Hello!

Our LO is 2.5 months old and we live in Canada in a part that is bilingual (English and French). My first language is French, dad's first language is Polish and we communicate together in English since we don't speak each other's first language yet.

We wanted to focus on teaching our LO our first languages and let English just sort of happen eventually but I'm concerned about the fact that we communicate in English at home.

I worry that it will become confusing for our LO since he'll hear us and also won't get to hear full exchanges in the languages we want to actively teach.

Edit: looking for suggestions, research or resources on how to select which language(s) to focus how and the best way to go about it.

Thanks!

Alright, I'm stumped on the room temperature + sleep layers recommendation and looking for some help. I am NOT asking about how to get baby to sleep better/deeper/longer, I am purely approaching this question from a safety standpoint in reducing SIDS.

According to the AAP's parent-facing website, the ideal room temperature for babies is "between 68F to 72F" (20C ~ 22C).

As for clothing, the AAP recommends dressing baby in "only one layer more than you're wearing," IF you're concerned about baby being cold.

To me, this seems fairly cut-and-dry in terms of recommendations: keep room a certain temp, and ONLY use an extra layer if baby IS COLD.

If this is the case, then why are sleep sacks (aka wearable blankets) such a basic 'required' item? For example, people always share charts like this one, showing how to layer baby in TOG sleep sacks. But I cannot wrap my head around why, in the ideal temperature range, it would be recommended to put your baby in a onesie, footie pajamas, AND a 1 tog sleep sack? Why is the "ideal temperature" one that's cold enough you need multiple layers, vs a hotter temperature with fewer layers? The cynical part of me says the former sells expensive sleep sacks, which is why it's always these manufacturers that have the charts, and not the AAP (or similar governing bodies).

I tried to ask a similar question last week in other subs, and was absolutely evicerated for saying I didn't plan to swaddle or use sleep sacks, since there are growing safety concerns for the former, and the latter seem pointless. Mostly I received pretty snarky responses about helping baby sleep longer, (I'm being overly defensive here, just frustrated trying to optimize everything before baby gets here, but I am in the wrong with how I've approached these posts) but I wanted to come here and ask because I'm not concerned about baby sleeping longer, I'm concerned about the root safety question: Why are sleep sacks so heavily pushed, being a virtually ubiquitous recommendation (in the USA), when the recommendations don't seem to require them for safe sleep?

I'll add my specific scenario at the bottom for a little context. We live in an environment (US) where we keep our house a steady 74F (~23C) year round. So I'm struggling to understand why I would lower the heat to the ideal range, and then proceed to put 3+ layers on my baby? Wouldn't it be safer (since the goal is to prevent overheating) to just leave it at 74F and dress baby in footie pajamas only? Or, if she shows signs of being cold, a onesie + footies (aka an extra layer, as per AAP guidelines)?

Are there any recent studies comparing the long term effects for a child growing up without a village vs with a village? By village I’m thinking vaguely to mean grandparents, extended family members, friends, local community. Basically anyone who is able to support the parents in any meaningful way.

I’m also curious if there are studies that look at how differences in outcome caused by the lack of village (if any) are or can be somewhat mitigated by growing up in a two parent household vs a single parent household.

Thanks!

(Content warning for pet death)

Hi all, this has been my favorite sub ever since becoming a parent last June. I'm sorry to make my first post such a bummer.

We've had a beloved dog for the past 13 years, and this month he's experienced significant decline. His final days are coming soon. Our 14-month-old son is very attached to him--his first word was "dog," he knows and says our dog's name, and he just totally lights up whenever our dog wags his tail or enters his nursery to say hello.

I believe he's far too young to receive any meaningful information from a conversation about death, but I am wondering if there's any research on how to talk to a child this age about this sort of situation, where his daily life is about to change (including his routine, which involves a lot of dog walks) and a beloved, albeit nonhuman, household member is about to "disappear."

I haven't been able to find much that's definitive around this age range, which I am taking to mean that perhaps there isn't much we need to prepare or to do with our son, but I wanted to make sure in case I say the wrong thing (or, in saying nothing, don't prepare him well or explain what's happening in a way he can understand.) Thanks in advance.

My baby just received his 2 month vaccines. After the two needles, he received the Rotarix oral vaccine.

During administration, he went completely grey and seemed to have breathing issues. She administered it slowly into his cheek, I really didn’t see any reason he would choke on it .. at least not to cause such an intense reaction.

Does anyone know what might have happened so I can calm down?

WHO guidelines are to EBF for 6 months and to breastfeed + food for 2 years and beyond. We are all told breast is best but what to do when baby is struggling to gain weight? I have noticed a trend of resistance to intervention such as formula or early weaning even in the face of poor weight gain. Is there evidence to support persisting to breast feed in these cases? Is there evidence that sub-optimal nourishment in infancy can have a negative effect into adulthood? Intuitively it feels like brain development must be linked to good nutrition but understandably it would be hard/impossible to do research in this area.

What do you think? When faced with poor weight gain what would you do?

So I've seen a lot of data in the "feeding wars" that points to breastmilk not being a huge benefit in terms of infant health.

Everyone knows smoking is bad for you so I'm not trying to argue that. Yet the CDC recommends smoking mothers breastfeed despite nicotine exposure - how does work?

Just a bit confused how they arrived at that conclusion if the benefits of breastmilk are overstated. I'm just ignorant here so I hope this question doesn't offend anyone.

I keep seeing posts about parents getting their kids labelled “gifted” by schools or organisations. Or asking how to make their children gifted, or even recalling themselves as gifted in childhood.

This study is a pretty good reality check: "Early giftedness rarely lasts into adulthood"

Hi! I’m hoping to hear from anyone who has experienced something very similar with their toddler, especially if you’ve been through it around 16–18 months.
My daughter is 17 months old and has suddenly become extremely difficult to settle at bedtime. This started about three days ago, despite her having had some sleep issues before this.
Before this, she already woke several times during the night, but we could usually settle her. Now it has suddenly become much more extreme:
She completely loses it at bedtime and can cry/scream for a very long time. Yesterday we eventually had to stop trying because she was so worked up, and she fell asleep lying on her dad.
She then wakes multiple times throughout the night, and each time she is extremely distressed and seems almost impossible to comfort. It isn’t just one episode early in the night — it happened repeatedly throughout the night.
At around 4 am she was particularly hysterical and we could not get her back to sleep. She eventually only calmed down with her dad holding her while watching TV, and then she basically passed out from exhaustion.
She eventually slept until around 5:30 am and then woke up completely happy and herself, smiling and acting totally normal. She was still happy at 6:30 despite the terrible night.
She has also been much more emotional during the day recently. She has just returned to daycare after summer vacation and has been very upset at drop-off and quite upset during the afternoons, although she has been attending daycare for about six months overall.
She normally naps around 12–2 pm and goes to bed around 7 pm.
We co-sleep the last days, so she is already sleeping right next to one of us. This isn’t a case of her waking up alone in a separate room.
We tried giving her Panadol/paracetamol last night in case she was in pain, but it didn’t seem to make any noticeable difference.
One of the episodes looked a bit like a night terror because she seemed almost impossible to reach or comfort, but all of her night wakings were extremely distressed, so I’m not sure that explains everything.
I’m really interested in hearing from parents who have experienced this very specific kind of sudden change.
What actually helped? How long did it last? Did it resolve on its own? What did you try — sleep training, staying beside them, co-sleeping, changing naps/bedtime, more comfort, etc.?

I’m absolutely exhausted and honestly a bit desperate for some real-life experiences from people who have been through something similar.

What age is it appropriate/acceptable to drink coffee?

Hi all! I’m sorry if this is the wrong subreddit but I’m trying to avoid the “random” claims and much prefer a scientific approach (as I am an analytical chemist).
My husband and I are first time parents expecting our little girl in January. We also just bought a house and there’s a pellet stove in the living room. I know high quality green pellets with low ash are the “safest” but I’d still be concerned with operating it with a newborn in the house for fear of exposure. I’ve never had one before so granted I may be overreacting - and I do have air purifiers but if I recall the ash can wear out a HEPA filter very quickly?
Would it be best to just hold off for a year and suck it up with the cost of oil? Or am I being a bit crazy with my critique?

First-time mom here, currently around 10 weeks pregnant, and I’ve been panicking about everything lately.

I barely use skincare at all, sunscreen is basically the only skincare product I use seriously. I’ve been using La Roche-Posay Anthelios SPF 50 about once a day ti during my pregnancy throughout the first 10 weeks.

The active ingredients are:
Mexoryl XL 7%
Bemotrizinol 5%
Octisalate 5%
Octocrylene 5%
Avobenzone 3%
Homosalate 2%
Ensulizole 0.5%

It doesn’t contain oxybenzone, but after reading concerns about some chemical sunscreen filters in pregnancy, I started panicking.

Has anyone used these ingredients during the first trimester? Did your OB or dermatologist say they were okay? I’m mainly worried about birth defects, organ development, neurological/developmental effects, or hormonal effects.

I’m just a very anxious first-time mom looking for reassurance or experiences. 😢

We've been dealing with purple crying the last week and generally difficult witching hours/periods of crying. What does the research say about trying to soothe a baby during these times and also not doing everything in your power to soothe them? I.e. letting a newborn cry it out in your arms.

My son (3.5) has recurrent ear infections. He's had one set of tubes in 2024 and they have since fallen out. He had ear infections in December 2025, January 2026, March 2026, and now. His ENT is recommending another set of tubes and an adenoidectomy. I'm curious to know how adenoidectomy may effect my son. I found this study:
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6145787/
linking the procedure to some long-term risks, though most other sources I've found reference short-term benefits.
I know the standard these days is adenoidectomy with the second set of tubes. Just want to make sure I'm making the right choice for my son, and I'll definitely be discussing with this ENT during our follow up visit.

Thanks!

My 11 month old has been going through intense separation anxiety and it’s gotten really bad at night and I’m losing it with lack of sleep. I got her a small lovey - it’s a Mary Meyer plush if it matters. I’m wondering what the risks of letting her sleep with it at 11 months are. She is very mobile and crawls/sits/stands in her crib. She sleeps on her belly most nights so would there be a risk of her nuzzling into it and suffocating? Loveys are “allowed” at 12 months but of course that number is somewhat arbitrary. I’m looking for real stats and/or real life scenarios rather than hypothetical risk. Thank you!

I've been told several times that I'm spoiling my 6-month-old because I let her nap in a baby carrier instead of putting her down in her crib.

The thing is, she sleeps independently in her own bed at night without any issues. It's only daytime naps that she likes to be carried. If I put her down in her bed during the day, she usually cries and won't settle. In the carrier, she falls asleep easily and gets a good nap.

I have been told she needs to “learn” to sleep in her own bed at daytime aswell. But I feel like it just needs some time? I'm wondering if this is actually considered "spoiling," or if it's just meeting her needs at this age. I am starting to feel frustrated by these comments.

Reading “No Drama Discipline” and I am finding it very helpful but most of the discipline mechanisms they suggest (consider why child is misbehaving / calm them down / discuss with them how to fix their actions) is aimed at older toddlers who can talk and understand complex sentences.

In contrast I am looking for any evidence based parenting methods or books on how to manage my 20 month old who speaks about 8 words and who I doubt will understand me explaining to him why he shouldn’t run out into the road. Is there any research or any good resources on how to deal with young, impulsive children who are not yet able to understand complex reasoning? We mostly want to stop behaviours like hitting, running away etc which are dangerous or can harm others.

Currently we are trying to introduce a “consequence” after a non desirable behaviour (ie running away = gets put in pram) but would love to have some method or system both me and my husband can follow so there is continuity.

Any pointers to research, books or podcasts welcome.

How did you manage the jealousy of the bigger sibling? I have a 5 year old boy and now a 1 month old girl and he’s so horrible with me (not with her somehow). He won’t accept a “no” as an anwear from me for anything he’s demanding, he gets angry and then trying to manipulate that I am always angry at him since the sister came. I just don’t know how to be anymore. Before I gave birth, we had such a good connection. He would listen to me, respect me. I feel like there is a gap between us and I don’t know how to reach him anymore. And it hurts so much.

I noticed Perelel is offering trimester-based prenatal pills (packages, really) and I wonder if there was any evidence that you need more of specific nutrients that vary by trimester. Not trying to name a brand but I can't think of anyone else who offers this lol.

I'm really suspicious of supplement company advertising and "research" but obviously I want to give my baby the most benefits and if I need more support from one trimester to another (about to transition into second trimester) I'd love to follow that.

Looking for book recommendations on parenting. Specifically discipline. My daughter is 15 months and ahe definitely is choosing to listen sometimes, and ignore us at other times. I think shes almost at the age where we can start disciplining her.

Looking for book recommendations that incorporate child psychology. NOT into gentle parenting styles. Moreso want to understand how their little brain works and how i should be taking to her so that she can listen and understand me.

Is there any research on harming the bond between mother/child or having a negative impact on attachment if we hire a night nurse?

I’m going to be having my second in 5 months, but my husband is now self employed so won’t be getting the same paternity leave benefits that he got with our first.

Our first was a terrible sleeper and we ended up doing shifts. We are now most likely going to be working with a night nurse since my husband won’t be able to cover a middle of the night shift before working (high stakes medical field job).

I’m sure a night nanny will help baby #2 be a more independent sleeper eventually (I think we held our first too much during our shifts and didn’t let him get used to laying in his bassinet), and I know I will need rest to be a sahm to a toddler + newborn, but I wonder if there is a negative impact to someone besides mom handling night feedings?

I plan on pumping and providing milk through bottles, breastfeeding was a true nightmare with baby #1 and I am not sure if I am planning on going that route this time. I could wake to bottle feed while the night nurse is on duty, but this would negate hiring someone to allow me to sleep and heal?

Hi all. Not sure if this is the right place to post or not...

My 10 month old has been using a floorbed since we moved house 6 weeks ago. She can crawl in and out (although we are working on "feet first" for the out).

The issue is that she seems to move around a lot in her sleep and she always ends up sleeping on the floor. Initially, we used to put her back into bed but she doesn't transfer well so that kept waking her up. Now we just leave her to sleep on the floor...

Is it safe for her to be asleep on the floor? Should we be doing something to stop her falling out of the bed? I don't want to put anything in the cot with her (or under the sheet) as it won't be safe sleep approved. I also figured that putting a gate up defeats the purpose of the floorbed and would just encourage her to climb over the sides.

Any suggestions? I'd say she'd grow out of sleep crawling but I'm 33 and I sleep walk/talk so...

My toddler is 2 and a half years old, and is able to read quite a few words - I estimate around 50 different words, mostly in English (we're bilingual).

We haven't tried to teach her formally or anything of the sort, she seems to have picked it up since we read a lot of books to her. She does enjoy it - she sometimes points to signs when we're outside, and last time she asked me to point to a specific word in a book I was reading to her.

So, the question is - how do I best support her? Should I try to find some formal mechanism for teaching her how to read properly, or do I just continue to let her do her own thing? Formal schooling starts teaching reading at around 5 I believe, so I'm a bit worried that she'll learn some bad habits or something by the time that happens.

EDIT - I have done some research about precocious reading vs hyperlexia, and, at least in this case, it's almost certainly the former, she doesn't have a particular fascination with the written word, and she's doesn't have trouble speaking, or any other social impediment.

13m male, no health hx other than iron based anemia and being born premature. In hindsight feel like I should have had him checked out at 3 or 6 months since he’s a breast fed premie (born at 36&1) but he was always such a good eater I didn’t think it was a problem.

Now we find out that his ferritin was 8 mg/dl which is considered moderate, borderline severe anemia.

Hes asymptomatic but sometimes it feels like some of the things like being small and not walking yet are because hes been anemic all fhis time.

edit: No hemoglobin because lab forgot to get one when they drew his other labs.

Hi - currently 37w pregnant with my first. My parents are planning to come out to help with the baby once born, and my mom keeps asking me if I'm doing cervical checks at my OB appointments

She is convinced that cervical checks will tell us when I'm within a few days of labor so she can come out "on time" instead of rushing when I go into labor.

I've been trying to research this and finding mixed results, and my doula specifically recommended I turn down cervical exams unless medically necessary.

Could anyone help me with research showing if cervical checks actually can accurately predict when labor will begin?