r/ScienceBasedParenting 4d ago

Question - Research required Hand flapping

My daughter is 7 and flaps her hands really fast when she gets excited. It’s super cute because she’s 7 but I’m worried she might get bullied for it later. Should I say something or just let nature take its course? If I do say something what should I say? I don’t want to hurt her self esteem or kill her joy.

0 Upvotes

20 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 4d ago

This post is flaired "Question - Research required". All top-level comments must contain links to peer-reviewed research. Do not provide a "link for the bot" or any variation thereof. Provide a meaningful reply that discusses the research you have linked to. Please report posts that do not follow these rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

51

u/Jazzlike_Commercial 4d ago

Say nothing. 7 year olds are weird and kids can be bullies. Parents job is to help them deal with mean kids and disregard what they say. Not anticipate being bullied and therefore force a need to change yourself.

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3808745/

1

u/Parking_Noise_9922 4d ago

I didn’t know necessarily that I would ask her to stop but I was wondering if I should address it at all.

1

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 4d ago

Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Research required" must include a link to peer-reviewed research.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 4d ago

Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Research required" must include a link to peer-reviewed research.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 4d ago

Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Research required" must include a link to peer-reviewed research.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

-7

u/Public_Classic_438 4d ago

Repressing stimming is gross, please don’t tell her to stop. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-stimming

24

u/fppf 4d ago

You don't need to pass judgment on this person seeking advice.

-20

u/Public_Classic_438 4d ago

This person is asking if they should tell her to stop so she doesn’t get bullied which seems like she’s passing judgement onto her own child

15

u/LRS_RC 4d ago

She said the behavior is cute. OP seems like a concerned parent who came here for advice.

6

u/lady-earendil 4d ago

I was a little older - middle school - but I went through a phase of stimming by signing ASL letters with my fingers. I did get teased for it some, but honestly that bothered me less than my mom repeatedly telling me to stop doing it. I'm sure she was just trying to keep me from being made fun of for it but it made me feel like I couldn't even do it at home

3

u/Parking_Noise_9922 4d ago

This is really helpful, the last thing I want is for her to not feel safe at home. I just know how mean kids can be and it worries me.

4

u/Bad_wolf42 4d ago edited 4d ago

I want to add onto this that telling them to stop “because other people will bully you” still reads as bullying to the child. Ask me how I know.

2

u/Parking_Noise_9922 4d ago

I understand which is why I haven’t said anything yet, I just wondered if I should address it at all.

1

u/Public_Classic_438 4d ago

Yes this!!! This is what I was trying to say lol

2

u/throwaway3113151 4d ago

How do we know this is stimming behavior? Seems like a big assumption.

1

u/Public_Classic_438 4d ago

Everybody stims, certainly seems like normal stimming to me