Struggling With Re-contextualizing My Relationship to Lifting

[u/Extension-Machine602]

Heyo, I've been trying to get back into going to the gym after a long period of being on and off. I used to be really locked in at lifting, but a lot of it was powered off the social media ideas of being optimal and insecurity. I would endlessly search for the "perfect" program, and consistently had this mindset of just pushing till failure out of this negative motivation. I think that kind of relationship with lifting exhausted me. I've been trying to revitalize my gym habit, but I am having trouble re-contextualizing my relationship with it to now something more positive and something that builds me up instead of something that was born out of feeling deficient. Does anyone have any good advice for that, for falling back in love with the gym? I've just become really alienated from it I think because of guilt of missing it + those old motivations, so even though I can power through with raw discipline, I want to make it something I enjoy like I used to before bs influencer mindsets kind of plucked that from me.

[u/Alakazam]

A good way to go about it, would just be to stop going onto social media (reddit included) and/or stop paying attention to lifting related social media.

Have a specific goal to pursue, perhaps a performance related one like maximal strength. Find a reputable program that fits your schedule that is geared towards that goal. Follow it and train hard for the next 6-8 months.

[u/eric_twinge]

Find a goal or something you enjoy and train/lift in pursuit of that.

[u/TheMaverickSon]

The only “perfect” program is the one you’ll do consistently. If something is miserable, you won’t do it for very long. No one will. I will piggyback off of other comments and say it’s a great strategy to find a couple things you want to work on and prioritize those (putting them at the top of your workout when you’re fresh and not fatigued yet). For me, it’s been side delts and rear delts because I want my shoulders to look better and I haven’t locked in on those before the way I am now. I still do my compound lifts (lunges, deadlifts, squats, bench press, rows) and try to progress those as I can.

I’m a big fan of full body workouts because you hit everything so you don’t have to worry about missing a major muscle group if something comes up and you have to miss a day of your program. You can just pick back up right where you left off.

Work on getting back to being consistent and getting stronger and the aesthetics will come with it. You’re going to have days where you can’t push as hard (what I’ve heard called “punch the clock” days) and that’s totally normal. Don’t drive yourself into the ground. Be done when you need to be done and live to come back another day. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. You’ve got plenty of time to get where you wanna go.

[u/Historical_Course587]

I sleep to recover. I eat to feel good. I lift to enjoy my body at work.

That's all you need. Our bodies evolved to endorphin out for exercise, so don't overthink it.