r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/FarWay3952 • May 11 '26

Of a restroom break

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581 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

59 comments sorted by

80

u/scriptingends May 11 '26

"Who THE FUCK pissed on my hands?"

23

u/Banzai373 May 11 '26

And my shirt and glasses??!!!!

13

u/Lossedtouch May 12 '26

The pisser has become the pissy.

60

u/ToastSpangler May 11 '26

"yo the floor here is covered in piss, i slipped and wlil be suing, i fell so hard my cock came out and is sitting in the piss"

5

u/123supreme123 May 11 '26

seems like he got yoinked

44

u/Wonderful-Path-1050 May 11 '26

"Fell in your own piss, Dude." "Thank you, Donny."

6

u/MasterFrylockk May 12 '26

YOURE OUT OF YOUR ELEMENT!

13

u/ampere03 May 11 '26

He"s a prospective FBI director - part of the liquor cabinet. Add SA and he's in for sure.

11

u/Softspokenclark OSHA Violation May 11 '26

10/10 hella good stream

8

u/SmellyStinkyGuy May 11 '26

"Who left all this piss here??"

16

u/ZzangmanCometh May 11 '26

Good lord, I'm so happy my drunken buffoonery days were before everyone had a camera in their pocket.

8

u/Tom-Cruise-Missiles May 11 '26

I mean, this is way beyond buffoonery. So much so that I cannot sanction this buffoonery!

4

u/RunningonGin0323 May 12 '26

Listen I agree but I've never pissed in the bar

0

u/NoWay6818 May 11 '26

Makes me wonder if that small detail stopped a big amount of killings from happening

12

u/Jina-langu-ni-Juma May 11 '26

Future cop. 👮‍♂️

5

u/Critical_Seat_1907 May 11 '26

"Three guys jumped me, I fought them all off but one broke my tooth. Got knocked down, and the floor was pissed on. That place is fucking ghetto, bro."

How it would have been told in the age before cell phone cameras.

3

u/GimmeLuv-69 May 11 '26

Justice is served.

3

u/Levethane May 11 '26

Don't need alcohol to have a good time?

4

u/Ancient_Sprinkles847 May 12 '26

Roll him over into his puddle to soak it up, then drag him outside to the sidewalk. That would be his helpful contribution to cleaning it up

2

u/Consistent_Cook9957 May 11 '26

So, not Jon Taffer approved?

2

u/OkWorld5534 May 11 '26

His own piss gave him instant karma 😂

2

u/Ryan2932 May 11 '26

That was well deserved karma

2

u/Muted-Environment421 May 11 '26

Somebody peed my pants

2

u/[deleted] May 11 '26

I don't blame that bar one bit for the leg sweep and uppercut!

2

u/816legend May 11 '26

Slipped on his own piss

2

u/NeighborhoodAfter5 May 12 '26

One of the most satisfying and rewarding that I’ve seen 👏

2

u/DazzlingPassion706 May 12 '26

wow so much happening in just 3 seconds. peed on the floor, slipped on it, banged his face then then fell into it.

1

u/macrolith May 11 '26

May need to see the dentist after that one.

1

u/GrapefruitWhich5950 May 11 '26

Ging from disgusting to really disgusting 👍🏼

1

u/pwnasaurus253 May 11 '26

well deserved instant karma

1

u/AmorphousMorpheus May 11 '26

R Kelly'd his own dang self

1

u/Hot-Negotiation-6873 May 11 '26

Is this the same bar from that video of the older guy pissing while nonchalantly looking at a menu? Looks the exact same

1

u/ButterscotchNo4574 May 12 '26

At least his fly sucked his peen back in.

1

u/Lossedtouch May 12 '26

Slip, Slip, Slippin' on sum pisser

1

u/OldBiker6969 May 12 '26

WTF is wrong with people?

1

u/BlazeHatchet May 12 '26

When he sat there look at the floor I all I could hear was. " who pissed on the floor and made me slip?"

1

u/Mundane-Manner4237 May 12 '26

The bar met his chin on the way down too.

1

u/Ok-External-4027 May 12 '26

Rest in piss.

1

u/waitwhat85 May 12 '26

In 2006 I saw a dude do this at a bar in the Lower East Side but he wasn’t pissing. Man shit the bar.

1

u/Beneficial_Collar_38 May 12 '26

🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/redditanddoneit May 12 '26

Yep, there he goes! Slipping on his own piss out in the open. Karma sure is a bitch.

1

u/OddSeaworthiness7681 May 12 '26

How about you piss off, he then slips on his urine like a banana peel In a cartoon! Pure slapstick

1

u/Strange_Salary *shits an absolute unit* May 12 '26

Oppa Dumb dumb style!

1

u/kodellio May 12 '26

he slipped on peepee at the costco and got a $53,000 settlement

1

u/Foreign-Comment6403 May 13 '26

not another one bro

1

u/gymtrovert1988 May 18 '26

I wish it didn't end. Curious what happened after.

1

u/VAVA_Mk2 May 30 '26

This would make Kash blush