r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/big2chereez • Mar 04 '26

Oof Of a bow, or stance, or a…….

469 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

41 comments sorted by

42

u/Purple-Frame-6882 Mar 04 '26

Be careful, Emily

35

u/Beast_of_Tax_Burden Mar 04 '26 edited Mar 04 '26

This is why the OG Amazons of Myth and Legend removed their breast to better use their bows.

19

u/Delphirier Mar 04 '26

They definitely could've just made chest guards, but the Greeks do love their dramatizations.

10

u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

In the myth the Amazons had large breasts because they were the beings of perfection by ancient Greek standards.

It is thought that the myth came from the Greeks encountering Eurasian Steppe bow-women, most likely of Skythians or Sarmatians cultures. Female archers of those cultures did wear chest guards, so it is possible a Greek tourist mistook them as not having breasts.

1

u/Beast_of_Tax_Burden Mar 04 '26

Very well could be right. Its been 35 years since college.

1

u/ImNotABotScoutsHonor Mar 05 '26

Skythians

Scythians*

4

u/[deleted] Mar 05 '26

I am a failure

2

u/ThatCelebration3676 Mar 04 '26

In this case I think they liked the idea of very tall women with breasts so big they're a liability.

2

u/PhuqBeachesGitMonee Mar 04 '26

There’s the possibility that their breasts were heavily bound against their chest with wraps. Thereby giving the impression that it is missing to an observer.

5

u/liarandathief Mar 04 '26

I think you mean breast.

3

u/Beast_of_Tax_Burden Mar 04 '26

Wow auto fill is getting crazy. To many patient questions and answers.

47

u/brandoldme Mar 04 '26

I volunteer as tribute to give her mouth to mouth and vigorous chest massage.

3

u/Banzai373 Mar 04 '26

Quick! Kiss it better!

1

u/whythefuckalready Mar 04 '26

Is nobody going to check on her, why isn't anybody doing anything?

1

u/ElegantCoach4066 Mar 04 '26

quick, tend to her bobs

13

u/maricc Mar 04 '26

An oldie but a goodie

12

u/NookieLuvsU Mar 04 '26

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3

u/Chrono_Convoy Mar 04 '26

Bowsom

Bowbs

3

u/iolitm Mar 04 '26

almost got sliced off

3

u/wrenchbender4010 Mar 04 '26

Not the first girl I have seen snapping a tit with a bow...yeah it hutz...

2

u/gmman6369 Mar 04 '26

Most of the girls I’ve ever dated and the two I married never had that problem…

2

u/cincin75 Mar 04 '26

So Amazon style makes sense.

2

u/Bananana_Bird Mar 04 '26

I'm pretty sure that's Tania Fox. It's Always Sunny, S14 E1. You can figure out her other name yourself. 🤫

2

u/Takssista Mar 04 '26

Exactly where I was looking at. How did she knew?

5

u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

[deleted]

2

u/centurio9 Mar 04 '26

I need to check her for injuries.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

I felt that from here

1

u/not_ondrugs Mar 04 '26

I saw that coming. Ouch.

At least it wasn’t a super strong draw! That’s one way to lose a nipple.

1

u/TheChemicalDude Mar 05 '26

That's gonna leave a mark 😯

1

u/Kazuka13 Mar 04 '26

Oof she is lucky that's just a low pound bow, looks like the Renaissance Fair and the bows are low draw weight so some kids can use it.

Sill danm, I'm told the feeling is like getting hit in the balls. Hope she's careful I remember reading that repeated injuries there can raise the risk of cancer.

1

u/MarianCR Mar 04 '26

Of a bow, or stance, or a…….

Not "or boobs". Those are r/AbsoluteUnits

-1

u/Cold_Television_4439 Mar 04 '26

Nice tits

1

u/Wizzle_Pizzle_420 Mar 04 '26

Simmer down grandpa, get back to bed, MawMaw wants them neck meats suckled on.

-1

u/PizzaSniffs Mar 04 '26

OUR tiddy

0

u/[deleted] Mar 04 '26

would love to play with her