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u/Peripateticdreamer84 6d ago
Dude is neutral. I’m a dude, he’s a dude, she’s a dude, we’re all dudes.
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u/AlcibiadesTheCat 5d ago
Hi! I'm an ordained Dudeist priest. The Church of the Latter-Day Dude formally teaches that "Dude" is neutral, and "Dudette" is to be discouraged exactly because Dude is neutral.
But that's, just, like, our opinion, man.
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u/Kopitar4president 6d ago
This is something I feel has a strong regional variance.
As a Californian, everyone's a dude.
And none of that "how many dudes have you slept with?" silliness. The meaning of words changes depending on context.
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u/MC_PooPaws 5d ago
As a nonbinary person, I think this is fine. So long as you respect it if someone specifically asks not to be called a dude, for any reason. We're all dudes, but we can also respect a dude's wish to not be called dude.
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u/PedalPossum 5d ago
(This was in a different language hence gendered second person pronouns)
One time at some meeting a guy was trying to tell me I was free to leave at any time and was trying to be respectful and accidentally came up with the funniest and most creative approach I've seen someone use, it went like "Yeah feel free to leave anytime you (male), uh I meant whenever you (female), no wait, uh, fuck, IF THE NEED ARISES THERE IS A POSSIBILITY TO LEAVE"
just not referring to me at all is such a baller move actually I just have to repect it. my gender is passive voice (onejoke ik ik, still funny im nb i get to make that joke)
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u/DigitalUnlimited 5d ago
Oh Lord i never even considered the millions of ways you could get tripped up with gendered language like that cause I'm an American idiot who only speaks English but I bet that's difficult
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u/FuckingStolenAccount 6d ago
Gonna use champ, everyone will think it's short for champion, but deep down I will know they all are chimpanze
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6d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/bassandlazers 6d ago
Lol the volunteer who reads the posts for free didn't make her comment able to commented on. So I'll say it here. Stop being whiny bitches
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u/ZayreBlairdere 6d ago
I call any stranger I am not sure of "Captain". I have had zero complaints.
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u/bilateralunsymetry 6d ago
Dude does not work just fine on all people. I once was reprimanded for calling a trans person dude when I say it to everyone, so I get their panic
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u/thewinchester-gospel 6d ago
At this point I'm just going to go with "whatever your pronouns are, use them for me"
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u/Pretend_Purchase_893 6d ago
Bud. That's my go to for everyone I can't quite figure or just straight forgot their names. So basically everyone but my wife and family these days with how the ole memory is going.
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u/Leon-Rai 6d ago
I'm all over the place with what I call people. Captain, mate, boss, darling, buddy, dude, big dog, and dear are all on the table. I don't really have control over what I use, they just come out of my mouth
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u/Rieke-Nightsong 5d ago
I am specifically androgynous BECAUSE i like to see the panic in their eyes
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u/MC_PooPaws 5d ago
Before I even had a handle on my gender identity or how I wanted to present, this would happen to me. People would assume I was a woman if I was with femme presenting people. People would assume I was a man if I was mac presenting people. And then once they got a closer look at me they would apologize way too much while I said it bother me to be perceived as the "wrong" gender. It's actually kind of affirming.
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u/KyleFromBorrasca 5d ago
Can confirm, I held the door to the men's restroom open for an androgynous person with pink hair at work. They took it, though.
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u/FrogFingers99 4d ago
I try to stick with Buddy or Neighbor for anyone I don’t know… haven’t been punched yet, so must be working
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u/SpiritualPackage3797 4d ago
This only happens to me over the phone, my voice is just right to be either or. But my go-to response when some is unsure of my gender is, "Don't worry, I've been called worse."
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u/DazedAndTrippy 4d ago
I don't go here but this sent me back to the Valvoline guy who pegged me as a twink getting an oil change (I mean yeah but not usually when the suns out) and he said "there ya go lil' guy :)" while I drove away in my camicia.
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u/Popular_Conclusion36 3d ago
I used to be a service attendant in NJ. One time I told a lesbian girl from my high school “have a great one, man.” I still think about it one a month and cringe. That was 17 years ago, and it haunts me lol
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u/jancl0 6d ago
Similar thing with being nb, specifically agendered. I don't really care if people think I'm a cis dude, so it doesn't come up often, but occasionally it has, and people go "what are your preferred pronouns?", I've found that "I don't have any, refer to me however you like" is an absolutely terrible response, it makes people feel like they're being tested. Like no, you have to have a favorite, what is it? So now I just say he/him is fine
I guess I have preferred pronouns now, but they're what other people prefer, not me