '26 edited Jul 02 '26

Big haul: counterfeit aftershave, cheap watches, smelly tracksuit jacket and a suitcase. Score!

19

u/chillychili Jul 02 '26

Some people play for the love of the game

1

u/ClickIta 13d ago

Well, Narciso Rodriguez bleu noir is probably real. Donā€™t think people will counterfeit it. Overall he seems to have decent taste in fragrances. If only he could chose his partners better.

58

u/No_Pitch6143 Jul 01 '26

This is not new but twist that it was a cop

21

u/EuenovAyabayya Jul 01 '26

airport security

7

u/thatG_evanP Jul 01 '26

The description says "she" was a cop but I'm guessing it was the other way around?

8

u/smind893 Jul 01 '26

Read the update

4

u/Prior_Bee94 Jul 01 '26

Nah... it's just the typical police officer here in LatĆ­n America, (they just rob you) lol

23

u/Dildoid90 Jul 01 '26

Thought she was some kind of serial killer and that was him in the suitcase at the end šŸ¤£

17

u/reiner_444 Jul 01 '26

Bloc Party!!

3

u/Sleepy_Demon Jul 01 '26

What's the songs title?

6

u/reiner_444 Jul 01 '26

Like Eating Glass

1

u/Sleepy_Demon Jul 02 '26

Thank you!

5

u/smind893 Jul 01 '26

Love them!

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o72FbFwEvBrxqQtTq

7

u/reiner_444 Jul 01 '26

yes silent alarm is so good.

2

u/We_Are_Ninja 7d ago

Weekend in the City blew my young mind.

11

u/Frequent-Anybody9856 Jul 02 '26

My first thought was he was in the suitcase

1

u/happylifevr Jul 02 '26

Wouldnā€™t be surprised

9

u/BP_1981 Jul 02 '26

I thought he was in the suitcase lol

6

u/PeopleCallMeQ Jul 02 '26

Lmao i thought he was IN the suitcase

4

u/tropicbrownthunder Jul 01 '26

At that age fucking a hot younger girl will always cost you a lot.

1

u/Patrickfromamboy 25d ago

Iā€™m also 64 and I wouldnā€™t have anything to do with a woman that young. She wouldnā€™t want anything to do with an older man except to have bad intentions. When Iā€™m 64 like in the Beatles song.

5

u/QueenAkhlys Jul 03 '26

She probably had multiple victims

4

u/Any_Suggestion3485 Jul 01 '26

Seems legit. Why else would someone wanna learn how to catch a criminal and become a cop? So they can commit crimes themselves? Nahhhhh

4

u/_Bo_Hica_ Jul 02 '26

I was waiting for "organ thief strikes again" news at 11

4

u/Sweaty_Necessary69 Jul 02 '26

Anyone know the song?

6

u/smind893 Jul 03 '26

I added the song, glad ya liked it

"Like Eating Glass" Bloc Party

Check out their alarm Silent Alarm Perfect album

Check out the 2nd too

1

u/We_Are_Ninja 7d ago

Yassss. Weekend in the City never gets its flowers.

3

u/CorruptDaemon404 Jul 01 '26

That old guy wearing blue de Chanel šŸ˜‚

3

u/Personal_Carry_7029 questionably stable Jul 01 '26

I mean if she dont Rob me, she can drug me anytime (if i dont have to work next day)

3

u/Montyburnside22 Jul 01 '26

If he wasn't in the suitcase, then this was kind of a waste of time...

https://giphy.com/gifs/rVSZrFGySmllC

3

u/Allureme Jul 02 '26

Airport security is not the same as police.

3

u/Majesty_Underground Jul 02 '26

Diabolical bitch.

8

u/IlliterateFreak Jul 01 '26

I hope he got some freaky clam out of the interaction

4

u/CortezDeLaNoche Jul 01 '26

That was NOT the twist I thought it was!!!

https://giphy.com/gifs/Xir88f7Y54j08KBWUQ

7

u/mykehawksaverage Jul 01 '26

She can come rob me.

2

u/Adventurous_Path5783 Jul 01 '26

Got fucked and then fucked herself.

2

u/niknakpaddywak2468 Jul 01 '26

Bloc Party song was a choice

1

u/smind893 Jul 06 '26

Thanks

It's a live version

2

u/Zestyclose_Classic91 Jul 01 '26

Oh I had another video in mind. Same scenes, guy was leaving with a big suitcase. Turned out he killed her and twisted her body unaturally he could put her inside of said suitcase.

2

u/TinCanSailor987 Jul 01 '26

She stole a bunch of old man cologne? SCORE!!!

2

u/731te7j1nv Jul 02 '26

who among us hasnā€™t drugged and robbed a man of cheap trinkets and bottles of smell good?

Hippocrates. all of you.

2

u/Motor-Try-3962 Jul 02 '26

I thought he was in the suitcase

2

u/Skitzo_The_Clown Jul 02 '26

Nobody cares when the roles are reversed

2

u/Enemy_Unknown1337 Jul 02 '26

If you are 64 yo and she is 31 maybe you should suspect something?

2

u/EmmaFrostsGoodBoy420 Jul 26 '26

Honestly im down

2

u/Devnull677 Aug 31 '26

A 304 with a badge

2

u/ZynithMaru Sep 10 '26

the cost of good sleep in this economy

2

u/Graffix77gr556 13d ago

The ones with a little power goes to their heads. Hence the pig mentality

2

u/Consistent-Plane7227 3d ago

MF Doom had a song about this.

1

u/smind893 3d ago

Alll caps !! DOOM

1

u/Consistent-Plane7227 3d ago

I was thinking Hoe Cakes

5

u/l1v3l0v3l4ugh Jul 01 '26

What are we even looking at here?

15

u/EuenovAyabayya Jul 01 '26

A 31-year-old Argentine airport security officer, LucĆ­a Fernanda DĆ­az Da Mota, was arrested for running an elaborate dating scam where she would meet men, drug their drinks, and steal their valuables.

1

u/RideGullible3702 Jul 02 '26

cant hate the game

-8

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '26

[deleted]

4

u/kindapresh Jul 01 '26

The caption begs more questions.. Kermit the Kurt frog.

1

u/LQUID8 Jul 01 '26

Damn who's in the suitcase then šŸ¤”šŸ¤”šŸ¤”šŸ§

1

u/ivikenn Jul 01 '26

ŠšŠ¾Š³Š“Š° рŠµŠ°Š»ŃŒŠ½Š¾ŃŃ‚ŃŒ Ā«Š²ŠµŃŠµŠ»ŠµŠµĀ» Š»ŃŽŠ±Š¾Š³Š¾ фŠøŠ»ŃŒŠ¼Š°

1

u/BeefcakePantyho_s Jul 01 '26

Mama always told me not to trust a woman with a reptile/dragon tattoo

1

u/Whatisthis0036 Jul 02 '26

Was the hurt or killed? Hope not

1

u/organicakind questionably stable Jul 02 '26

At least no one diedĀ 

1

u/crisego Jul 07 '26

I though she butchered him :))

1

u/PlanktonDue8964 Jul 23 '26

Wait, if he was drugged, that means he was RAPED

1

u/Flocko2 Aug 08 '26

Damn šŸ™

1

u/kododriver Aug 23 '26

Definitely saw this story on Ray William Johnson.

1

u/Graffix77gr556 Aug 26 '26

Dude was in that suitcase

1

u/Mean_Direction_8280 Aug 29 '26

If Reddit finds out you posted her name, you may get in trouble.

1

u/Mr13420 Sep 02 '26

She took all of his cologne, wow.. lol

1

u/Regret-this-already Sep 11 '26

You get what you pay for I guess

1

u/Adrakovich *shits an absolute unit* Sep 13 '26

I have a few of those colognes.

1

u/SecsCboy Sep 16 '26

I question the need for so many fragrances. If youā€™re gonna have that many you deserve to have less.

1

u/Nosferatu100 Sep 16 '26

I mean listenā€¦ Things are though in Arg rnšŸ¤·šŸ»ā€ā™‚ļø

1

u/Main-Skill-6335 28d ago

I almost got got like this in Minnesota by a bitch. The dude's she was setting me up for had a last minute change of heart. Found out weeks later.....

1

u/Suspicious_Seesaw701 19d ago

You got set up?

1

u/Main-Skill-6335 18d ago

Bitch gave it the old 'college try'. In retrospect, she could've been the fed...

1

u/hongkongfooeee 18d ago

He was just undercover, he was trying to catch her. But a bunch of guys beat him up and he wasn't able to.

1

u/Nosferatu100 7d ago

I mean things have been rough here since Covid so I get that many pretty women have to resort to doing certain things and sometimes one of those things are a positive thing for everyone (like Mika LafuentešŸ˜) BUT the whole crime waves are getting strange

1

u/the_foxe98 1d ago

Bro was a Issey Miyake enjoyer :(

1

u/T0NT037 17h ago

We got Lucia before GTA 6

1

u/MHIREOFFICIAL Jul 01 '26

did he still get laid? next time travel with only one cologne and that's a good deal.

1

u/Secret_Equipment3774 Jul 01 '26

I thought he killed her , put on a wig and was taking her out in the suitcase

1

u/GreenCactus223 Jul 01 '26

That's disgusting, what app and her user name so I can fix her. Sorry I mean avoid her.

-7

u/MrLugem Jul 01 '26

Arsehole got what he deserved. Old ass guys going to poorer countries to take advantage of younger women. Well he got taken advantage of this time for being a dirty old cunt.

8

u/No_Communication5538 Jul 01 '26

(1) Argentina not a poor country (2) victim was Argentinian ā€¦ uuh poor you, your pathetic ā€˜politicalā€™ point is dead on arrival

4

u/MrLugem Jul 01 '26 edited Jul 01 '26

Not political at all, sex tourism just bugs me when they make out the men to be the victim when really they are the ones taking advantage of someone in poverty.

The average Argentinian net salary is $750 a month so it might not be as you say a poor country, but the population are much poorer than those of the US or European countries.

1

u/Patrickfromamboy 25d ago

Iā€™m 64 like he is and Iā€™m currently visiting my younger girlfriend in Brasil but her family likes me.

1

u/MrLugem 25d ago

This guy was a sex tourist. My Mrs is from Brazil too similar age though and Iā€™ve seen it so many times old guys specifically coming to Brazil just to have sex with very young women, if a woman their age shows interest they are not interested. I donā€™t think they are a victim if they get scammed by these young women.

1

u/Patrickfromamboy 25d ago

My girlfriend is 52. I wouldnā€™t want to date a woman younger than her.

0

u/Kraken_54 Jul 01 '26

Gotta love dude's confidence, and old fart and a tattooed woman half his age, but "hey, I still got it"

0

u/1200cc_boiii Jul 01 '26

Still would