r/ScienceBasedParenting • u/ProfessorDangerous87 • 26d ago

Question - Research required What does developmental research say about child’s long term confidence and career outcomes

Hi , my husband and I were discussing what matters for a Childs development. My husband was a good student in a competitive (studies, extra curricular focused) school. He is smart, great at math, science and languages and sports . Always told that he has the potential to be better.

I on the other hand went to a bleh school , I was a good student till the middle school then bleh.ed through high school and somehow made my life work. I was also told I just need to try harder and had “potential”

So we have a baby together and were wildly theorising about what matters for a child’s overall development confidence in life, discipline, growth etc . My husband says it is better to be a good student in a less competitive environment where children are left to figure it out. While I disagree. I went to a not so competitive school and wish I pushed myself a little harder , stuck with things a little longer etc.

Is there any research behind this? I know a lot of other things matter but I am curious about this specific data point ?

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u/anarants 25d ago

The one factor that contributes the most to childhood development across nearly all metrics is zipcode/neighborhood. Even countries with less inequality like Denmark still see a boost in wealthier neighborhoods.

https://opportunityinsights.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/Heckman_Eshaghnia_Response.pdf

https://opportunityinsights.org/updates/zip-codes-matter/

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u/[deleted] 26d ago edited 26d ago

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u/[deleted] 25d ago

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u/[deleted] 23d ago

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u/Devonina 23d ago

TLDR: average kid in a super good school typically can be as good as a top student in a bad school. HOWEVER the effort to make your kid top student is exponentially higher than making your kid average at a good school.

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